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Someone I Used to Know

Patty Blount (Goodreads Author)

4.31 · Rating details · 477 ratings · 156 reviews

TRIGGER WARNING: Boys will be boys is never an excuse.

It’s been two years since the night that changed Ashley’s life. Two years since she was raped by her brother’s teammate. And a year since she sat in a court and watched as he was given a slap-on-the-wrist sentence. But the years have done nothing to stop the pain or lessen the crippling panic attacks that make her feel ...more

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Paperback, 384 pages

Published August 7th 2018 by Sourcebooks Fire

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· 477 ratings · 156 reviews

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Jul 14, 2018 (Bern) Mom to 2 Posh Lil Divas rated it really liked it

Shelves: ya-books, netgalley, 2018

Someone I Used to Know offers an honest & difficult look at the traumatic effects on life & family after sexual assault

It's really difficult to review a book like this. Rape is NOT an easy topic to think about, discuss or read about. It's also not an easy topic to write about Patty Blount has my respect and due credit for this book. Sexual violence permeates our culture at alarming rates so it is a topic we need to be aware of. Did you know that every 98 seconds an American is sexually ...more

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Aug 31, 2018 Sana rated it it was amazing

Shelves: badass-chicks, contemporary, daddies, i-have-a-heart, im-all-kinds-of-shook, young-adult, romance

what an amazing fucking book, i'm so shook right now.

this book made me so angry (in a very good way) to the point where i was actually fucking shaking and trying to control myself like akcnjdjcn what a fucking moving and impactful book

Ashley's story is brutal, real and honest. patty blount doesn't sugar coat shit and that is so fucking important.

Its currently 2 am and i really need sleep so I'll make a quick list about why this book is fucking awesome.
-rape is never the victims fault. Stop bl what an amazing fucking book, i'm so shook right now.

this book made me so angry (in a very good way) to the point where i was actually fucking shaking and trying to control myself like akcnjdjcn what a fucking moving and impactful book

Ashley's story is brutal, real and honest. patty blount doesn't sugar coat shit and that is so fucking important.

Its currently 2 am and i really need sleep so I'll make a quick list about why this book is fucking awesome.
-rape is never the victims fault. Stop blaming and questioning the victim. it doesn't matter what they were wearing, whether they were drinking, it is not their fault. this is continuously mentioned in the book!!!
-men are also victims of rape.
-therapy, communication and getting help for whatever you're going through is a big focus in this book and i freaking loved how normal and casual it was in this story. talking to someone about what you're going through really helps. talking to a counselor, therapist, an adult or a friend is so frequent and positive in this book. Im crying.
-family issues and how miscommunication and lack of communication really can hurt relationships
-talk about how people should always stand up for the right thing and help someone in danger.
-how women are human beings and should be treated as such. not a piece of meat for you to disgustingly talk about or joke about.
-how normal it's become in our society for men to continuously harass women, touch them without their permission and force themselves on women. there is so much in depth conversations that take place in this book about how men/boys get mad for a girl saying no to them. a girl shouldn't live in a society where she constantly feels unsafe. A girl should be able to dress however she wants without having to worry about men coming at her. men need to control their desires. Control themselves
-the anxiety rep is amazing.
-the love interest is an actual cinnamon roll
-Ashley goes through so much shit and comes out so much stronger at the end. She's such a strong but flawed character i love her.

there's so much more that happens in this book. I literally can't stress how important this is. please read it.

trigger warnings for rape, anxiety attacks, a lot of sexism, and sexual harassment ...more

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Feb 16, 2019 may ❀ rated it really liked it

Shelves: 300-pgs, aaaaaaaaaa, binged, contemporary, ded, kickass-heroine, my-heart, real-problems, standalones, tears-so-many-tears

book #5 done for the contemporary-a-thon under the challenge of: a dark/emotional/hard-hitting contemporary ✔

just like patty blount's previous book, Some Boys, this book is phenomenal

reading books on the topic of rape culture is always so painful but my goodness, is it so bloody important.

