Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give
Inspired by her viral New York Times “Modern Love” essay “The Wedding Toast I’ll Never Give”, Ada Calhoun’s memoir is a witty, poignant exploration of the beautiful complexity of marriage.
We hear plenty about whether or not to get married, but much less about what it takes to stay married. Clichés around marriage—eternal bliss, domestic harmony, soul mates—leave out the...more
The easiest solution to making a marriage work according to Calhoun’s book? Don’t get divorced. She speaks on observations from her ...more
Ada Calhoun begins the book by admitting she doesn't give toasts at weddings:
I prefer to sit quietly under the twinkling lights, enjoying other people's efforts. Some are perfect mini-sermons — but better, because at the end there's champagne. Some go rattling off the
Her advice on not getting divorced? Don’t get divorced. The idea you’d take a bullet for your husband or wife - that bullet is infidelity. No easy advice here - and she backs it up with candid vulnerability and a ...more
Ada Calhoun's frank, eye-opening, and deeply thought-provoking Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give truly sucked me in from the first page. I'm not a huge fan of books that give marriage advice because in reality, I've found them to usually be condescending in nature or too "prim and proper." Ada Calhoun shattered all of those ideas I had about marriage books ...more
I found the second chapter, or toast, to be the best; the one that I really understood and felt strong, positive feelings towards. It made me feel optimistic, rather than depressed and out of my depth about marriage, reading as a single girl in her younger twenties.
A lot of this information about how marriage is a struggle and 86.9% ...more
Tomorrow, I will be 3 months into my second marriage. I loved it though perhaps that's because my first marriage was over a decade long, so I am familiar with what a long term marriage entails. But for those newlywed and still full of young love and hope and without the disillusionment that reality inevitably brings, this book is not for you.
It is for anyone else who has been married for a while. The author looks at marriage and the struggle of marriage. ...more
“Uncommon Type.” It is one of the best books I’ve read on the reality of the legal partnership of marriage, including its small hassles, big pains, overwhelming joys and, if you’re lucky, real comforts. This goes beyond the “happily ever after” of the wedding to the main event - and all that it can take out of you and all that it can give you … sometimes both at the same time. The author tells her own story ...more
Bold move, Tom Hanks.
Bad move, Tom Hanks.
Wedding Toasts I'll Never Give is a collection of anecdotes wherein Ada Calhoun shares that she cheats on her husband sometimes, but then flips out when another woman finds him attractive.
Girl gets points for being honest in a world where people like to pretend that, unless you never fight and never think of someone else naked, your marriage is a failure. We're all animals: we are going to fight and we are going to want ...more
Though there were some moments of insight and wit in this slim memoir-style book on marriage, I found the overall narrative to be disjointed and too slim on content to really feel like I gained much from it. I also found the tell-all style of the author to be less endearing or relatable than I think was intended, and the voice came across as often simultaneously smug and adolescent, which didn't endear me much to the couple's struggles and triumphs.
This book talks about just that. Why people stay married, well after the “wedding bliss” has disappeared. Ada, the author, is just a regular gal who chose to write about her ...more
I think this is the perfect book for every married person to read. Ada Calhoun recounts times in her marriage that'll make you stop and say, "Wait, you guys, too?" There's really something to be said about acknowledging the similarities in all marriages despite how different they can be. It normalizes ...more
I finished this book a month before my own wedding and feel it was the perfect read for this moment. My partner and I have been together for 7 years so I didn't want to read fluff about how marriage is this amazing celebration of love with rainbows and glitter (although don't get me wrong, I love glitter). Ada Calhoun talks about the hard parts of being in a relationship with another person, the work of takes to make that relationship successful, and the times when people screw ...more