The Elephant of Surprise

Hap and Leonard #12

by Joe R. Lansdale

Hap and Leonard are an unlikely pair--Hap, a self-proclaimed white trash rebel, and Leonard--a tough-as-nails Black, gay, Vietnam vet and Republican--but they're the closest friend either of them has in the world.
After years of crime-solving companionship, something's changed: Hap, recently married to their P.I. boss, Brett, is now a family man. Amidst the worst flood East Texas has seen in years, the two run across a woman who's had her tongue nearly cut out, pursued by a heavily armed pair of goons. Though she can't talk much, on account of the tongue, it turns out the girl survived a mob hit, and the boss has come to clean up the mess.
On a chase that blows even the East Texas swampgrass back, Hap and Leonard must save the girl, and vanquish her foes, before the foes get them first. With a new case to solve, and a brand-new challenge to their relationship, will Hap and Leonard's friendship survive? Will Hap and Leonard survive?
The Elephant of Surprise is rich with Lansdale's trademark humor, whip-smart dialogue, and plenty of ass-kicking adventures.

Genres: Crime, Mystery, Fiction, Thriller, Noir, Audiobook, Mystery Thriller

245 pages, Hardcover

First published March 19, 2019

About the author

Champion Mojo Storyteller Joe R. Lansdale is the author of over forty novels and numerous short stories. His work has appeared in national anthologies, magazines, and collections, as well as numerous foreign publications. He has written for comics, television, film, newspapers, and Internet sites. His work has been collected in more than two dozen short-story collections, and he has edited or co-edited over a dozen anthologies. He has received the Edgar Award, eight Bram Stoker Awards, the Horror Writers Association Lifetime Achievement Award, the British Fantasy Award, the Grinzani Cavour Prize for Literature, the Herodotus Historical Fiction Award, the Inkpot Award for Contributions to Science Fiction and Fantasy, and many others. His novella Bubba Ho-Tep was adapted to film by Don Coscarelli, starring Bruce Campbell and Ossie Davis. His story "Incident On and Off a Mountain Road" was adapted to film for Showtime's "Masters of Horror," and he adapted his short story "Christmas with the Dead" to film hisownself. The film adaptation of his novel Cold in July was nominated for the Grand Jury Prize at the Sundance Film Festival, and the Sundance Channel has adapted his Hap & Leonard novels for television.

He is currently co-producing several films, among them The Bottoms, based on his Edgar Award-winning novel, with Bill Paxton and Brad Wyman, and The Drive-In, with Greg Nicotero. He is Writer In Residence at Stephen F. Austin State University, and is the founder of the martial arts system Shen Chuan: Martial Science and its affiliate, Shen Chuan Family System. He is a member of both the United States and International Martial Arts Halls of Fame. He lives in Nacogdoches, Texas with his wife, dog, and two cats.

Reviews

[Maureen · Rating 3 out of 5]

*3.5 stars *

East Texas private eyes, Hap and Leonard, seem to end up in trouble, even when they’re not looking for it.

Whilst driving through an apocalyptic storm, they literally run into a young woman with her tongue half severed and a SUV full of bad guys on her tail. She is a witness that the local mob want silenced at any costs. Trapped in the local sheriff’s office as the waters rise the duo will need all their wits and a whole load of ammunition to keep her and themselves alive.

The novel has relentless action, whip-smart wisecracks, yet with a hint of something quietly poetic. For all their front, Hap and Leonard, as heroes, are distinctly human, aware of their mortality and that of the goons they take down. A bit of a stretch at times, but still enjoyable.

[Karl · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a advanced reading copy / Uncorrected proof On Sale March 19, 2019.

I purchased this book from a bookstore.

With “Elephant of Surprise” Joe R. Lansdale begins this new adventure of Hap and Leonard with the detective pair enduring a drive through a wild storm which is wreaking havoc in East Texas. Hap and Leonard see a young albino woman stumble into the road in their path where she collapses. A young woman they soon discover has her tongue half cut out and two men chasing her, intent on finishing the job, at her heels.

The book is more relentless than previous outings in the series, and the action moves at a constant high energy clip. We get multiple car chases and shoot-outs. The inevitable confrontation with the head bad guy, a verbose and pleased with himself character, as the best evil Bond villains ever are.

The book is a fast read with all of Lansdale’s trademark humor and recurring characters.

Read em in order:

"Savage Season" 1990
"Mucho Mojo" 1994
"The Two-Bear Mambo" 1995
"Bad Chili" 1997
"Rumble Tumble" 1998
"Veil's Visit" 1999
"Captains Outrageous" 2001
"Vanilla Ride" 2009
"Devil Red" 2011
"Hyenas" 2011
"Dead Aim" 2013
"Briar Patch Boogie" 2016
"Hoodoo Harry" 2016
"Hap and Leonard" 2016
"Honky Tonk Samurai" 2016
"Coco Butternut" 2017
"Blood and Lemonade" 2017
"Cold Cotton" 2017
"Rusty Puppy" 2017
"Jackrabbit Smile" 2018
"The Elephant of Surprise" 2019

[Dave Edmunds · Rating 4 out of 5]

"It's East Texas, baby. We always have storms."

