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Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness, 2nd Edition: A self-help guide using cognitive behavioural techniques (Overcoming)

3.75  ·  Rating details ·  374 Ratings  ·  25 Reviews

Everyone feels foolish, embarrassed, judged or criticised at times, but this becomes a problem when it undermines your confidence and prevents you from doing what you want to do. Extreme social anxiety and shyness can be crippling but they are readily treated using Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT).

In this fully revised and updated edition, Dr Gillian Butler provides a

Kindle Edition, 400 pages
Published October 6th 2016 by Robinson (first published 1999)
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Somewhere round about page two hundred I found this was getting too difficult to read and I was obliged to turn to rereading Kafka's The Trial instead for some light relief. Now I am not sure if it was just one particular thing that I found painful or the abrasive effect of two hundred pages catching at me.

This book is part of a series - although a completely freestanding book - that apparently some Doctor's practises in the UK are providing / or recommending (view spoiler)
Jonathan-David Jackson
This book seems to be filled with lots of great, useful information. It contains a complete plan for freeing yourself from social anxiety. The only problem is that I'm too lazy to follow all the steps, so I will soon be checking out the book Overcoming Laziness.
Leonard Gaya
May 05, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Who has never felt awkward, out of place or otherwise inhibited when relating to other people? I for one, plead guilty! The aim of this book, which (as stated in the sub-title) is a self-help manual, is to shed some light on this rather widespread psychological phenomenon that, generally speaking, we refer to a “shyness”.

It is in fact a form of anxiety disorder, meaning: a feeling of distress that is out of proportions considering the actual situation we are in. Each individual is sensitive to d
May 29, 2009 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This is the first time I've read a self-help book and I found it immensely helpful, especially when utilized alongside therapy, my men's support group, and daily writing and journaling. The book is focused on helping you overcome social anxiety and shyness, as you might be able to guess from the title. It does a pretty good job, presenting the tools of cognitive behavioral therapy in very simple and effective ways, and backed up with plenty of exercises and hands-on activities so you can put the ...more
Kasandra Mavrigiannaki
Although I skimmed through quite a bit of a bit because it wasn't entirely relevant to me, there is some really useful information and tactics to use.
Mar 16, 2018 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
This book claims to offer a slightly unusual, CBT-like solution to a problem that plagues so many souls. It suggests techniques like relaxation, alternative thinking, and ignoring what's inside and focusing on what's outside instead. All nice and tempting; after all, you gotta relax and shut out your distracting inner noises in order to socialize, no?

Unfortunately, upon examination it doesn't hold much water. Except for alternative thinking; adjusting dysfunctional thoughts is a basic principle
Tian Liang
Dec 04, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Pretty good book in general. I loved the tips shared between the pages on how to deal with shyness and social anxiety, and loved the fact that they distinguished between it and social anxiety. However, one thing that I have to disagree is the point-of-view that bullies have high self-esteem. Very much on the contrary, bullies are people with high self-esteem. They feel really good about themselves! And they are charismatic, they are confident, and they're cool. I mean, in social psychology studi ...more
Susan Baumgartner
Mar 01, 2012 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Biased, inaccurate thinking can include: predicting faults ahead of time, mind-reading and catastrophizing during an event, and dwelling on a post mortem after an event. Have to agree there.
Lots of useful information in this book to help explain the hazards, and ways to prevent, living in a personal world ruled by anxiety. I'd give it 5 stars if it came with a therapist who'd followup with you to make sure you write in your journal regularly like you're supposed to. :-)
Ina Klaussen
Feb 04, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
En fin bok med praktiske hjelpemidler for å overkomme sosial prestasjonsangst.
Nov 15, 2014 added it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2014
I guess I've finished reading this (although I wasn't really reading it linearly), as I've finally had to hand it back to the library after starting work there a week ago, so that none of my colleagues would find out I'd been reading a self help book (the horror! the shame!). So perhaps the book didn't work 100% lol : ))

But still! Fairly solid advice, based on CBT, which I knew the gist of but it was nice to have worked through examples that were applicable to me. I found a lot of the exercises
Stine Fleming
Jun 29, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: sengebord
I've read the Danish version, in that translation the style was very American and the examples seemed very American, but the gist of the matter was clear and the tools were very helpful, once you start aktually using them on a regular basis. I definitly reccommend it to people struggling with anxieties concerning how you percieve others percieving you :-)
Jun 16, 2014 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: medical
Having had Cognitive Behavioural Therapy treatment, , and then reading this book, i found it not much help at all, sorry to say.
Jun 16, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Social anxiety and shyness is different for everyone, and Gillian covers many different causes and triggers that you might experience. Things you might never have thought of, like your own safety behaviors and inward attention are very helpful at getting a handle on your personal situation. Through step-by-step guidance, you'll learn to change your thinking patterns, do things differently, reduce self-consciousness, and build self-confidence.

Finding an ebook version took a little work. Amazon se
Oct 13, 2017 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Sam Bloom
Oct 16, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Arguably the worst titled and cover of a book I've read. However whats contained is some of the most valuable and thought out material. It's well laid out, providing the theory behind shyness and social anxiety before going into practical steps. Reading this book won't make you the life and soul of a party or turn you into some great oral speaker. But if followed right it will dismantle these cognitions/thoughts that for some are so detrimental and undermining. It's scary to think that such thou ...more
Jun 26, 2017 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I found the author's writing style extremely difficult to follow. The book is full of long, rambling sentences that start on one point and finish on another entirely different one. The punctuation was terrible. Reading this book was an infuriating experience, especially as I believe the underlying material is quite good. If only it was structured and edited properly!
Jan 28, 2014 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
The best self-help book I've read. It's practical and applicable. It's provided with worksheets to write down your thinking patterns and follow your progress. CBT sounds scientific and well-researched. I will read the book again at a slower pace to get the most out of it and apply the work step by step.
Jun 27, 2013 rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: abandoned
I couldn't even get into this book. I tried reading this with my partner and even he had difficulty. I thought that the first chapter was just packed with too much information and the author was trying to cram in everything she knew into one sentence. It was not very well written at all, so if you want a simple straight to book I don't recommend this book!
The book was not bad at all.
The beginning was really interesting and I did underline a lot of passages and parts in the beginning.
Then it started to become more serious.
It seems it can be helpful when following the worksheets and filling in information.
Literary Ames {Against GR Censorship}
*Bought in the UK Kindle Reading Marathon sale (Jul 2012).
Sep 09, 2013 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
It's easier said than done,It's really difficult but I'll try my best :)
Jun 02, 2016 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Good book. While not very captivating, even for a self-help book, it was still useful and informative!
Jan 16, 2014 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
everything I already know but in book form
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“Self-consciousness comes from focusing your attention inwards, on to yourself, so that you become painfully aware of what is happening to you. At its worst, self-consciousness dominates your attention and makes it difficult to think of anything else but your inner experience – and this can become totally paralyzing.” 1 likes
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