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亲爱的安德烈

4.33  ·  Rating details ·  381 ratings  ·  37 reviews
龙应台离开欧洲的时候,安德烈14岁。当她卸任台北市政府的工作(马英九市长亲自前往德国邀任的首任文化局长,任期内推动本土文化、树木保护等措施),重新有时间陪家人过日子的时候,安德烈已是1米84高的18岁青年大学生,有了驾照,可以进出酒吧,脸上线条棱角分明,眼神宁静深沉,透着一种独立的距离,手里拿着红酒杯,坐在桌子的那一端,有一点“冷”地看着自己的妈妈。
他们是两代人,年龄相差30多岁;他们也是两国人,中间横着东西文化。失去了小男孩安安没有关系,但龙应台无论如何要认识成熟的高校青年安德烈!
从此,他在德国,她在香港,他到香港,她到台湾,母子俩用了长长的3年时间相互通信——“18岁那一年”,“年轻却不清狂”,“我是个百分之百的混蛋”,“大学生哪里去了”,“为谁加油”,“你知道什么叫21岁”,“独立宣言”,“向左走,向右走”……平等得令人惊讶,坦率得近
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Published April 2015 by 广西师范大学出版社 (first published 2007)
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Average rating 4.33  · 
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Wsclai
Jun 03, 2013 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
關於談香港的部份感受尤其深。值得一讀再讀的書。
Jasmine
It's a book about the close relationship between a mother and her son. There were 36 letters sent and received by a mom lived in her hometown and her son, who studied abroad. I learned that there are certain differences of the two generations and also the current generation gap between them. Really a great book for family reading, making the parents know more about their kids and vise versa.
Oh Ruby
Apr 02, 2013 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I just want her son to shut up
Heidi
Feb 07, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
A book compiled with personal correspondence between a mother and a son. I can see the contrasting views from a Chinese parent and a western young adult on their understandings in life, cultural and independence.
Many Chinese parents have tried to display their care and affection through repetitive inquiries on personal issues like, " do you need to pee?"(as if, it's a collective event?), " who did you hangout with tonight?' (screening and sorting your choice of friends) or " Are your feeling co
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MIL
最近很紅的書
老媽強迫我一定要看完
雖然他不強迫我也會看完啦XD
我一天就把他看完了
真爽,好久沒那麼痛快的讀完一本書了
對我們年輕人來說
最有意思的是一老一小可以談那麼多東西
對長輩來說,令人羨慕的也是一把年紀還能跟小輩談那麼多東西
看完老媽問我,你覺得安德烈怎樣
唔....很難回答,一句話說不完吧
安德烈是幸運的孩子,有這樣一個俱觀察力批判力的母親
同時過著舒服的生活,讓他可以在有敏銳的觀察力的同時,有足夠的資源充實自己
他們母子倆的觀察確實非常犀利
對社會也有足夠的關懷
但有時會讓我覺得觀點太過高高在上
太用強勢的背景思考問題
大體而言,許多東西都是我讀過卻沒想過的,真慚愧
再說,東西兩方的教育和思潮縱使在全球化的世界裡
還是有巨大的差異
黃仁宇總愛說(其實也不用黃仁宇說
一堆人都這樣說,只是我中毒很深啦呵呵)
古代中國是以宗族為單位
深受儒家影響的東亞,縱使在現代
思考仍帶團體性,不注重個人
西方不然,西方重視個人已有深遠的傳統
對待晚輩的態度於是與東亞有莫大的不同
而我們夾在西力東漸之中
上有思想仍然傳統的長輩
下有西方強調個人的風潮
於是兩代之間便衝突不斷
我想這應該是現代東亞青年普遍的問題吧
所以這本書才會影起如此大的迴響
其實重點不
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Jeanne
Jan 27, 2009 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
my mother handed me the book when she visited me from taipei. i believe it is her way to reach out... that she understood that i am who i am--not quite fully asian and definitely not quite american and that i reside somewhere in between those two worlds.