Initial Thoughts

Getting sick of these Hap and Leonard reviews yet? Well never fear as this is the last one you'll get from me...unless Mr Joe R. Lansdale writes another installment. Fingers crossed because I love them. But I guess you'd worked that one out already with this being the twelfth in a bloody fantastic series.

See, there's nobody out there that writes this hilarious brand of East Texas crime noir quite like 'Champion' Joe. Over the course of this series, he has created the most likeable duo in fiction in Hap Collins and Leonard Pine. In a morally grey world the pair walk the line between good and evil, often in hilarious fashion. And that is what is so great about it. Without the humour proceedings would soon get dull, with the constant and pretty extreme violence. But Lansdale balances things perfectly, masterfully, sensationally. What I'm trying to say is that it's really, really good.

"Okay. This plan of yours is going to be back to our usual elephant of surprise, I suppose?"

"I don't know how large an elephant it's going to be, but if you mean half-assed but energetic, then yeah."

Anyway, this is the last novel in the series. So I'll be reading this one with a tear in my eye, as well as a smile on my face. Yes I'm back with my best friends but for the last time in... Elephant of Surprise. Yes my best friends are fictional characters. What you going to do about it?

The Story

This one starts with a storm... literally. Hap and Leonard are driving back to Laborde when they're caught in a torrential downpour. But that's only the start of the trouble for them. Isn't that always the case?

It's not long before they are dragged into another life and death situation when they stumble across a young woman who's almost had her tongue hacked out of her mouth. Yes it's hanging on by a thread and there's a bunch of villains in pursuit intending to finish the job they started.



But it's not like Mr Collins and Mr Pine to leave a damsel in distress and this is no exception. These villains have bitten off more they can chew and a whole world of hurt is in store for them. But father time is catching up with our favourite pair and will this be their final rodeo? Only one way to find out!

"Hope in one hand, shit in the other, see which one fills up first."

Final Thoughts

So this is the end of the line for Hap and Leonard. At least for now it is. But if this was the final chapter for East Texas' finest, would it be a worthy one? Well that is the million dollar question.

The writing in this one is definitely high quality, with some fantastic description. Particularly of the storm. I was in Florida myself when hurricane Urma struck and this book brought all those memories flooding back. Cheers Joe! But the way the weather presented a metaphor for the havoc being wrecked by the criminals in this one did not go unnoticed.

But the actual scope of the novel did not feel as fresh or innovative as previous novels. It was relentless and very action heavy. As a result it did lack the heart that made some of the best novels in the collection so damn good. I certainly wouldn't put it in the top five.

Still a Hap and Leonard novel is always entertaining and some parts were absolutely hilarious. Joe Lansdale is an amazing storyteller. But for me I want this series to end with an absolute bang and I'd be gutted if this really was the end. So this one is from the heart. I'm on my hands and knees here. Please Joe, give me one more novel!

And while I'm down here, thanks for reading and... cheers!

[Dan Schwent · Rating 3 out of 5]

When Hap and Leonard run across a mutilated albino girl on a dark and stormy night, they soon have some unsavory characters on their asses like a dog on a pile of cat shit. Can Hap and Leonard save the day, even as LaBorde becomes a flooded ghost town?

The baddest mother fuckers in east Texas are back and balls deep in trouble, like always. I was actually on the fence about reading this one. The last couple Hap and Leonard books haven't been up to snuff, in my opinion. However, I'm pleased to say this one had a little more substance to it.

In The Elephant of Surprise, Hap and Leonard go up against the Dixie Mafia, a hurricane, and old age to protect Nikki, an albino girl who knows too much. Helping them is Manny, the take no shit lady cop minding the LaBorde PD while Marvin Hanson is out of town.

There's a sense of desperation in The Elephant of Surprise that has been lacking in Hap and Leonard's adventures lately. There aren't as many quips and the guys aren't as confident as they once were. A martial artist gets the better of them and Hap even misses some shots. While Hap and Leonard never pull a Danny Glover and say "I'm too old for this shit," the subtext is flashing like a neon sign. Without spoiling too much, there are a couple siege-like scenes that drive home the fact that while Hap and Leonard are still capable, they aren't the super heroes they once were.

Joe Lansdale's writing is as great as it ever was with colorful similes and great dialogue. While I've found some of his recent works not quite up to snuff, I've never felt that way about his writing. I'd read a cookbook if Joe wrote it.

The Elephant of Surprise was a notch better than the previous two or three Hap and Leonard books. I hope for the sake of the characters and the reputation of the series, this is the last one. 3.5 out of 5 stars.

