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Loving My Actual Neighbor: 7 Practices to Treasure the People Right in Front of You

4.18  ·  Rating details ·  61 ratings  ·  36 reviews
As Christians, we know we are called to love our neighbor. We may even grasp that "neighbor" encompasses more than just the people living next door or down the street. But what we too often don't know is how to begin. How do we love our neighbor? Where do we start? What does this look like in our increasingly isolated world?

Following practices outlined in the first chapter
Paperback, 224 pages
Published April 2nd 2019 by Baker Books
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4.18  · 
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 ·  61 ratings  ·  36 reviews

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Angie Fehl
Jun 12, 2019 rated it it was ok
In this latest installment of her Loving My Actual ______ series, Kuykendall ponders on the question: In an increasingly socially isolating world, how does one go about showing love for one's neighbor. Her use of the word "neighbor", she clarifies, isn't limited to one's literal next door neighbor, but really anyone we come in close proximity to throughout the course of our lives.

The inspiration for this newest book came to Alexandra through her realization that she knew little to nothing of th
Jan 15, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: library
I received this book as an ARC from Baker Books in exchange for an honest review. Opinions and thoughts expressed in this review are completely my own.

There are a lot of members of our community that are in high demand of new Christian books and when I heard about Loving My Actual Neighbor I had to jump at the chance to read it. Alexandra Kuykendall did her research and compiled a well-thought description on what it means to love thy neighbor. The stories expressed throughout the books I believe
Shannon (Mrsreadsbooks)
This is a topic I haven't previously read many books about and it is certainly a topic that everyone can benefit from focusing on. The author shares stories and suggestions throughout the book on how to actually love your neighbor. In this day and age, with everything going on, I think it is extremely important that Christians make a point to connect with those around them and show empathy and compassion. Each chapter contains "Questions of Reflection" at the end, which is something I very much ...more
Karl Dumas
Jun 08, 2019 rated it really liked it
'Treasure' can be a great synonym for 'love'

There are several words in the Greek New Testament that get translated into English as ‘love’. I confuse them often, as probably many other people do also. When this book first came available for review, I decided to pass on it. The cover didn’t jump out and grab my attention, the author, Alexandra Kuykendall, wasn’t familiar to me, and some of the things I read about her other books made me think that this was a book better suited to a female audience
Apr 15, 2019 rated it liked it
Having recently finished another book on the same subject (which I wasn't especially drawn to), I was curious to read  Loving My Actual Neighbor: 7 Practices to Treasure the People Right in Front of You  by Alexandra Kuykendall, an author, podcast co-host, and speaker. Kuykendall organizes her book around seven practices (taken loosely from 2 Peter 1:5-7): holding a posture of humility, asking questions to learn, being quiet to listen, standing in the awkward, accepting what is, lightening up, a ...more
Feb 26, 2019 rated it really liked it
*I received an advanced reader’s copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Author Alexandra Kuykendall asks a seemingly simple question in her fourth book, Loving My Actual Neighbor: how, exactly, do we love our neighbor? It seems simple, but in an increasingly isolated and online world, it is anything but.

When Jesus named the second greatest commandment to “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:38), the common interpretation is that He wasn’t talking about just our literal neighb
Journey FAITH
Apr 16, 2019 rated it really liked it
This newly released book Loving My Actual Neighbor ~ 7 Practices to Treasure the People Right in Front of You by Alexandra Kuykendall has a much-needed message for all of us. This was such a wonderful and helpful read for me. We know as Christians that we are called to love others, but sometimes this can be a struggle. How and what should we do to show love to others? Yes, this book focuses on loving our neighbors and your neighborhood, but the word neighbor is much more than that, it is also an ...more
Tanya Brown
Jun 06, 2019 rated it it was amazing
My Reflections: I chose this particular book because as a family we felt that our neighbourhood was specifically chosen for us to live in, it was actually pretty clear from the start that God wanted us here.
We live in a quirky little back road community with vibrant neighbours and strong community presence. Our family is young while most of my neighbours are retired and enjoying a different life stage. We are homeschoolers so I wanted the kids to be involved in the neighbourhood, I wanted them
Victoria W.
May 16, 2019 rated it really liked it
Honestly, I have a strong interest in books on community. As an introverted geek I love being involved in community but tend to rock the awkward person in the corner or frazzled mom look over coherent person.

In Loving My Actual Neighbor Kuykundell presents 7 practices to help people learn how to embrace the community they naturally encounter in their everyday lives and there's even a chapter that specifically addresses being awkward (talk about a book that speaks to my heart.)

