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Sons and Lovers

D.H. Lawrence,

Geoff Dyer (Goodreads Author) (Introduction)

3.63 · Rating details · 50,404 ratings · 2,217 reviews

"She was a brazen hussy."

"She wasn't. And she was pretty, wasn't she?"

"I didn't look ... And tell your girls, my son, that when they're running after you, they're not to come and ask your mother for you - tell them that - brazen baggages you meet at dancing classes"

The marriage of Gertrude and Walter Morel has become a battleground. Repelled by her uneducated and sometimes ...more

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Paperback, 654 pages

Published August 17th 1999 by Modern Library Classics (first published 1913)

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Nov 20, 2011 Richard Derus rated it did not like it

Rating: 0.125* of five

BkC51) SONS AND LOVERS by D.H. Lawrence: The worst, most horrendously offensively overrated piece of crap I've read in my life.

Yeup. Since I'm in a real bitch-slappin' mood, here goes.

The Book Report: Sensitive, aesthetic nebbish gets born to rough miner and his neurasthenic dishcloth of a wife. She falls in love with her progeny and tries to Save Him From Being Like His Father, which clearly is a fate worse than death. So, lady, if you didn't like the guy, why didn't you j ...more

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Dec 04, 2013 Cheryl rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: vintage, fiction, mesmerizing, fav-authors

The storyline is in the name, Sons and Lovers, but what you don't expect are the subtleties of the Oedipus complex or Freudian allegory. It was a surprisingly sensational read for me, especially since earlier this year, I gave myself a classics challenge: to read and re-read a few classics just for the sake of it; erase the disdain of forced-readings in high school, college and grad school; read just for how it makes me feel, not because everyone else is doing it. Sons and Lovers ends my pers ...more

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Dec 20, 2016 Cecily rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: classics, love-not-soppy-romance, historical-fict-20th-cent, class-etiquette

I started the year transfixed by the visceral floral and fiery passion of Lawrence's The Rainbow (my review HERE). Its rich earth ripened buds of promise into irresistible blooms of vibrant delicacy. But reading this at the end of the year, I felt more like I'd been dragged through barren mud. Perhaps that’s fitting for the story of a miner’s family.

There is lyrical imagery and “caressive” talk (see quotes, below), but far too much plodding Janet-and-John prose, and characters who infuriated me ...more

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Apr 27, 2014 Duane rated it really liked it

Shelves: english-calssics, reviewed-books, guardian-1000, rated-books

Generally considered Lawrence's masterpiece, it is ranked 9th on the Modern Library 100 best books of the 20th century. The story of Paul Morel and his brothers and the influence of the women in their lives, especially of their mother. I think the age old theme of men trying to find a wife or lover in the metaphorical image of their mother is present in all of Lawrence's novels, but more so in Son and Lover's than any other. It is beautifully written and the characters are well developed and ver ...more

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Jan 03, 2015 Jr Bacdayan rated it really liked it · review of another edition

How do you leave a mother who associates her life’s meaning and fulfillment to you and your achievements, without breaking her heart? How do you surrender all your passion to a lover while leaving some for the woman who gave birth to you, reared you, and loved you? Should a man give greater love to his mother or his lover? How do you achieve balance between the women in your life? D.H. Lawrence’s semi-autobiographical novel Sons and Lovers displays the pendulum of a young man’s love swinging to- ...more

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Dec 29, 2013 Perry rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: libri-classici

Being Smothered by Controlling Mother
Domineering Mommy

Coal Mining Son

"You made me cry, you told me lies
But I can't stand to say goodbye.
Mama I'm comin' home.
Ozzy Osbourne, Mama, I'm Coming Home, 1991.

D.H. Lawrence, one of my personal favorites, seems to have told a tale no truer than his largely autobiographical Sons and Lovers. While all the primary characters have some major defect of character, I felt the most pity for the protagonist Paul Morel (a real mama's boy) and Miriam (his chi ...more

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Oct 05, 2015 Apatt rated it it was amazing

Shelves: fave-classics

I had no idea what to expect of Sons and Lovers as I went in. I had no idea what the book is about, presumably multiple sons and more than one lovers are involved. With the public domain books just knowing that it is a classic is usually enough. I also had no expectation of D.H. Lawrence, I knew he is the author of Lady Chatterley's Lover, which I have a vague impression of being some kind of Edwardian porn (though it probably isn't). Diving in with no expectation is often fun and rewarding.