[Berengaria · Rating 5 out of 5]

5 rockin' stars

short review for busy readers: The (currently) final book in the Hap & Leonard series is one of the very best of the bunch!

in detail:
What we get this time: non-stop action, in-plot commentary on global warming and how it's ripping the stuffings out of East Texas, fantastic shoot-outs, high speed car-bus-garbage truck-tank chases (!!!), one mean hurricane and a very nice body count. Woo-eeee!

"Who is your favourite author?" has always been a difficult question and I used to say that I didn't have one. But now I think I do, and it's Joe R Lansdale.

His stuff isn't perfect nor is it highbrow, but he's damn good at what he does and can rightly be considered a Texan national treasure.

When he began writing this series back in in 1990, I'm sure he never thought he'd be still writing it some 30 years later. But that's how it goes when you've got a winner people love. You're married to it, for better or for worse. And boy, do we love Hap & Leonard.

I read the entire series for the GR Serial Challenge 2024 and - for what it's worth - here are my faves of the series.

Savage Season (Book 1)
Bad Chili (Book 4)
Vanilla Ride (Book 7)
Rusty Puppy (Book 10)
The Elephant of Surprise (Book 12)

Now I get to track down the Hap & Leonard novellas and Lansdale's other series and standalone books. What fun!

[Howard · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 Stars for The Elephant of Surprise: Hap and Leonard, Book 12 (audiobook) by Joe R. Lansdale read by Christopher Ryan Grant.

Hap and Leonard find themselves in the worst storm to hit East Texas that they can remember. And in the storm they run across a young woman who’s spitting blood. It looks like someone has tried to cut her tongue out. So they rush her to the hospital, good thing that the hospital has a backup generator. Unfortunately the men that did that to her aren’t done with her yet. And the unlikely duo are going to have to risk their lives to help keep her safe.

[Bill · Rating 3 out of 5]

Joe R Lansdale has penned quite a few adventures featuring Hap Collins & Leonard Pine. This unlikely crime solving duo have made me laugh a lot over the years, but I've missed their last few stories, so it was time to check them out....in no particular order.
The Elephant of Surprise is a fairly simplistic tale. Amidst huge floods in East Texas our heroic duo stumble upon a woman who has survived a mob hit. They care for her & end up on the run from the bad guys, & that's pretty much the whole plot.
Lansdale never seems to progress the story & even the humour is lacking its usual sparkle. It's a good read, but not up to his usual high standard.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well that was a fun shoot first-ask questions later type of read! They always make me grin and giggle.

This is my first Hap and Leonard read. Yup. I jumped right in at book 13. But I used to read Mr. Lansdale way back when in my mystery reading days. I loved his storytelling, but I just fell away from the genre for awhile. His name popped up again last week, so *shrugs* I said why the hell not. :) Hap and Leonard are two well drawn characters, who move on the page with charm, humor, and history. And boy-o-boy do they know their way around a shootout.

Our tale jumps right in! Into an East Texas storm, flood, and situation. A situation involving armed thugs, murder, and a witness on the run. I have a feeling Hap and Leonard run into these types of situations a lot. Can they save the day? Or has their luck run out? They have each other’s backs no matter what though. I can feel that. Between the blood splatters and bullets, sit two friends with a warm, true love for each other.

“What could go wrong?”
“Remember, this is us.”
“Yeah,” I said. “That means anything could go wrong.”
“I’ll wait on you.”
“Don’t wait any longer than we’ve talked about waiting. You go when you should go. Don’t worry about me.”
“How can I not? You’re so incompetent.”
“Yeah, but I have my charm to fall back on.”
“You better have that pistol instead of your charm.”


Such a quiet way to say—don’t you die on me! Mr. Lansdale has a way with words actually. Simple, easy words with a down-home feel to them that say it all. I can’t tell you how many lines I giggled over or jotted down. Like…“He had a look on his face like someone had borrowed his dick and forgotten to give it back.” Or “The place was quiet and eerie as a politician’s soul.”

This one I’m still pondering over….“Leonard gave her a look that could have made a bear call a taxi.” –Haha…

The Elephant of Surprise is a read with giddy up. The fun kicks off at page one and keeps going til the end! I can’t wait to find out more about Hap and Leonard. I’m off to find book one.

Joe R. Lansdale is a voice I’m glad I stumbled across again.

[Luca Masera · Rating 3 out of 5]

Mah... un Lansdale decisamente in tono minore per una delle storie di Hap & Leonard più scariche mai lette: trama semplice ai limiti della banalità, nessun lampo di genio a cui ci ha sempre abituato e cattivi oltremodo insipidi.

Non so se è iniziato il declino (inevitabile alla lunga?) per una delle coppie più amate della letteratura crime americana o se si tratta di una semplice battuta di arresto (a dire il vero non sarebbe la prima): sta di fatto che si prende tre stelline e non due, solo per una questione di affetto.

