A Child's First Book about Marriage: God's Way Is Always Best

by Jani Ortlund

The world's view of marriage can often be very different to what the Bible says. But who is right, and who should we listen to? From very young, children are confronted with and can be confused by these conflicts. This hardback, illustrated title helps to explain the beauties of God's plan for marriage to children of any age, introducing them to a different, counter-cultural way of viewing these aspects of life and faith.

Genres: Childrens, Picture Books, Parenting, Faith

44 pages, Hardcover

First published February 1, 2018

About the author

Jani Ortlund is a well-known writer and conference speaker who loves spending her energies connecting women and their families with the Word of God. She is the wife of Dr. Raymond Ortlund Jr., pastor, author, and former seminary professor. Jani, a former schoolteacher, holds a master’s degree in education. The Ortlunds have four grown children and two grandchildren.

Reviews

[Lauren Compton]

This books has such important truths that need to be instilled in young children. The pictures are lovely, the content age appropriate, and the story flows nicely. I will say that a couple of pictures aren't what I call modest, but overall the wedding dresses are fine.
The quote, "what God says about marriage matters most" is so, so true!

In the times we live in, this book is sadly in great need.

[Amber Carroll]

Things I liked:
-Ortlund describes the permanency of marriage in this way: “Marriage is a vow, a sacred promise. … A bride and groom make these promises because sometimes it is hard to love each other. Marriage vows help keep a couple together even when they don’t feel like loving each other.” And later, “It will be wonderful! Marriage will also be hard.” Yes! Christian marriage is good and beautiful, and it’s also challenging and requires self sacrifice. We need to talk about both realities with our kids when we talk about marriage.
-”Not all countries or leaders agree on what marriage should be, but…don’t get confused! There are laws of the land and there are God’s laws, and they are not always the same” and later, “Marriage isn’t what we think it should be. Marriage is what God says it should be.” This is true! It’s why I always use the phrase “Christian marriage” when talking specifically about God’s design for marriage. What our culture (here in the US) calls marriage isn’t the same as what God calls marriage. And our kids will grow up hearing the word “marriage” used to describe a variety of relationships that aren’t what God would bless as a marriage. So help your kids out by calling Christian marriage “Christian marriage.”
-“Someday you may get married.” I appreciate the “may.” Not all of our kids will marry, and Scripture doesn’t promise anyone a spouse.
-The prayer at the very end of the book is nice.

Things I thought could have been different:
-The book begins, “You probably know a lot of people who are married–your mom and dad…” That first sentence immediately precludes me, a divorced mom, from reading this book to my kids. Ortlund does discuss divorce in a couple sentences later in the book, near the end, but that doesn’t help much here in the first sentence.
-The book seems to have a pretty complementarian view of marriage, particularly when describing Adam and Eve’s marriage and God bringing Eve to Adam like a father walks a bride down the aisle to give her to the groom. If you hold a more egalitarian view of marriage, this book may not be for you.
-Ortlund defines marriage as, “the most special of all relationships here on earth” and goes on to say, “A husband and wife become more special to each other than to anyone else in the whole world.” These phrases are too close to romance idolatry for my comfort.
-Ortlund describes marriage as having “someone who cares. When one needs advice, there is someone to ask. When one gets hurt, there is someone to help. When one loses, they stick together, and when one wins, they both cheer!” This list should describe all friendships, particularly those found in the Church, not just marriage relationships. Caring, giving advice, helping, sticking together, and cheering aren’t exclusive to marriage, and marriage isn’t the only place our kids can find someone who will do these things for/with them.
-I know this is a book meant to teach kids about marriage only, but I am convinced that every time we talk about marriage with our kids we should also talk about vocational singleness. Parents need to give both relational vocations equal honor and importance, highlight the need for both in our churches and communities, and remind their kids that they will one day discern which vocation God is calling them to because each Christian has the same capacity for each vocation.

[Rachel Cummings]

“Marriage brings joy to grown-ups. Marriage is good for children. Marriage helps keep communities safe and countries strong.” Learn all about God’s beautiful design for marriage in: A Child’s First Book About Marriage: God’s Way is Always Best by Jani Ortlund with illustrations by Angelo Ruta.

My daughter is five and recently started talking about marriage. “Are you and daddy married?” “Will you marry me?” “Can I marry daddy?” She knows marriage is for a boy and a girl and gets confused when she sees or hears otherwise. This book answers all the questions your child may have and explains in wonderful detail, while being concise and understandable, why God created marriage.

The book begins in the Garden of Eden with the very first marriage, where two “me’s” became one “us.” Ever since then, people have been getting married. Marriage is one man and one woman, and no one should ever separate them. “Just like everything that comes from the heart of God, marriage is beautiful and good.” A husband and wife have a special bond and they share things with each other that they don’t share with anyone else. And while marriage may be about love, it is also about something much deeper, a vow, a sacred promise. However, we live in a fallen world, so sometimes people break their promises, or think they can decide for themselves what marriage should be. But we must always remember that “marriage is what God says it should be.” “God made us and God made marriage… and God’s way is always loving and best.”

I highly recommend adding this truth-filled, gospel centered, book to your home library! It is great for all ages. There is also a prayer and parent note included. The illustrations are impactful, and the text is thorough. Just all-around, a fantastic book! “Marriage is an up-close display of the forever love of Jesus for His people.” Let’s show the world who Christ is by being truthful about marriage.

[Kalie Blevins]

We gave this to the littles who were in the wedding ceremony so they could understand a little more about what was happening. Our nephew, a 2nd grader, could read it to us easily and it's short enough for younger attention spans. It's a great introduction to God's design for marriage.

[Courtney]

This gave just enough detail for me to read to my six-year-old. Definitely appreciated the emphasis on God being the author of marriage.