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Depressive Illness: The Curse Of The Strong (Overcoming Common Problems)

Tim Cantopher

4.16 · Rating details · 425 ratings · 44 reviews

In contrast many books on depression, this text takes the view that those most susceptible to depression are people with strong personalities. Being naturally conscientious and reliable, they tend to carry on under great stress, where weaker people would simply give up. In the end the burden becomes too much and they succumb to depression rather like a rubber band which wi ...more

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Paperback, 128 pages

Published April 1st 2003 by Sheldon Press

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Oct 08, 2011 Songs and Sonnets rated it really liked it

Shelves: mental-health, depression

This book has revolutionised the way I view myself and my depression.

It’s not a self-help book as such. It provides information on stress-related depression, with occasional bits of advice. There are no exercises to complete. Intead, Depressive Illness: The Curse of the Strong helps you to understand how your illness developed, why you need to be gentle with yourself and what you need to do to get better.

I first developed severe depression after pushing myself too hard during my final year at un This book has revolutionised the way I view myself and my depression.

It’s not a self-help book as such. It provides information on stress-related depression, with occasional bits of advice. There are no exercises to complete. Intead, Depressive Illness: The Curse of the Strong helps you to understand how your illness developed, why you need to be gentle with yourself and what you need to do to get better.

I first developed severe depression after pushing myself too hard during my final year at university. For years, I thought of myself as weak. I struggled to cope with everyday life, was often too depressed to work, and I hated myself for not being able to function like a “normal” human being. Tim Cantopher turned that view of myself on its head. He argues that those who develop stress-related depression are actually hard-working, perfectionistic people with a strong work ethic who burn themselves out. This was very true of me but in the mire of negative thoughts that’s part and parcel of depression, I hadn’t been able to see it until someone else pointed it out.

Before reading this book, I’d tried many CBT-based self-help books with practical exercises to complete. These were very helpful on one level – challenging negative thoughts makes a huge difference – but on another level they just fed into my perfectionism issues. I always felt like I should be doing more to fight against my depression. I pushed myself too hard and it was a vicious circle. Since reading this book I’ve completely changed my approach to depression.

Cantopher advocates rest as an essential part of depression treatment. He actually recommends a wall-to-wall diet of Australian soap operas as a distraction from how you feel (not my thing, but hey). As you start to feel better and to want to get things done, he suggests leaving tasks half-finished as soon as you find yourself becoming tired. If you push yourself too far, he says, you’ll end up feeling much worse for the next 36-72 hours. Apparently a pattern of good days and bad days is normal in depression recovery, but if you overdo it on the good days, the pattern becomes exaggerated, you’ll have more bad days and take longer to recover. It literally can be a case of one step forward, four steps back.

The book is not without its flaws. Firstly, Cantopher makes a lot of assumptions about the depressed reader. One of the reasons I found The Curse of the Strong so helpful is that they all applied to me, but if they don’t apply to you, you’re likely to feel pissed off, not to mention disturbed that he “almost never bother[s]” to make enquiries as to his patients’ personality because he knows it all already. Secondly, he states his own theories and beliefs about the biological side of depression as though they were undisputed scientific fact. Although this sort of thing is common within the medical model, I don’t believe there is sufficient evidence to claim that depression is a physical rather than a mental illness; nor do I believe that in almost all cases it could be diagnosed with a lumbar puncture showing reduced levels of serotonin and noradrenaline. (Surely if that were the case, LPs would be performed in cases of diagnostic doubt. I realise it’s an unpleasant and risky procedure, but then severe depression is just as unpleasant and life-threatening.) I think this is all part of Cantopher’s rhetoric to convince the reader that they are not weak or to blame for their illness, but frankly, any scientific “facts” that you come across in his book I would check elsewhere.

Anyway, despite these problems, Cantopher’s theories on how stress-related depression develops and how to recover from it make a lot of sense to me and have probably been instrumental in helping me cope with and recover from my depressive episodes. ...more

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Apr 01, 2013 Zechy rated it it was amazing

Shelves: health

So, my sister recommended this book to me, and I really didn't get it. Because, I wasn't depressed, was I? Obviously not. Anyway, I was halfway through the first chapter when I first realized that he was describing my life of the last few years word for word. So much information in such a small book. So, yeah. Definitely recommended for anyone who has depression, or knows anyone who has depression, or is at all interested in depression, or anyone else really. It's just that good.

