Men, Love & Sex: The Complete User's Guide for Women

by David Zinczenko, Ted Spiker

THIS IS THE BOOK THAT WILL COMPLETELY CHANGE THE WAY YOU THINK ABOUT MEN! In this funny and fascinating guide for women, thousands of men confess what turns them on, what turns them off, and what turns "for now" into "forever." What makes a man fall in love? Why do men really cheat? What does he want in the bedroom? What's the one thing that men crave in a relationship more than anything else (besides that)? The surprising and insightful answers to life's biggest relationship questions can be found here in the pages of MEN, LOVE & The Complete User's Guide for Women. Using an exclusive Harris Interactive poll that surveyed more than 5,000 men and women, Men's Health(r) editor-in-chief David Zinczenko and coauthor Ted Spiker have written the book that explains and decodes the male creature how they act, what they think, and what they want in their relationships. With shocking and never-before-seen statistics and powerful confessions, the New York Times bestselling authors present a modern survival guide for women into the inner-workings of the male mind, explaining everything from why he clams up during a fight to the moment he knows he's found the one. This indispensable guide will help women understand the men in their lives through every step of courtship first dates, fights, break-ups, make-ups, marriage, and everything else along the way"so that women can break through and see what's happening inside the often bewildering male mind. How? With such features Say This, Not Perfect communication strategies for women to get what they want and to get men to open up! Masculinity The surprising truths about men's feelings and how you can figure out exactly where he stands! The Ultimate Male What it means when a man doesn't sleep over, when he gets insanely jealous, when he grunts during conversation, when he buys an appliance for a birthday gift--along with insights into dozens of other male mysteries! Wondering Answers to women's most pressing questions about men. Why can't he say he's sorry? Why can't he fight like an adult? Why can't he aim inside the toilet? Men's brains, feelings and actions can be harder to interpret than abstract art. So let MEN, LOVE & The Complete User's Guide for Women become your guide to navigating a relationship through all of its stages. Once you know the secrets to the male mind, you'll be able to bridge the communication gaps that divide men and women. You'll be able to strengthen the relationship you have now"or use your new insights to find the perfect man for you. In the end, you'll get better talks, better sex, better fighting, better understanding, better love, better relationships, and a better life. For the both of you.

Genres: Nonfiction, Relationships, Psychology, Self Help, Sexuality, Love, Reference

208 pages, Hardcover

First published September 5, 2006

About the author

David Zinczenko is an American publisher, author, and businessman. Previously, he was the executive vice president and general manager of Men's Health, Women's Health, Prevention and Rodale Books, the editorial director of Men's Fitness and the nutrition and wellness editor at ABC News.

Reviews

[Lauriek · Rating 3 out of 5]

There are some good points in this ("no matter how often you find us at the door stamping our feet....we appreciate all you do to look good") but, if you read it take it with a grain of salt. True you don't want to jump to the negative, but don't sugar coat and believe everything he does is innocent as this book implies you should.
There is quite a bit of stereotyping and double standards. For example, saying women play games and then saying that he flirts with another woman in front of you to "hint that he has other options, He doesn't want them, but he wants you to know that he has them..." Really? if that isn't playing games, what is? There maybe many reasons he does that, he might want them and is letting you know you have to accept it.
Or "...He looks at other women. He's got a good strong pulse." Face it if he's looking at women when out with you he's not paying attention to you. For whatever reason, its uncomfortable subject or he's bored, it doesn't matter he's being disrespectful and you don't have to accept it. How would he feel if you checked every guy out, turned in your seat to watch someone walk by while hes baring his soul?
In the same chapter, saying he can't listen to you vent because he needs to fix things and saying (when talking about relationship issues) he needs you to tell him what to fix. What happened to he needs to find solutions and fix things?? Isn't that throwing relationship responsibility on women and an excuse for not trying?
Or men cheat because they're biologically designed to plant their seed and populate the earth. If they are, then women must be designed to find seed and populate the earth. So that's no excuse for his wandering eye or cheating, without saying the same is ok for women.
There are definitely good things about this book. The side notes and quotes from both men and women. And the chapter on male vanity sums up the differences between men and women very well. Men and women are far more alike and we have much more in common than most people think. They just express it differently. There are also some very good ideas in the "say this not that" sections. Rewording what you want to say to get a better response. Those are good for all relationships.

[Shaikerrah Mena]

dis book iz krazy!itz tell about mens secrets!it tells it all!datz y i like dis book!these r da kind of books dat i read cuz itz interesting!

[Trea · Rating 5 out of 5]

Whether you’re single or married I definitely recommend this book.

[Elizabeth · Rating 2 out of 5]

Started out with great potential, but got hung up on the sex angle of men and relationships. This was especially funny because early on in the book he goes on a bit of a tirade about the fact that men are not obsessed with sex. I finally quite reading it the tone shifted from, "ladies, here is a way to understand and work with your man" to "This is just the way he is so get used to it and don't expect any better". The other frustrating chapter was the discussion on what constitutes cheating, that included the suggestion that early in the relationship you should have a discussion about what each of you considers cheating so no one gets their feelings hurt later on. I personally think, here is a good rule of thumb, if you are going to get hurt if your partner behaves in a certain way, then guess what you shouldn't do those things either. "It was a stupid drunk kiss, just a silly mistake" is not a viable defense.

[Suzanne Manners · Rating 2 out of 5]

I don't know if I'd really get much use out of this "complete user's guide for women." I don't recall any of the case studies in this guide having men over 35. There were a lot of very corny pick-up lines in the examples of "say this not that" ... For instance, "How would you like to play Simon Says blindfolded?" Really??