- patty blount's writing is raw and gripping. you feel the characters pain, you feel their inner dialogue, you feel their self loathing. for the most part, she intertwines her main message with the overall pl ...more

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Jun 16, 2018 Dianne rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: abuse, arc-read, bullying, dark-fiction, family-saga, great-dialogue, gritty, must-read, netgalley, own

An innocent young girl is raped as part of a demented game, her life twisted into a mangled parody of normal and society is guilty of continuing the emotional and psychological deed in ignorant or self-righteous bliss. One family devolves into a quagmire of devastation, rage and unconsciously mimics society’s callous opinion that boys will be boys, while passing judgment on a fourteen year old girl’s “guilt.” It will take two long and painful years for the complete implosion and now the question An innocent young girl is raped as part of a demented game, her life twisted into a mangled parody of normal and society is guilty of continuing the emotional and psychological deed in ignorant or self-righteous bliss. One family devolves into a quagmire of devastation, rage and unconsciously mimics society’s callous opinion that boys will be boys, while passing judgment on a fourteen year old girl’s “guilt.” It will take two long and painful years for the complete implosion and now the question is, can they find a way back to finally support each other, and help Ashley heal?

If you read nothing else, every man, woman and young adult MUST read SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW by Patty Blount. Although fictional, it is a scathing and raw indictment of a world where sex sells, “dirty jokes” are told and beauty is a perceived license for demeaning and condescending behavior.

Told through the voices of Ashley, the rape survivor and her self-centered brother, Derek, this tale is meant to make people uncomfortable, to make us feel guilty, to open our eyes. For parents who say, this is too raw for my teen, think again, this is EXACTLY what EVERY teen needs to read, male or female. A court verdict does not end the pain of the survivor, long after we are on to the next news bite, the cancer continues to grow, for everyone touched.

Devastating, dark and brutally raw, this gut-wrenching read is filled with triggers, truths and rightfully puts the blame solidly on “the good people of our culture.” And aren’t we ALL good people?? Buy a copy for a friend, a family member and make sure every library you know orders several. Perhaps this should be required reading in school, certainly more relevant and timely than those "classics."

I received a complimentary ARC edition from Sourcebooks Fire!

Publisher: Sourcebooks Fire (August 7, 2018)
Publication Date: August 7, 2018
Genre: YA | Sexual Abuse | Family
Print Length: 384 pages
Available from: Amazon | Barnes & Noble
For Reviews, Giveaways, Fabulous Book News, follow: http://tometender.blogspot.com

...more

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Oct 24, 2018 mich rated it liked it

Shelves: serious-subject-matter, ya, sports, romance-is-meh, oops-i-read-out-of-order, it-wasn-t-all-bad, good-try-tho, first-read-from-this-author, contemporary, disappointing

Sometimes when I read a really great book in a certain genre or about a particular subject matter, I just want to keep reading more books like it.

That's how I felt right after finishing The Female of the Species. It was a look at contemporary rape culture in a pretty jacked up way, and it sorta led me to this book.

This one was. . . okay. We get a really good look at the aftermath through the eyes of the MC Ashley, and her character was fantastic.

I liked the idea of throwing in the fallout of ...more

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Aug 06, 2018 Robyn rated it it was amazing

Two years ago, Ashley Lawrence, a freshman in high school, was raped by a senior football player during Homecoming week. Since then, it has driven a wedge between her and her brother, Derek. They were once very close, but now Ashley hates him and can’t even stand to look at him. Derek is carrying around his own guilt about the night of the rape and feels partly responsible for what happened to Ashley. With both Ashley and Derek at odds, the rest of their family is feeling the strain. Can Ashley Two years ago, Ashley Lawrence, a freshman in high school, was raped by a senior football player during Homecoming week. Since then, it has driven a wedge between her and her brother, Derek. They were once very close, but now Ashley hates him and can’t even stand to look at him. Derek is carrying around his own guilt about the night of the rape and feels partly responsible for what happened to Ashley. With both Ashley and Derek at odds, the rest of their family is feeling the strain. Can Ashley and Derek ever learn to forgive each other so that their family can start the healing process?

Someone I Used To Know really packs an emotion punch in regards to rape culture and the term “boys will be boys.” It is a shame that till this day society often places blame on the victim. Why were you wearing that outfit? Why were you with him alone? Why were you walking at night by yourself? She was asking for it. She is lying. We have all heard these statements before. When a woman is raped why is she the one always targeted as if she did something wrong? If you want blame someone, blame the rapist. They are the ones at fault. Women are harassed every single day by men. Sometimes men don't even realize what they are doing is wrong. Cat calling a woman as she is walking down the street, touching someone inappropriately as a joke, listening to your friends talking about what they want to do to a woman even if they are joking is still wrong. Most people call it “locker room” talk or boys will be boys which really goes to show how society views rape culture.

Ashley tackles a lot of these issues when she returns back to high school. She is determine to tell her story and make more people aware of rape culture and what we can do to stop it. Ashley really shines here in her determination. Yes, she is still triggered and has anxiety attacks, but she wants to make a difference. Ashley is such a realistic character and I love how Patty Blount shows her day to day struggles and never sugarcoats anything. Ashley as a character is raw and uncensored and I can really see how she grew as a person through the story.

