How to Really Stink at Golf

by Jeff Foxworthy, Brian Hartt, Layron DeJarnette (Illustrator)

As a longtime golfer, Jeff Foxworthy has learned something important about the grand auld It’s not who has the highest score, it’s who has the least fun playing it. And now, in his hilarious primer How to Really Stink at Golf, Foxworthy shares his invaluable tips for a lifetime of horrible drives and putts.

• Get into the right frame of mind to play truly awful golf. Food poisoning or a killer hangover might be just the ticket to a robust three-digit score.

• Try to get to the course promptly at tee time to avoid the hassle of warming “You’re only gonna hit five good shots in the course of the day; why waste even one on the driving range?”

• The surefire way to screw up a great drive? As you walk to the tee, keep telling yourself, “Don’t screw up your drive.” If bad golf’s your goal, stress is your best friend.

• Avoid fun. “Fun = relaxed = low scores . . . and that’s something we want to avoid at all cost. If you have a good hole, shake it off.”

• Perhaps the most important Embrace the fact that you do stink at golf.

Cheating. Cursing. Avoiding fairways. Reckless cart driving. How to Really Stink at Golf covers it all, from selecting the correct putter to use on a 385-yard drive to prolonging your stay in the sand trap to picking the perfect foursome for spectacularly bad golf (“you, your ex-wife, your girlfriend, your wife”). With Jeff Foxworthy as your guide, even a scratch golfer can add ten, twenty, maybe thirty strokes to his or her score–and possibly more if you attempt to play the back nine, too.

Genres: Humor, Fiction

128 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2008

About the author

American comedian, mostly known for his "you might be a redneck if" jokes.

Currently he is the presenter of the game show "Are you smarter than a 5th grader"

Reviews

[Jan · Rating 3 out of 5]

A perfect description of my golf game.

[Jamie]

This was a short and funny read. I found this book at a library sale, it was fill a bag for $3.

[LC · Rating 3 out of 5]

A cute and relatable read.

[Gregory Drake · Rating 3 out of 5]

A relatively short book Spoofing the Game of Golf, and all those who are so very intent on playing their best possible game, with their lowest possible score ever. He shows that it is best to approach the Game of Golf from the position that the "glass is half empty," rather than "half full." My take from the reading is that the Game of Golf can be more fun when you accept the stress, the difficulty of playing a hole. Don't pretend that all is going to go so well that you might be considered the next Arnold Palmer or Tiger Woods. Just relax and have fun hitting the ball to the best of your ability, which you recognize may be the worst for a better player, even if your score is so far above Par that it resembles a Bowling score. The book has many extremely funny illustrations, to go along with each tiny chapter.

[Klein107139 · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought this book was good if you liked good short funny reads. I've played golf a few times and really connected to the book and the idea that golf can be frustrating and there is lots of ways it could go wrong. i really enjoyed this book and think you should try it

[Avis Black · Rating 1 out of 5]

I've enjoyed Foxworthy's Redneck series, but this is one of his flops.

[Jenette · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great book if you want a fast read and something that is hilariously true!

[David Richardson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Here is a real short and fairly funny book on golf. Only 113 pgs. with lots of illustrations, so you can read it in no time flat. If you like golf, this books for you.