[Come Musica · Rating 4 out of 5]

È la tredicesima storia di Hap&Leonard, ma per me è la prima che leggo.

Di Lansdale avevo letto Io sono Dot e Paradise Sky ed entrambi mi erano piaciuti molto.

Veniamo all’ultima avventura di Hap&Leonard. I due soccorrono una ragazza asiatica albina a cui avevano provato a tagliare la lingua. Non appena la ragazza comincia a riprendersi, scoprono che si chiama Nikki, diminutivo di Nicole.

Tanti i protagonisti che si intrecciano in questa storia torbida, sotto una pioggia battente e un vento impetuoso che allentano la presa solo alla fine del racconto, per lasciar spazio a un cielo terso.

Il tempo atmosferico è una metafora delle lotte che si svolgono dentro la coscienza di Hap, in bilico tra il fare la cosa giusta oppure no: “Ha cercato di uccidere te, Leonard e Nikki, mi dissi. E ti ammazzerebbe anche ora, se credesse di averne la possibilità. Potrebbe essere stato lui a uccidere quella povera donna, in ospedale, e certamente ha contribuito a renderlo possibile. Sarà anche un essere umano, ma non sa che cosa sia l’umanità.
Me lo ripetei mentre continuavo a guardare attraverso il mirino, l’essenza stessa di quel che c’è di piú inumano, per un uomo con la mia mentalità. Rimasi sorpreso quando il colpo partí. Il rinculo mi colse alla sprovvista, un po’ come quando un proctologo, dopo averlo cosparso di vasellina, ti infila un dito su per le chiappe.
Avevo mancato il bersaglio. Evidentemente avevo sbagliato a calcolare gli effetti della pioggia e del vento.”


Al di là delle scene di azione mozzafiato, che mi sono molto piaciute, mi è sembrato un ottimo dipinto delle zone d’ombra che abitano l’animo umano. E anche questo periodo mi è sembrato un’ottima metafora delle crepe che si creano dentro di noi e che a lungo andare fanno crollare la sovrastruttura che ci siamo costruiti nel tempo per proteggerci o per paura di dire a noi stessi ciò che veramente siamo: “Ero passato da un sonno profondo alla veglia in pochi istanti, e quelli del vento e della pioggia sembravano gli unici rumori al mondo. Mi alzai, accesi la torcia e scoprii che vicino alla porta d’ingresso c’era una crepa dalla quale entrava l’acqua. Il soffitto era rimasto a lungo esposto alle intemperie, e la pioggia filtrava e scorreva sul pavimento, che si era leggermente gonfiato e puzzava di muffa [.].
Non avevo visto quella crepa mentre mi trovavo al piano superiore e in quel momento mi sembrava una scoperta importante, come se stessi passando in rassegna un immobile che ero intenzionato ad acquistare. Ne dedussi che l’acqua doveva essere filtrata dal tetto scorrendo sui lati della doccia, fino ad aprirsi un varco nel soffitto. Ancora pochi anni e tutta quella parte dell’immobile sarebbe crollata.”


In sintesi, sul mio canale Telegram
https://t.me/ventaglip/2973

[Robyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

THE ELEPHANT OF SURPRISE
Joe R. Lansdale

So, LATE AGAIN.. how have I missed this series? It is even set in Texas, specifically East Texas which is in fact almost a country unto itself. Everything that Hap and Leonard say about that area is absolutely true.

I really enjoyed the book, it was a bit of a macho fluff read (that would be chick lit except written as macho lit for guys) instead of looking through eyelashes, these guys peer through the windshield of their tiny clown car and drive it at high speeds and spins. The action is nonstop and a mile a minute while the conversations are full of quips, taunts, and macho sarcasm. Hell, even their descriptions are ironic, one is white and liberal and the other is Black, gay, and conservative. Just a ton of fun.

4 stars

Happy Reading!

[Alfonso D'agostino · Rating 4 out of 5]

(ho una pila di libri su cui sono indietro con le recensioni. Interessa il giusto, lo so, ma è una di quelle frasi motivanti che dovrebbero spingermi a muovere il cu… le dita sulla tastiera. Bòn.)

E nel frattempo mi sono goduto Elefante a sorpresa dell’ormai mitologico Joe R. Lansdale: un’indagine di Hap & Leonard strilla il sottotitolo per accaparrarsi l’interesse del potenziale lettore, cosa che – per inciso – con il sottoscritto ha funzionato benissimo. Hap & Leonard troneggiano nell’Olimpio delle migliori (e più improbabili) coppie investigatrici degli ultimi venti anni, quindi la compulsione prendilo.-e-portalo-SUBITO-alla-cassa è immediatamente esecutiva.

