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Crazy Madly Deeply

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Holden sees things.
Lots of things.
Things we would call ugly, but he believes are beautiful.

He paints sad pictures.
And strums lonely guitars.
He drowns out the taunting voices while shunning the expected norms.

I let them hurt him.
I wasn’t strong enough to speak out.
I hurt him, too, only to prove I wasn’t just like him.

But then I saw him.
I heard him.
I learned why Holden wasn’t CRAZY like they said.

I loved him MADLY.
I fell for him DEEPLY.
And alone, I decided to save a man who was the most beautiful of us all.

406 pages

First published March 14, 2018

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About the author

Lily White

37 books2,467 followers
Lily White is a bestselling author who likes to dabble on the dark side of romance. She is most known for her Masters Series, Target This, Wishing Well, and The Five.

When she isn’t writing as Lily White you can find other books by her under M.S. Willis where she has penned the Control Series, the Estate Series, and Because of Ellison (contemporary romance).

Lily enjoys stretching her writing muscles by continuing to challenge herself with each book she publishes.

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5 stars
179 (43%)
4 stars
136 (33%)
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64 (15%)
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22 (5%)
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 134 reviews
Profile Image for The Sassy Bookworm.
3,459 reviews2,355 followers
March 6, 2018


description~WRITING - PLOT - PACE~
I seriously LOVE this author. L-O-V-E her. Every book I read by Lily is different from the previous. And in this one, we are treated to a heartbreaking and original romance between two broken souls from different sides of the tracks. And of course, it wouldn't be a Lily White book without it including one hell of a twist. I am RARELY surprised by twists, but this one left me going WTF??!! As always with this author the writing was superb. The pace was a little iffy for me and this is why I couldn't give it a perfect 5-Stars. It felt a bit too long for me and the middle part dragged. That said, the plot was still engaging enough that I never felt the need to skim. It was quite an emotional book that will have you reaching for the tissues often. Last, it was all wrapped up in a satisfying conclusion.

HOLDEN...Holden was pretty much a perfect hero. My heart shattered for him several times throughout this book. He was sweet. He was respectful towards women. He was an outcast and fine with being one. He loved his sister Deli. He looks past Michaela's weakness to see the broken girl underneath and then he gave her his forgiveness and love. <--- honestly not sure I would have done the same. I really just completely loved his character.

MICHAELA...Michaela was a bit more of a mixed bag for me. I struggled with how weak she was for a good portion of this book. She just let Jack and pretty much EVERYONE roll right over her and in doing so she ruined peoples lives. Now I get she herself was being abused, so I understood. But she never reached the perfectness that was Holden for me. That said, she does FINALLY find a backbone and the way she stands up for Holden did win her a lot of extra brownie points.


There were some good secondary characters in this one. I loved Holden's sister Deli. I hated Jack with a passion. Both Dr. Silva and Angela were great. Each one added an extra layer of depth to the story.

Low. This is pretty much what I would call a slow burn romance. I don't remember exactly at what point these two have sex but it was fairly late in the book. The sex scenes while good, were also more of the tame side. I am usually not a fan of slow burns but the lateness of the sex and the tame scenes were well matched to the story, so I wasn't bothered by it.

Medium. I actually didn't find this particularly angsty. It was emotional. Very emotional, but it wasn't the type of angst that has you biting your nails or your stomach in knots. There was a bit of OW drama in the form of a f-ck buddy of the hero's wanting more. Drama might be a stretch as after Holden tells her he doesn't want more she simply disappears. Now, this is one of those times that I felt this OW didn't really serve a point in the story. Especially since she is weirdly NEVER seen or heard from again when she works at the same place as Holden (and later Michaela). Not to mention Angela owns the place. I found it incredibly odd that she was never mentioned again. Especially with all the stuff that went down near the end. There is also some OM drama in the form of Michaela's boyfriend Jack. Neither were virgins and the past sex life talk is kept to a minimum.

I really enjoyed this one a lot. It wasn't perfect but the issues I had were really only small things. The writing was great. The plot was original. The characters were well developed. I cried. I smiled. I cursed. I cheered. I fell in love with Holden. I forgave Michaela. I wanted to high five Angela. It was an amazing book, therefore, yours truly is going to give this one two HUGE thumbs up.description 



Profile Image for warhawke.
1,331 reviews2,007 followers
March 7, 2018
Genre: Contemporary Romance
Type: Standalone
POV: First Person - Dual

Holden Bishop was a man who stood up for what he believed in. Coming from the poor side of the town, his defiance made him the target of the privileged and ignorant populations.

Michaela Paige was the popular princess everyone wanted to be or be with. Being the daughter of one of the prominent family, she had a life served on a silver platter. But things weren't always what it seemed especially when hers and Holden's life collided to a rude awakening.

Perhaps truly loving a person can bring out their best qualities. Perhaps forgiveness can lift the veil of remorse to reveal the true character lingering beneath.

I think it'd be hard for anyone not to feel for Holden. I have a lot of respect for him for refusing to be "normal". He learned to endure everything thrown his way.

I often wondered what it felt like to not want to fit in, wondered if the freedom that came with it was worth the stupid taunts and contemptuous pranks.

Michaela on the other hand was the complete opposite. Everything she did had to be thought with careful considerations. Her life was stifling and she had to learn to overcome the fear of expectations.

I've always love Lily White's dark books. If this is how she writes her contemporary romance, I'll love them too. The story wrung out various emotions from anger and hate, to fear and sorrow. I could put myself in the situations and feel for the characters. I also like how the characters evolved throughout the book.

You don’t know pain until it’s written plainly across a loved one’s expression. You don’t know loss until you have no choice but to stare it in the eyes and watch helplessly while it destroys a beautiful person.

Crazy Madly Deeply is a story of overcoming fear and rising up to stand tall. It would appeal to readers looking for engaging romance that focuses on both love and life.

I love Angela like crazy lol! I'd one someone like her by my side that's for sure

🔹 🎨 🔹 . . . (F)BR With Twinsie CC, Loyda & Susan . . . 🔹 🎨 🔹

For more reviews/reveals/giveaways visit:

Profile Image for Jennifer Kyle.
2,409 reviews4,662 followers
November 13, 2021
4.5 'LARGE' Stars


This is a bit different for author Lily White. This romance is more of a YA type of a read. Nevertheless, I very much enjoyed this story and her trademark WTH moments are still plenty. It's a rough ride as our terrific hero is put through the wringer by the untouchable upper class of his high school, to the point of perhaps even insanity?

"You broke me down until I was small like you. Does that make you happy?"


Usually, a book redeems a hero. However, in this story the heroine most surely does. She goes above and beyond to right the wrongs against our Holden Bishop. The story has many twists and turns and a bunch of heartache leading a reader to worry how the heck can things work out for our hero. Lily White wraps the plot together seamlessly while gifting a truly tangible hero!

"Love never falters, not in divorce, not in anger, not even in death. It NEVER goes away. "

Profile Image for SueBee★bring me an alpha!★.
2,417 reviews14.2k followers
Want to read
March 14, 2018


Holden sees things.
Lots of things.
Things we would call ugly, but he believes are beautiful.
He paints sad pictures.
And strums lonely guitars.
He drowns out the taunting voices while shunning the expected norms.
I let them hurt him.
I wasn’t strong enough to speak out.
I hurt him, too, only to prove I wasn’t just like him.
But then I saw him.
I heard him.
I learned why Holden wasn’t CRAZY like they said.
I loved him MADLY.
I fell for him DEEPLY.
And alone, I decided to save a man who was the most beautiful of us all.
Profile Image for CC.
1,085 reviews645 followers
March 9, 2018

Holden Bishop grew up on the wrong side of the tracks, but he always remained true to those he loved despite being labeled a freak by those who were lesser. When an incident occurs, it begins a cruel and maddening cycle irrevocably affecting Holden’s life.

“You broke me down until I was small like you. Does that make you happy?”

Michaela Paige is one of the popular rich girls who outwardly appears to enjoy a gifted life of opportunity and privilege. Always doing what is expected of her, Michaela lives in silence until she finally finds her voice.

“I promise I’ll speak up when I should. I promise I won’t bow down to what other people want when I know it goes against everything I know is right.”

While living distinctly different lives, Holden and Michaela cross paths one fateful night and it changes their entire perspective and future. For Holden, he acts to protect his loved ones and his strength lies in his innate ability to remain good in the face of injustice. With Michaela, she always admired Holden but also knew he was off limits. Now that Michaela finds herself in a situation, she and Holden learn much more about each other than they could have imagined.

“I’d barely had time to catch my breath before his mouth was on me, his legs shoving mine apart, his fingers dipping down to places that had me moaning while he swallowed those sounds and worked me in a frenzy, never stopping, never slowing down..."

In starting this book, I wasn’t sure what to expect but it certainly delivered in the feels and angst department. From the onset, Holden’s integrity is evident and his pain is felt on so many levels. In not knowing Holden’s fate, the angst is high as the plot continues to unfold. Viewing Holden through Michaela’s eyes is a tasty treat as he is definitely the strong, silent type but he is more complex and vulnerable than she initially realizes.

What ensues is heartbreaking and maddening to see how misconceptions can ruin the lives of these characters. However, while there is suffering there is also light and goodness that shines even brighter. This story was an incredible journey with thought provoking prose and characters that stir so much emotion.

Crazy Madly Deeply would appeal to those who want to get lost in the plight of these characters and come out stronger in the end. I highly recommend.

*An ARC was generously provided in exchange for an honest review.*

*This was a (F)BR with Twinsie Hawkey, Loyda and Susan!

For more reviews/reveals/giveaways visit:

Profile Image for Carvanz.
2,098 reviews744 followers
March 14, 2018
Holy freakin’ Hades!!! This book! There are just no words! This book stirred up so many emotions then one by one plucked them from their hiding places and flung them out in front of me to face them in all their messy glory. It was a painfully beautiful journey and I swear to any and all entities that I will never forget this amazing story!

My suggestion is to avoid reviews that give too much away. While it’s not a matter of constant twists and turns, the best part of this book is never knowing what’s going to happen next. Just settle back and let this author introduce you to her characters. They are incredible. Broken and imperfect but exactly what they needed to be to face their inner demons. Then be prepared to hold on emotionally as she takes you on a ride through a desperate and desolate plain where there is no hope to be found at its conclusion. Even the sparks of promise you glimpse along the way will always be overshadowed by the despair these characters live with.

This is a wonderfully written story full of depth. The angst is off the charts, the romance a welcome reprieve in the darkness and the secondary characters gaining a place in my heart without consuming the story. There are not enough stars for this book and I’m already feeling the mega book hangover Crazy Madly Deeply is going to leave me with.

I voluntarily read and reviewed an advanced copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Dual POV
Profile Image for JewelsyGoolsy.
565 reviews98 followers
March 19, 2018
Wow. This book had a far deeper and more important message than I expected. The romance was only a backdrop to the bigger issues at hand and I totally got it.
Profile Image for SusanAhh.
483 reviews120 followers
March 14, 2018
"We'd called him crazy, when in truth, we were the crazy ones."

So...I have been through the ARC phase of my reading and reviewing. Awhile back I became overwhelmed with the sheer number of ARC's that were before me and I just stopped. I start my review with this and the fact that I seriously wanted an ARC of this book by Lily White. I was so impressed with her writing talent and her insight in my first ever reading of her work in the "Illusions Series". I wanted to read this book which takes a different direction from the aforementioned writing into contemporary romance. I wanted to do whatever I could to get the word out about how extraordinary a writer, Ms. White truly is. I will purchase a copy of this book despite having an ARC copy.

"Crazy, Madly, Deeply" had some of the most difficult and most wonderful moments that moved my heart and touched my soul. There is sweet genius in the character of Holden Bishop.

Holden is that kid at school who despite his good looks and attractive physique holds himself apart from the popular rich kids in a town that is divided by wealth. The poorer section of town is even referred to as "the servant's quarters". Of course this is where the scourge of drug dealing leaves its mark even as spoiled rich kids are regular customers of the dealers.

Holden is gifted with a natural sense of self-confidence and artistic talent. He has a completely different perspective on the world. He also has the heart of a guardian. For defying their small town conventions, he is labeled a freak. Whereas Holden has no desire to sidle up to the popular monied kids at school his little sister, Delilah, a gifted dancer, desperately wants to fit in with the popular rich girls on her dance team. Michaela the queen bee of them all inexplicably takes Delilah under her wing.

Holden is ever on guard when it comes to his little sister. The wealthy football players in town were known to throw wild parties were they would slip drugs into the drinks of unsuspecting girls desperate to be part of their crowd. Then they would assault them multiple times sharing the unfortunate drugged girls with each other. When Holden sees one of the football players touch Delilah inappropriately in the school cafeteria, he gets physical with him and Michaela's boyfriend Jack. Before Jack jumps into the fray he carelessly shoves his girlfriend Michaela to the floor where she injures herself significantly. This fight sets in motion the catastrophe to come in these characters lives.

In this day and age we are inundated with a deluge of stories from women who have endured assault at home, in their relationships, in their careers, schools and churches. We look at ourselves as a society and wonder how could this have happened for so long? There are no easy or simple answers but this author makes an excellent point about how money plays an intrinsic role in hushing things up, corrupting the system, even the wives and daughters of the wealthy are not expected to make waves if they are being harmed or know of abuse by their husbands, friends, brothers or fathers. How then does a poor girl who wishes to be popular contend with being assaulted by the powerful rich boys without being doubted, publicly shamed and made a pariah?

As circumstances push Michaela and Holden in close proximity, Holden has a chance to discuss "abuse" with Michaela. He is astonished to learn that the monied did not fiercely protect their women. Michaela is deeply ashamed of her complicit silence in the circumstances of the girls she witnessed harmed and even the abuse she suffered at the mercy of her drug addicted boyfriend, Jack. The reader sees a magnificent change in Michaela as she finds her truth and her voice. Michaela evolves into a true heroine in the end for herself and for her Holden.

The love story of Holden and Michaela is breathtaking. The author paints their story with words. There is an urgency and desperation to their love because of the circumstances in which they find themselves. The sexiness is in the intensity, the healing, the fierce loyalty. The author blesses us with the characters' thoughts and musings...some of it situational and some of it universal truth.

The story is mostly told in alternating POV's of Holden and Michaela. Delilah has a chapter or so. The writing engages the reader from start to finish. At the finish my heart was tender from "all the feels". But more than this, my spirit soared for the triumph love had over "smallness", needless tragedy and suffering.

I was so very lucky and happy to Buddy Read this ARC with fellow SHHluts:
Mistress CC, Loyda and warhawke!!!
Reading with you made the experience more wonderful!!!
Thank you!!!

Profile Image for Lo Bookfrantic.
773 reviews573 followers
March 10, 2018
4.5 Stars

Review coming! ....this one made me cried like a baby not so much as I wanted because I was driving while listening to the book and I had to hold my tears at bay...it was the worse feeling in the world. LMAO This baby requires privacy and letting the tears flow all the way haha

This book requires lots and lots of tissues my fav kinds lol

Profile Image for Mirjam.
1,757 reviews102 followers
February 10, 2020
***Lives aren’t just shaped by the achievements we accomplish, our lives are also shaped by our mistakes***

OMG, my heart was in tatters while reading this book! Lily White, what did you do to me? I was a big mess and saw hubby frequently looking my way with his arched brow.
I devour everything she writes and this was another blow-my-mind book.

Holden Bishop, I just LOVED him, life was a harsh one due to plain and simple jealousy. But Holden pushed on and I thought him to be larger than life.
He is just perfect, loves his family and is fiercely protective towards his sister, Delilah.
Holden is a kind soul who respects women, couldn’t be bother to prove himself just to fit in and saw the inner strength in Michaela beneath her weak exterior.

We’d called him crazy, when in truth, we were the crazy ones.
Crazy for not recognizing a good person among us.
Crazy for judging him when we were the ones who should have been judged.
Crazy for so needlessly hurting a man that wanted nothing from us but the respect to let him live in peace.
Crazy for not seeing that he had more raw talent in his pinky finger than any of us had in our entire bodies.

Michaela Paige, for a great part of the book she was spineless and bland, the proverbial doormat, a small person. Her cowardly behavior has led to a lot of people being hurt and abused, including Holden and his family.
When, with the help of beautiful Holden, she finally let her inner strength show and decides to become large.

Love never falters, not in divorce, not in anger, not even in death.
It NEVER goes away.

The secondary characters in Holden’s life are amazing. Angela, what a remarkable character, she and Dr. Silva proved to Holden that he was not alone in his struggles.

Lily always has a surprise spin in her books and this one was a real jaw dropper of the I-did-not-see-that-coming kind.
I really was not able to keep it dry while reading, what a tearjerker. I highly recommend Lily White’s newest masterpiece. I would say “do not read the reviews, just read the book!”

ARC provided in exchange for an honest review.
Profile Image for JAN.
1,168 reviews793 followers
May 22, 2018
**** 4 Stars ****

It was not perfect, but it good enough to take me out of my slump.
After 5 frustrating days trying to find something to read it was with great relief that I found myself totally hooked by this story from the first page. I wanted to kiss Jen for this recommendation!
It was super engaging and very touching.

Sadly, something in the plot left me disappointed.
I found that hard to swallow.
Nevertheless, I still think this is a solid 4 stars read.
Profile Image for Mahima.
468 reviews109 followers
October 10, 2020
✨✨✨The LARGEST possible stars✨✨✨
This book reduced me to a big emotional mess😭
It evoked that emotion in me which since the last week I thought I had lost. I guess that's the best compliment one could ever give.

After reading some average and some trashy books this is what I wanted.

Thank you universe for making me read Lily White's amazing work. Man, she has a magic power with the words. I was hooked from the very first page.

⚫ Characters:
My heart broke for Holden. He such a good soul. And I know it will sound cliche but "It's not fair". I think I am setting him up on a pedestal for being so so so strong also for treating girls with utmost respect.

Whereas Micheala was a snob but thankfully she too became a good woman after all the hardships she faced. She was no longer a snob infact turns out she's got a good heart and strongest determination.

⚫The story was emotional, heartbreaking and so much worth reading.
One of the best book of the year💝
Profile Image for Shabby  -BookBistroBlog.
1,513 reviews814 followers
March 9, 2018
You never enter LilyWorld unprepared. You should be ready to be stun-gunned by the sadistic blackness in her books. That's one thing sure about in this world, after death and taxes.......Or so you'd think!!! But like all Evil Geniuses, she still manages to treat you to a spectacular story filled with every colour of emotion possible with èlan
A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet not that this story is sweet by YA/NA standards, but by Lily standards, it carries poignancy & vulnerability. It's rounded at the corners, softer around the edges but the content is so formidable, you can't ignore it. You MUST NOT ignore it, around you, your school, your community, your town or your country. Again the topic is very contemporaneous and sadly prevalent!
Just like Angela's mean left hook , out of nowhere comes THIS story, of Perspectives, of vantages and Advantages. You see Lily takes you to a remote town of Tranquil Falls. The irony isn't lost on us, it's the most untranquil place in the world. There's social and statistical divide in this town.
the train tracks that cut the town into two unequal halves, the stately mansions holding court on the right while what was referred to as the servants’ quarters plagued the left.
The poorer or underprivileged kids, esp Delilah and Holden Bishop are pepetually taunted, teased & bullied. Delilah in hopes of getting accepted into the upper clique, follows the school princess Michaela Paige like a puppy.

She desired the limelight, the wealth, the esteem, the friendships of the popular kids who’d gathered together in their exclusive group that believed being worshipped had been their birthright

Michaela takes Deli under her wing, appreciative of her,But Holden has to hiss and spit on the sidelines, which suits him just fine. The tragic day in the cafeteria has a domino effect on everybody's lives, but more on the Bishops. Their family is torn apart and the kids' futures ruined forever !! Holden is not only an owner of a beautiful body , but a beautiful soul & heart, and immense talent his paint speckled abs.
Abs that carried the mark of an artist’s trade, the hint of a beautiful mind, the knowledge that within the recesses of that man’s body lay a soul that was far more brilliant and superior than mine. Rational mind kryptonite

The unfairness meted out to Holden made me so angry, I wanted to bash the bullies' heads and set this tainted and corrupt world on fire !
Holden, in comparison, was nothing more than an afterthought, the crazy freak in a town where money, power, and popularity were all that mattered. He was garbage they wouldn’t care to toss away.
By this time, I had doubts, was I reading a Lily book?!?! Where are the cruel Masters who treat subs like sex slaves , or the Diphallic dude**shudders**😣 or the cannibalistic rednecks or people haunted by sexual abuse who turned into murderers? Instead she does a complete 180° and while we are looking for weapons of Lily's Mass destruction, she punches us in the hearts and makes us cry.
No make that tear up. No make that bawl our eyes out. 😭.
Wow !!....just wow!! Never expect the norm from her...lesson learned! The story has a Big Large heart. In a world full of smalls, this story is large, Huge, Giant. The most poignant scene is where Holden is explaining Deli about the smalls of the world.
“It means that there’s nothing inside you worth notice. That to pretend to be something better than everybody else, you have to drag the good people down to your level instead of rising up to meet the bar they set.”
And when Michaela ultimately realises Holden's Golden Hour, the brilliant light that shines through him, it's a scene that brought tears to my eyes again. Michaela reaches her guilt threshold pretty soon,the strength of her soul emerging as an admirable entity ❤
I have to tell y'all. My UTMOST FAVORITE line of the story occurs here
“What would happen if I kissed you right now, Holden Bishop?”
“We would both end up heartbroken.”
“I can live with eventually.”

OH. MY. GAWWWD! #CarpeTheFuckingDiem !

So now that you've endured my ramblings...Pick up the book! It'll change you and your perspective, you would start looking at people differently, notice the vulnerable and maybe help them a bit.
Be Large! Live Large! Forgive Large!
That’s what large people do. They’re so big and so deep and so wonderful that grudges and resentment and anything deemed ugly are crushed beneath the weight of their virtue.
Holden Bishop was a soul that would always be brilliant. He would always be striking and large.

5 "Broken Bird" stars
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October 10, 2019

After only reading a few pages of Crazy Madly Deeply by Lily White I had a moment where I thought I made a mistake in choosing this book because there was something so different about the way the story was told.

I wasn’t sure if I would able to connect with the characters in the way they deserved. But something about the unfolding story kept me going and going … I passed my 3 chapter rule and continued to read.

Getting drawn into the plot I experienced the hurt and anger of the leads. I suffered with them and I was shocked how the story developed. At the outskirts of my mind I am reminded of another story that might have been totally different yet in a way expressed the same devastation to me. That story was “Split” by J.B. Salsbury and if you read that Book I am pretty sure you can imagine where my mind is going.

I am not sure actually what or how much I can tell you about this plot because I went into it blindly not knowing anything except the Blurb and I would recommend to other readers to do the same.

Just be prepared for it to be a darker
Be prepared for it to hurt
Because you won’t be prepared for what will happen


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Profile Image for Laura Lee.
948 reviews153 followers
March 4, 2018
Crazy Madly Deeply
By: Lily White
5 Large Stars

When I get a Lily White book to read, I get the tingly feelings because I know she is going to test me in one way or another. With Crazy Madly Deeply, she tested my emotions. In fact, I’m still rocking in the corner.

With that being said though, snag this book, read this book and savor the words one by one. Not only is there a fantastic story being told but like most of Lily’s books, there is an underlying story being told.

Holden has been labelled the Freak.
Michaela is the perfect image of the All-American teenager.

You are either

Holden is most definitely Large.
No matter what happens, no matter how much you whittle them down, they will grow large again.

Michaela is Small.
They’ve had it so easy that there aren’t enough memories and tragedies and victories inside them to fill them and make them bigger.

When these two come together, it’s not easy, it’s not pretty, it’s not fluffy pandas with rainbow hearts. It’s rough, it’s hard, it’s an emotional journey.

Lily White wrote an excellent book that flowed perfectly, cracked my heart wide open and left me totally satisfied after closing my kindle on the last page.

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Profile Image for Philomena Callan Cheekypee.
3,907 reviews396 followers
March 14, 2018
I’ve learnt from reading previous books by this author that I need to set time aside to read in one sitting as I’m always reluctant to put down once I’ve started. As soon as I had an afternoon free I grabbed a bar of chocolate and started reading.

I didn’t just read this book, I felt it. I felt as if the author smashed my heart into smithereens and slowly put it together. As you can see I’m not going to go into the storyline. All I’ll say is I highly recommend you jump into this blind and feel the story.

A truly amazing read with an original storyline and some great believable characters. I’m so looking forward to reading more from this author.
Profile Image for Nadine Bookaholic.
3,564 reviews367 followers
March 14, 2018
If you haven't read any of Lily White's books before I highly recommend starting with this one. I was recently turned onto Lily White's books (September 2017) and I must admit that I am a fan, especially of her Dark Romances which is what I have read until this little gem. Crazy Madly Deeply was a gut wrenching read, which totally broke my heart. From the very first page I was pulled in and Holden held my heart until well after I finished the book. This story was so very different from others that I have read by Lily White but honestly I'll take her stories anyway she wants to write them, her brilliance comes through in each and every page.

You can see my full review along with a #giveaway here:
Profile Image for TeriLyn.
1,344 reviews387 followers
March 20, 2018
**Crazy Madly Deeply generously provided by the publisher via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.**

4 "But I was different." Stars

My first Lily White book and it didn't disappoint. Crazy Madly Deeply hinges itself on the edgy tale of Holden Bishop and the tragedies he sustains in his young adult life. Broken into parts White shows us the before, during, and after the circumstances that have shaped this man. While there is a love story woven into these pages I find myself more enamored with the tragic story of this boy and the romance being a side effect of his own miraculous journey.

Holden Bishop has a very distinct view of the world around him. He understands deeper than the shallow circumstances he's surrounded by and thrust into. There's a shining brilliance to Holden that borders on madness. When someone finally delves into the core of his soul it starts to unravel the madness to let only brilliance filter out. A lot happens as far as plot in this story and an unraveling is the best way I have to describe it. There's a lot of pieces that twist and turn keeping readers on the edge of their seat. It's a dark story, full of grit and honesty from a lost boy worth saving. Lily White's writing here was impressive here as a first reader of hers. They way is able to hook readers without giving everything away and slowly filtering new details into her story. I enjoyed Crazy Madly Deeply and felt each emotional piece of Holden's story within it's pages.
Profile Image for Michelle.
552 reviews42 followers
March 5, 2018

Crazy Madly Deeply is something completely different from Lily White, it is not dark or scary it is a heart breaker that will make you cry many times throughout.

This storyline will have you gripped, make you sad in parts, the tears will flow, the romance is hot and you will fall in love with Holden, his family and Michaela.

The character I love hard from this book is Angela she made me laugh so many times, a true friend, she is real and will stand by your side through thick & thin.

Sometime we judge a book by it's glossy cover but once you go deeper a world of unknown treasures can be found.

A must one click for lovers of true romance, a story that will give you all the feels of heartbreak, hate, love and maybe you will see the best in people you wrongly judge.
Profile Image for Dirty Dayna.
1,685 reviews97 followers
November 7, 2018
4 Small Stars

this book is about Holden and the horrible things he had to endure because no one opened their eyes. This story is beautiful, raw and creative. I really never connected with the main female Michaela. I don't think her smallness ever went away but it was just accepted. and maybe its a bias .. I don't think you can go from small to big so quickly. I also think some aspects needed more explanation. I mean truly what happened?? I mean I don't think the what happened is really necessary but it seemed so brushed under the rug. I wanted to love this book I did. It had some deep emotional moments and good life lessons. But it ended up a bit smaller than I wanted. I can't wait to read this author again because I can see she does have a way with her audience and capturing attentions.