The ...more

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Jun 30, 2020 Luís rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: great-britain, e-5-favourites

In some editions, Son and lovers or lovers or sons are the fictionalized autobiography of the origins and youth of D.H.Lawrence.
The main character, like the great writer, was born in the world of the mining country of Nottinghamshire, a sensual father, drinker, choleric, vulgar nature and a mother from a higher background to the puritanical and bourgeois values permanently wounded by the unseemly attitude, the reckless acts and low appetites of her husband. This volume is a fascinating document In some editions, Son and lovers or lovers or sons are the fictionalized autobiography of the origins and youth of D.H.Lawrence.
The main character, like the great writer, was born in the world of the mining country of Nottinghamshire, a sensual father, drinker, choleric, vulgar nature and a mother from a higher background to the puritanical and bourgeois values permanently wounded by the unseemly attitude, the reckless acts and low appetites of her husband. This volume is a fascinating document on the daily lives of miners and their families: hard work, modest joys, pubs spent on the meagre pay on Friday. It bears witness to the development, the precursor to the creation of the Labor Party, of workers 'organizations, such as workers' cooperatives, solidarity funds, women's guilds and temperance societies. In contrast, feminist consciousness and aspirations are born in the developed layers of the population. It is also a pretext for the suggestive description of Nottingham, its monuments, nature, and the surrounding localities. But the main interest of this story is that of being, without any doubt, the most personal work of Lawrence, where the emotion of the thing lived is everywhere exposed. The Oedipus of the latter made, as well as the atmosphere of growing hatred of children for this father to the unworthy conduct, nonetheless exempt from a few rare moments of peace and relative happiness. David Herbert Lawrence, Paul Morel, appears as a gentle child, thoughtful, temperament artist, conscientious painter with delicate health, subject to bronchitis. These disorders will prematurely take the writer of tuberculosis. We follow his launch in life as a clerk in an orthopaedic appliance factory in Nottingham, the untimely death of the eldest son of the family, the first long-platonic love affair with the mystical, religious and reserved Myriam, then with Clara, a meeting marked by the seal of fleeting passion and the Dionysian impulse so dear to the artist. It is primarily in the narration of the fusional attachment with her mother that the work culminates. This love makes a balance of power, confrontation, grasping of the mother, and jealousy too; finally, the heart-rending agony of the latter and the deep distress that seizes the son at the loss of the irreplaceable provoke in the reader an unusual emotional tension - a troubling novel, moving and poignant. ...more

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May 05, 2021 Lena rated it liked it

Psychological drama about a man who's relationship with women are complicated by his intimacy with his mother. Uneventful but with deepest description of various human emotions, traumas and difficulties of love and passion ...more

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Mar 08, 2018 Khush rated it it was amazing

'Sons and Lovers' is an excellent book on several fronts. It is a story of a young man who is a budding writer. One sees the poet in him. He is sensitive, forlorn and deeply contemplative. He possesses all the mythic features we often assign to artists. We see him discussing books with his girlfriend, his delight at getting published and earning a little money. This aspect of his life, without his other difficulties, might be of supreme interest for those who harbor the same sort of ambition.

Thi

'Sons and Lovers' is an excellent book on several fronts. It is a story of a young man who is a budding writer. One sees the poet in him. He is sensitive, forlorn and deeply contemplative. He possesses all the mythic features we often assign to artists. We see him discussing books with his girlfriend, his delight at getting published and earning a little money. This aspect of his life, without his other difficulties, might be of supreme interest for those who harbor the same sort of ambition.

This young man is Paul who is extremely attached to his mother. His mother marries Walter Morel, socially her inferior, and later comes to regret her decision. Her oldest son dies young, and now she has nothing to hold onto in her life except Paul, her youngest son. She focuses all her attention on him. As Paul grows up, he begins to see girls. First, he meets Miriam who, like Paul, has a refined sensibility. They meet often and establish a good rapport. Although they share a great friendship, there is no passion in their relationship. To aggravate this relationship further comes in Paul's mother. She resents Miriam and thinks of her as 'deep', someone who can take her son away from her. She fears that Miriam seeks to possess her son's soul. Having lost so much in life, she makes sure that nobody comes between her and Paul.

