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How She Died, How I Lived

3.58  ·  Rating details ·  780 ratings  ·  145 reviews
I was one of five. The five girls Kyle texted that day. The girls it could have been. Only Jamie--beautiful, saintly Jamie--was kind enough to respond. And it got her killed.

On the eve of Kyle's sentencing a year after Jamie's death, all the other "chosen ones" are coping in various ways. But our tenacious narrator is full of anger, stuck somewhere between the horrifying p
Published November 13th 2018 by Little, Brown
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3.58  · 
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 ·  780 ratings  ·  145 reviews

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Alana • thebookishchick
Never in my life have a reached out to an author after finishing a book until now. That's how powerful I felt this story was and I am so incredibly grateful to have been given the opportunity to read this.

Our narrator struggles throughout the entire story with why she got to live and Jamie had to die. When the murder trial re-opens one year after Jamie's death to determine if her murderer, Kyle, should receive the death penalty, the MC then starts to struggle with coming face to face with the ma
Kayla Brunson
"I want to be alive. And to be okay with being alive."

I went into this book expecting to come out an emotional wreck. Sadly, that wasn't my outcome. In short, this book lacked the dept that I was expecting and was really formed as just another contemporary. 

Now, I'm not saying that it's a bad book. This covers topics from survivor's guilt, moving on, and being true to yourself. I feel like we could have really dived more deeply into those emotions, but the writing wasn't there. 

"I don't even kno
Jan 01, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Wow, just wow... this one will stay with me
PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Nov 14, 2018 rated it it was amazing
I received an ARC of this novel in exchange for an honest review.
I really, really enjoyed “How She Died, How I Lived,” much more than I was anticipating. I was expecting it to be a bit of a thriller, definitely on the darker side, but I was pleasantly surprised by the variety of emotion in this book. We follow our main character (who remains mysteriously unnamed) as she deals with survivor’s guilt. She and four other girls were texted by a boy named Kyle. Only one replied—and she was raped and m
DNF at 48%

It's interesting but also tediously boring.
This is hard to review...I feel bad giving 5 stars to a book about a teenage girl being murdered.
I just feel that it was written so well. It's told from the perspective of another teenage girl and her struggle with survivor's guilt.
When murder is committed, the age of the victim doesn't matter, it's still horrible. I think when it happens to a teenager, it's worse for the friends (and family) of the victim. Teenagers feel so invincible, they're at the high point of their lives and murder/viole
May 04, 2019 rated it really liked it
Is it weird to read a book and never know the name of the narrator?

And yet her voice was distinct, vulnerable, confused, angry, and questioning why she lived while her friend — sweet Jamie Strand — died at the hands of a former classmate.

A year later the narrator still battles survivor’s guilt as she befriends Jamie’s boyfriend. Adding to her guilt is the attraction to Charlie, who surprisingly returns the affection.

Out of all of this tragedy, the narrator finds hope and forgiveness while letti
A solid 3 star read. This is the story of dealing with survivor’s guilt and reconciling anger and forgiveness. I like that it explores both options and that the narrator remains unnamed - this story could be any of ours.
Crystal Zavala
First, let me say that I should have checked to see who the target audience was before I started this book. The book cover says 14+, so I am going to take that to mean that it is considered to be YA. After reading the book, I would definitely agree that it is written for a high schooler. The topics are probably a little too heavy for a middle reader. Because I didn't realize that the book was written for 14-18 year olds, I initially struggled with the simplicity of the writing. However, if I had ...more
Paige Green
Sep 12, 2018 rated it liked it
Disclaimer: I received this book from KidLitExchange. Thanks! All opinions are my own.

Rating: 3/5

Publication Date: November 13th, 2018

Genre: YA Contemporary

Recommended Age: 15+ (survivor’s guilt, tragedy, regret, grief, mature scenes, romance) (trigger warning for rape and murder)

Pages: 416

Author Website

Amazon Link

Synopsis: I was one of five. The five girls Kyle texted that day. The girls it could have been. Only Jamie--beautiful, saintly Jamie--was kind enough to respond. And it got her killed.
Feb 28, 2019 rated it did not like it
I don't even remember placing a hold on this book but here I am. This was the in-between book as I read Thunderhead (which I'm LOVING... can't say the same about this one) I just read the synopsis and I was intrigued and thought it would be amazing. However, this was NOT good at all. After I finished reading, I searched the genre and of course, it was contemporary.

It's supposed to be about the murder of Jamie, who was one of the five girls that Kyle texted and was the only one to reply. Which i
Lily C.
Jun 09, 2019 rated it really liked it
I chose this book because Ms. Hughes had read it earlier this year, and the short description she gave intrigued me. I'm a sucker for teen novels, especially those serious ding scandal or death, and this book seemed like the perfect mix of the two. I think the reason I'm so drawn to books written from a teen perspective is that I myself am a teenager, and hearing a voice so like my own tell a story so much more interesting than my life is like hearing some crazy gossip from a friend, and I love ...more
Katie Thomas
Apr 07, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites
Honestly, wow. I can't tell you how much I loved this book. I've always been intrigued with murders and the gruesome gory stuff, so when I found this book I was immediately interested, but what won me and made me so excited about reading the book was the romance between Charlie (the boyfriend of the girl who was killed) and the main character (a girl the killer almost killed). I loved how the story was told. Texts were included which made you feel like you had insight on the characters lives and ...more
Stephanie Ward
'How She Died, How I Lived' is a very relevant and heartbreaking young adult contemporary novel that deals with several important topics and real life scenarios. I know that there's supposed to be a silver lining in this book, a sense of hope that filters through. But for me, this book was just incredibly sad and thought provoking. The topics that it covers - survivor's guilt, death, hate, love, forgiveness, moving on, being true to yourself (to name just a few) are really serious and incredibly ...more
Dec 26, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Mary Crockett's novel "How She Died, How I Lived" resonated deep in my bones in a number of ways. At first glance, the book tackles an unfortunately real scenario that we are forced to encounter and endure; the violence that women are subjected to, often merely for being women, is grossly and painstakingly true. The contents of this novel did so much more than rely on the controversially relevant subject matter to propel itself forward—this comes from an artfully mastered control of technicality ...more
Sep 15, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: read-in-2018
***I received a free eArc from Edelweiss***

Although the hook is what caught me- 5 local girls are sent a text that only one of them answers, and when she meets with the boy they all know, she is brutally beaten, raped, and murdered- I stayed for the MC's grief and sense of being outside her old life.

