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373 pages, Hardcover
First published February 5, 2019
Because that is what we do.
My name is Anna and I am twenty-six and anorexic. I have not always been; I used to want things and do things. Now I am not sure how much of me still exists.
Once again, it strikes me how little Matthias, or any normal person, can understand. How little of an eating disorder the naked eye can actually see.
She could have blamed all the running or, more simply, anorexia. But that would have meant acknowledging anorexia. Instead, she blamed Matthias.
How do you know I will be fine?
She looks up from her book, no longer emotionless. The saddest smile and answer follow:
Because I’ve seen girls like you get better. I’ve been here for four years.
The stomachache worsened. She thought of Philippe. Who had found her pretty, just not enough. Smart and elegant, but not enough. Philippe, who had told her "I love you" and "Do you really want that slice of cake?"