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You Don't Know Me but I Know You

3.56  ·  Rating details ·  486 ratings  ·  130 reviews
Rebecca Barrow’s bright, honest debut novel about chance, choice, and unconditional love is a heartfelt testament to creating the future you truly want, one puzzle piece at a time.

There’s a box in the back of Audrey’s closet that she rarely thinks about.

Inside is a letter, seventeen years old, from a mother she’s never met, handed to her by the woman she’s called Mom her w
Hardcover, 336 pages
Published August 29th 2017 by Harperteen
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Average rating 3.56  · 
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Sarah Elizabeth
(I received an advance copy of this book for free. Thanks to HarperCollins and Edelweiss.)

“You’re going to think I’m insane, but – I think I might be, maybe, a little… pregnant?”

This was a YA contemporary story about a girl who found herself accidentally pregnant.

Audrey was an okay character, and she really did seem to take time over her decision and look at all the possible options after finding out she was pregnant. I understood how hard it was for her to break the news to her moth
“Anyone who ever wondered how much they could love a child who did not spring from their own loins, know this: it is the same. The feeling of love is so profound, it's incredible and surprising.”

----Nia Vardalos

Rebecca Barrow, an English author, has penned a heart warming and extremely compelling debut teen fiction called, You Don't Know Me but I Know You that is centered around a young high school teenager, who has a loving adoptive family, great friends and a charming and kind musician boyf
Rachel Solomon
Jan 26, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2017-favorites
Perhaps it's lofty to say Rebecca Barrow's YOU DON'T KNOW ME BUT I KNOW YOU is everything I love about contemporary YA, but it's 100 percent true.

I devoured this gorgeous gift of a novel. The writing is stunning, the characters' relationships are authentic and messy, and the dialogue is pitch perfect. The cast of characters is diverse in a natural way -- because that is our world. This book is BRAVE and it pushes boundaries and I cannot wait to discuss it with more readers!!

Highly recommend thi
Jun 26, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
How the hell do you just insert 20 crying emojis with 20 jazz-hands emojis?????
Stephanie Fitzgerald
Jul 04, 2019 rated it did not like it
Recommends it for: I wouldn’t.
Very disappointed with the life choices made in this book. Also a lot of very vulgar language used.
Really, really good. This book just feels so...healthy? Like, YDKMBIKY is to reproductive choice after consensual sex as EXIT, PURSUED BY A BEAR is to reproductive choice after rape. If you loved the latter, please read this too. I think it'll go a long way toward helping teens who've chosen the same path feel less alone and less judged. ...more
Audrey is in high school--leading a busy life filled with her art and photography, her boyfriend, her friends, and planning for her future. Audrey is also especially close to her mother, Laura, a formerly famous actress who adopted Audrey as a baby. Overall, Audrey thinks her life is pretty good. But things change dramatically when Audrey learns she is pregnant. She loves her boyfriend, Julian, and the two of them have been practicing safe sex. Yet, here she is, with some major decisions to make ...more
Vic James
Dec 21, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This charming, challenging contemporary YA goes for the sweet spot between Holly Bourne and Non Pratt and lands right on target.

High-schooler Audrey experiences not one but two unexpected upheavals: an unplanned pregnancy, and the arrival of a letter from her birth mother. Coupled with a falling-out with her best friend, Audrey's secure, loved life suddenly involved choices she could never have anticipated.

What could easily have become dark and difficult remains upbeat, as we see Audrey grow thr
(view spoiler) ...more
You Don't Know Me But I Know You is another book that has left me with very mixed feelings. It has a writing style that is easy to read, but without characters who really grabbed me, I struggled with reading this book. In the end, I would pick it up only to put it down and distract myself with another book. I guess I was expecting something different. Something that broke all the moulds and would make me care about this story, care especially about this girl and her journey through a surprising ...more
Danielle (Life of a Literary Nerd)
“The whole world is full of people trying to get through, making the best of what they have, pretending like they can pull it off. And there’s no shame in that.”

You Don’t Know Me but I Know You is a beautiful story of family, growth, and acceptance. It’s about making choices you aren’t ready for and finding the strength in yourself and those around you to know you will be okay. Audrey Spencer finds herself unexpectedly pregnant and must look at her own past, including her own adoptio
Laurie Flynn
I was lucky enough to read this book early, and I really fell in love with it. YOU DON'T KNOW ME BUT I KNOW YOU tackles difficult subject matter with both nuance and integrity, and Rebecca Barrow has created a cast of characters who feel like genuine people. (As an author, I know firsthand how difficult this is to do.) Audrey, the main character, has to make the most important decision of her life when she learns she is pregnant. Audrey's thoughts and emotions are chronicled so believably, and t ...more
May 09, 2018 rated it did not like it
Nope. Absolutely not. This was such a terrible read. I not only hated her decision because it was absolutely selfish but I couldn't stand her as a person. Her "friends" were terrible. I can't imagine being around people like that. Sadly I knew from the first few chapters these people were going to be unlikable. I'm sorry to have wasted my time on this book. ...more
Jan 27, 2018 rated it did not like it
I really wanted to like this, but it was just so... boring. It's never good when I start to skim parts of a book, like I did this one. There was a lot going on but at the same time, it felt like nothing was really happening, if that makes any sense. Some of the writing and dialogue was almost annoying in some spots? Maybe that's the best way I can think to describe it? If you were to ask me what the plot of this book is, I'm honestly not sure how I'd explain. Like I said, a lot of random things ...more
Paige (Illegal in 3 Countries)
See more of my reviews on The YA Kitten! My copy was an ARC I got as a reviewer for YA Books Central.

