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In Memoriam

4.41  ·  Rating details ·  117 ratings  ·  43 reviews
With one diagnosis, editor James Daniels learns that he's literally running out of time. Looking at his life, he sees one regret: Andy, the one that got away. Andy was the first man that James ever loved, but Andy has been gone for years, and might not want to be found.

But as his cancer progresses and James starts to lose his grip on time and memory, it might just be tha
Kindle Edition, 46 pages
Published October 18th 2016 by Lethe Press
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Average rating 4.41  · 
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'Nathan Burgoine
Nov 20, 2016 added it  ·  (Review from the author)  ·  review of another edition
Edit, September 19th, 2020: Hi all! Author here, being all authory. In Memoriam's rights were reverted back to me, and as of now, it's available on pretty much every e-tail platform (you can check for your fave via Books2Read). Pulling the book from KU was the only way to get it cross-platform, and given my Canuck audience (who are more likely to use Kobo) I'm pleased to be able to finally list it widely.

Part of the transfer also involves transferring the audio rights, which means I should be ab
Ije the Devourer of Books
A lovely short story and so beautifully written too.

I just think the entire story has a poignant feel to it. Just when everything seems so hopeless and impossible, hope emerges through the gentle twists and turns of the story. I dont normally like stories that involve going back in time or a reversal of time but this was done so well that I was lost in the story and found myself hoping against hope for a good ending.

And oF course the story delivers, not in a predictable way but in a way that ma
Shira Glassman
Jun 06, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: ppl who want romantic ownvoices gay sci-fi/paranormal
Achingly beautiful time-travel/playing with timelines #ownvoices gay romance.

"Hey, honey," she said. "You had a seizure."
"If it's a girl seizure, I'll name it after you."

Thus speaks James, the terminally-ill hero of Nathan Burgoine's In Memoriam, speaking to his lesbian bestie. This line reflects the dark humor of this beautiful paranormal gay romance, in which, close to the end of his life from undetected surprise cancer, he realizes his biggest regret is losing touch with That One Guy. As he b
I got this because I've been on a short audio kick, and though I didn't totally love the AB by Jerry L. Wheeler, I was pleasantly intrigued by the concept of this story and its execution.

James Daniels gets a fatal diagnosis (or does he?) and starts to reminisce about his life, mistakes along the way, and the one who got away. I won't get too much into the story because it's short but packs a full well rounded story.

I'd heartily recommend it (read it if you prefer) and you'll be pleasa
RoAnna Sylver
May 12, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: reviews
“That isn’t funny, James.” His exasperation was music to my ears. I felt them wheeling me away, lights passing overhead, bursts of white against my eyes.

“I’m laughing anyway.”

* * *

...I usually begin a book review (if I liked it!) with a favorite quote. With this one, another one popped into my head. Like the story itself, it's hard to get out of my head.

"If life ain't just a joke, then why are we laughing?"
- My Chemical Romance, "Dead!"

That sure is the question, and IN MEMORIAM might be as goo
For a short story, IN MEMORIAM feels so very large.

What if your life didn't happen the way you remember it did? What if the biggest regret of your life.. isn't? What can you trust when cancer eats away at everything you think you are.

Burgoine's story was so sweet and funny and heartbreaking and lovely. And I honestly don't know what to say about this that isn't already in the synopsis. Except : read this book.

4.5 "I edited books. I knew tragedy" stars
Cait Gordon
Jul 16, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: authors-i-ve-met
Some people can write a tome and not really tell a decent story, but then authors like 'Nathan Bourgoine can create an entire lifetime (or two) in a short work of fiction that cuts right to the soul. I'm so moved by this funny, heartbreaking, and poignant piece. It's masterfully crafted and makes me want to tell the people closest to me how much I treasure them. A must read. I'll not forget this story in a hurry. It might be the first work I've read from the author, but it won't be my last.
J.L. Merrow
Beautiful, thoughtful little story. Made me cry, but in a good way. :)
A.M. Leibowitz
The story is short, so my review will be short. This was exactly what I needed to read but hadn't known it. I picked it up on recommendation of an acquaintance when I said I was looking for something outside the usual romance. That's exactly what it is.

There's definitely a love story woven in, but it doesn't unfold in the typical boy-meets-boy, happily ever after way. It's warm and funny despite a somewhat grim plot. And it has what I would consider an ambiguous ending. We're never quite sure wh
Claudie Arseneault
May 26, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: lgbt, sf
I devoured this fairly short story somewhere between midnight and 1-2 am, getting immediately caught in the voice, the rhythm, and the peculiar, dark sense of humour. I very much relate to heavy, awkward jokes to lighten very hard and difficult moments (throwback to when I made a shitty pun in a hospital while my sister was crying from nurses not being to draw blood [j'ai dit qu'elle n'avait pas de veine, pour les francophones]).

Anyway. This was a wonderful and intriguing read, the length felt
I've been meaning to read some of this author's works since he was someone I enjoyed on the forums of BookCrossing back in the old days, and he has remained good friends with one of my dearest friends. This book turned the "meaning to" into "I'm glad I finally did". A great premise and story line, with James, faced with a terrible diagnosis and a very short time to live, faces the one regret in life he has about "the one that got away". I mean, who hasn't dreamed of the ultimate do-over?