this is a book about the conversations between a son and his mother... about their differences and similarities in music, booze, drugs, cigarettes, food, sex and the love that comes through from their impatience and exasperation with each other.
lcecel
Feb 28, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2019
〈独立宣言〉给我最大的震撼,可能也是因为大女儿从小一开始的反叛,我也是一个努力反思的妈妈,但最终还是觉得亚洲式的虎妈管教法比较有用,比较让我们心安。但是等她再大一点呢?我们已经无法用严厉去镇压她“听话”之后呢?是不是就得放手了?把孩子看成是完全独立的另外一个个体了,一个“别人”了?
这本书真的带给我很多深思,也让我看到我并不孤独,教育真的是一辈子要学习的。
希望我的女儿们长大了也仍愿意对我敞开心扉。
Sally
Feb 12, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I could not help laughing and think when I read this book. I stated to try different communication methods with my parents after I read it. Writing is a romantic and meaningful way to keep the communication in a long time.
Jasper Tong
May 20, 2020 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A good read, author Lung Ying-Tai showed all the interesting ways of communication between her son Andreas and herself through letters.
E.T.
Sep 05, 2020 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: chinese, prose
震惊于18岁的少年竟然会有这么多关于民主、人权的独立思考。还小几岁的菲利普在对人的观察总结方面也非常令人惊叹。喜欢《给河马刷牙》「我也要求你读书用功,不是因为我要你跟别人比成就,而是因为,我希望你将来会拥有选择的权利,选择有意义、有时间的工作,而不是被迫谋生。 」
Brit Cheung
Feb 16, 2016 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: on-growth

Will do the English reviews asap…perhaps?. The following is a Chinese version.

又看一遍,惊鸿一瞥,所用不过是假期里匆匆几日。你我皆知晓,短时间里看的东西形成的印象飘忽杳远,难以界定,不过还是必须记下一些所谓的文字,以安慰自己那几个不知怎么就不见了的日落月生的日子不算白白流淌过。

这是龙应台与儿子安德烈的通信集,收录了母子之间的36封过往记忆,普通却感动温暖了很多人,一个直观的原因是现在还有哪个儿子或女儿仍然会和当妈的可以在长达三年的时间跨度里穿梭来往如此多的书信而不加敷衍之词,谁还真正愿意表现出自己真实和朴素并且愿意同当妈的坦心交谈,且不论现实里儿女与父母间或明或暗的彼此沉默和隔阂,想下来不愿意奢望不多。

可能还有一个原因,这36封书信的起止时间,跨度为三年多一些,而这些信件中的某些篇章回信却是在不经意间写就的,安德烈旅游后,踢球后,周末闲无事之时,甚至是当妈的某个未入眠的某个晚上,虽然当妈的总是碎碎念“截稿期到了”“能不能再补充一点细节”,但就是那些真正的平实对话,那些淡然的细节与周转曲折而非郑重其事的说辞让我
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爾凡
Kind of philosophy about life, relationship, east and west tradition. The idea is very simple, but it is also hard and rare in typical aisa family. It comprise a patient communication to know each other from two totally diff cultural background. And in the result, readers gets most benefit during this interest culture conflict and reflect to themselves. I can tell the good educated relationship and communication could resolve it chasm.
Sheryl
Jul 26, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
龙应台与儿子安德烈书信交流的合集。老少皆宜的一本书。

摘抄:【我知道他爱我,但是,爱,不等于喜欢,爱,不等于认识。爱,其实是很多不喜欢,不认识,不沟通的借口。因为有爱,所以正常的沟通仿佛可以不必了。】

读着他们书信的同时,也在了解着中西方的文化。两代人、两个生活在不同文化背景下的母子,通过书信和MSN的方式来了解对方的生活和想法。虽然言语生活化(真的就是书信那样,你一封,我回一封;想到什么写什么),但我依然有读下去的欲望,依旧非常喜欢。读一本书,不是单一的读亲情;彷佛一场又一场的辩论,两代人之间的辩论,对政治、文化、习俗的辩论,以及对自我的检讨与认识。每一代人,每一个年龄段的人都有自己所迷茫、担心、和期许的事情,说出来,彼此才能被理解。

摘抄:【我们是两代人,中间隔个三十年。我们也是两国人,中间隔个东西文化。我们原来也可能在他十八岁那年,就像水上浮萍一样各自荡开,从此天涯淡泊,但是我们做了不同的尝试—我努力了,他也回报以同等的努力。我认识了人生里第一个十八岁的人,他也第一次认识了自己的母亲。】
Ivan Chan Chun Wai
Feb 14, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction
Kind of philosophy about life, relationship, east and west tradition. The idea is very simple, but it is also hard and rare in typical aisa family. It comprise a patient communication to know each other from two totally diff cultural background. And in the result, readers gets most benefit during this interest culture conflict and reflect to themselves. I can tell the good educated relationship and communication could resolve it chasm.
Yeung King Fung
Jul 22, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Zhang Stanley
I started reading her books as I was thinking about the importance of parenting.
But I learnt nothing.
It's just a record between her and her son
who are both quite lost in finding their place in society.
If you ask me if the author is a good parent or not,
I think the answer is obvious,
she's not.

