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Get Out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
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Practical, proven self help steps show how to transform 40 common self-defeating behaviors, including procrastination, envy, obsession, anger, self-pity, compulsion, neediness, guilt, rebellion, inaction, and more.
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This just wasn’t for me. While the information was relevant and the chapters laid out well it just felt very much like reading cliff notes. The chapters were very short. Couple pages to cover the topic and then some bullet points to summarize. Left me wanting more substance.
Will use as refrence
I've been in a self help mode. This book was ok for that. Written in a format that allows the reader to refer back as needed
I've been in a self help mode. This book was ok for that. Written in a format that allows the reader to refer back as needed
Great insights. Well written and concise. Easy to read and follow. Great applicable advice for each SDB. Fantastic resource. I’ll refer back to it again and again!!!
It was an ok book in general. But I I learned nee stuff.
Rather simplified
Very handy book, really covers a lot of different things and there is something for everyone.
Worth the read. Easy to read. Lots of good lessons.
This book, I'm sure is very helpful to some but I found it very hard to read.
2.5 stars
Really cool/helpful short chapters that give you a different perspective to take in and on life to navigate through everything a little "easier".
I don’t recall how I came across this book. This is the book about inter personal relationships instead of how to overcome the inner personal dilemma.
I found the information helpful and I enjoyed the examples provided in each chapter. I found myself skipping over the quotes because the print was so small.
Short, easy to digest chapters with succinct, timeless advice. Worth a read especially if you tend to groan to self-help books.
I like that this book was quick and to the point. It’s a quick read and the structure lends itself to be very user friendly as a guide to come back to.
Great, relevant quotes. Few aha moments.
Good read. Points were easy to follow and understand with a clear directive on how to improve.
Everybody should read this book. It gives short little lessons in things that we all suffer from and how to get yourself out of those behaviour patterns. I got a lot out of it.
Didn't resonate.
The author has a difficult time staying focused on a single idea at the time. He hops from one topic to another incessantly and this makes it very difficult to digest the ideas he is trying to share.
My therapist recommended this book. There were a lot of things I related to that gave me some hope and alternative ways of thinking. Truly a good book that I can look back when I need to.
Easy to read but full of interesting insights, quotes, snippets that you can use and a brief explanation of 40 common self-defeating behaviours. I bet we all exhibit a few of them.
Goulston is a psychiatrist and therefore comes at this with a wealth of experience and writes in a very approachable style. Huge subject of course, how we get in our own way is something we deal with all day every day so his approach to reducing each chapter to manageable chunks is very welcome and works well.
Sometime ...more
Goulston is a psychiatrist and therefore comes at this with a wealth of experience and writes in a very approachable style. Huge subject of course, how we get in our own way is something we deal with all day every day so his approach to reducing each chapter to manageable chunks is very welcome and works well.
Sometime ...more
An overview of 40 common behaviors in which people engage (knowingly or not). Each negative behavior comes with a brief overview of why the rest of the world finds those behaviors annoying (and, thus, diminishes the ability of the person engaged in the behavior to get what they want in life) and some basic ideas for self-improvement. Not surprisingly, the book does not have much depth into each behavior or ideas for improvement -- there are tons of books written about each of the annoying behavi
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I really liked this book. It was a simple read. The chapters were not too long and it had a lot of simple insights for each chapter to reflect on during the day that help break the self sabotaging habits in your life. It was definitely a good read for me to reflect on some choices I've made and behaviors I've had in the past that I need to evaluate on so that I can have happier relationships and a better life.
What I like about this book is that you can build a relationship with the author by em ...more
What I like about this book is that you can build a relationship with the author by em ...more
By chance, as I was making my way through a stack of magazines, I read a quote from this book. Finding it insightful, I requested How to Get Out of Your Own Way from the library and enjoyed reading it from cover to cover so much that I bought it. One for myself and one to give away. I really appreciated the brevity of each chapter as it focused on a self-defeating behavior: providing examples, some background, steps for correction and a quote to help fix the desired behavior in mind. I expect to
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3-1/2 stars maybe.
I started this book quite a while ago, before we moved, and got about 2/3 of the way through before it went back on the shelf. Picked it up a couple of days ago and zoomed through start to finish.
As self-help books go, it's not bad. Goulson addresses 40 self-defeating behaviors (e.g., procrastinating, holding a grudge, acting needy, etc., etc.). After a brief discussion of each, he provides a "usable insight" about the behavior and then a series of steps/bullet points for chang ...more
I started this book quite a while ago, before we moved, and got about 2/3 of the way through before it went back on the shelf. Picked it up a couple of days ago and zoomed through start to finish.
As self-help books go, it's not bad. Goulson addresses 40 self-defeating behaviors (e.g., procrastinating, holding a grudge, acting needy, etc., etc.). After a brief discussion of each, he provides a "usable insight" about the behavior and then a series of steps/bullet points for chang ...more
This is one of those books you feel almost embarrassed to admit you have read. The reality is the lessons taught are so common in today's society either in our own lives of the lives of the people we live and work with.
This is a very readable book with each chapter being 3-4 pages and providing actionable insight.
In fact I finished chapter 3 and got right on the phone and made a call I have been putting off for 6 years now.
If you and your family are perfect and were raised in perfect environmen ...more
This is a very readable book with each chapter being 3-4 pages and providing actionable insight.
In fact I finished chapter 3 and got right on the phone and made a call I have been putting off for 6 years now.
If you and your family are perfect and were raised in perfect environmen ...more
Not bad for a "self help" book. It's kind of a Cliffs Notes-version touching on a lot of different topics, all stemming from self-defeating behaviors. I couldn't relate to all of the topics, but some did hit home hard. His style is easy enough to read. He interjects quotes, a few cheesy, a few profound. I would recommend it to someone who is looking for positive ways to start making changes in their life.
I liked the use of quotes in this book and I liked that each section was small. It was a quick and easy read. I imagine I'll come back to it for reference in the future as well. The author used stories often and I found myself relating to many of the traits of these characters. I would recommend this to anyone who works in a helping profession or works intently on their own personal growth and development.
I really thought this book would be a bit more in depth, but within the 175 pages, the author actually went through 40 topics! Each topic was represented by 2-3 anecdotes, an explanation of the "self-Defeating behavior", and a bullet list advising ways to avoid it.
While I may have identified with several, I did not find much in the way of answers or psychological research, etc inside.
I would have to say the book was a bit of a let down for me.
While I may have identified with several, I did not find much in the way of answers or psychological research, etc inside.
I would have to say the book was a bit of a let down for me.
Although this is really the first self-help book I have read, it was just what I was searching for. I will definitely read it again, possibly a time or two after that and I will recommend it to anyone that I feel needs it. Of course, it takes energy to learn and make changes but this book is like the quick guide to those negative themes most common in our lives.
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MARK GOULSTON, M.D., is a business psychiatrist and consultant, author of the bestselling Just Listen, and subject of the PBS special “Just Listen with Dr. Goulston.” He writes a Tribune syndicated career column; blogs for Fast Company, Business Insider, Huffington Post, and Psychology Today; and is featured frequently in major media including The Wall Street Journal, Harvard Business Review, Fort
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“Emotions are built on layers. Beneath hatred is usually anger; beneath anger is frustration; beneath frustration is hurt; beneath hurt is fear. If you keep expressing your feelings, you will generally move through them in that order. What begins with “I hate you” culminates in “I’m scared. I don’t want to lose you, and I don’t know what to do about it.”
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“You know the old saying, “If you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen.” Well, if you always get out as soon as the kitchen gets hot, your life will end up half-baked.”
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