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Johnny Would You Love Me If My Dick Were Bigger
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Johnny Would You Love Me If My Dick Were Bigger

4.46  ·  Rating details ·  103 ratings  ·  17 reviews
“Brontez is a raw tongue of flame blazing through all the blatant fakery and insincere bullshit of today’s gay/music/human scene. This audacious non-memoir burnt the hair off the back of my neck and had me rolling with glee.” —S.F. Bay Guardian

A dirty cult-classic put out in a small batch by an underground publisher (Rudos and Rubes) in 2015, Johnny Would You Love Me If My
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Paperback, 166 pages
Published June 13th 2017 by The Feminist Press at CUNY (first published August 2015)
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4.46  · 
Rating details
 ·  103 ratings  ·  17 reviews


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Jason Gordon
Mar 26, 2018 rated it really liked it
After reading this, I think a lot of people missed the point reading it is a memoir. It’s partly that, but behind the bits of lurid sexual escapades are visceral criticisms of capitalism, patriarchy, racism, and bourgeoisie elements of gay culture.

It was also quite the surprise to find elements of art criticism (in reference to comedy and punk music) in this memoir.

S.
May 08, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: read-and-owned
This book was like a spiritual awakening. I'm addickted. I must find more.
Tom Buchanan
Aug 26, 2017 rated it it was amazing
This was no joke! Actually it kind of is a joke, but it's also, in Purnell's words, "dead serious"
This isn't a "comic" book to me, because when people call a book comic it makes me think of some long long John Barth nonsense definitely written by a guy over sixty with tenure. This books FUNNY. Crazy funny, crazy mean, absolutely lousy with charisma. Best thing I've read all year long.
Jeremy Hornik
May 06, 2018 rated it liked it
Raw, needy, funny. But it felt like a blog book. For me, the short pieces were hitting the same notes over and over.
Dan
Apr 07, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
A revelation. Filthy and hilarious. Often poignant. Purnell can write about sex and drugs and poor life decisions with disarming ease.

If you liked this, make sure to follow me on Goodreads for more reviews!
Seth
Jun 22, 2019 rated it liked it
I have a complicated relationship to this book and I'm not sure if I love it or hate it. It's difficult to put into words but...
I love it because:
- of the experimental writing format. This is truly stream of consciousness writing. There is no true 'plot' as the narrative just follows Purnell's fictionalized memoir across his early adult life. It's insinuated that these are all just writing exercises strung together, but either way I loved the way it created the narrative. It's as if you're readi
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Timothy
Nov 07, 2017 rated it really liked it
I wasn't into this book as much as I was the other book I recently read by him, "Since I laid my burden down." However, I would not hesitate to recommend this one for some readers. For certain readers who have been reading white authors of the Deep South all their lives, this is a good break from that, especially the bit about Southern Gothic.

Somewhere in this book--I'm 72% sure it was this book--there was a fantastic quote I meant to copy down, and after finishing the book I've skimmed the book
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Vampire Who Baked
Jul 27, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: favourites, rare
Probably the single funniest book I have ever read, but underneath much of the otherwise campy material there is a pretty strong undercurrent of seriousness-- especially the stories of growing up black and gay (and fabulously, flamboyantly black and gay) in rural Alabama, and everything that comes with it, the "ethics" and "rules" (all self-imposed) about who is "fuckable" and when and how and why, wholehearted acceptance of camp and the hypocrisy of hypermasculinity and whiteness within the LGB ...more
Terry
Jan 14, 2018 rated it it was amazing
What in the ever living fuck did I just read? This book has to be the craziest fucking thing I’ve ever laid eyes on. It is totally infectious and reminds me of “a transparent blue“, in terms of its visceral descriptions of gay sex, drug use, and terrible life decisions. This man is a hot ghetto mess, and I loved every single page of it.
Bulbul
Jul 23, 2018 rated it liked it
Meh. It was about sexual escapades of a black, gay man. That is all this book is about.
Jay Rose
Apr 12, 2018 rated it it was amazing
crude as hell and I loved every minute of it
Brandon Will
Nov 21, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Can be as hard to take as it is to look away (yes that's innuendo LOVE YOU BRONTEZ)
J.P.
Aug 29, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: lgbtq
I think I'm in love with this book. But it's a love that moves fast and tires me out too.
Byron
Dec 21, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Unfiltered, raw and I couldn't put it down.
Carrow Narby
Nov 23, 2018 rated it it was amazing
I don't even know what to say about this book except that I wish I could write like Brontez Purnell.
Constance Ann
Sep 28, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Highly recommended for anyone with a sense of humor about their darker times. This book had me cackling out loud in public and then feeling deep empathy for the narrator and their experiences. In ways, despite my own experiences being different, these stories resonate with the part of you that has ever sought love in all the wrong places.
Purnell's ability to look back on these times with honesty and humor is a thing of beauty.
Haley Jo
rated it really liked it
Jul 24, 2018
Sarah Stevens
rated it it was amazing
Nov 27, 2018
Macartney
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Oct 02, 2015
Afton Montgomery
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Dec 28, 2017
Jeremy
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Mar 25, 2018
evan
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Sep 05, 2018
Jessica Leonard
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Sep 25, 2017
Meghan
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Nov 18, 2016
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May 28, 2018
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Apr 05, 2019
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Megan
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Jan 03, 2019
Mary Margaret
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Mar 14, 2019
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