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The 2000 Year Old Man
Reveals the authors' amazing secrets for long life and the entertaining, fascinating, and timeless wisdom based on the experiences of two millennia
96 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 1981
About the author
Mel Brooks
74 books207 followersMel Brooks (born "Melvin Kaminsky") is an American multi-award winning director, writer, composer, lyricist, comedian, actor and producer best known as a creator of broad film farces and comedy parodies.
Brooks is a member of the short list of entertainers with the distinction of having won an Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar and a Tony award.
Brooks is a member of the short list of entertainers with the distinction of having won an Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar and a Tony award.
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
August 28, 2017
Well . . . this was not as funny as I remembered.
Originally a comedy skit, created by Brooks and Reiner in 1961 after Brooks claimed that a bout of gout made him feel like a 2000-year-old man, the routine was later adapted as an animated television special in 1975. This book, based on transcripts from four sound recordings made by the authors, was released in 1981.
Here's my favorite bit from when I was a kid:
REINER: . . . in the two thousand years you've lived, you've seen a lot of changes.
2000: Yes. I certainly have.
REINER: What is the biggest change you've seen?
2000: In two thousand years, the greatest thing mankind ever devised, I think, in my humble opinion, is Saran Wrap. You can put a sandwich in it, you can look through it, you can touch it. You can put it over your face and fool around and everything. It's so good and cute! I love it.
REINER: You equate this with man's discovery of space?
2000: That was good. That was good. That was a good thing, space, finding space.
There were a few racy parts that were either censored, or went over my head when I was younger:
REINER: Onan? What did Onan invent?
2000: Onan discovered himself. A very big invention.
REINER: Yes, I see.
2000: I think he was falling and he grabbed onto himself and that's how he fell in love.
REINER: And he stayed with himself.
2000: And he lived with himself and he was in love.
REINER: Was he ostracized for being that way?
2000: He was circumcised. I don't know ostracized.
REINER: No, no. I mean was he shunned?
2000: Oh, yes, he was shunned because the Bible, it says, "Thou shalt not spill the seed of thy fruit on the ground," you know.
REINER: That's right, and also that "thou shalt be fruitful and multiply."
2000: And he was fruitless and subtracting, if you want to look at it that way.
And I thought Lily Von Shtupp was the only Mel Brook's character to work blue.
Here's one more bit that I'd never heard, but did enjoy:
REINER: Did you know Paul Revere?
2000: An anti-Semite bastard.
REINER: You didn't like Paul Revere?
2000: He hated Jews.
REINER: He was a hero!
2000: No, he hated the Jews. I couldn't take him.
REINER: No, no, he was a hero. How could you call him an anti-Semite?
2000: He warned us, he was afraid they were moving in, he had fear that they were going in the neighborhood, to move in. "They're coming! They're coming! The Yiddish are coming!" All night he was yelling, "Beware of the Jews!"
REINER: Were you living in that neighborhood at the time?
2000: I was there, I heard him myself.
REINER: He was yelling, "The British are coming."
2000: Oy, my God! Oh! "The British are coming???" I'm gonna have to send his wife a note. Oh! Oh, oh. That is bad. I didn't know it. And I didn't go to his funeral! Oh, my God! What an error!
Though this was a nice trip down memory lane, I didn't laugh much
You can catch a bit of the act here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOTKD...

Originally a comedy skit, created by Brooks and Reiner in 1961 after Brooks claimed that a bout of gout made him feel like a 2000-year-old man, the routine was later adapted as an animated television special in 1975. This book, based on transcripts from four sound recordings made by the authors, was released in 1981.
Here's my favorite bit from when I was a kid:
REINER: . . . in the two thousand years you've lived, you've seen a lot of changes.
2000: Yes. I certainly have.
REINER: What is the biggest change you've seen?
2000: In two thousand years, the greatest thing mankind ever devised, I think, in my humble opinion, is Saran Wrap. You can put a sandwich in it, you can look through it, you can touch it. You can put it over your face and fool around and everything. It's so good and cute! I love it.
REINER: You equate this with man's discovery of space?
2000: That was good. That was good. That was a good thing, space, finding space.
There were a few racy parts that were either censored, or went over my head when I was younger:
REINER: Onan? What did Onan invent?
2000: Onan discovered himself. A very big invention.
REINER: Yes, I see.
2000: I think he was falling and he grabbed onto himself and that's how he fell in love.
REINER: And he stayed with himself.
2000: And he lived with himself and he was in love.
REINER: Was he ostracized for being that way?
2000: He was circumcised. I don't know ostracized.
REINER: No, no. I mean was he shunned?
2000: Oh, yes, he was shunned because the Bible, it says, "Thou shalt not spill the seed of thy fruit on the ground," you know.
REINER: That's right, and also that "thou shalt be fruitful and multiply."
2000: And he was fruitless and subtracting, if you want to look at it that way.
And I thought Lily Von Shtupp was the only Mel Brook's character to work blue.
Here's one more bit that I'd never heard, but did enjoy:
REINER: Did you know Paul Revere?
2000: An anti-Semite bastard.
REINER: You didn't like Paul Revere?
2000: He hated Jews.
REINER: He was a hero!
2000: No, he hated the Jews. I couldn't take him.
REINER: No, no, he was a hero. How could you call him an anti-Semite?
2000: He warned us, he was afraid they were moving in, he had fear that they were going in the neighborhood, to move in. "They're coming! They're coming! The Yiddish are coming!" All night he was yelling, "Beware of the Jews!"
REINER: Were you living in that neighborhood at the time?
2000: I was there, I heard him myself.
REINER: He was yelling, "The British are coming."
2000: Oy, my God! Oh! "The British are coming???" I'm gonna have to send his wife a note. Oh! Oh, oh. That is bad. I didn't know it. And I didn't go to his funeral! Oh, my God! What an error!
Though this was a nice trip down memory lane, I didn't laugh much
You can catch a bit of the act here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOTKD...

May 4, 2026
I listened to this as an audio book.
The jokes often felt old and repetitive. I found the laugh track excessive and it consumed too much of the time.
Brooks and Rheiner did have good chemistry together and their timing was quite good. At moments it shined, just not enough.
The jokes often felt old and repetitive. I found the laugh track excessive and it consumed too much of the time.
Brooks and Rheiner did have good chemistry together and their timing was quite good. At moments it shined, just not enough.
October 31, 2020
It grows on you.
March 27, 2022
I listened to this as an audiobook.
Or rather as a series of comedy sketches.
I laughed myself silly!!!
Or rather as a series of comedy sketches.
I laughed myself silly!!!
August 5, 2023
Delightful, but not nearly as fun as the spoken exchange between Reiner and Brooks. Its a good reminder of the joy sparked between these two.
March 16, 2012
I read this because I found it in a box of books I had not read after we had moved. If you like Mel Brooks's and Carl Reiner's sense of humor you will like this. Sort chapters make it quick to read.
November 3, 2010
"Humor is just another defense against the universe."
February 20, 2012
Dobra rzecz. Bardzo w stylu Mela Brooksa.
October 19, 2013
Written version of their record and it is still funny even when you know the punch lines
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews








