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344 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1998
I speak Japanese the way a bear dances. It's not that the bear dances well that impresses people, it's the fact the bear dances at all.And so we accompany the author on his circa 340 page journey. In its original form it was a 433 page journey, but the publishers forced him to edit to suit the paperback format. The reader might be mistaken for thinking he didn't quite hit his target, given the minute print (in y edition), but there wasn't much in this book that was superfluous.
"Cow sex," said Tomio, his eyes shining with glee. [...]
"Are you a doctor?" I asked. "An animal doctor?"
"Oh, no." He brushed this aside with a show of modesty.
"But you help animals have babies?"
"Yes, Yes. Cows. Sex. Babies."
He was an artificial inseminator. "My cows," he said, pointing to one herd, and then another. I almost wept for joy. "Do you have any children of your own?" I asked.
"Oh, yes. I have three."
"And you, Ah, had them naturally?
He laughed uproariously over this. "Of course, of course."
"Are you dangerous?"
"I said, Are you dangerous?"
I wasn't sure I heard her correctly. "Who? me? No, I'm not dangerous at all."
"All right, then," she said. "You can get in."
And that was how I met the unsinkable, irrepressible, wholly undeniable Kikumi Otsugi, a woman who believed in bad men, but not bad dishonest men. I had given her my word of honor that I would not harm her, and she was satisfied."
Thoroughly enjoyable, and worth seeking out for a quick amusement.