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Mar 22, 2013 Craig rated it it was ok

Shelves: psychopharmacology

I was initially drawn to this book because the author, Tim Cantopher MD, makes it apparent in his introduction that clinical depression is a physical illness. This assertion really spiked my interest. However, it soon becomes apparent that Cantopher's 'physical illness' is a byproduct of the demands of modern-day living. Essentially, he argues, that depressives 'catch' depression by leading lives which are too demanding. This hypothesis, however, fails to satisfactorily account for dysthymia and I was initially drawn to this book because the author, Tim Cantopher MD, makes it apparent in his introduction that clinical depression is a physical illness. This assertion really spiked my interest. However, it soon becomes apparent that Cantopher's 'physical illness' is a byproduct of the demands of modern-day living. Essentially, he argues, that depressives 'catch' depression by leading lives which are too demanding. This hypothesis, however, fails to satisfactorily account for dysthymia and/or chronic recurrent unipolar depression. And, of course, since depression, in this paradigm, is a physical illness caused by a traceable personality trait - working too hard, it can be treated satisfactorily by 'learning' to not work too hard and taking anti-depression medications (SSRIs, TCAs, SNRIs etc). These medications, Cantopher claims, work best when augmented by talking therapy, particularly CBT. This, of course, is all standard, party-line stuff, and may be a bitter pill - no pun intended - for the sufferer of recurrent unipolar depression and/or dysthymia, for whom anti-depression medication may well offer no relief whatsoever. (Indeed St John's Wort may be more efficacious!). Nevertheless, the consideration that depression may have a physiological basis, rather than a purely psychological one, is intriguing, given that in today's CBT-centric Britain, depression is increasingly seen as a fleeting low mood that 10 sessions of 30-minute-long CBT can 'cure'. However, Cantopher's insistence that depression is a physical illness leads, predictably, to the claim that taking ones anti-depression meds WILL make everything better. Andrew Solomon's comparison of SSRIs to vine-hacking tools in his book on depression was cringe-worthy. Fortunately Cantopher doesn't go that far, but his faith in pharmacology and modern psychiatry is slightly nauseating. With that said, this book is, ultimately, more of the same: Take your SSRIs and go for 10 sessions of CBT and you'll be 'all better'. Oh, and remember to relax every now and then, because modern life places stress on your limbic system, which is the ultimate cause of depression. My rating is two stars: "It was OK". (For those with a deeper interest in the 'biological psychiatry' vs 'anti-biological psychiatry' debate consider comparing and contrasting the works of Peter Kramer and Peter Breggin.)
Please visit and 'like' FADS - the Forum for Anxiety and Depression Sufferers!
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Forum-... ...more

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Dec 08, 2012 Derek Baldwin rated it really liked it

Quite short, and at times a little simplistic, but a valuable book nevertheless which I shall certainly dip into many more times, just as I already read some sections several times along the way. the central thesis is that it's the very resilient people who seem to cope well with what life throws at them, seemingly without complaint, who may end up disastrously unwell when things finally reach tipping point. this certainly resonated with me.

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Jun 02, 2017 Nynke rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Please, everybody who knows someone with depressive illness, read the intro and chapter 1 of this book! Apparantly lots of tips for healthy people in here too. haven't gotten to that bit yet (only at chapter 4).

written in easy to understand English yet informative and accurate.

The only thing that really bugs me about this book is it's title. I can see it is fitting in relation to the content, however it is literally stopping me from getting copies for the people in my life whom i would really l ...more

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Jan 22, 2013 Lorelei rated it really liked it

Shelves: nonfiction

I'm so happy to have read this book. While I don't seem to suffer from depression generally, I did have a terrible bout of it a few Januarys back. So much of what is in here is applicable to all sorts of things, including my own I.C.I. (Invisible Chronic Illness) multiple sclerosis - about choices and about pacing yourself. The parts that dealt specifically with depression weren't terribly helpful to me personally, but are probably good to know. And if you are dealing with depressive illness in ...more

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Jun 14, 2013 Wendy rated it it was amazing

I bought this book after I listened to an interview of Tim Cantopher. I now have to keep track of who I have lent it to! I guess this book provides different things to different people but what I like about it is the logic and explanation to a topic that is very taboo at times. 'Stiff upper lip' and 'we all get low' was part of my upbringing; depression was not an option. I believe this book is a fabulous opportunity to start understanding depression whether you suffer or know someone who does.

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Feb 11, 2013 Bookish rated it really liked it

Shelves: living-with-trauma

a very good read: short sentences, logical and easy to take in

Tim Cantopher has a really good way of explaining things and it's quite a small book so not too overwhelming to digest if your concentration is a bit limited

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Nov 08, 2012 Denise rated it really liked it

Excellent little book; very insightful - not only for sufferers but anyone living with someone prone to depressive episodes. Very readable, and highly recommended !