When I read Kuykend
Christen Fox
May 21, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Influenced by the principles outlined in 1 Peter 2, Loving My Actual Neighbor offers the reader practical and encouraging ways to work towards achieving our common goals. This involves: Humbling ourselves before our neighbor, Asking questions about our neighbor to gain insight into their life, Quieting our voice in order to observe & listen, Stepping into awkward situations, conversations, or silence, Accepting the truth and the reality of your relationship with your neighbor, Lightening up ...more
Benjamin Liles
Apr 19, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: my-book-reviews
I often think of ways of how I can show God’s loving care, compassion and mercy towards others. With Alexandra Kuykendall’s Loving My Actual Neighbor, she puts forth seven things she considers worth looking at in dealing with our neighbors. Those things she looks at within the pages of this book are holding a posture of humility, asking questions to learn, being quiet to listen, standing in those times of awkwardness, accepting what is, lightening up, and giving freely.

While I applaud her effo
May 05, 2019 rated it really liked it
"Our neighbors -- the people right in front o us -- are not those we choose, but those we can choose to treasure." (p 21)

Back-to-basics advice that hits home in the hustle and bustle and technological detachment of the 21st century. At the same time it's both commonsense practicality and a refreshing approach to the modern-day dilemma of not just loving our neighbors, but knowing who they are.

The author uses a mix of stories, ideas and practical tips to challenge readers to embrace the concept o
Apr 02, 2019 rated it it was amazing
If you are looking for a practical, Scriptural devotional for your private study time, this is it. If you are looking for a practical, Scriptural study for your small group, this is it. (This book is geared more for women, and possibly couples.) The morning that I finished this book, I knew that I would begin rereading it the following morning. There was just too many great ideas to take in on the first read through.

Kuykendall's words are both encouraging and convicting. She describes circums
Beverly Jones
Jun 11, 2019 rated it really liked it
It's not always easy to love our neighbors, but the Bible lets us know that loving other people is essential. We love because God loved us first. Alexandra Kuykendall uses this book to highlight seven different practices for showing love to those that are around us. These practices include humility, asking questions, listening, embracing the awkward, acceptance, lightening up, and giving freely. We can all learn something from this book about how to improve our habits and treatment of other peop ...more
Katherine Jones
Apr 10, 2019 rated it really liked it
My favorite kind of soul-improvement books are those that offer fresh insights into familiar issues. The sort that provides a new lens through which to really see solutions which have always been right there. Alexandra Kuykendall’s Loving My Actual Neighbor : 7 Practices to Treasure the People Right in Front of You does exactly this, using 2 Peter 1 as a unique roadmap to personal and spiritual growth.

Because I am and always will be a story girl, the surest way to connect with my heart and soul
Jun 20, 2019 rated it really liked it
Alexandra Kuykendall’s newest book, Loving My Actual Neighbor, is a timely reminder to act on one of Jesus’ greatest commandments. The author lays the framework in seven practices that enable us to do this: 1) Holding a posture of humility 2) Asking questions to learn 3) Being quiet to listen 4) Standing in the awkward 5) Accepting what is 6) Lightening up 7) Giving freely. Each practice is explained in its own chapter and several practical suggestions for each are given under “Practicing the Pr ...more
Apr 09, 2019 rated it really liked it
Goodreads needs half-stars. This book is a 3.5 for me.

Oh I had such great high hopes for this book. I loved her Christmas book and was so excited to be on her advanced read team!

This just kinda fell flat for me. It's not written in the same style as her Christmas book, which I think is a lot of the problem. She had a lot of great stories, but they were so detailed, almost too detailed to hold my interest for long. Also the chapters were so long and had a lot of information in them.

The good is t
Apr 05, 2019 rated it it was amazing
"The love of Christ demonstrated though us"

Loving My Actual Neighbor is a how-to guide for those who are stuck in the comfort of their own home and in need of an awakening. It outlines seven easy steps to build a community and get the most out of our relationships with those close to us. Alex takes heart to God's instructions of "loving our neighbor as ourselves" with humorous anecdotes and heartwarming stories (my favorite is Frank, read the book to find out why). The part I liked the best abou
Apr 28, 2019 rated it really liked it
Author Alexandra Kuykendall asks a question in her fourth book, Loving My Actual Neighbor: how, do we love our neighbor? This is a question that the Bible talks about, yet believers are not sure how to put into practice on a practical level. It is something that I have struggled with and am thankful that Alexandra addresses in her book. She shows believers how we are to take Matthew 22:38 and live it out.
The book includes sections on very practical ways to start loving your neighbors including
May 13, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Loving my Actual Neighbor By Alexander kuykendall

i Really loved this Book, when I first received this book I assumed it was about fellow Christians and learning to treat people better, but it was so much more it teaches you how to be kind and more observant to everyone around you to be more communitive with people around you and these 7 tips really show great tips and it has helped me realized how I need to grow in a better communication with those around me as well as get to know people. I wou
Diane Higgins
May 03, 2019 rated it it was amazing
“Loving My Actual Neighbor” by Alexandra Kuykendall was a great read! This book held lots of tidbits of information that opened my eyes. Sometimes we know what to do to reach out to our “neighbor”, but we still need to be reminded of some things.