Derek was also an interesting character for me and sometimes, in the very beginning, I hated how he treated Ashley, but at the same time, I can also see how much he craved his independence and wanted to do things with friends that didn’t include his sister. I also had to remind myself that he was still very much just a teenager and acted like a teenager. But, I can see how traumatized he was after his sister’s rape. That moment where he finally gets it and understands that what happened to Ashley wasn’t her fault. You can feel the guilt he feels for his treatment of her. He really has the most growth in this story and I was proud of him for finally owning up to what he did and the ways he went about fixing it.

Someone I used To Know is raw and uncensored. It is a story that every high school student, both boys and girls, needs to read and understand how rape culture affects our society. This story tackles real life issues and is told in a brutally honest way. Patty Blount has such a knack of pulling out every emotion in you such as tears, sadness, anger, and finally relief for characters in a story I have come to treasure. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. This is a five star read and one that will remain on my keeper shelf.
...more

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Aug 08, 2018 Anna rated it it was amazing

I voluntarily read and reviewed an copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.
Thanks to the author for providing a copy of this book via Netgalley

NO means NO

Harassment and mysoginistic jokes are not funny

This is powerful read. I wish this kind of books they studied at school. We need this books to change our rape culture.

I'm a new fan of this author. It's my second book but I'm looking for read more.

I loved everything about this book: the plot, the family dinamics, MCs and SCs, auth ...more

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Jul 13, 2018 PinkAmy loves books, cats and naps rated it it was ok

***Thanks to NetGalley for providing me a complimentary copy of SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW by Patty Blount in exchange for my honest review.***

I wish I didn’t have to write this review. I’m a Patty Blount fan and preordered SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW as I do all her YA novels. When I received notification that I was approved for an ARC, I was so excited.

Blount’s writing is as appealing as ever. I love how she strings words together with beauty and ease. Initially, I was drawn into Ashley’s fears and pai ...more

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Aug 09, 2018 Elaine rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: review-of-the-year, 2018, adult, authors-to-look-out-for, contemporary, favorites, high-school, inspirational, netgalley, small-community

I can sum up my review of this book with two simple words of advice to you, "Read it!" You really don't need to read more of my review than that, but I'll still write more to let you know why those two words....

This is an emotive story, dealing with the past and present relationships particularly between a brother and sister, Derek and Ashley, and most especially after she was raped by her brother's friend and teammate. It is a heart wrenching story portraying the feelings of guilt, betrayal and I can sum up my review of this book with two simple words of advice to you, "Read it!" You really don't need to read more of my review than that, but I'll still write more to let you know why those two words....

This is an emotive story, dealing with the past and present relationships particularly between a brother and sister, Derek and Ashley, and most especially after she was raped by her brother's friend and teammate. It is a heart wrenching story portraying the feelings of guilt, betrayal and pressure on the family and peers as well as the victim. It also highlights how societal expectations and excuses, rape culture and more really need to change - as it says in the story, "Does anybody ever say 'Oh, it's just extremists being extremists.' No! So why is 'boys will be boys' an excuse?" It is a story about striving to change these attitudes, moving forward, forgiveness and love.

The story is superbly written, giving an insight into the difficult and traumatic impact of sexual assault on the family of the victim and the attitudes portrayed by peers and the community towards them all. It deals with difficult issues but does so within the context of the story that highlights how society still puts so much emphasis on the victim being the one to blame - wearing provocative clothing, attitude, etc - and not enough on the assailant for accepting that No means No. The character development really brings them to life, encouraging the reader to relate and react to their experiences and making them feel real.

I really think this story should be on the shelves of every high school and read by all students, their parents and their teachers, regardless of gender. It shows how rape culture permeates society, it is a brutally honest, thought provoking and evocative read. It may well not be a comfortable read but sometimes that's just what's needed to change attitudes and expectations and for many that change needs to start in schools. For me, this book is a keeper, an emotive roller coaster and a real eye opener.

I requested and was given a copy of this book, via NetGalley. This is my honest review of this amazing, thought provoking book after choosing to read it. ...more

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Jul 19, 2018 Adele Shea rated it it was amazing

I'll be honest when I say this, I don't think any review I give Someone I Used To Know would be able to do it justice.

No one wants to read or talk about rape but it must be done to bring awareness wherever and as much as possible.

Rape does not just affect the victim it affects the people around the victim, their family and friends. This book hits on this and really brings it home.