Paul meets another girl Clara. With her, there is no spiritual connection, his relationship with her pivots only on passion, and therefore, it begins to crack as soon as it started. Paul's mother feels less threatened by her, though. One can imagine how a sensitive boy like Paul might have suffered in the web of these powerful forces, each pulling him in a certain direction – and tearing him apart.

What is so impressive about the book is that it captures the tensions and inner turmoil that this young boy grapples with. Lawrence goes very deep in portraying Paul and making him so credible. All his inner thoughts in relation to his mother, his violent father, his two girlfriends, his budding writing career are drawn with extreme care, love, and formidable talent. In addition, the tension that exists between his mother and him is dealt with so powerfully that as a reader I was absolutely lost in the queer vortex of their world. Who can repeat what Lawrence has achieved in bringing to the page what is so often lived by millions, but so rarely understood and discussed.

As I think more about Paul, I feel that there is something about him we do not know. Lawrence probably leaves that for us to figure it out. For instance, Paul's failure with two girls; his overwhelming and complicated relationship with his mother. Most of the time, ordinary people get over whatever close attachments they have with their parents – sibling or friends – once they have a close, intimate, passionate encounter with the 'right other.' However, Paul fails to take that leap.

Towards the end, his mother dies. He walks toward the lights, toward the city; Miriam and Clara, now, belong to another time and place. One can only guess what his walk toward the city meant. What is it that he could not find in spiritually inclined Miriam and sexually daring Clara? One keeps wondering. Even though a perceptive reader knows Paul very early in the book, he can feel Paul's deep desires and understand his profound melancholy. Since he looks for satisfaction in wrong places (or rather forced to do so considering the times he lived in), this brings pain, suffering and long spells of sadness in his life and in the lives of those who are attached to him. ...more

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Jun 12, 2020 Amit Mishra rated it really liked it

The novel is largely autobiographical and reflects Lawrence's life at Eastwood, Nottinghamshire before he left home. ...more

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Nov 02, 2015 Chrissie rated it did not like it

Shelves: love, audible, relationships, life-stages, classics, disliked, bio, 2015-read, england, returned

I read books for pleasure. I enjoy learning something new and thinking about human relationships. Real human relationships, not those of the fantastical sort. I want to have something to ponder. In addition I want writing that describes places, people and situations well.

I learned nothing new from this book.

The human relationships as described herein are not true to life. Maybe members of the Bloomsbury Group, of which D. H. Lawrence was one, did in fact communicated with each other with extre ...more

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Feb 03, 2020 Connie G rated it really liked it

Shelves: england, coming-of-age, classic, 1001-books

Sons and Lovers is a semi-autobiographical novel about relationships. Gertrude married Walter Morel, a fun-loving coal miner in Nottinghamshire. Their initially passionate relationship produced four children. But the marriage became very unhappy as the miner became abusive. After long hours in the dangerous mines Walter drank away a large portion of his pay. Mrs Morel attached her love to her two oldest sons. After the oldest son, William, died, Mrs Morel had a deep emotional relationship with h Sons and Lovers is a semi-autobiographical novel about relationships. Gertrude married Walter Morel, a fun-loving coal miner in Nottinghamshire. Their initially passionate relationship produced four children. But the marriage became very unhappy as the miner became abusive. After long hours in the dangerous mines Walter drank away a large portion of his pay. Mrs Morel attached her love to her two oldest sons. After the oldest son, William, died, Mrs Morel had a deep emotional relationship with her sensitive, delicate second son, Paul.

Mrs Morel hopes that her sons will have better jobs than her miner husband, and she makes sure that they attend school. She also wants Paul to marry into a financially prosperous family instead of attaching himself to a working class girl. Mrs Morel has an intellectual side, but her opportunities were limited because she is a woman. So she lives through Paul's experiences.

Paul is so emotionally bound to his mother that he has a difficult time loving or marrying a woman. He has a friendly relationship with Miriam, but feels little passion for the intensely spiritual woman. Then Paul spends time with sensuous Clara, a woman who is separated from her husband. They have a passionate relationship, but Paul is afraid of being bound to any woman. After Mrs Morel dies, Paul is no longer suffocated by her jealous love. But he seems self-absorbed, lost in his life, and drifting alone. Paul had worked as a clerk and as an artist, and there is a sense that he might look for a new vocation.

