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You're Not That Great: (but neither is anyone else)
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You're Not That Great: (but neither is anyone else)

3.31  ·  Rating details ·  705 ratings  ·  109 reviews
I am addicted to positivity. I am addicted to positivity. I am addicted to positivity.

I care more about feeling great than being great.


The self-help industry tells you that if you're positive, if you put your best foot forward and if you just believe in yourself that you will find happiness. Let's be real, you can read all the inspirational quotes y
Hardcover, 192 pages
Published December 5th 2017 by Grand Central Publishing
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3.31  · 
Rating details
 ·  705 ratings  ·  109 reviews

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I'm of two minds about this book.

On one hand, I agree with a lot of what the author says: The positivity movement is weirdly condescending, fluffs peoples' egos beyond belief, and does make some people incredibly hyper-sensitive to criticism. I agree that there are some people who are so desperate for positivity and compliments and ego-fluffing that they overshare on social media or constantly seek validation from others.

I also greatly agreed with the idea that criticism and some degree of negat
Nenia ✨ Queen of Literary Trash, Protector of Out-of-Print Gems, Khaleesi of Bodice Rippers, Mother of Smut, the Unrepentant, Breaker of Convention ✨ Campbell

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I snagged a copy of this ARC because the title made me laugh and I loved the paradox of the snappy, sarcastic title against the baby pink cover. "Mean" can sometimes be funny, as evidenced by the movie Mean Girls, and sometimes we all need a reality check. I was expecting something tongue-in-cheek, sarcastic, witty. Your best-frenemy-for-ever as she channels her inner-Dorothy Parker while sipping on mimosas at your favorite cafe.

Instead I g
Jake Harris
Dec 05, 2017 rated it it was ok
A not-very-well-written book about a great way of living that gets repetitive around page 50. At 179 pages, it could’ve been way shorter and just as effective.
May 05, 2018 rated it did not like it
I’m not entirely sure what I was expecting out of a motivational book authored by a producer on The Bachelor. In the hands of someone struggling with a mental health issue, this could be a very dangerous book. The concepts in it aren’t altogether wrong, but the way they are packaged and presented might be quite triggering. The basic concept is that we need to be motivated to greatness through negativity; positivity only motivates us to mediocrity. Hm. What exactly is the author’s background on t ...more
Mar 16, 2018 rated it it was ok
You’re not that great was maybe... not so great 🤷🏼♀ ...more
Savannah Wooten
Feb 07, 2018 rated it liked it
There were some great points in here! In some ways it was a valid and needed personal (and societal!) call out. That being said, the author verges on unkind to people who do not meet his standards of success and strikes me as still growing in his own ability to be both self-reflective, self-improving, and content/fulfilled - he hints at this at the end.

Some components were incredible - laugh out loud funny (the part about the hand on the hot stove had me in stitches and really illustrated his p
Muhtelif Okumalar
Bu kitap, olumlama ve pozitif düşünme dürtüsünün kişisel gelişimimiz için olumsuz yanlarına değiniyor. Biraz sert ama mizahi bir dille.
Kitabın pozitivizm bağımlılığı olarak bahsettiği şey ve zararı ne peki?
Olumlu düşünme, sizi ‘mevcut gerçekliğinizden’ uzaklaştıracak boyutlara geldiğinde zararlı olabilir. Yazar, ‘o kadar da harika değilsiniz’ derken varlığınızı olduğu gibi kabullenmek, mükemmel olmayan duygularınızı ve kusurlarınızı da sahiplenmek hayatınız için daha faydalı sonuçlar doğurur dem
Kevin Schwantje
Dec 11, 2018 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
This is probably the worst self-help book I've ever read, and I've been through a number of them. The author isn't original, funny, wise, or redeemable - he's just an asshole. Avoid this rage-ridden garbage like the plague.
Jan 09, 2018 rated it did not like it
So flipped through this book in chapters. read a bit. had to stop. it very much seems like this book is trying very hard to directly emulate the success of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck except Elan didnt have anything interesting to add, didnt actually read the Subtle Art and also hes an asshole.

theres a lot of pretentious attitude in here, and a lot of blatant... mistruths? like he says that telling five year old children their art is good is coddling and makes them narcissists (im paraph
Jan 24, 2018 rated it it was amazing
I really enjoyed this book because it's no nonsense good advice. And I relate to it because all of my life I have felt the need to convince everyone that I am worthy of being here! The premise that the things that make us not so great are indeed the things that make us strive to be great is not new to me but Elan in his matter of fact tone brings a level of authenticity to the topic that just blew me away. Working in HR, I am asked often for a book on personal development. Going forward, this wi ...more
Mar 01, 2018 rated it really liked it
Fucking brutal. This book was nothing like the fluffy self-help books I've been reading. It was uncomfortable and real. Maybe not for everyone, but I really appreciated the honestly and truth as well as a different viewpoint on life and how to succeed and get past anxiety and self-doubt.
Gwen - Chew & Digest Books -
This has one of the most hilarious and completely true opening sections that I have ever read. It was so dead on that I was in tears and ready to apologize to both of my parents. Giving you more detail would only ruin the moment for you, so I won't. It really brought things into perspective with parental relations though and for that, every reader should be at least a bit grateful, especially to their mother.