It's too late for me to love you.
It's too late to admit I was wrong.


but the part I loved of this book... it showed just how real love is... and its not rainbows and butterflies.
Profile Image for Karen - Kazza's Books Blog .
636 reviews32 followers
September 1, 2022
Lily White certknow how to write a book, weave a story and be able to dig deep into your heart and squeeze the life out of it. This is how I felt while readin Crazy Madly Deeply. Sure it was different from her other books but make no mistakes Ms White is so versatile.

I fell in love with Holden. I felt like I was sucked into his life and was experiencing his life with him. At times I was to scared to turn the page as I was worried with what was going to happen next. It has all the feels, sadness, joy, love, heartache, and not just revenge but justice. My emotions were all over the place. I was reaching for the tissues and that is extremely rare for me.

I will shout it from the roof tops for everyone to read this book. Emerse yourself in it and savour every page and written word. It is a Top 10 read for me in 2018.
Holden's story will stay with me for a long time. He touched my soul.
Profile Image for Chelsea .
631 reviews87 followers
April 8, 2018
4 Stars

I cannot in my wildest imagination think that this book was really written by Ms. Lily White. Especially since the first book that I've read from her was Her Master's Courtesan. And it was BDSM Dark.

This in the other hand felt more like a YA. But it's nothing like a sweet YA read. I only categorized it that way based on their age. And besides, it was so much more than that. It has a heavy theme that involves social discrimination, tragedy, abuse and of course love.

There was this twist that I really didn't saw it coming. I was shocked after reading it because I wasn't given any clue. And it broke my heart all the more.

I didn't expect to really love Angela's character. She proves to not only act as Holden's boss but also as a friend. Several side characters also plays a role in helping our MCs.

There were some parts that drag a little, while I was itching to know what's next. But it wasn't that bad.

173 reviews59 followers
October 25, 2018
5 "Holden"🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
My first book of this author's.
Lily white has successfully managed to make me cry with her writing, very few author can do that to me.
This book is devastatingly good.
The plot is so strong and phenomenally written, all the characters beautifully constructed, their pain, grief, sorrow, love,hate wonderfully portrayed.
This is really a great read.

[[People are so quick to throw the word ‘love’ around as if it were something distinct and separate from themselves. As if it were simple, basic, or exact. They confuse it with lust. They confuse it with romance. They confuse it with the simple interest they have to learn about another human being. But in that confusion, they lessen what it really means.

If you truly love someone, you feel them in every cell of your body. Whether they’re right next to you, or a million miles away, that person is still the air you breathe, is still the first thought on your mind, is still so indelibly embedded in your heart that to lose them is to lose a piece of yourself. Love doesn’t distinguish between a mother, a son, a sister, a brother, a father, or the woman a man eventually calls his wife. It’s not interchangeable. It’s not a word that has alternate definitions. It exists or it does not. And once it exists, truly exists, it never goes away.

Romance, lust, friendship, attraction, interest - those words carry alternate meanings, they can be applied and stripped away once the honeymoon is over, but love never falters, not in divorce, not in anger, not even in death.

It NEVER goes away.

And that’s what makes it so dangerous.]]
Profile Image for Tricia Bartley.  #AuthorStalker.
1,259 reviews89 followers
March 6, 2018
Well this book just blew me away!!!

What a perfect title for Lily White's newest release
Crazy Madly Deeply

Cuz this is definitely what you are going to feel while reading CRAZY MADLY DEEPLY!!

I'm just blown away!!! Wait..I think I already said that. lol But it is sooo true!!

"He was the King of Freaks because he wasn't like everyone else.

He lived on the wrong side of the tracks.

Kids at school shunned him, they thought he was Goth. He wasn't like the rest of the kids at school.

People thought he was insane.


Deserving of a padded cell.

But he was just a boy who wanted to leave their crazy town. He just refused to bow down, refused to fall in line with what was expected of him.

He cared deeply about his sister and then one day he caught one of the boys doing something to his sister that made him mad!!

Andd now this is where you get to pick up this book and find out what the Hell happened. You will get to fall Crazy Madly Deeply in love with this story along with all the rest of us. You just have to find out did he get revenge? What other things do you learn about him? Does someone help him out?

5 iScream Cones from me!!! I think I will be reeling from this book for a long while. Absolutely loved it!!
Profile Image for Kim Sutton.
597 reviews9 followers
March 8, 2018
What an absolutely amazing story! Crazy Madly Deeply blew me away! Such an amazing story filled with some brilliant twists. I loved Holden and Michaela and their stories were ever so emotional, it's a book that will stay with me forever. It's a mixture of edge of your seat suspense and romance, that made me tear up and get angry. Seriously I went through every emotion reading this story.