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Jan 03, 2018 Lance rated it really liked it

Recommends it for: Anyone who living with extremely high standards

Recommended to Lance by: Carolyn Barker

Shelves: 2018, self-help, recommendations

"Clinical depression is not a psychological or emotional state. It is a physical illness. Clinical depression is every bit as a physical a condition as pneumonia or a broken leg."

Psychiatrist Tim Cantopher's book is one of the most motivational self-help books I have read, and has got my 2018 goal to improve my mental health off to a great start. I found the very clear, concise, direct style extremely helpful, especially as there are so many conflicted opinions and a lot of personal guilt surrou "Clinical depression is not a psychological or emotional state. It is a physical illness. Clinical depression is every bit as a physical a condition as pneumonia or a broken leg."

Psychiatrist Tim Cantopher's book is one of the most motivational self-help books I have read, and has got my 2018 goal to improve my mental health off to a great start. I found the very clear, concise, direct style extremely helpful, especially as there are so many conflicted opinions and a lot of personal guilt surrounding depression.
The author is clear in recognising the internal strength of character of those who put so much into their lives that their mental health begins to suffer (Cantopher is clear from the start that he is discussing stress-induced depression, rather than depression linked to other life circumstances for which this may be less relevant). "This person is usually someone who is admired, if somewhat taken for granted by those around them. People are usually very surprised when they get ill; in fact, they are the last person you would expect to have a breakdown." The author frequently uses the metaphor of a fuse blowing to describe the onset of depression, "You need to respond to adversity with strength and resilience in order for the fuse to blow." Here, he stresses that the sufferer is determined and capable, which gives them the tools to combat the illness. I found this approach, which identified positive as well as harmful aspects of suffers' personality which contribute to depression as empowering. The illness is less overwhelming when seen within the context of a person's life as a whole.
The book contained a lot of helpful life-advice relevant to people with depression, their relatives, or just the population more generally. A personal favourite: "People with the strongest opinions are often those with the least knowledge, as once you consider any issue seriously, you often find that it defies a categorical opinion one way or the other." Another is his emphasis on learning through mistakes, and not demanding excessively high standards of yourself in everything you do. "what's really hard but correspondingly rewarding is to fail well." I also found it rewarding to have the author so clearly debunk the 'just pull yourself together and get on with it' advice, which is often offered by non-professionals who think they understand. "No you haven't, so stop making things worse with your ill-informed advice." Here, it really helped to have the authoritative voice of a clinician adding some weight and certainty behind the advice.
At the heart of this book is the personality of profiling of the depressed patient as someone who has had a lot to cope with in life and soldiered on without help for too. I found this intensely relatable, which helps with the feelings of isolation that often come along with depression. Each of the psychodynamic theories behind depression really spoke to me, from the 'superego' corrective voice of the harsh critical parent leading to the sufferer "overloaded with inhibition and self-reproach", repressed anger as a natural response to childhood trauma "people who suffer adversity learn at a tender age how to do this", lack of parental input leading to "no real choice but to withdraw inside herself", and learned helplessness as a result of childhood inconsistency. I think each of these threads makes sense of some aspect of my subconscious, and hopefully I can get more out of counselling sessions with this background.
Another really important aspect of this book was the focus on how to maintain and manage the recovery process. Many other self-help books discuss getting out of the acute phase of depression, but relatively few give warnings about the expected fluctuations in mood during recovery, or the key areas of lifestyle change which separate patients who go on to recover long-term from those who relapse. It really assuaged my guilt to hear the author's stance on those who continue to put others first and work extremely hard during their recovery. "If this is you, then I'm sorry, but you're choosing illness." The author has a lot of faith in the patient, which sufferers often don't have in themselves during depression. But this confidence in prioritising the self, and listening to the body for cues on how best to treat the mind, removes a lot of the tension from managing recovery. "How much can you do at any particular point in the recovery process? The truth is, I don't have the faintest idea, but you do because your body tell you." I think I will definitely return to this book when my self-esteem is low and my confidence in my own decisions diminished. The sense I took away from this book overall was empowerment, something I had never felt before as a depressed person.
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Jan 27, 2019 Antony Simpson rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Review from AntonySimpson.com:

Depressive Illness – The Curse of the Strong is a best selling book all about depression by Psychiatrist Dr Tim Cantopher. This book is outstanding.

