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The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe

3.99  ·  Rating details ·  77 ratings  ·  24 reviews
Kara Everglades has just finished her first year of high school and is longing for an adventure. So far her only option is an invitation from some upperclassmen to watch them drunkenly race a bunch of bullfrogs in a ditch. To be honest, she was hoping for something a bit more exciting.
Her grandfather, Cornelius Everglades, is a renegade who founded his own island micronati
Paperback, 314 pages
Published January 30th 2018 by CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform (first published January 2018)
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3.99  · 
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 ·  77 ratings  ·  24 reviews

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Mar 15, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: fiction, comedy
A very funny story about formerly dead grandfathers, Nazi-curious aliens, mascots imparting important life lessons, pirate radio shows with catchy titles, The King of Maui’s succulent pigs (extra crispy), runner’s diarrhea and so much more. As with his first novel, “Gone Whalin’,” Conor Lostowka made me laugh every few pages, and I had a great time reading this book. Check out his (and Mike Nelson’s) podcast, 372 Pages We’ll Never Get Back, and, of course, RiffTrax.
Ben De Bono
Aug 05, 2018 rated it really liked it
The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe doesn't quite reach the heights of Gone Whalin', but once it finds its groove it proves a more than worthy follow up. Both of Conor Lastowka's novels are exercises in unbridled insanity and watching it unfold is glorious. The fact that a good portion of the insanity in this book is pretty close to fact makes it even better. The real life micronation of Sealand is a more than close approximation of HAWAll (minus feral seagulls, I assume).

I can't
Diana Gail
Mar 22, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A hint of Heinlein, a dash of Adams, and a pinch of Pratchett.
"372 Pages We'll Never Get Back" is doing their podcast on "The Forensic Certified Public Accountant and the Cremated 64-SQUARES Financial Statements", which was not a book I could see my way clear to purchasing but was available on Kindle Unlimited. In my ongoing quest to not read Ulysses, I thought I might as well use my 30-day free trial to read 372 Page's own Conor Lastowka's recent effort.

This is the story of a girl who discovers her dead grandfather is actually the king/governor/sole inhab
Phil Villarreal
Mar 15, 2019 rated it liked it
After a slow, dad joke-filled start I was wondering whether I had found myself in a mire of bland, unfunny madcap shenanigans that would never manage to right itself.

But Conor Lastowaka manages to step up his game once he makes it past the awkward introductions to his "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy"-like intergalactic goof, he's able to interject occasional strings of hilarious, belly laugh-erupting writing.

Comedy novels are among the toughest to write, so a certain measure of inconsist
Nov 20, 2018 rated it really liked it
Donald and I decided to read this together after enjoying the "372 Pages" podcast by the author, Conor Lastowka, and Michael J. Nelson (of MST3K and Rifftrax fame). We didn't know what to expect, but considering that the author writes for Rifftrax (and was funny in the podcast), we were optimistic.

It took me a little while to acclimate to this style of humor (which often veers into the absurd), but once we'd settled in, it was a very funny read, and we laughed more and more frequently as the sto
Apr 28, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Listened to the Audible Original edition.

This one goes on my unexpectedly recommend list. If anyone has such a thing this would be on the top of it. It was quirky, funny and totally on point for a not quite alien takeover but more like they don't know anything about anything.... except for...trash. Yep, trash.

The whole Everglades family relationship was absolute craziness and one could totally picture at least part of it being one of their family members.

And who knew being part of the Olympics
3.75 stars
For some reason, I don’t usually like very comedic sci-fi books, or ones that are just overly silly. I think I should since I like funny stuff, but I get bored and feel like the author is trying too hard. But I liked this one. It is definitely overly silly and straight up ridiculous at times. But I liked it all. I am guessing it is because of how well-done the audio production was. Without the audio, I think I would not have liked it and would have ended up quitting on it. Even though
Matt Nelson
Feb 07, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Olympic Gold in the Belly Laugh competition!