I went into this one blind having no idea what it was about, it's very different from any of the books I've previously read by this author, and now my new favourite of hers! I definitely recommend going into this one blind, as you do not want anything spoiling for you!
Cannot recommend this one enough! Five stars!
Profile Image for Kahea.
2,067 reviews111 followers
March 8, 2018
***5 ‘Large’ Stars***

I know I’ve used this term many, many times when describing how I felt about a book, and, if I am absolutely honest, is a major understatement when being applied to Crazy Madly Deeply, but holy hell what an emotional rollercoaster this book was. One moment I was all kinds of needing to gut someone with a spoon ragey, only to get the swoons the next moment even as my heartbroke. It really was a vicious cycle that was on a constant loop right up until the bitter end when the author put the pieces back in some semblance of order and contentment.

Where to start with Holden and Michaela? Hows about at the end and how much I adored them and I did, in the end. The beginning...let’s just say they ended up on opposite ends of the spectrum, but having an understanding of why, even if I didn’t totally like it, had me waiting for the catalyst that would change them all, and what a moment it was. That moment brought about a domino effect and while the changes took time and it wasn’t always pretty, the truths that came out from it and how they dealt with them not only made them both stronger, but brought them closer and in the end was definitely worth it all.

This book was an experience. It is so much more than I expected that using too many words could possibly ruin it for others. The romance aspect was something of a slow build, but as it was closely tied to both Holden and Michaela’s evolutions it totally worked for me. There are quite a few issues the author tackles with brutal honesty in this story that some may be uncomfortable with, but they are necessary to the storyline. In the end I adored Crazy Madly Deeply, I devoured it, it slayed me on all levels and I cannot wait to see what the author has in store for us next!

~ Copy provided by The Next Step PR & voluntarily reviewed ~
314 reviews
March 16, 2018
Starting this book. I was sucked straight in. I loved Holden. I despised Jack Thorn and his cronies. I even had little sympathy for Michaela . She did not take control of her life. She never stood against the crowd. I went from angry to extremely sad. This was a story with intense feelings. I wanted to read it quickly to get my answers
Yet savour the pages over time.
My heart was bleeding. I felt hurt. I felt anger. I felt sadness. I wanted revenge.
Truly a tear jerking read. The ending was perfect. Lily your genius equals my book hangover.
Profile Image for Simii Khanom.
333 reviews
March 18, 2018
I’m so used to reading disturbingly dark romance from Lily White that I was shocked to hear she was coming out with something different. However, this contemporary romance was a pleasant surprise.
It was absolutely gut wrenching, I was in tears during the few chapters in as well as near the final few chapters. But it was so beautifully told and the epilogue had me smiling in tears.

I’m always going to be a fan of Ms. White’s dark romance but now I’m open to exploring more different genres from her after reading this gem❤️
Profile Image for Romance Readers Retreat.
2,346 reviews216 followers
March 14, 2018
5 Stars

Crazy Madly Deeply is not your typical Lily White book. It is an emotional contemporary romance about two vastly different people that are different, but similar in all the ways that matter. It reminds us that crazy is a subjective term and things are never as simple as they seem on the surface. This story pulled hard at my heartstrings and featured the wonderful writing and unique characters she is so well known for.

Holden is know as a freak, the crazy poor boy who is not like everyone else. He see the world differently than most and is ridiculed and tormented because of it. Michaela is the perfect rich princess everyone aspires to be like. She tows the line and does what is expected of her. When these two opposites collide, their worlds get turned upside down and you quickly realize looks can be deceiving and that a person's character and heart are so much deeper than anything visible on the surface. This is one of those books that are best appreciated as you read them. You shouldn't know too much going in so you can be along for the crazy, desperate, painful, emotional and beautiful ride Holden and Michaela embark on. I wasn't sure going into this what to expect as I'm so used to Lily's much darker works, but I was impressed by how well she managed to move to a more contemporary romance setting. Note that there are still some darker themes in this story, it wouldn't be a Lily White book if it was all sunshine and rainbows. This is the kind of book that slowly works its way into your chest and sets up residence there long after you have read the last words.
Profile Image for Rosemarie McKenzie.
395 reviews9 followers
March 6, 2018
"We called him crazy, when in truth, we were the crazy ones. Crazy for recognizing a good person among us. Crazy for judging him when we the ones who should have been judged. Crazy for so needlessly hurting a man that wanted nothing from us but the respect to let him live in peace. Crazy for not seeing that he had more raw talent in his pinky finger than any of us had in our bodies. But maybe that's the way it is for shallow people"

I don't only love a story that I can feel deep down in my heart but i love to feel it deep within my soul and that's just the being of how "Crazy Madly Deeply" made me feel. This book was everything you guys. Lily White painted a well executed picture for her readers, this book is by far one of my favorite reads this year. This story will most definitely leave your heart in a big ole puddle on the floor.
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