What is a privileged white girl like me supposed to say about a book this good? It defies words in that special way you only experience when you consume a piece of media that you love but also know you’ll never fully get because you’re not who it’s either for or about. Girls Trip is another good example of that. I loved that movie so much I saw it twice, but I’ll never know black womanhood becaus
*I received advance readers copy in exchange for an honest review. Thank you Edelweiss and HarperCollins*

This book is about a young girl making a decision on whether she wants to keep her baby or not. Audrey finds out she's pregnant and she has no idea what to do. Her birth mother gave her up for adoption when she was younger and Audrey finds herself in a happy family now without her. Audrey is faced with all the pros and cons of having a baby at 17. It doesn't help when her best friend-Rose is
Dec 14, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This was one of my favorite books that I've read yet this year. I think Rebecca Barrow's writing was spot on and the characters were highly believable. This book contains real friendships and problems, as well as a great storyline. The end though was slow for the last 50 pages or so. Nevertheless, I would definitely recommend this book. ...more
Mar 01, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
So happy to have once again had the chance to read this beautiful book. You want to put this on your TBR.
Katy Upperman
I'm not even a little bit surprised by how much I enjoyed this contemporary YA; its author is lovely and wonderfully sharp, much like her debut. I really can't pinpoint why, but it reminded me of my all-time favorite Judy Blume book, Just As Long As We're Together (though You Don't Know Me But I Know You is firmly YA). It's the story of Audrey, a girl who finds herself accidentally pregnant -- even though she and her boyfriend, Julian, have been careful -- and is forced to make some seemingly im ...more
This book was less about adoption and more about Audrey's decision regarding her pregnancy. The dialogue and relationships between the teenage characters are spot-on, but the writing lagged a little at times and not all of the background characters were fleshed out to their full potential. Barrow should definitely be praised for her use of POC and LGBT characters. Overall pretty good and fun to read ...more
Melanie Stanford
I had a chance to beta read this and even though it was awhile ago, I remember loving it. The writing and voice are spot on, and the characters believable and fully developed. I didn't always agree with their decisions, but that made them all the more real to me. This was a beautiful contemporary YA story and I can't wait to have the real book on my shelf! ...more
Jan 30, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
WOW. This book!!! This is an exceptional example of an "issues" novel done well. It treats its issue -- teen pregnancy -- with care, honesty, and nuance, but delivers an amazingly heartfelt and gripping story, as well. It honestly took the issue in a direction I didn't expect, and I LOVED that! Rebecca Barrow is definitely an author to watch. ...more
Paloma Villasenor
Aug 30, 2017 rated it liked it
Shelves: 2017-releases
Well well, after more of one month, I'm finally reading!!! But I sadly can't read more fast since university and homework is killing me.

Anyway, this book was cute but that's it. I didn't felt more with it. I know I don't like contemporary books and I thought this was going to be an exception but nope. It's still recommendable tho
Sydney | sydneys.books
If you like darker contemporary but don't want to feel burdened down unnecessarily, this is an excellent pick. We follow Audrey, a biracial teen who was adopted when she was a baby and then discovers she is pregnant. There's a huge emphasis on her friendships, particularly with one character, and a new girl moves to town at the beginning of the story. If you need more POC main characters or f/f romance this is a great read!

TW: *major spoiler* (view spoiler)

This is a debu
Sep 20, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
3.5-4 enjoyable and heart warming stars! I have been thinking about this one, Rebecca's debut novel is one that will make you smile throughout the book; not that there is lack of anxiety and heartache but the message conveyed from the book is so uplifting and heart warming that it makes you feel good after reading it.

This is a coming of age YA story about a teenage girl, who has navigated her way through her school, her relationship with her parents and her friends when an unexpected event happ
Lulu (the library leopard)
Uh. Wow. I'm emotional now. This was just a genuinely good book, honestly. I don't have any personal experience with teen pregnancy, adoption or (view spoiler), but I think Rebecca Barrow did a good job of handling a sensitive issue in a nuanced way that didn't feel preachy or turn into an Issue Book™.
So, oh book, let me count the ways I love thee.

*Strong relationships between women! Audrey has lots of women in her life between her mother and her friends, especially her
Joanne O'Sullivan
There is so much to love about this book. First, the female friendships: SO real and complex. Audrey and her best friend Rose are fully realized young women with their own strengths and weaknesses and their relationship (as well as their relationships with the other friends in their orbit) is so well done. Audrey's world is populated with an intersting and diverse cast of characters. The way Audrey's reaction/decision-making process unfolds after she finds out she's pregnant is the best depictio ...more
If I put my issues with abortion aside and look at this story, it's still two stars. The diversity felt forced; none of the characters seemed that authentic to me; there wasn't much of a plot. I liked that the adults were cool and the main character, whatever her name was, had a supportive relationship with her boyfriend, whatever his name was. And there was, like, some photography I guess? And it wasn't unpleasant to read. But at the end of the day, this book felt like it was written to dispens ...more
Carlie Sorosiak
Jan 10, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
You Don't Know Me But I Know You is a remarkably real and honest portrayal of what it's like to become suddenly pregnant as a teen. I adore this book. I love its rawness and its humor and its uncompromising exploration of an extremely difficult situation. Audrey is wonderful, and her story will resonate deeply with so many people. ...more
Sue Holmes
Aug 11, 2017 rated it it was ok
*Complimentary review copy provided by the publisher.
An easy quick read which deals with tough topics. But I felt the diversity and moral issues in the story were there just to tick boxes, not naturally part of the story.
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Rebecca Barrow writes stories about girls and all the wonders they can be. A lipstick obsessive with the ability to quote the entirety of Mean Girls, she lives in England, where it rains a considerable amount more than in the fictional worlds of her characters. She collects tattoos, cats, and more books than she could ever possibly read. You can find her on Twitter @RebeccaKBarrow.


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