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Sep 08, 2018 Erin rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: contemporary-fiction, young-adult

A powerful and moving book that puts misogyny and rape culture under a microscope, and observes the devastating effects of rape and sexual assault on not just a survivor, but their loved ones as well.

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Aug 10, 2018 Blodeuedd Finland rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: audiobook, fiction, ya

This one was hard listening at. I just wanted to rage against the world! But it is a book that you have to listen to/read. Even better, a book to read at school and discuss.

The book takes place in the present, but also in the past, 1 year ago, 2 years ago, and sometimes we go further back to look at the relationship between brother and sister, best friends, and where it went wrong.

2 years ago Ashley was raped. It was her brother's teammate, and someone she liked. That is also when she started to ...more

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Aug 08, 2018 Michelle rated it liked it

**You can see this full review and more at Book Briefs: https://bookbriefs.net**
Someone I used to Know by Patty Blount is a young adult contemporary novel that deals with a serious issue. Someone I used to Know looks at the aftermath of dealing with your life after a sexual assault. One of the things I admire most about author Patty Blount is that she is not afraid to deal with tough issues. Someone I used to Know is not a fun read by any stretch of the imagination, nor is it a light, breezy sto ...more

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Jul 20, 2018 Kate (beautifulbookland) rated it it was amazing

Shelves: net-galley, 5-stars

This is not an easy book to read; there were times where I felt so angry, so sad and horrified because while the characters in this book are fictional, the subject matter is not. Rape is something that so many people experience, and it doesn’t only affect the people who were attacked, it can tear apart families, ruin friendships and relationships.

Someone I Used to Know touches upon all of this, and more - rape culture is dissected, toxic masculinity is explored, and all of it is so powerful tha This is not an easy book to read; there were times where I felt so angry, so sad and horrified because while the characters in this book are fictional, the subject matter is not. Rape is something that so many people experience, and it doesn’t only affect the people who were attacked, it can tear apart families, ruin friendships and relationships.

Someone I Used to Know touches upon all of this, and more - rape culture is dissected, toxic masculinity is explored, and all of it is so powerful that it reduced me to tears on a number of occasions.

This book is told from two different view points; Ashley, the victim, and her brother, Derek. Derek, who told the judge in court to “go easy” on his sister’s rapist. Derek, who blamed Ashley for her attack, asking her why she didn’t stay at home.

Ashley goes from idolising her older brother, to hating him, viewing him as one of her triggers. But Derek hates himself enough for the both of them, and that hate only increases as he throws himself into his research regarding rape culture. Derek’s character arc is a total rollercoaster, because his initial responses to his sister were absolutely disgusting, but his current day chapters really showed how much he regretted his actions. It’s not like he just suddenly had a lightbulb moment, though; he continues learning about rape culture as the book goes on, and he makes mistakes along the way. But he’s willing to learn, and he tries incredibly hard to better himself.

Ashley also isn’t portrayed as the perfect, innocent victim; she has her faults, she lashes out at people she loves and shuts them out, even when her family are falling apart around her.

Like I said, Someone I Used to Know isn’t an easy book to read, but it’s worth it. The relationship between Ashley and Derek broke my heart and then made it sing; it was so real. We got snippets of them when they were younger, and how it shaped them as adults, and it really just fleshed them out; this could have been a real story based on real people. I would recommend this book to anyone.

*Thank you to the publisher for providing a free e copy in exchange for an honest review* ...more

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Aug 22, 2018 Kiki Cole rated it it was amazing

I love Patty Blount’s novels so much. They are so real and don’t sugarcoat anything. This was a sort of sequel spinoff of Some Boys which both involve rape culture and overcoming hate and rediscovering their self. I thought this book was so touching and I felt exact emotions that were described in the novel. One chapter had me wanting to get out of my bed, grab a blow horn and just shout how wrong certain things in this world are. This is also a very good gender neutral novel because it has both ...more

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Aug 16, 2018 Leslynn rated it really liked it

Shelves: 2018-reading-challenge

Copy courtesy of NetGalley

Book hangover of note

**Warning: this novel is a tear jerker of the not-pretty-crying kind.**

Rape is not a socially acceptable topic, but it's been highlighted in many books, as it should be! The way this author presented the subject was brilliant - victims, their families and their communities are vastly impacted when sexual assault occurs and this book provides amazing insight into every aspect affected.