Every aspect of the book has been created with a reader who is struggling with depression in mind.

This book is written as if the author is having a conversation with the reader.

The book is short, a total of 114 pages, as are the chapters, which is intentional as a symptom of depression is having a limited concentration s ...more

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Aug 18, 2018 Andrew Pratley rated it it was amazing

I am going through a depressive episode at the moment & this book was recommended to me by my therapist. It is not a long book but it is packed full of good advice which is easily digested. I am going to re-read a number of its chapters on a regular basis since they are full of good sense.

The central contention of the book is that depressive illness brought on by stress is not a condition that afflicts the weak or disengaged. It is instead an illness that afflicts the strong & engaged. I ...more

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Jul 09, 2018 Kym Hamer rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: bookshelved, business-educational

This is one of the best books I've read about depression and this is why. It doesn't just talk about the cause and the recovery options, it talks about the process of the illness itself. While most counsel 'taking it easy' and doing as much as you feel like, Cantopher uses his own patients' experiences to explain the exhaustion that knocks you sideways (dumping you like a big unexpected wave in the surf) as well as the ups and downs of the initial stages following diagnosis. Reading this book fe ...more

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Apr 03, 2018 Emma Turner rated it it was amazing

When I was first diagnosed with depression I refused to accept it. Whilst reading a self help book, this book was recommended and I can honestly say I am truly grateful for it.
It explains depression so well that when you are a suffering you feel the book was written about you. It’s full of ‘Aha’ moments and it has genuinely changed my outlook on mental illness. And I finally accepted my diagnosis.
Would highly recommend also to those struggling with a family member or friend who is dealing with d ...more

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Dec 28, 2016 Alyssa rated it liked it

While I did like this particular doctor's view of depression, I don't think it needed to be 112 pages long.
I do trust the insight, Dr. Cantopher has years of experience and seems to be a reputable Doctor, but a lot of the book seemed more like opinion and thoughts rather than researched based.
I would say read it, the book is pretty short and I did get some helpful insight.

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Oct 12, 2018 Emily Rowan rated it it was amazing

Shelves: mental-health

A great overview of depression, looking at how modern life fuels our mental health epidemic. This was the best piece of writing i've found that puts in understandable terms what happens to a depressed brain. A must-read on depression

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Nov 30, 2018 Paul rated it liked it · review of another edition

This is an excellent book, gave me a lot to think about. I wish I'd stumbled across it years ago.

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Dec 06, 2018 adrian m kwasnicki rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Uplifting

Recommended by my therapist. Thought I wouldn't get much out of it, but I learned a lot from this book. Thank you!

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Dec 03, 2017 Cassandra rated it it was ok

Relevant but unhelpful

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Mar 26, 2018 Nurazleen Abdul Majid rated it really liked it

Provide some general information about depression i think.

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Mar 12, 2017 Shelley Wilson rated it really liked it

Interesting read

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Feb 17, 2014 Shona Moyce rated it it was amazing

Recommends it for: Anyone who has depression, or knows someone with depression.

Shelves: non-fiction, owned-read

I read this book in bursts. Every time I picked it up, it presented me with a gift. I feel like I've done myself a huge favour simply for having read it. The author and doctor, Tim Cantopher, has a brilliant no-nonsense voice, and more to the point, that voice comes from a place of sound understanding.

Never before have I come across something, or someone for that matter, who could sum up this illness in a way that didn't feel belittling or judgmental. It's usually one or the other. To be perfect I read this book in bursts. Every time I picked it up, it presented me with a gift. I feel like I've done myself a huge favour simply for having read it. The author and doctor, Tim Cantopher, has a brilliant no-nonsense voice, and more to the point, that voice comes from a place of sound understanding.

Never before have I come across something, or someone for that matter, who could sum up this illness in a way that didn't feel belittling or judgmental. It's usually one or the other. To be perfectly honest, I've never made it past chapter two in any other self help book for depression. I've found them either too patronising, or lacking any kind of understanding.

This man however, this author - I want to write him a damn thank-you letter or something! He really gets it. Really and truly.

"'Oh, no! It's Monday morning. I don't want to get up. It's too early, the week is too long, I've got too much work to do and I need a holiday. I feel so depressed!'

Every Monday morning starts this way and I refuse to rise until I am running late, but after a while I drag myself grumpily out of bed and start my week. I have never been good at Mondays and it takes a while for my mood to pick up through the day. It isn't that I don't like my job; I do, very much. It is just that I like rest and recreation even more and on a Monday morning the next opportunity for these pleasures seems an awfully long way away.