But is she good at recording and making popular literature?
Definitely yes.
Ma Tak
Jul 23, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
這本書主要寫作者龍應台和她的兒子安徳烈寫給大家的書信。書裏總共有36封家書,它們都能讓讀者們知道她們母子一兩代他們的事情和溝通方法。本書亦紀錄了他們足足三年的書信,家書內容。這本書對兩位作者(龍應台和安德烈)來說,目的也是為了增加當代的互動,能夠溝通多一點,透過互動和溝通,他們就能彼此認識更多。我覺得這本書比較適合大人讀,因為我覺得如果小朋友看這本書,他們可能會不明白寫信的目的和信中的內容,所以我覺得這本書比較適合大人讀。
Ethan J
Oct 30, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
母子之间的书信集,有趣真诚,恐怕是中文书里面绝无仅有。希望不管是父母子女都可以读读,拉近距离
Kori King
Apr 05, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
很棒的一本書,看了兩遍。受到啟發很多。
littlefairyyyyyy
如果少一点站在高处饱含优越感的批判的话,分可能更高。中间部分显摆的成分略多,差点弃书。即使母子之间这般平等的对话难能可贵,但整本书Kitsch没毛病。道理我都懂,说来容易,做起来难。—hqc

“人生中一个决定牵动了另一个决定,一个偶然注定另一个偶然,因此偶然从来不是偶然,一条路势必走向下一条路,回不了头。我发现,人生中所有的决定,其实都是不回头的“卒”。”
Venice
Jul 20, 2013 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
沒有想過這本書會令人感到那麼傷心和無奈。一邊閱讀,一邊想,大多覺得自己幸運,因為我和我的父母不是來自不同的文化背景,我的父母不太複雜(我認為),他們不會想太多,因此,傷心就能少一點。真心希望龍應台和她的孩子都能找到一個較為舒服的方法相處吧。
又升 張
Feb 07, 2014 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Rocher Guo
Sep 12, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
A real family is unfolded.
Sweet, soft and easy to read.
Annie Yang-Perez
太久没有这样手不释卷的快乐了。这里有年长者的智慧,年轻人的睿智;东方的思辨,西方的观察;上一代的温柔,下一代的细腻;碰撞的精彩,比对的多面…… 这本书,包罗万象,论述人生的方方面面,却完全不枯燥无味,缘起于爱,贯穿着爱,也让我作为读者回馈以无限的爱。迫不及待想要分享给爸妈!
Bob Kwan
Mar 22, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
its truth about the reality of HK
Miriam
Feb 08, 2019 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
as far as being forced to read a chinese book goes, this one isnt bad. Wish there was an english version that I could read. Would devour that in 2 hours lol.
Shirley
象棋裡頭我覺得最「奧祕」的遊戲規則,就是「卒」。卒子一過河,就沒有回頭的路。人生中一個決定牽動另一個決定,一個偶然注定另一個偶然,因此偶然從來不是偶然,一條路勢必走向下一條路,回不了頭。我發現,人生中所有的決定,其實都是過了河的「卒」。
-龍應台
Zhuotun
Oct 26, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: recommendations
Quote1: 我要求你读书用功,不是因为我要你跟别人比成就,而是因为,我希望你将来拥有更多选择的权利,选择有意义、有时间的工作,而不是被迫谋生。

Quote2: 当你的工作在你心目中有意义,你就有成就感。当你的工作给你时间,不剥夺你的生活,你就有尊严。成就感和尊严,给你快乐。
Emily Chan
Aug 14, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
這本書是以龍應台與大兒子安德烈間的36封書信往來,集結成書。這本書亦講述了龍應台如何智慧的面對生活中的瑣事,特別是以一個母親的身份。這本書中還有許多值得分享、深入談論的地方,因為那些都是發生在你我身旁的事。這本書幫我和父母達成了溝通上的認知,並能理解對方的想法,值得推薦。
Sheila Chou
迥然的文化觀點,不同世代間的溝通對話,雖然龍應台本身的爭議性很大,但還是很欣賞龍應台在此書中展現出的睿智、包容,她和安德烈透過郵件往返探討了許多價值觀,橫跨世代與文化的隔閡,信裡的他們有衝突、觀念不合,也有動人的時刻,父母和孩子之間的溝通不是件容易的事,包括我跟自己的父母也一樣,太過熟悉的家人反而懶得花心思去付出,但是開始有交流總是好的開始,想要跨越親子間的年紀鴻溝,或許不是太困難的事情。
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