Sons and Lovers was set between 1885-1911, a time when miners were fighting for safer working conditions in the mines and better pay. D.H. Lawrence was able to portray the lot of the coal miner and the drab look of the mining town so well because he had grown up in those circumstances. Lawrence's life resembled the life of his character, Paul.

Although much of the book is wonderfully written, parts of the story were very drawn out and wordy. This novel is not for everyone since it does require patience. The reward is an interesting study of human relationships, and a look at the workers in England at the turn of the century. ...more

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Apr 29, 2021 Anne (On semi-hiatus) rated it really liked it

Shelves: librivox, audio, 1001-books, 2021, britain, classics

This is an excellent and complicated story of a "love triangle" within a coal mining community in Nottinghamshire, England. It is more than that but I am not going to describe the plot or other aspects of the story. I am only going to make a few points about the parts of this story which were ahead of their time in terms of the references to sex and desire. Paul's love for his mother, Gertrude, kept him from truly loving either of the two women he courted. Though Paul was well aware of this dile ...more

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Oct 30, 2017 Stephen P(who no longer can participate due to illness) rated it really liked it

There has been a robbery. A theft on a grand scale. Cleansed of the detritus of a self, a presence, an ability to act on desire, he waits to be alit upon…The fretwork strums a baroque dirge as an accompaniment to realizations of the smallness of any life upon the vastness of the universe and its grand seduction of infinite stars; the largeness of the interiority of ones passions and the labyrinth they must circumvent. Their interactions and the labyrinthine yearnings of others result in collisio There has been a robbery. A theft on a grand scale. Cleansed of the detritus of a self, a presence, an ability to act on desire, he waits to be alit upon…The fretwork strums a baroque dirge as an accompaniment to realizations of the smallness of any life upon the vastness of the universe and its grand seduction of infinite stars; the largeness of the interiority of ones passions and the labyrinth they must circumvent. Their interactions and the labyrinthine yearnings of others result in collisions sparking a cannibalism of blood spotted gore within their circumvented lives.

Lawrence writes this in the style of his time; a third person narrator who does not hesitate to drift from points of views occasionally to the detriment of the narrative’s pace. He dilutes the meaning of characters gestures and movements by explanation and confirmation. There is a doubt within him the reader will get what is expressed. This leaves less room for the reader to enter into the story but more room for the reader to be filled up by the characters? The author? The duty of the author to fill the reader up? The year is 1913. Readership was less sophisticated then? Yet, I can but imagine how scandalous the contents of this story burned within its package of seeded tropes. Generations tumble through decades. Psychologically steeped in acute vision he understands the psychoanalytic Oedipal situation bordering on the incestuous. Sex whispers through the sentences. His autobiography finding its form of fiction.

Paul finds himself strewn upon the rough edged rocks of a family living within a small English coal mining town. Gertrude, his sensitive mother married to a crude miner, has attached herself to her son’s, Paul, especially after her eldest has died. Quietly she mines an attachment to Paul that may also make up the lack of nourishment gained from her marriage. He a budding artist with little recognition from an often sodden father who is neither a role model or a mirrored reflection back for Paul to see who he is, who he might be as a man. He needs much from others as he grows but is frightened to ask or seek. Attracted to a woman he hesitates, falters, swings back and forth between betrayal of his mother and a withdrawal removed in layered shades from life around him, from any circumference of a globe he may safely enter. Left in a removed isolation alone but only occasionally lonely. This is a space leased to him fitted to his contours.

I hear somewhere deep within my inner ear an echo of Lawrence’s voice asking in an English accent to stop here. He warns that if I go on to describe the others, their relationships, the sucking ooze of life, I will be betraying him by stereotyping his finely wrought complex characters so completely themselves. He is right. Words will dampen their vitality confining them to less than they are.

In the end, this bold book crashing through time, illuminating its elastic taunts and tumbles, questions the minute and the vast, while spinning its compelling tale. ...more

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Mar 10, 2019 Dave Schaafsma rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: fiction-20th-century

Sons and Lovers is a 1913 novel by the English writer D. H. Lawrence. The Modern Library placed it ninth on their list of the 100 best novels of the 20th century.