The writing style ensured that you are captivated from the outset ...more

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Sep 09, 2018 Rebecca Akins rated it it was amazing

Shelves: best-of-the-best

TRIGGER WARNING: Rape & Anxiety Attacks

Wow, this was a powerful book. To be honest, I wasn’t sure about this book at the beginning it has a lot of back-and-forth with the timeline, and I kept getting pulled out of the story at the beginning, but I’m so glad that I continued with it. In this book, we follow two different perspectives the first one is of a girl, Ashley, who was raped two years ago and is still dealing with the trauma of the event. The other point of you we get is her brother D TRIGGER WARNING: Rape & Anxiety Attacks

Wow, this was a powerful book. To be honest, I wasn’t sure about this book at the beginning it has a lot of back-and-forth with the timeline, and I kept getting pulled out of the story at the beginning, but I’m so glad that I continued with it. In this book, we follow two different perspectives the first one is of a girl, Ashley, who was raped two years ago and is still dealing with the trauma of the event. The other point of you we get is her brother Derek who was on the same football team as his sister's rapist and did not do his best at supporting his sister and dealing with this event.

We deal with two different timelines we get scenes from the year in which the rape happened and present day which is two years later. The school Ashley goes to and where the sexual assault occurred had banned football team after Ashley’s rape, and now two years later the football team is being reinstated. Ashley has to deal with this added trigger. Derek is a freshman in college, and he’s dealing with his guilt, his lack of knowledge of rape culture, and trying to come to terms with his part in what happened with sister.

This book was done so well the topics were handled in a way that I don’t think I’ve ever read in a YA book because I find with books about sexual assault if there’s a romance aspect then the romance seems to break the reality of the sexual assault trauma. This one has two different romances; Derek has a girlfriend, and Ashley has a love interest. They are both done excellently. Sexual assault is a part of each of these romantic relationships because they’re a part of these two different people. I never once felt like the actions of the couples went against the natural progression that would occur in a relationship with someone who is a survivor or family member of a survivor of a sexual assault.

I highly recommend this book I do think it could be very triggering for someone who has experience sexual assault. There are also anxiety attacks that are described in detail. You can picture and almost feel what the character is feeling when they’re having these anxiety attacks. Those are the two things I think you should be aware of going in because they are depicted realistically.

I received an e-arc of this book through NetGalley in exchange for my honest review this in no way affects my review or rating of this book. ...more

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Aug 09, 2018 Erica Chilson rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: 5-star, wickedreads, abuse, criminal, mental-illness

I received a copy of this title to read and review for Wicked Reads

5 Riveting Stars

Young Adult age-range: 14+ plus due to content.

To be honest, I'm not entirely sure how to review Someone I Used to Know. The novel is a journey showcasing rape culture, done so with intelligence and maturity, yet written in an age-appropriate manner befitting the narrators. The author left no stone unturned, revealing every facet from just about every angle.

Multilayered, told far in the past, two years ago, on ...more

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Jul 19, 2018 Hayley rated it liked it

Shelves: netgalley, contemporary-romance

I found this book to be very interesting and very different than what I was expecting and what I'm used to. This book is all about our main character Ashley. She was raped before this book even takes place by her brothers friend. This book is all about the aftermath of the assault and how it affects everyone involved. I really enjoyed it because I liked how sad it was, everyone telling Ashley that she should get over it because it happened years ago and they need to stop punishing the other boys ...more

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Jul 18, 2018 Jannin (The Booknerd Dragon) rated it it was amazing

Shelves: arc, reviewed

***I received an ARC of this bookvia Netgalley in exchange of an honest review. This does not influence my review in any way.***

Disclaimer: I was triggered when I read this book. And because of that, I cannot guarantee that this book will be “curse-free”. If you are uncomfortable reading curses, I apologize in advance. This book has a sensitive topic, which is rape. If you are uncomfortable talking about that too, you are free to not proceed and read the review. Please read at your own risk.

L ...more

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Aug 06, 2018 Julie Parks rated it really liked it

Shelves: ya

Thank you NetGalley for introducing me to Patty Blount. She's a wonderful writer and most of her books will now end up on my TBR list.

SOMEONE I USED TO KNOW was a heavy read. I think the message is strong and it's good to fight this cause. But you need insides to get through a whole length of a book on the subject of rape.

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Mar 05, 2018 Bookworm LLC rated it really liked it

Shelves: cindy-bookshelf

Someone I Used to Know is a story about a gal who was raped by her brother's football teammate and how it has affected not only her life but the life of her entire family. It shows you how the family dynamics are affected and how this family really struggles on how to help their daughter and sister. Very compelling and thought provoking.