The laughter and honesty keep coming in the following chapters and freakishly, it's ofte
Taylor Wilson
Jan 05, 2018 rated it liked it
Shelves: netgalley
“We live in a world of contentment, mediocrity, and average people who think they’re excellent.”
-- Elan Gale, You’re Not That Great
Elan Gale is straightforward and refuses to coddle anyone in his new book, You’re Not That Great (but neither is anyone else). This book teaches you how to use all the negativity around you to better improve your life. It teaches you how to take everyday feelings such as hate, regret, and shame and make them work for you. Gale provides plenty of examples of everyth
Mar 03, 2018 rated it liked it
Shelves: nonfiction
As a book about self-improvement, this should really be reviewed on two axes: the writing/entertainment value and the advice.

The writing was a good time, at least as much as a book telling you you suck can be. Very readable, and in contrast to other reviewers, it's not especially long, weighing in at 192 pages. It did take me 3 weeks or so to finish, but that's really more about my reading habits getting worse as I get older and have less time.

The advice I have mixed feelings about. Others have
Kelly 💜☕️
I listened to half of this audio and decided to not to finish.

This book came on my radar through one of the podcasts I listen to with former contestants on The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. The author is a Bachelor producer, so this book gets my “bachelor nation” tag.

This is a non-traditional self help book... it’s very odd with crass language and harsh delivery. I tried to give it a chance since the concept appealed to me, but I just couldn’t waste time on something with this negative energy.
Apr 25, 2018 rated it it was ok
"You're Not That Great" was just that...not great. I felt belittled by someone who really has no place to belittle but I guess that's the point of the book. I'm not a person who relishes in positivity and I certainly understand the power of motivation through negative emotions but Gale doesn't present any evidence that this is more powerful than positivity. He just throws obscenities at you and tells you you suck in the hope that you'll find some inspiration in that...not that he cares, as he ma ...more
Mrs Mommy Booknerd
This book is fantastic. I laughed and loved the raw truth in this book. I was left feeling like I needed to look within myself and really see how I can make some changes. Life is going to happen, you control how you react to it. I just adored this approach to looking at life and this is a book that would make a great gift. I loved that is wasn't a typical self help book, it was way better than that! A must read for all (as long as you have a good sense of humor).
Shira Selkovits
Jan 22, 2018 rated it really liked it
The only self-help book worth reading, in my opinion. Aside from being hysterical and honest, it’s also incredibly relevant and insightful. It’s tough love in the best way and the most inspiring book that ever insulted me.
Feb 16, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Easy to read and some great points to encourage to not be so damn precious. A bit repetitive, but no need to take it all too seriously. Lots of it was very refreshing to read.
Dec 10, 2018 rated it did not like it
So much negativity. I didn't like it.
Jan 20, 2018 rated it liked it
I’m not really a big fan of self-help books, even ironic ones, but this one is witty and well presented. Still, while I generally support anything that opposes the positive thinking movement, I can’t deal with the bitterness and rapacity of Gale’s worldview. Followed literally, this book would be a recipe for libertarianism and sociopathy.
Alex Baca
Feb 14, 2018 added it
Shelves: 2018
I liked Elan Gale's appearance on Sam Sanders' podcast. This was LOL to read while unemployed.
Andrea Seeley
Feb 13, 2018 rated it liked it
I love Elan Gale so I had to give this a shot. It really did open my eyes to a different way of thinking- a lot of his stories really resonated with me. It was a bit repetitive at times.
Aug 24, 2018 rated it it was amazing
sometimes you just need a book to kick you in the ass but make you laugh all at the same time
Aug 23, 2018 rated it liked it
Shelves: own
I never thought I was all that great to begin with so this maybe missed the mark on me. But still some insightful information.
Aug 23, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Ah-mazing!!! Game changer. Definitely the type of info I need in my life!!
Sarah Maier
Jan 03, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This book was funny, helpful and motivating. I'd listen to it again just for the laughs.
Jane Potter
I think this is better suited for American audiences. Australian and the British already know they sux. I think the first bit was a bit heavy and if you have depression maybe stay clear. Having said all that I get where he's coming from and I agree. There have been times where a "you can do it" has been so much more motivational than "you can do it". If I everyone already thinks I can do something than why do it? There is a place in life for negative emotion and happiness is just one note on a t ...more
Noor alabras
Nov 12, 2018 rated it really liked it
كتاب محفز بطريقة تكسير المقاديف
اول مرة بقرآ هيك نوع من التحفيز وتخيلت اني رح وقف بعد اول صفحة ، لكن اسلوب الكاتب بشد وكان بوقته الصحيح جدا لالي
بنصح فيه
Courtney Judy
I wish I had liked it more than I did, I was really going in hopeful that I was going to find this book to be amazing. It had everything I liked, cursing...honesty...bluntness...but towards the end I was honestly getting sick of it. I was struggling with some of the concepts (and I myself deal with levels of anxiety and some of the other normal emotions discussed in the books but not usually openly discussed in public) that the author was putting out there.

And in the spirit of the honesty the a
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“Everything happens for a reason is a warm cushion. To actually admit responsibility for your actions and to admit that you’re an idiot and you actually fucked up, that’s really scary. To take in that damage is a lot harder than just saying everything happens for a reason.” 4 likes
“Smart People Know They’re Dumb Dumb People Think They’re Smart” 2 likes
More quotes…