Con Lansdale sai cosa aspettarti e raramente resti deluso: in questo nuovo capitolo della loro saga, Hap & Leonard non vengono ingaggiati ma inciampano letteralmente in una storia da brividi con tanto di ragazza salvata un attimo prima che qualcuno provveda a metterla a tacere (letteralmente: è previso un secco taglio della lingua). Seguono sparatorie, fughe, preoccupazioni familiari e un po’ di cadaveri di cattivi, in perfetto stile Lansdale, il tutto annegato in giornate di tempesta-fulmini-saette che – considerate le ultime settimane milanesi, più bagnate che mai – aiutava nell’immedesimazione.

Un punto che mi ha fatto sorridere un bel po’: Hap & Leonard appaiono lievemente appesantiti dal tempo che passa, si pongono alcuni scrupoli che in precedenza non sarebbero stati loro e sono persino un po’ più attenti nella dieta. E’ quel momento in cui ti rendi conto che il tuo personaggio sta invecchiando, ed è giusto così: o forse no, nell’eterno dilemma se la letteratura (anche quella di genere) debba mantenere in questo un aggancio con la realtà o se il tuo eroe possa restare sempre giovane e bello (semicit.). Questione di gusti: a me, due personaggi così umani che mi fanno compagnia mentre i miei peli della barba diventano bianchi davanti allo specchio, fanno la giusta tenerezza. E un po’ di compagnia.

[Abibliofob · Rating 5 out of 5]

I do love this series, there is some kind of anti hero thing going on. Hap and Leonard are getting older and slower but that will not stop them from helping out. Lansdale is a master at descriping a society that is not common today. sometimes I marvel at this attitude people have in his books actually still excists. This is one book series where they got it right when they made the tv show, sadly discontinued. I strongly recommend this series.

[Lara Di Iorio · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 🌟🌟🌟✨

[Roger · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Elephant of Surprise was a perfect Sunday afternoon read. Joe Lansdale returns to his series characters Hap and Leonard, in a novel that is essentially one long sequence of chases, fights and close calls. The story never stops moving or being exciting-not every author can pull off this type of book but Joe can. As always, Constant Reader, I'm going to warn you that if have not read any of Hap and Leonard's previous adventures, you need to start with the first book, Savage Season, and go from there. Skipping around in this series can only lessen your enjoyment.

[Tiger · Rating 2 out of 5]

Hap & Leonard try to help a young woman who has had her tongue nearly cut off as she is doggedly pursued by some very bad people. I enjoy most of Joe Lansdale's work, especially his Hap & Leonard series but this book felt very flat to me. The usual hijinks between the 2 main characters was very vanilla, the other usual background characters were barely seen and the action sequences seemed at times to be just page filling gun play.

[Lynn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thrilling, funny and over-the-top as always. Less focus on Leonard than I prefer, but wtf.....still good.

[Justin Partridge · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I was all right until we went through the door into the receptionist’s room, and then the fear hit me. My legs trembled and my mouth felt dry and tasted of copper. Me and Leonard had been in plenty of tight spots, but we were braver when we were together. At least I was. Leonard probably did okay either way.

I think what was scaring. Me more than my own possible demise was that my brother Leonard might be killed. It had been close a few times, for both of us, but if something happened to him, no matter how much I loved Brett and my daughter, Chance, I had to wonder if I could make it. It would be worse than losing an arm. Family breathes for each other, and close family breathes as one.”

Me, an absolute goober, oh the PI agency stuff, it’s gonna make these so basic and conventionally laid out. They are just gonna be mysteries now.

JRL, the total fucking galaxy brain HE is, hey, this one is a Rio Bravo and you’re gonna read it in like 18 hours because it works that well. AND THEN I DAMN WELL DID. Books are fucking great y’all. This one especially.

Because it’s literally just Rio Bravo, or Assault on Precinct 13 if you’d rather. A ghostly beautiful witness to a would-be-“shot caller’s” sudden and merciless crime drives her into the biggest storm in LaBorde’s history. Right into the orbit of our hard-luck-heroes, kicking off basically a bullet train of a story that could have been downloaded directly into my brain, I read it so fast.

And it was absolutely worth it! It rules! Manny is amazing! It’s basically ALL action and character beats. Beautifully packaged in this user friendly but long time reader rich package! It’s East Texas Reacher! And now makes me even MORE interested in Bill and Judy Crider! This one is dedicated to the pair of them and I’m guessing a lot of its tonality and drive and readability branches from there.

One more thing I think I should say about these, that give them the edge over usual “dad books”, all the villains are like The System Failed or bad actors taking advantage of these failed systems to try and set up themselves above their class. I find that VERY interesting. Like sure, there are some crime elements there throughout, but really it’s always like corrupt(racist) cops, corrupt(racist) judges, crooked(racist too) lawyers and beat cops. That’s really neat to see in a larger market thing and that it further is seemingly a conscious choice on the part of Lansdale. It’s very Westlake/Parker, which they already share a lot of energy with, it’s awesome.