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Apr 08, 2018 Jesse rated it it was amazing

Shelves: young-adult, grabby-hands, siblings, arc, girl-power, glgb2018

A blistering deconstruction of rape culture shown through the dissolving connection of two siblings post sexual assault. Timely, visceral and devastating, while ultimately hopeful.

Thank you to Edelweiss and Sourcebooks Fire for the ARC.

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Mar 25, 2018 Rachael rated it really liked it

A must read for everyone about rape culture and toxic masculinity.

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Aug 29, 2018 Kelly rated it really liked it

Shelves: read-in-2018, reviewed

Smashing the patriarchy, one Pinterest board at a time!

(Full disclosure: I received a free e-ARC for review through NetGalley. Trigger warning for rape, obviously.)

“Ms. Lawrence,” he says, taking off his glasses. “I understand how you feel—”
“Really?” I snap back. “How did you get over your rape?”

"The reason men like Ariel Castro and Elliot Rodger and Aaron Persky exist is because men like us never called them out on their bullshit the first time they showed it.”

THEN: Ashley Lawrence and her old ...more

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Sep 12, 2018 Brandee (un)Conventional Bookworms rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: 2018-new-release, arc-review, contemporary, netgalley, young-adult

This book. This book is profound, touching, thought-provoking, heartbreaking, heartwarming, and should be required reading...for everyone.

***
Every once in awhile a young adult book comes along that is so profound I want to shout from the rooftop about its greatness. Someone I Used to Know is such a book. Revolving around rape culture in America, it depicts the impact of rape on the victim, the victim's family, and the community. Blount did this in a way that was relevant, meaningful, and packed This book. This book is profound, touching, thought-provoking, heartbreaking, heartwarming, and should be required reading...for everyone.

***
Every once in awhile a young adult book comes along that is so profound I want to shout from the rooftop about its greatness. Someone I Used to Know is such a book. Revolving around rape culture in America, it depicts the impact of rape on the victim, the victim's family, and the community. Blount did this in a way that was relevant, meaningful, and packed an emotional punch.

Ashley, a high school freshman at the time, was raped. By a senior football player. In an effort to score points in a "game" the players historically participated in during homecoming week. Following the rape, the football program was cancelled. Now, two years later, it's been re-instituted with a new coach. Ashley must decide how to deal with the feelings this evokes. She has to decide if she's going to continue being a victim or fight back.

One of the things I most appreciated about Someone I Used to Know was how accurately Blount portrayed the football culture. Being from Texas (originally) I understand that it's a form of religion in a large part of the U.S. and the players and coaches are deified. They're also excused of a lot with the "boys will be boys" justification. While Blount provided statistics showing sexual assault and rape is more prevalent during the football season, especially on college campuses, she also showed how rape culture is ingrained in so many elements of our society. She offered a broader definition of rape culture, how many of us don't think twice about some things (like jokes or advertisements), and things we can do to try to affect change.

Blount's portrayal of how rape affects not only the victim but others as well is the other thing I most admired about this story. She drew these amazing and flawed characters in Ashley, her brothers and parents, and her friends. She detailed how the rape and its aftermath affected them all, as well as the community. And then Blount developed them so richly - ALL of them - to show their emotional growth and the way they determined to deal, in a healthy way, with all they'd been struggling with.

I found the character growth in Ashley and her brother, Derek, most meaningful since they'd been close when they were younger but had drifted apart in recent years and then were torn apart following the rape. Ashley was so strong despite not considering herself that way. She chose to be a part of the change she wanted to see, to stand up for herself and others. Derek also chose to affect change. I liked that the ways in which he chose to do it were ways that would help Ashley, and others like her, but he did these things for himself...to prove, if only to himself, he was a better man. It was profound and a profoundly inspiring experience.

Someone I Used to Know was my first read from Blount but it WILL NOT be my last. (In fact I already have Some Boys lined up.) It's a book everyone should read because it'll make you think. And I hope, if you do read it, you'll find it as inspiring as I did.

**I received a complimentary copy from the publisher via Netgalley. This did not affect my rating and my review is provided voluntarily.** ...more

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Aug 08, 2018 Leslie aka StoreyBook Reviews rated it it was amazing

Shelves: 2018, books-to-review

This is a powerful book that takes a look into the life of a victim and her family after a rape. We all may know someone that has been a victim (or perhaps it is you?) and that we could never fully understand what that person went through before, during, or after the incident. And it doesn't just affect the victim, it affects the family as they help the victim work out their fears regarding the incident.