In stark contrast, Goodreads reviewer Richard Derus has the most popular review here and one that made me laugh aloud, in which he begins: “The worst, most horrendously offensively overrated piece of crap I've read in my life.” He ends his review, ”If you, for some reason, liked this tedious, crapulous drivel, then goody good good, but ...more

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Jun 29, 2008 Cyril rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

I attempted to read this book twice years ago. I failed to finish each time, finding the novel laborious. Now, married and with children, I have read through this book eagerly. It is perhaps a half-lifetime of experience that has allowed me to see this story in a different light. The examination of Paul Morel's emotionally incestuous relationship with his mother and the way it cripples his love for other women is insightful. My Barnes and Nobles version of this book (I put this review under this ...more

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Oct 04, 2018 Alok Mishra rated it it was amazing

I have seen many people hating this novel. I ask myself - why? I studied Sons and Lovers during my MA in English Literature and found the novel amazing - yes, a little different if compared to what the usual novels offer. However, the very difference that we find in this novel makes us read it. Paul is a deep-personality who is often in a fix - which way to choose. His relationships are failures because he cannot push himself into any of those entirely. Clara and Miriam are like two distinct pol ...more

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May 08, 2021 Kathleen rated it really liked it

Shelves: setting-england, classic, philosophical

“No mother--I really don’t love her. I talk to her, but I want to come home to you.”

I thought I over-analyzed, but D.H. Lawrence is a master! You won’t find over-simplified romance here. The opposite in fact. Lawrence pulls out a multitude of distinct and passionate feelings from his characters, about love and family and dependence, religion and creativity and survival.

In this apparently autobiographical story, Paul Morel is the second son of Walter, an alcoholic miner, and Gertrude, a quite di ...more

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Feb 27, 2012 Matthew rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: favorites

“I have been reading ‘Sons and Lovers’ and feel ready to die. If Lawrence had been killed after writing that book he’d still be England’s greatest novelist.”
- Philip Larkin in a letter to a friend, aged nineteen.

It’s late, and I haven’t written any reviews for this site up until now, but here goes nothing. Considering the relatively abysmal ratings that Lawrence’s novels seem to have here, I figured I should at least add my two cents and say a couple things about what I feel is one of the better “I have been reading ‘Sons and Lovers’ and feel ready to die. If Lawrence had been killed after writing that book he’d still be England’s greatest novelist.”
- Philip Larkin in a letter to a friend, aged nineteen.

It’s late, and I haven’t written any reviews for this site up until now, but here goes nothing. Considering the relatively abysmal ratings that Lawrence’s novels seem to have here, I figured I should at least add my two cents and say a couple things about what I feel is one of the better novels I’ve read. Published in 1913, Sons and Lovers was D.H. Lawrence’s third novel, and is today generally considered to be his first ‘major’ work. An autobiographical Bildungsroman, S&L documents a time in the author’s life that was filled, in the words of Lawrence himself, with much “writhing and shrieking.” This work is often regarded as the first great modern Oedipal drama, and indeed it is the story of a mother who, stuck with a brute for a husband, turns her sons into something like surrogate lovers. No, that doesn’t mean that there is any incest in this book (if you’re looking for smut, look elsewhere; Lawrence’s reputation as a pornographer is undeserved), but it does mean that these sons, in particular Paul (the Lawrence character), end up finding it immensely difficult to get out from under the shadow of their mother and connect with the women they establish relationships with outside of the family.

It seems that most of the complaints about this work are along the lines of “it was too boring” or “I didn’t like any of the characters.” It is true that most of the conflict in the book is internal rather than external, but I’m unable to see how one could be anything but in awe of Lawrence’s command of the English language, as well as his understanding of the mechanics of human emotions. But if you need action, this book has its share: sickness, death, a killer fight scene, sex, temper tantrums…you name it. If the feelings or the relationships of the characters are not cut-and-dried, it is not a fault of the work. Lawrence succeeds in capturing the humanity of these characters, and for that reason I always felt sympathetic towards them. Granted, this is a painful book to read; no book has yet succeeded in making me cry, but this one may have come closest :_( . It is an excellent coming-of-age tale, and now sits alongside Joyce’s Portrait…as likely the most rewarding Bildungsroman I’ve yet read. Pity they couldn’t stand each other ha ha!