I appreciate too JRL not being like weirdly too proud or boneheaded about evolving Leonard’s conservatism. Obvi a lot of unconscionable shit was going down in 2019 and it means a lot to me that Lansdale would interrogate his own characters’ viewpoints ON that shit and then turning toward making it text in the shifting process of the series. It makes me respect and love him a lot more. and even more hilarious knowing that there were surely people that were like “WUT?!”; those same tools that don’t understand that the boys is making fun of them and shifting your mind and views as the world shifts around you is like…the whole fucking point. Leonard would put all them on their asses (while I would also think he’s dead fucking wrong about…most stuff; WILD HOW THAT WORKS HUH?! Maybe not EVERY protagonist is this series of fucking checklists framed across a hot person that makes the title pop on booktok)

Fuck now I’m SOUNDING like Leonard. Bless my heart. But seriously, get on these. I’m really happy I did. I think they have a lot more going for them than just fun plots and really well written action.

[Jiří Pavlovský · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pokud jsem o minulých knihách ze série psal, že jsou to série fajn dialogů občas přerušená náhlým záchvatem násilí, tak tady to neplatí. Tohle je prostě akční jízda. Od prvních stránek až do posledních, téměř bez oddychu. Při jízdě deštěm narazí Hap a Leonard na holku s téměř uřízlým jazykem. A od té chvíle jdou po nich zabijáci, kteří se nezastaví před ničím. Což je o to horší, že se celé město ocitlo uprostřed jedné z nejhorších bouří za poslední roky, ulice jsou pod vodou a kolem se prohání tornáda. To není zrovna nejlepší okamžik na souboj s mafií a dvojicí zabijáků, kteří vypadají, jako by se Terminátor spároval s Brucem Lee.
Platí pořád to, že Lansdale je skvělý vypravěč a rozhodně palec vzhůru, že se šoupnul někam jinam, že si střihl rychlejší akci. Na druhou stranu, i tady platí, že je celkový příběh dost jednoduchý a nemůžete od něj čekat žádný překvapivý zvrat. Od začátku jsou rozdané karty a pak už se střílí, utíká, umírá a ve volných chvílích konverzuje. To všechno ve stylovém Lansdaleově podání. Takže proč ne.

[Frank · Rating 4 out of 5]

Well, I finally made it to the last Hap and Leonard novel (so far, I hope). This has been quite a ride with two of my favorites from fiction: Hap, a liberal white-trash former hippie, and Leonard, a black gay conservative Vietnam veteran. The two of them are closer than brothers.

This book really was a pretty straight forward action-packed thrill ride with not much of a plot. But hey, it is Hap and Leonard so I'm not complaining. It takes place during an apocalyptic storm in East Texas. Our heroes are driving through the rain when a woman darts in their path...a woman who has half her tongue cut out and is looking for help. And right behind her are some thugs in a black SUV. The woman is also an Asian albino and rather unique for East Texas. Hap and Leonard get her to the hospital but this is not the safest place for her. She is being pursued by some of the Dixie Mafia but why? Of course Hap and Leonard become her protector along with Manny from the police force. (Hanson and Pookie are out of town during all this). So are our boys triumphant in their efforts? Well, it is Hap and Leonard!

Like I said, this one didn't have too much of a plot with no twists to the story. And the humor wasn't as pointed and crass as in some of the previous novels, but hey, it still held my interest and kept me turning the pages. Now my question is: when and if will Lansdale publish the next in the series? Hopefully, he has something in the works.

[Ian · Rating 5 out of 5]

New Hap & Leonard? Yes please!
Just as good as always, Lansdales lyrical, comedic dialogue and pinpoint description makes this an absolue must for fans of the eponymous duo. The only problem I had with this book is that I wanted it to be longer. Not that there's anything wrong with the pacing, just that I wanted more.
The whole thing rattles along at an absolutely cracking pace from when our two heroes rescue a young albino girl escaping from torture, through a p[olice station siege, escape and final showdown.
Just brilliant!

[Ben Boulden · Rating 4 out of 5]

An action-packed addition to the Hap & Leonard series that will appeal to pretty much anyone who enjoys a fast-paced and humor laced crime story.

[Metagion · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful book by Mr. Lansdale! Hap and Leonard are back at it in this thriller in which no good deed goes unpunished...

When one of the worst storms ever to hit East Texas arrives, so does trouble, in the form of a thin Asian girl who was roughed up bad, and a deadly hit team chasing her through the rain and wind only to cross paths with our heroes, just trying to get home... Or are they the next target? Read it and enjoy!

[Gary L. Carter · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hap and Leonard - The Odd Couple of Noir

Joe R Lansdale is master wordsmith and story teller. His characters are always believable whether they are heroes or villains. His black humor and the banter between Hap and Leonard show much love and respect they hold for each other. I have been riding with them from the first book and I”ll be their at the end. It has been a good ride.