There are so many good things to write about this book it is hard to know where to start. I t This is a powerful book that takes a look into the life of a victim and her family after a rape. We all may know someone that has been a victim (or perhaps it is you?) and that we could never fully understand what that person went through before, during, or after the incident. And it doesn't just affect the victim, it affects the family as they help the victim work out their fears regarding the incident.

There are so many good things to write about this book it is hard to know where to start. I think the biggest impact this book had on me was taking a look into how being a victim of rape or sexual assault can affect the victim for years after the event. It can be the smallest thing that triggers a reaction and memory of the event. I never really understood what a person might go through but this book really opened my eyes. Ashley is 14/15 when this happened to her and many of her reactions, while valid, also reflect her age. She is angry at everyone, even those trying to help her. Some comments made by friends and family were misunderstood and instead of asking for clarification, she just shuts that person out of her life. At the same time, she doesn't understand the guilt that her family feels about the situation and not being able to protect her. There are many situations that she has to work her way through to understand and accept how others feel or their reactions in the past. She does grow over the two years that this book spans and realizes that she doesn't have to let this event traumatize her at every turn. No she won't forget the incident, but she can take control back and move forward.

Ashley's brothers, Justin & Derek, also have their own battles to fight regarding the incident. They are not handling it as well and they might have thought, but it turns into character building for them, especially Derek since he feels the most responsible. His POV was sometimes hard to read only because of the guilt you could feel in his words especially when attending a rally on his college campus. Ashley's parents are also trying to balance protecting Ashley without smothering her.

I appreciated all of the links to organizations that support victims and families of sexual assault. The author even recommends searching the hashtag #MeToo to read stories by those assaulted.

I would have liked to have a bit more development of Sebastian and Brittany since these characters play a pivotal role in Ashley and Derek's lives.

Overall a book that made a huge impact on my thought process and view of victims of assault. ...more

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Jul 26, 2018 Sydney (sydneysshelves) West rated it really liked it

Shelves: 2018-reads, mental-illness, netgalley, ya-coming-of-age

I’m here today with another book review. Today’s book review is for Someone That I Used to Know by Patty Blount which came out August 7th. I got my copy for free from netgalley for an honest review. So Thanks Sourcebooks! Let’s dive into what I thought.
The plot follows two main characters. The first being Ashley , who was raped two years ago. The second pov is her brother Derek. The plot delves into rape culture and just the way we as a society stand by and do nothing in the face of rape charge I’m here today with another book review. Today’s book review is for Someone That I Used to Know by Patty Blount which came out August 7th. I got my copy for free from netgalley for an honest review. So Thanks Sourcebooks! Let’s dive into what I thought.
The plot follows two main characters. The first being Ashley , who was raped two years ago. The second pov is her brother Derek. The plot delves into rape culture and just the way we as a society stand by and do nothing in the face of rape charges. This is obviously a really important topic and very applicable to today’s atmosphere. We tend to say “Oh Boys will be boys” instead of dealing with the fact that someone we know is capable of rape. However, while this story is needed and very powerful, there came a point when it felt like the author was just trying to force her views on her readers rather than spark a discussion. This was especially annoying during the diatribe against high school football. I rolled my eyes a lot at how unreasonable the main character was being. I gave plot 3.5/5 Stars
Like I mentioned before there are two main characters in the story. The first being Ashley who is the rape victim. I had a love hate relationship with Ashley. While I’ve never been through a situation like hers I can def empathize with all the pain she is dealing with. But there were times when Ashley was just unreasonable and it wasn’t because she triggered but because she was stubborn and wanted to punish people. I realize she’s a high school student but I still wanted her to at least realize her mistake and redeem herself. No such luck. She felt static and like her whole point in being was to make point. If that makes sense.
Her brother Derek was obviously the champion of the story because he had the redemption arc. He stood by during the rape trial and even endorsed her rapist’s behaviors and now blames himself for the way his family is falling apart. But he learns from his mistakes and makes a huge change. He grew up. He was much less annoying that his sister.
As for the side characters, none of them really stand out. Ashley’s boyfriend was super generic. It was interesting to see how Ashley’s family members channeled their grief. Tragedy doesn’t only touch the victim but the victim’s loved ones. I gave characters 3.5/5 Stars
Next let’s talk about world building. I thought the author did a really good job of putting you in each moment. She really built up the atmosphere, so the tension was palpable. The novel is set in modern times so the world building really revolves around setting up the story of Ashley being raped and where her and derek are emotionally right now. Which is utter chaos understandably. I really feel like the author got us into their heads so we could feel what what these characters felt. I gave world building a 5/5
Now let’s chat about writing style. The story is told in both past and present. The story would flop between present day and anywhere from two years ago to 10 years ago. Some people hate stories told like this but I rather enjoy them. I think the past flashbacks were very helpful in giving us a picture of Ashley and Derek’s childhood together how they grew so far apart. I also liked that the chapters were clearly labeled with whose POV we were in so I never confused the two. I thought the story flowed well together and ended up giving writing style 4/5 stars.
Finally let’s discuss Personal enjoyment. This book was very intense and hard to read at times. But I understand the necessity of Someone That I Used to Know. I enjoyed the discussions it sparked and how it made me think. I didn’t like the parts that felt forced but they weren’t frequent. I gave personal enjoyment 4/5 Stars
This makes my overall rating 4/5 stars for Someone that I Used to Know. I hope that this story gets into as many teens hands as possible. Whether its to teach them a lesson is rape culture or just letting them know that they are not alone as victims. This story is very powerful and one that we definitely needed. ...more