P.S.
I have the Oxford World’s Classics edition (which features a lovely painting by C.R.W. Nevinson on its cover), and in David Trotter’s introduction I discovered that the version I read was the Cambridge University Press version. This version, though far and away the most widely recognized, features extended cuts made by Lawrence’s friend and mentor Edward Garnett. The endnotes of my copy make reference to some of these cuts, including a lengthy one wherein Paul and Miriam meet at a library. Lawrence approved Garnett’s edits, but Trotter seemed to suggest that the original manuscript version is also in print. I've been unsuccessful in my search to find out more about this, but does anyone know if it is possible to obtain an unedited 'manuscript' copy? I know the Penguin edition is also the Cambridge version.

...more

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Mar 09, 2010 Alexander rated it did not like it · review of another edition

There has never been a book that made me want to inflict physical pain upon a character -- until Sons & Lovers that is...

The really devious thing about this dreadful book is that the Sons half, the first half, isn't all that bad. Lawrence spends an immense amount of time on what one supposes to be the backstory for the Lovers section. One learns of Paul's youth and temperment, Paul's mother, Paul's parents relationship and his brothers' exploits. It is time consuming and not always entertaining, ...more

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Sep 22, 2017 Jason rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: own

Love & Pain: self love & self-inflicted pain; familial love & the pain of resentment; romantic love & the pain of rejection; physical love & the pain of loss.

I did not love this book during most of the reading, I actually found it to be quite a pain for much of the time. This is not to say that there is not some beautiful writing and superb character development, because there absolutely is. I think I was just frustrated with all the pain - the pain inflicted on themselves and each other. The re Love & Pain: self love & self-inflicted pain; familial love & the pain of resentment; romantic love & the pain of rejection; physical love & the pain of loss.

I did not love this book during most of the reading, I actually found it to be quite a pain for much of the time. This is not to say that there is not some beautiful writing and superb character development, because there absolutely is. I think I was just frustrated with all the pain - the pain inflicted on themselves and each other. The relationships are largely toxic, but there is love between the pages too, if there weren't it would not be nearly so painful, nor so believable.

Let me go ahead and finish with the gripes straight off, shall I?:
The Nottinghamshire dialect was difficult for me for some reason. The use of dialect often takes some reading before the reader can become accustomed to it, but once they settle into the rhythm and patterns it contributes immeasurably to the immersion. For some reason, I found this particularly stilted and unnatural, and never could quite settle into the Nottinghamshire dialect. It shouldn't have been so - blame the reader for this one. This dialect was in particular used by the father, Walter Morel, and many pages would go by at a time without him speaking at all and when he did it was generally short, so perhaps my not being able to get a handle on it stems from this, but this also means it is not overly detracting.

Praise of sorts:
The story as a whole is psychologically fascinating. The title provides one with the frame for the entire work, we follow the Morel nuclear family relationships from their essential beginnings to their conclusion. Our primary protagonist, Paul Morel, is not focused on until the second part of the book, but everything prior to that provides the basis for the relationships to follow, especially the critical building material/blocks for the paramount relationship, the one between Paul and his mother, Gertrude. The individual characters are sympathetic, but often cruel and manipulative to one another.

A quick and vastly lacking synopsis:
Gertrude marries, but her husband, Walter Morel, turns out to be neither the man she would have preferred nor perhaps the man she thought he was. Walter is coarse and common, and one could debate on how much of his less favorable qualities are innate in him, and how much is brought out by his family's disdain for and exclusion of him. There is plenty of material showing how actions are all really reactions, the results of set relational dynamics and insecurities or misunderstandings. Gertrude, in her dissatisfaction, turns to her sons for companionship and purpose, but I think we see that this reliance on them is in some ways just as dysfunctional as the relationship she has with her husband. Paul was a sensitive child and jealous of his older brother which in time makes him more heavily influenced by and dependent upon his mother. As we follow Paul into manhood, we find that his relationship with his mother influences his romantic relationships. Paul's struggles with the female characters and within himself form the bulk of the second part of the novel. Let's just go ahead and say there is an Oedipus thing going on here.