Everyone has suffered spells of low mood of this type at some time or other and some people think that this means everyone has suffered from depression. It doesn't, or at least, not clinical depression or depressive illness. The truth is that clinical depression is a horrible illness of which most of us, thank goodness, have not the faintest inkling. This is one of the many trials sufferers from the illness have to face: people looking at them knowingly and saying, 'Oh, yes, I've often had that. I find the best thing is just to pull myself together and get busy.'

No you haven't, so stop making things worse with your ill-informed advice. If you really want to help, try to understand that sufferer of this illness is going through torment of a pretty awful kind."

Anyone who has ever suffered from this illness will appreciate the approach of this book. It allows for reflection and it offers up more advice and support than I could ever have hoped for. If you find yourself faced with well-meaning but desperately clueless folk, or a therapist who pushes you too hard, too soon, or friends and family who want you to 'pull yourself together' - READ THIS.

Seriously.

It will help. ...more

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Nov 11, 2015 Tanya Marlow rated it really liked it

Shelves: 2015, non-fiction

It’s written by a psychiatrist. He makes clear that he is talking about the kind of depression that is ‘stress-related’ (as opposed to bipolar or other types of depression which are part of a person’s chemical make-up), which is to say that it is caused by overloading the system repeatedly until a fuse blows. This is why, he argues, depression affects the strong, not the weak – for it is they who constantly take on the burdens of others as well as themselves, until their body snaps and they dev ...more

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May 02, 2013 Meowbie rated it did not like it · review of another edition

[Note: This is a review of the audiobook version.]

There are very few audiobooks that I ever fail to complete, but Tim Cantopher's "Depressive Illness" has set a new bar for me. I lay the blame equally at the feet of the author and the narrator. As other reviewers have mentioned, Lynsey Frost is a strange and inappropriate choice. Her tone is patronising, cloyingly familiar and just plain infuriating. For some reason, the audiobook version altered the text to be in the third person ("Dr. Cantophe ...more

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Mar 18, 2016 Laura Macdonald rated it liked it

I'm in two minds about this book. On the one hand I found it a light, readable, humorous and insightful summary of a serious condition and to that end I enjoyed it and took some useful ideas from it. However, I also have issues: it's a slim volume and clearly not intended to be an in-depth analysis, but perhaps it was just too short; the author is a psychiatrist, but to me it seemed too much faith in psychiatry and drugs (then again, having recently read Cracked: Why Psychiatry is Doing More Har ...more

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Oct 08, 2016 Sarah-Jayne Windridge-France rated it it was amazing

For anyone suffering from stress or depression THIS is the book to read.

I was fortunate to have been recommended this book by a good friend who himself has suffered from clinical depression and who knows me well.

Not only does this book explain that clinical depression is a very real, physical condition, but it gave me a very clear understanding and offered a number of techniques in which to treat it and prevent it from happening again.

I'm still struggling, but with the help of this book and som ...more

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Nov 13, 2013 Craig rated it it was amazing

When I started reading this, I really just wanted to find out a little more about the subject, and now having read it, I'd have to say it was truly illuminating and a really interesting and informative read. It really made sense and it made common sense a key theme throughout. The surrounding issues and common pitfalls are described in such a way to make the reader understand that these are commonly faced by large numbers of sufferers. In this sense, it felt to me that this was a most sensible a ...more

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Sep 05, 2012 Phill Arneaud rated it really liked it

For anyone suffering depression this is a good read, you will begin to recognise all the symptoms as if the book was written about you!
If you have suffered depression this is a difficult read. Some sections are hard going but stick with and all will become clear, The Curse Of The Strong.......will make sense, you're not a failure (right now you think you are) in fact, as the book points out, you are very strong you just need to learn how to strike the work life balance and learn to say no to ot ...more

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Feb 10, 2016 Mark Haberfield rated it it was amazing

I have suffered from depression for at least four years and really related to this book which was recommended by my doctor. I saw how I had been pulled into this mess and learned a lot about the science and psychology. I'm still trying to find the route out that works for me. I believe that everyone who has depression or knows someone else who does should read this book.

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Mar 26, 2017 Eloise McCrohan rated it liked it · review of another edition

Strangely enough, this is a book I didn't mind reading. I DESPISE books about mental diseases, or self-motivation, or getting through life in general, but this one was a good read. It's a book that can give hope. When I first started reading this, I was in a bad way, and found some solace in the hopeful message that Tim Cantopher drills into your brain by the time you've finished the last page.

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