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Jan 11, 2019 Cristina Marie rated it it was ok

This story is mostly about the conflict between two siblings, Ashley and Derek. Though it takes place two years after Ashley was raped by Derek's football teammate Victor Patton, the effects of the trauma have affected their family. Now why is there conflict between Ashley and Derek? Well, Derek had tried to get Ashley to hate him, and succeeded because of his disgusting reactions to what happened to her. His horrible mistakes completely seperated them.

Okay, I don't want to spoil too much about ...more

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Jul 21, 2018 hajer☽ rated it it was amazing

Shelves: 2018, arcs

[Arc provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review!]

To be honest, I don’t know how to feel about this book. Even now after I finished it. It’s a good book, but there are some small personal issues I had with it that don’t affect the overall message of the novel, and they didn’t affect my overall opinion/rating either. And honestly, if I was talking about my favorite things about this book, then this is going to be a LONG review. (And I don’t really know how to talk about the things I l [Arc provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review!]

To be honest, I don’t know how to feel about this book. Even now after I finished it. It’s a good book, but there are some small personal issues I had with it that don’t affect the overall message of the novel, and they didn’t affect my overall opinion/rating either. And honestly, if I was talking about my favorite things about this book, then this is going to be a LONG review. (And I don’t really know how to talk about the things I like…) So I totally, absolutely, 100% recommend this novel!

But let’s talk about the personal issues I had with it (which shouldn’t sway your opinion on whether you should read it or not!):

- the story is really emotional and informative at the same time. Sometimes, the information about consent and sexual assault and victim blaming is written in blocks, like the author was trying to include everything she had researched in a particular scene, and not just space them out so the character/s can learn something knew about these issues and help them grow as their own individual people. So it feels a bit preachy at times, but that’s okay. Personally, I’ve learned some things through this book!

- There were too many characters, and most of them weren’t developed or rememberable enough, even Brittany, who was in both of the characters’ POVs. I couldn’t really pinpoint their personalities or relate to them at all, or even picture them. They didn’t feel like real people. They’re just there to fill a role.

- Where is their schooling?? Both main characters go to school, which technically affected their everyday lives and the plot, but they didn’t have homework or class work. They didn’t even attend class. (Sorry, that just bothered me a little bit. Please ignore me!)

- I would really, really love to learn more about Sebastian…

With that said, Ashely is a really strong role model, even if she can be frustrating at times. Derek, man, I literally FELT his guilt. The emotions in this book are STRONG, so be prepared to cry and get angry and maybe a little bit triggered too. And it helped me find ways to raise awareness in my own community! (Thank you, Patty Blount!!)

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About Patty Blount

Patty Blount

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Patty Blount grew up quiet and a bit invisible in Queens, NY, but found her voice in books. Today, she writes smart and strong characters willing to fight for what’s right. She’s the award-winning author of edgy, realistic, gut-wrenching contemporary and young adult romance. Still a bit introverted, she gets lost often, eats way too much chocolate, and tends to develop mad, passionate crushes on f ...more

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Quotes from Someone I Used to...

“These don't look so bad, right? Maybe you think women are overreacting when they talk about stuff like this. But there's the thing... women keep telling us this crap makes them uncomfortable. And what do we do?" Ted waits a beat. " We ignore them. We tell them to lighten up, accept a compliment, stop making everything about them, and that's wrong. It is about them. We should be strong enough to be able to back off when women tell us the things we do scare them.” — 1 likes

“This is rape culture - this tendency for good men, the kind of men who say they're outraged by rape, to repeatedly ignore and maybe even support the behaviors that excuse rape.” — 0 likes

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