A year later and our main character, un-named, is dealing with survivor's guilt, her world once more rocked by the killer's upcoming sentencing. She's also starting to fall for the dead girl's boyfr
Thanks to @kidlitexchange network for the free review copy of this book--all opinions are my own

The unnamed narrator is one of five girls that Kyle texted the day he murdered Jamie. Kyle senselessly and brutally murdered one of his classmates at random and now his sentencing is coming up. The narrator can't forget how easily she could have been the one who was killed that day. This book is about many things--grief, regret, justice, and new beginnings. It tackles survivor's guilt and how overcome
Sue (BeautyBookCorner)
1.5 Stars -- I felt like the author had some great intentions with the message she wanted to convey, but personally, I felt the execution failed miserably. There were small snippets where we get hit in the face with how prevalent rape culture and sexually predatory behavior is in our society and how this culture leads to violence against women. I applaud the author for feeling so convicted by seeing news of violence against young women to write this story.

However, the book fell very short for m
Feb 21, 2019 rated it liked it
2.5 stars rounded up. I think I’m over YA novels like this one. Perhaps I’m just tired of teenagers 😜.
Mar 22, 2019 rated it liked it
I kept waiting for something! Anything to happen?!?!?
Khristina Chess
Feb 20, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: ya-pretty-good
I wish I'd been able to read this one in a single sitting because I think my short bursts didn't allow me to fully experience the emotional depth of what's happening in this book. The main character wrestles with survivor's guilt after a classmate is brutally murdered in a random act. There are some really lovely moments near the end when she speaks to the mother of the girl and says, "You must hate me." Or when she muses over the fact that at any moment, some random person can choose to kill yo ...more
Alex (Briennai)
Nov 14, 2018 rated it really liked it
The main character is beating herself up because she feels that Kyle should have killed her, not her friend Jamie. She almost went to meet Kyle, and it could have been her. Now, a year later, Kyle is getting sentenced. She has to go with her other four friends and testify against him, and she will see him for the first time since he killed Jamie. She doesn't know how she is going to deal with it, or her attraction to Charlie, Jamie's ex-boyfriend. 

This book is about the main character and her fr
Nov 10, 2018 rated it really liked it
How She Died, How I Lived isn't my normal read, but I couldn't let go of the idea of a girl struggling with survivor's guilt after a classmate was murdered. Our main character was a nameless female high school student who received a text from neighborhood weirdo Kyle one random summer day. She never responded to him, but she had planned to. Instead, sweet Jamie answered his call for company and was sexually assaulted and brutally murdered. How She Died, How I Lived reminded me a bit of The Femal ...more
Bookworm LLC
Apr 23, 2018 rated it liked it
Shelves: cindy-bookshelf
How She Died, How I Lived is a story about a girl who was murdered and the friends who were left to wonder why her. I liked the story line but felt there were times the author went "Squirrel". At times it took reading a paragraph before you understood who was telling the story.
I just don't know what else to say about it. The writing style wasn't to my liking.
Emmi Rose  (emmirosereads)
Nov 17, 2018 rated it it was ok
Shelves: two-stars
Thank you once again to the NOVL for sending me an early copy to read and review.

I'm confident that this is not a case of a bad book at all. How She Died, How I lived was well written, with solid characters and a great premise. I think it simply just wasn't a book for me and wasn't what I was expecting. It didn't quite provoke the emotions I thought it would either.

For being a book about survivors guilt and grief I felt like it didn't go into much depth about it. It seemed pretty surface leve
Dec 05, 2018 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: contemporaries
I received an ARC from TheNovl for an honest review.

How She Died, How I Lived is told in first person, and the MC is not named during the whole book, so I'm just going to be referring to her as MC. She's one of five girls who was texted over a year ago by a boy named Kyle, but she didn't answer back. The girl who did answer back, Jamie, ended up getting raped and murdered by Kyle. The way the book starts made me cringe- the murder took place 1 year 2 months prior, and there's some description o
Joni Thomas
Jan 14, 2019 rated it really liked it
This review is also posted on Amazon and on my blog Joni Reads

Kicking off the new blog AND the New Year with an absolutely incredible YA book by Mary Crockett titled How She Died, How I Lived. Now this is going to sound a bit strange but I'm a sucker for books on really heavy topics. Topics like self harm, school shooting, kidnapping, etc. Basically if the book could be made into an episode of Law and Order SVU, Criminal Minds, or CSI then I am going to ad
Dec 28, 2018 rated it did not like it
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
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Mary Crockett is an award-winning poet and author of the novel HOW SHE DIED, HOW I LIVED. A native of the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, Mary grew up as the youngest of six children in a family of misfits. She has worked as everything from a history museum director to a toilet seat hand model. In her other life, she teaches creative writing at Roanoke College in Virginia. If you tweet at her, chan ...more
“I am many things, but loveable isn't one of them.” 2 likes
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