Wrapping it up - with some praise of sorts:
I found this incredibly intimate novel beautiful and ugly in equal measures. At one stage I grew so frustrated with the characters that I began hoping for a violent turn for them, I think if anything that just demonstrates how effectively Lawrence is able to emotionally draw the reader in. This is a nuanced book wholly concerning it's characters and their relationships, the story is small and intimate, but complicatedly layered.
...more

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May 20, 2009 Kacie rated it really liked it

Warning: the book deals with sex. If you're sensitive to that, don't read the book or my review.

I loved this book. It reminded me again of my love for classic English literature. I love the realism in it. "Sons and Lovers" is essentially about relationships. I thought it was going to focus on the relationships of the mother in the book because the first part deals with her marriage and the stages it goes through. It describes the disintegration of love and what it's like to be a woman and have Warning: the book deals with sex. If you're sensitive to that, don't read the book or my review.

I loved this book. It reminded me again of my love for classic English literature. I love the realism in it. "Sons and Lovers" is essentially about relationships. I thought it was going to focus on the relationships of the mother in the book because the first part deals with her marriage and the stages it goes through. It describes the disintegration of love and what it's like to be a woman and have to rely on a man. Then it focuses on her relationship with her sons, and how she transfers that longing for love and hope for the future to her sons, to whom she is an amazing mother. In fact, TOO good of a mother, because the second half of the book is about one of the sons and how her overbearing love has affected him. Lawrence wrote the book to reflect his own relationships with his mother and then lovers, and you can see him trying to process that question we all ask, "Why do I do what I do?"

Lawrence was affected by Freud, who he knew through his lover (in real life), and he recognizes that his mother loved him in a co-dependant way that is perhaps too much like a romantic relationship without ever being sexual. He awknowledges that this leaves him quite dysfunctional in the two relationships that Lawrence has, which are reflected by the two relationships that the son, Paul, goes through in the book.

My predominant reaction going through the book was frustration the character's actions even when I loved them, which is a good thing, it's a sign of being sucked in to the story. The mother is held up as a bit of a long-suffering heroine matched to a loser drunk, but I was even frustrated with her. She's married to a simple man, but a man of joy and loyalty and fun... he's quite quaint. She scorns his simpleness, and I kept thinking... gosh, if she would love him for who he is instead of scorn him because of what he's not, perhaps he'd stay at home instead of heading to the pub for drinks.

Then it was frustrating to feel how trapped the mother is in her life as a woman in that time. She is an incredibly strong woman, and independent. She runs her home and raises her children and holds them together when the father is virtually MIA and totally useless, and begins beating her at times. What option does she have, though? She CAN'T leave, because she can't work. As a woman, she has no place to go where she could actually support a family if she left her husband, even in the worst of the abuse and neglect.

Paul, the son, is an incredibly introspective man who longs for beauty and love and connection, but struggles to love while he is so loyal to his mother, and she jealously holds him to her even as he's tentatively looking for a wife. It's so annoying, because you know the mother has placed so much hope in her son and therefore wants to hold him above a woman who might ruin him. In doing so, though, she IS ruining him, because he longs for a woman and yet can't give himself fully while his mother holds him back. When he turns to a woman who will love him physically, the mother accepts this because it doesn't involve his heart, only his body. This also is devastating, though, because the body only satisfies for so long and the soul cries out for a deeper connection, a deeper love.

I won't go into any more detail, but Lawrence is very, very insightful about the nature of sex and romance within relationships, and how it affects lovers. It is an intense, descriptive, and insightful work. It could be used in a counseling class about relationships. ...more

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Jul 03, 2012 Rakhi Dalal rated it liked it

Son - I want to review this book Mater.

Mother – Do you really now?

Son – Yes mother.

Mother – I would not advise you to do so.

Son – Why mother?

Mother – Because it will ask too much from you (READ - What about me then? There won’t be anything left for me of you.)

Son – You are being ridiculous mother. I wish to do it because I feel this is right.

Mother – Then do as you deem appropriate. I shall say no more.

Son - I will mother. You can’t hold me now.