[Donald · Rating 4 out of 5]

“That’s a lot of damn water.” -Noah

“Me and Leonard got something better than the element of surprise, we got the elephant of surprise, and you can bet that’s some serious business.” -Hap Collins

These two quotes had me smiling before page one! And of course, there were more smiles to come! I mean, it's Hap and Leonard, for Christ's sake!

Nice, fast, action-packed read! Basically, H & L find an albino, Asian girl out on the road in the middle of a storm. With men trying to kill her. H & L grab her, take off, and the story roars into life! Basically, it's H & L trying to keep the gal alive, and Wilson Keith, the Dixie Mafia, "the big black guy", and "Kung Fu Bobby" trying to kill her. All while an apocalyptic storm slams the little Texas town of LaBorde. Just another day for Hap and Leonard!

Fun to read, as always! My only complaint is that I read it too fast! Damn it all! When the hell does Hap and Leonard #13 come out???

[Monica · Rating 2 out of 5]

While I still really enjoy Hap and Leonard as characters, I found this book seriously lacking in the plot department. There was too much action, too much verbosity, and Hap keeps tripping over his conscience in fairly dimwitted ways. The villains and other minor characters were unmemorable. It was a harmless way to spend a couple of hours, but not up to his usual standard.

[Michael · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fun anomaly in the Hap and Leonard series, being essentially one extended chase/action sequence. The sharp dialogue is still present, but it's definitely got a more propulsive feel than the other books, which tend to be a little more leisurely, though still action-packed.

[Craig Childs · Rating 4 out of 5]

"I no longer wonder why people do horrible things. I just know a lot of them do."

Driving home during a thunderstorm one night, Hap Collins and Leonard Pine see a young Asian albino girl running across the road. Her tongue has been cut out, and two mob hitmen are pursuing her to finish their torture and mutilation. Never ones to avoid a fight or leave a pretty girl in danger, they load her into the backseat of Hap's car, pull their guns out of the glove compartment, and commence once again to being a two-man wrecking crew against the Dixie Mafia.

While I was disappointed in the last novel, Jackrabbit Smile, I am happy to report this 12th entry in the series was much improved. It has a different tone than the rest of the books. Lansdale drops his audience into the middle of an ongoing chase scene on page 1, and the action continues essentially non-stop until the final blood-soaked chapter. There are two brief respites in which readers are filled in on backstory, but this feels more like a Blake Crouch suspense thriller than a traditional Hap and Leonard novel.

In a sense, this format addresses my complaints about Jackrabbit. The mysterious woman, who turns out to be the mistress of a dead mobster who has agreed to turn state's evidence, quickly drew me into the story. A new series villain dubbed Kung Fu Bobby is as deadly and capable as our heroes, and he puts the final outcome of survivability in doubt, particularly for the minor characters. (May Kung Fu Bobby live to return in future sequels, hopefully to do battle against Vanilla Ride!)

It was also fun to see the return of the potty-mouthed Reba, aka Four Hundred Year Old Vampire Midget. She got in a couple of great zingers, especially her take on albinism: "That little white girl ain't something outghta be messed with. White people get you killed. Real white one like that, she's nothing but trouble."

This book features some of the author's strongest action scenes. The entire story takes place over 3-4 days against the backdrop of a coastal hurricane, increasing the natural risk of hazards to both good guys and villains, and isolating our characters from their usual network of friends and law enforcement partners. Lansdale has used this plot device before, notably in The Big Blow and Two-Bear Mambo, but he still excels at doing it effectively.

The downside is the frantic pace leaves no time for the usual banter and camaraderie. When the series started in 1990, much of the internal tension was derived from Hap and Leonard's divergent political views. The first book Savage Season dealt with leftover feelings about the Vietnam War. The next two books dealt with race relations and the welfare state in the early 1990's.

I wish the series would get back to discussing modern politics filtered through the prism of East Texas morality. The could be a lot to explore. How does gay, black, Republican Leonard feel about the national anthem protests in the NFL? How does Marvin feel about accusations of police brutality all over the country? How has illegal immigration in Texas affected Hap?

I was also left still wanting to know more about other series regulars--how does Chase like living so close to Hap and Brett? How are things going in Leonard's rejuvenated love life (this may be the first time one of his partners has survived more than two books in a row)? Whatever happened to the pit bull Rex which Leonard rescued in the last book?

I guess I'll have to tune in next year to find out.

[Bookreporter.com Mystery & Thriller · Rating 5 out of 5]

Joe R. Lansdale continues to roll right along, to the dark delight of those who have enjoyed his work in one or all of the five decades or so in which he has been plying his trade. The fine television adaptation of his Hap and Leonard novels has added to his appreciative audience, but as good as that series is, it does not quite capture the magic of the books. This is demonstrated by THE ELEPHANT OF SURPRISE, the latest in the Hap and Leonard literary canon and one of the best.