I guess one thing important to remember is that men don't always think like women. While sometimes they seem to take things lightly, deep down they are just feeling secure in their relationship and being comfortable doesn't mean they lack feelings.

[Bowties&Paperairplanes · Rating 2 out of 5]

Silly and juicy; read it more for curiosity on the questions people were asking (and responses). After a book like this, I’m often left wondering about the ways we socialize men and women (sorry for the binary!) to respond to each other’s needs and our own. For instance, much information in this book states things like, “if you ask about feelings, we don’t know how to answer”, “if you as ask a question along the likes of ‘how do you feel about that’, you need to be specific otherwise you get answers like ‘that sucks’ or ‘I dunno’”, “asking about how the relationship is going is a mistake, gals need to keep it to specific questions because guys won’t talk about the relationship unless there is a problem”.

Seems pretty restricting for men and i have to believe we can deepen that emotional well...

[Lauren · Rating 2 out of 5]

What makes a man fall in love? Why do men really cheat? What does he want in the bedroom? What's the one thing that men crave in a relationship more than anything else (besides that)? The surprising and insightful answers to life's biggest relationship questions can be found here in the pages of MEN, LOVE & SEX: The Complete User's Guide for Women. Using an exclusive Harris Interactive poll that surveyed more than 5,000 men and women, Men's Health(r) editor-in-chief David Zinczenko and coauthor Ted Spiker have written the book that explains and decodes the male creature how they act, what they think, and what they want in their relationships.

This was more of a scroll through kind of book. I did not get much incite out of it with as many surveys they took.

[Srinivas Srinivad]

Like sex im hot man 9640833717 cal me aunites onl

[Shiva Shakthi · Rating 3 out of 5]

Take it with a pinch of salt. The advice some were good but others were like do i have to act accordingly and accomidatingly to.

[Deanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Men's Health(r) editor-in-chief David Zinczenko, uses his insightful research methods to solving one of the great challenges of the day-helping women understand men. From the first moment they meet, through every stage of courtship to the inevitable conclusion-success or breakup-Zinczenko outlines with vivid, compassionate, and irreverent detail exactly what goes on in the minds of men and how women can use that knowledge to their advantage.

Can't say that I understand men any better, but it was interesting and thought provoking.

[Indah Threez Lestari · Rating 3 out of 5]

Biasanya aku jarang beli buku nonfiksi model begini, tapi karena obral murah meriah di Palmerah Barat, aku embat juga deh.

Buku ini memberi pencerahan bagi kaum wanita untuk mengetahui bagaimana pria bertindak, apa yang ada dalam pikirannya, dan apa yang diinginkannya dari sebuah hubungan cinta. Tapi buatku pribadi, memberi pencerahan dan kesadaran bahwa caraku bertindak, jalan pikiranku, dan apa yang kuinginkan dari hubungan cinta sama dengan pria...

What do you think? Am I a woman from Mars?

[Elusive.Mystery · Rating 1 out of 5]

One hesitates to call this a “book,” since it reads like one of those “Ten Secrets to Make Your Man Crazy” magazine articles. Quick summary of the contents: yes, we men are slobs, but we’re lovable slobs, and you, women, hold the key to our hearts (Yawn, yawn, boring!) Incidentally, I will add that there was no secret formula to fix any problems one may have in one’s intimate relationship with a man, married, single, or other.

[Pía López Copetti · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quite interesting book. The author does have a talent for getting us women to put into the "men's mindset". Perhaps it would be far more useful if it didn't focus so much on sex, cheating, etc. but rather than on what truly men want from life to really feel happy. It's not like all men are sex-obsessed or cheaters on the making... just my opinion.

[Kathy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Even if you've been married a long time, it doesn't hurt to be reminded of some basic truths of the human experience.
This lighthearted book is informative and engaging. Stephen Hoye is the perfect narrator for the subject - brotherly, best friend-ish and entertaining.

[Christine · Rating 2 out of 5]

Entertaining, but not a book I would consult for advice. It seemed to try and excuse poor behavior by men. I get that men and women think and act differently, but most of this book just made me roll my eyes.

[Lesley Albers · Rating 2 out of 5]

Picked up this book because I thought it would be interesting to hear a guy's opinion on how guys think...guess I learned a few things and on other topics what I assumed I knew was actually correct...! Interesting read to say the least ...so I am glad I read this.

[Hippy Girl · Rating 5 out of 5]

Very good reading - especially with couples. Good road trip book. You are trapped in a car together! It is enlighting for both men and women - we actually think differently than we thought!

[Karelin]

thought it was extremely informative!

[Thuy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quite amusing.

[Jaime Marmolejo · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a very fun read. I love to find out the insides of boys minds. haha And for the most part every guy I have read sections to says its completely accurate for the most part. haha VERY FUN!!!

[Sher❤ The Fabulous BookLover · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book. It was fun and David is a good writer. I loved hearing what's going on in the minds of men. Lots of good, truthful info that you don't hear everyday.

[Cathie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Laid out in an easy-to-read format, lots of interesting info. Not just for singles, many of quotes and questions are from married men and women.

[Traci · Rating 4 out of 5]

Does give some helpful insights as to why men are the way they are.

[Ghalia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked the book since it gave me an advice from different men about how they think and behave.

[Michele · Rating 2 out of 5]

Totally meh

[Joan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good stuff!