After having read and re-read Conor Lastowka's first novel, Gone Whalin', I understandably was eager to see if his newest novel would reach the same lofty heights of comedy. I'm happy to say it does-it pole vaults over the bar, in fact! Enh? Nothing? Tough crowd. At any rate, if you're a fan of zany misunderstandings, obscure cultural phenomenons, and possibly-cursed mascot costumes, this novel is definitely for you. Hilarious from beginning to end! Hi
Charlie Oliver
May 20, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I entered into this book with low expectations if I'm going to be honest. I don't like pole vaulting, have no interest in aliens vs humans sporting literature, and the cover looked like a book for kids.

But I trusted Conor Lastowka because he works for Rifftrax and I was right to do so. This is a hilarious book that made me genuinely laugh out loud--not one of the "LOLs" that the kids say but do not really mean.
Ryan Boros
Feb 21, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Unconventional (grand)parenting
Out-conning the IOC
The Wide Galaxy of Sports

Sometimes books come along that checks all the boxes right off the bad. Going in, I'm a fan of Conor's 372 pages podcast. The audiobook voice cast is outstanding with a lot of RiffTrax/MST3K alumns. This book was right in my wheelhouse and it didn't disappoint. Entertaining and very funny.
Vernon Burt
Jan 31, 2019 rated it really liked it
This is one of those slapstick style comedy novels that focuses on pushing things into the very limits of human absurdity. The jokes are decent and the whole thing does make for a nice break from more serious fare.
E.A. Lake
Mar 05, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I wasn't sure I was going to like this one. But a little way in I found myself listening closer and closer. It's whimsical and fun with a host of interesting characters. A great diversion from what I normally read and listen to.
Toni Joseph
Mar 05, 2019 rated it really liked it
I’ve never read anything this weird but the Audible version of this book was amazing. It has about 20 people doing voices and all sorts of sound effects and background noise. A super, super fun listen.
Tony Kelly
May 22, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Very fun. Not sure if it's better than Douglas Adams, but it's definitely more modern. And it might even be funnier.
Jun 27, 2018 rated it liked it
Comedy is hard. I expected to like this book more than I did - I adore Rifftrax and enjoy Conor's podcast, but this book was a little too silly for my taste.
Mar 06, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2019
Audio version is a masterpiece!
P.S. Don't be misled by a 4 star rating. In my subjective system of ratings, 4 stars means 11/10.
Pres Maxson
Aug 01, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Hilarious second offering from an author worth watching. The characters and world created in The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe kept me at least smiling the whole time.
Khris Reaves
Jun 13, 2019 rated it liked it
Listened to the Audible dramatization. Pretty funny and great cast!
Mar 06, 2019 rated it really liked it
I quite enjoyed it. There are definitely some really funny bits. This is probably the closest I will ever come to reading a book about any form of sports.
Christian H
May 31, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book was hilarious. Love the 372 Pages podcast, loved this book. Laughed out loud the whole way through.
Feb 19, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The chapter on the history of the mascots had me trying and failing to hold in tears of laughter at work.

Apr 05, 2019 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I had listened to the clips and thought this would be a fun book. It was only ok. The narration was good, but the story... If I were a 12 year old boy I might have enjoyed it more.
May 15, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
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Conor Lastowka has written two comedy novels, The Pole Vault Championship of the Entire Universe and Gone Whalin'. He's also co-authored two anthologies of terrible Wikipedia writing, [Citation Needed] Vol. 1 & Vol. 2

He works as a Senior Writer-Producer at

He co-hosts the podcast book club "372 Pages We'll Never Get Back" with Mike Nelson.

He lives in Burlington, VT with his wife L
“now that 9-Krelblax thought about it, were soon enough after the Secretary of War’s conviction for sleeping with an underage Piltrixian refugee to be in extremely poor taste. “An idle tentacle is a Piltrixian’s greatest ally.” 0 likes
“Perhaps the saying should actually be that all folk wisdom has its roots in horniness.” 0 likes
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