Hap Collins and Leonard Pine are the oddest of couples, a pair of seemingly mismatched friends who are closer than brothers. Lansdale wastes no time getting things started in THE ELEPHANT OF SURPRISE and never puts his foot on the brake. Things begin with Hap and Leonard driving through a torrential rainstorm that has hit East Texas like a biblical flood. They find a young woman who has been grievously injured in the middle of nowhere and stop to lend assistance, finding that her tongue has been partially severed. No sooner do they ascertain that she is in need of immediate assistance than two goons --- almost as mismatched, in their own way, as our protagonists --- arrive on the scene to finish the job they started.

Of course, Hap and Leonard don’t see things as ending quite that way and thus begin a cat-and-mouse chase through rural East Texas that pretty much continues throughout the book. The rains, flooding and tornadoes that take place make the situation even more interesting, as do a couple of double-crosses, surprises, and the unearthing of the whys and wherefores as to the motives of the two extremely dangerous individuals who apparently can be slowed but cannot be stopped in their pursuit of the injured woman.

The story comes out haltingly --- communicating with a partially severed tongue is somewhat difficult --- but it develops that Hap and Leonard have put themselves in the path of an extremely dangerous organization with seemingly unlimited resources. However, the boys are at their best when they appear to be outnumbered and outgunned, and there doesn’t seem to be any quit in them, as they say in East Texas. If THE ELEPHANT OF SURPRISE is their last ride, they’re surely going to go out standing up.

Most of the book’s fun is the journey, from the roadside to the police station and ultimately to a long-out-of-business bowling alley where Hap, Leonard and a friend make what is the last stand…for one side, anyway. Leonard’s first-person narrative is also, as one might expect, full of the similes and metaphors for which we all come early and stay late. That said, there are indications that this may be the last outing for the duo, though at least one unresolved element is still riding off into the sunset at the end of the story.

If this is the last of the series, Lansdale is ending on a proverbial high note. If this is not the final word, then we all can rejoice. Either way, THE ELEPHANT OF SURPRISE comes strongly recommended, and that is no surprise at all.

Reviewed by Joe Hartlaub

[Elvio Mac · Rating 3 out of 5]

Hap e Leonard sono finiti nei guai, tanto per cambiare la loro incapacità di lasciar perdere un torto o un ingiustizia ai danni di qualcuno è più forte di qualsiasi opposizione che incontrano. E' quello che succede durante una serata di allagamenti vento e precipitazioni meteo eccezionali. Mentre percorrono una strada colpita dal maltempo vedono di sfuggita una persona che cerca di attirare la loro attenzione, si fermano per verificare e trovano una ragazza minuta e albina in condizioni preoccupanti, è spossata e insanguinata, la caricano in auto e la portano in ospedale. Ma qualcuno vuole quella ragazza e la vuole morta, visto che immediatamente vengono inseguiti e gli sparano addosso. Con la solita prontezza di riflessi, i due sfuggono all'imboscata e cercano di capire cosa diavolo sta succedendo. Nel frattempo, le condizioni meteo peggiorano e devastano strade e paesi, la foto di copertina del libro è largamente esplicita. Battute fulminanti, dialoghi irascibili e divertenti, ci sono tutti gli ingredienti del duo più famoso di Lansdale, anche se forse un po' sotto tono rispetto al solito. Tante situazioni già viste del duo, ma non annoiano mai, sono come Bud Spencer e Terence Hill. Ci sono alcune similitudini che nel contesto risultano eccellenti come "La Prius sobbalzò con la grazia di un triciclo che corre sul binario di un treno, oppure "La stazione di polizia era silenziosa e inquietante come l’anima di un uomo politico." e ancora, "La pioggia ci sferzava come una frusta in una nave di schiavi". Quando Hap e Leonard sono in caccia il libro vola via, quando sono in attesa invece suscita meno interesse, ma capisco che per rendere completa una storia, siano necessarie anche parti meno ritmate. Il libro è abbastanza spassoso, dura poco la compagnia con questi funamboli perchè le pagine sono poco più di duecento. Ho trovato alcuni dettagli poco credibili, ma nel contesto del fantastico mondo di Hap e Leonard possono rientrare nel comprensibile. Hap inizia ad avere dei dubbi su come sta conducendo la sua vita, dopo la sua unione con Brett pensa alla famiglia e soprattutto che sta invecchiando, vorrebbe porre un freno alle situazioni rocambolesche. I dolori del passato con tutte le morti che ha vissuto non se ne vanno e cominciano a pesare enormemente. Ha già ucciso e può rifarlo, anzi probabilmente lo troverà fin troppo facile. Hap pensa: tutte quelle stramaledette armi, e tutte le situazioni di merda nelle quali si ficca. Per quante giustificazioni potesse trovare, era e restava un assassino. Aveva superato un confine molto tempo prima, e quando accade non c’è modo di tornare indietro. È questa, la cosa più spaventosa. Leonard invece è meno riflessivo, o forse più giovane e spensierato seppur con un fardello pesante da portare.