Good wr
May 14, 2018 rated it really liked it
Wow this short packs a punch. I don't want to give anything away it just needs to be read. No steam, lots of feels.
Sylvie Howick
Aug 09, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Very powerful story. Made me laugh and cry. Nathan Burgoine is an amazing author and this book proves it. I would recommend it to everyone.
Feb 22, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: lgbtqia
I found this book thanks to the KrakenCollective’s personality test, where I was matched with James. I can see why: I have indeed heard the “not everything’s a joke” sentence a few times in my life. The need to lighten things up and make the people you care about laugh can easily be mistaken for not caring, while we’re simply coping. ‘Nathan Burgoine showed this masterfully.
I already knew I liked his writing, since I read “Handmade Holidays”, and this story proves it once again. It really is lik
Sep 14, 2017 marked it as dnf
I don't know if I'll ever finish this. Too close to home.
Feb 11, 2018 rated it it was amazing
It's nearly impossible to review this novella without spoilers, so let me just say this: James Daniels found a unique way to deal with the memory loss that accompanies his brain cancer, and said method is lovely and satisfying and heartwarming and sweet.

A beautiful piece of writing.
Aug 17, 2017 rated it really liked it
4.5 stars

Originally posted at For What It's Worth on 9/28/17:

Clocking in at 46 pages, I wasn’t going to review In Memoriam on the blog. I mean, what can you say without spoiling only 46 pages of story?

However, I read In Memoriam back in August and I still keep thinking about it so I’ll do my best to give my thoughts without giving up the whole game.

James, a book editor, is diagnosed with brain cancer and only has a short time to live. His biggest regret
Apr 23, 2020 rated it liked it
I'm pretty sure I found out about In Memoriam over on book Twitter and decided to give it a go because it was free and queer and I can never turn away from those two things.

At first this book depressed me because it's about a man who has brain cancer an is about to die in a few days or weeks. I was like 'why are you reading this depressing AF book. Chiara!!' but I pushed through and I'm pretty glad I did because the premise is INCREDIBLE. I would absolutely love to see this story as a movie beca
Kevin Klehr
Jan 10, 2017 rated it it was amazing
This is only the third piece I've read from this author, and definitely my favourite.

It's also a story I don't want to say much about as it should be experienced without preconceived notions from a review.

Let me just say, it's beautiful.
Dec 29, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Holy shit I just read the most magical thing ever.

Content warning for mc with cancer. This has time travel and it ends happily don't worry.
Helen Kord
Jun 17, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: m-m, contemporary, fantasy
This was a very interesting short story with fascinating premise that I enjoyed a lot but that I'm very torn about. I bought this book at random after some twitter recommendations and did the mistake of not checking what the book is actually about, which is something I do very often (most of the time, actually) and which is unarguably my own fault.

So when a friend (who I lend my kindle account to on occasion) told me I should absolutely read this book I had in my account for months, I did. And
May 19, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Nnngghhhh I loved this so much! Short and sweet second-chance romance, with a well-developed cast of characters, even with only 40-odd pages. Books like this are the reason I love short stories so much.

The audio performance . . . Well. The production was a little off due to inadequate echo control, and the female characters' voices were not well done. Still, I think this is the type of story that lends itself well to audio format, even though the execution was less than perfect.
Jan 12, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Nathan Burgoine’s novella about a dying man and his wonky brain manages to side step sadness and depression and make the reader begin to wonder - is this Sci-Fi, is the original reality real? Fascinating story I could not put down, Nathan continues to be one of my favorite newly discovered fiction writers.
May 10, 2017 rated it really liked it
quite short, quite sweet, quite sad, quite nice and actually a little confusing. This story is about the choices we make in our lives and the turns it takes because of those choices. The question: what would have been if...?
3.5 stars
Jan 04, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Woah. Super interesting. Bitter and sweet, twisting, unsettling, and weirdly hopeful in a way that kept me reading. Can't wait to read more of his longer works (have only read shorts so far).
Many of my favorite romances are, at their core, quite sad - and this is no exception. I loved this small story of one man's chance to re-do his life's major regrets.
Book #15 for 2018
Mt. TBR Challenge #9
The Legendary Book Club of Habitica's Ultimate Reading Challenge: A book with a queer/quiltbag/lgbt+ protagonist
Alphabet Soup: I
PopSugar: A book with an LGBTQ+ protagonist
Monthly Motif: March - Travel the World - Read a book set in a different country than your own, written by an author from another country than your own, or a book in which the characters travel.

With its kaleidoscopic approach to memory, loss, and grief, this novella put me in mind of Elysium
Jan 11, 2017 rated it really liked it
4 stars

From the blurb, I was afraid this would be kind of depressing but actually turned out to be funny and quite lovely. The Sliding Doors-like premise was really well done. This was my first book by this new-to-me author, but it sure won't be my last.
Nathan Frechette
I absolutely loved this story. A great idea, and very well executed. A short read, but it really didn't need to be any longer.
Nov 26, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: lgbtq-lit
Wonderful and intense
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'Nathan Burgoine grew up a reader and studied literature in university while making a living as a bookseller. His first published short story was "Heart" in the collection Fool for Love: New Gay Fiction. Since then, he has had dozens of short stories published, including in This is How You Die (the second Machine of Death anthology), and has released his first collection, Of Echoes Born (Bold Stro ...more

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“It didn’t feel right to die in summer. Autumn maybe. Or winter. Winter was for dying. Death shouldn’t have a UV rating.” 0 likes
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