Alexandra Kuykendall uses 2 Peter 1 to show some principles that we need to practice for loving our neighbor. These are things that Jesus commanded us. I love the way she wrote this in such a practical and easy to understand way. She shares seven princip
Tom Burkholder
Apr 04, 2019 rated it really liked it
In the book Loving My Actual Neighbor, author Alexandra Kuykendall writes about loving our neighbors in a world that has beome disconnected from each other. Kuykendall writes: “I will be using the term neighbor to refer to those who are near enough to see, touch, smell, and hear in person, because these relationships offer some unique dynamics. There is something about being in someone’s physical presence that is different from seeing them on a screen or reading about them.”
This was a great prac
Apr 02, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Who is your neighbor? In her new book, "Loving My Actual Neighbor: 7 Practices to Treasure the People Right in Front of You," Alexandra Kuykendall explores that question. In it she shares that our neighbors are all the people we are surrounded by, not just those surrounding our house. She includes practical ideas of how to love those around us. Many of the things she talks about doing are easily accomplished and happen organically. Some of the things, if you're anything like me, may cause you to ...more
Apr 11, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: launches
As Christians, we know we are called to love our neighbor. Love? Like my friend. We all know that we like and need friends. And that is what Alexandra Kuykendall lays out the framework for where to begin. From practicing practical steps readers can take to love their neighbors like a friend. With her simple, easy to understand steps - humility, learn, listen, standing, accepting, lightening up, giving freely - use common sense in becoming friends. Works in any neighborhood, whether here in the U ...more
Apr 30, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I read Alexandria Kuykendall's earlier book, Loving My Actual Life, and enjoyed it, so I was excited to read this new release. I found I enjoyed this one even more. I found the seven practices for loving our neighbors both practical and grounded in the Biblical commandments. I especially appreciated the way she lead the practices with "having a posture of humility,” which is so antithetical to how many Christians approach loving their neighbors and caring for those who are different from them. T ...more
Amanda Jones
Apr 02, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Sometimes you read a book that offers you advice to help you do something better and it seems too hard, so you set it aside and move on to the next thing. This is NOT that book! In "Loving My Actual Neighbor", Alex Kuykendall gives practical steps that you can immediately and easily begin to put into practice. With real life examples that will make you laugh and cry (I needed tissues!), this is an extremely helpful guide to being a better neighbor and example of Christ's love to those in your co ...more
May 12, 2019 rated it really liked it
This book was very unique dynamic writing, inspiring and compelling to read with that also will giving us to an exploring how to love one the another beside family and friend by starting from our neighbor, getting more honest in relationship by using your moments, day, weeks, or years with experience life as God intended with respect for all and the another. I highly recommend to everyone must to read this book. “ I received complimentary a copy of this book from Baker Books Bloggers for this re ...more
Daniele Pankratz
Apr 01, 2019 rated it it was amazing
I didn’t know I needed the message in this book until I started reading it. I’ve been a Christian my whole life, but being shy and introverted, I rarely went out of my way to express love to the neighbour I’m not friends with.
Alexandra writes in a practical way, it’s easy to understand and apply her ideas. She made me realize how much of Jesus’ teachings I was “ignoring” for my own comfort, and it inspired me to be more proactive in loving the people that are right beside me but I don’t usually
Jun 06, 2019 rated it liked it
Christian-centric view of basic neighborly principles, but remove the references to God and you've got yourself a friendly "how to be a good person" or "how to not be a d*ck" book. Quick and inviting read. Short, simple, purposeful chapters with activities and reflections at the end of each.

Principles are:
1. holding a posture of humility
2. asking questions to learn
3. being quiet to listen
4. standing in the awkward
5. accepting what is
6. lightening up
7. giving freely
Melissa Crawford
May 07, 2019 rated it it was amazing
*I received an advanced reader’s copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Hospitality has been a subject that has weighed heavy on my heart for some time, so I jumped on the chance to read "Loving My Actual Neighbor."

My neighbor isn't just the person that lives next door or across the street... The stories in this book not only touched my heart, but inspired me to go out and love those around me.

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