So I finally decided to review this book. A midst v ...more

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Mar 30, 2020 Roy Lotz rated it liked it

Shelves: novels-novellas-short-stories, anglophilia, this-and-that

My reactions to this book veered from extremely positive to quite negative, so it is difficult to know how to begin. If you have an ear for prose, then Lawrence will seldom completely disappoint. At his best, Lawrence’s prose is lush, caressing, and aching. He evokes a kind of aesthetic tenderness that I have seldom experienced elsewhere—an intimacy between the reader and himself, a vulnerability that is disarming. In his strongest passages Lawrence is as meditative as Proust and as lyrical as K My reactions to this book veered from extremely positive to quite negative, so it is difficult to know how to begin. If you have an ear for prose, then Lawrence will seldom completely disappoint. At his best, Lawrence’s prose is lush, caressing, and aching. He evokes a kind of aesthetic tenderness that I have seldom experienced elsewhere—an intimacy between the reader and himself, a vulnerability that is disarming. In his strongest passages Lawrence is as meditative as Proust and as lyrical as Keats.

But this book is, unfortunately, not exclusively composed of Lawrence’s strongest passages. And as it wore on, I felt that Lawrence had exhausted his limited emotional range, and was overplaying his thematic material.

The premise of the book is quite simple: a woman in an unsatisfying marriage pours her emotions into her sons, who then become so dependent on her that they cannot form satisfying relationships for themselves. For me, there is nothing wrong with this (arrestingly Freudian) idea; but I did think that Lawrence beats the reader over the head with it. In general, I think it is unwise for any book to be too exclusively devoted to a theme. It does not leave enough room for levity, for spontaneity, for fresh air to blow through its pages. Sons and Lovers certainly suffers from this defect.

But the book’s faults become apparent only in the second half. I thought the beginning of the novel was quite beautiful. Lawrence wrote of the sufferings of a young wife with amazing sympathy. He manages to bring out all the nobility and strength of Mrs. Morel, while avoiding portraying Mr. Morel in an unnecessarily harsh light. The miner is a flawed man in a crushing situation, and his wife is a resolute woman with few options. Their tragedy is as social as it is personal, which gives this section of the novel its great power.

When the focus shifts from Mrs. Morel to her son Paul, then the quality generally declines. Paul is not as interesting or as compelling as his mother; and his problems seem like sexual hang-ups or psychological limitations, rather than anything diagnostic of society at large. Perhaps our own social climate is just not ripe for this novel. Nowadays we are little disposed to care about the inability of a young man to find complete satisfaction in his relationships.

In fairness, there are charming and insightful sections in this second part of the novel as well. I liked Miriam as a character and I thought the dynamic between her and Paul was compelling, if a touch implausible. (On the other hand, I disliked the reconciliation between Clara and her pathetic husband.) Even so, I thought that the writing became noticeably worse as the book went on, as Lawrence inclined more and more to repetition. The characters speak, desire, recoil, hate each other, relapse, and so on. It is tiresome and it begins to wear on the reader, who longs for someone to do something decisive and bring all this emotional dithering to an end.

I am hopeful that Lawrence’s later novels have more of his strengths (his sympathy, his lyricism, his tenderness) and fewer of his weaknesses (his lack of range, his lack of humor). As for this one, I will end where I begin, with a confused shrug. ...more

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Aug 03, 2020 Tim rated it it was amazing

Lawrence gives us a brilliant and highly perceptive depiction of a miner's family. Famously, there's a lot of autobiography in this novel and it rings with authenticity throughout. Although he barely says a bad thing about the mother she comes across as something of a bloodsucker and while he's constantly criticising the father he comes across as a decent and rather likeable man (except when he drinks). Later when the focus shifts to Paul's blossoming love life the novel does get a bit repetitiv ...more

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Sep 02, 2020 MJ Nicholls rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: senryu-reviews, penguin-classics, sassysassenachs, novels

Senryu Review:

Oedipus complex
plagues passionate painter man
in exquisite romp

D.H. Lawrence RANKED ...more

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Aug 13, 2015 Alex rated it it was amazing

Shelves: rth-lifetime, novel-a-biography, 2015

Of all the major writers in the canon, DH Lawrence is the horniest. Lots of people write about sex, but Lawrence writes exclusively about it, entirely about it. He's consumed by sex. Sex motivates everything that happens in his world. It can draw people together like in Lady Chatterley's Lover, or drive people apart. (Its energy in Sons and Lovers is not super positive.)

He thinks there's real communication to be had about what sex is like and why. He wants to talk about how sometimes it's not a Of all the major writers in the canon, DH Lawrence is the horniest. Lots of people write about sex, but Lawrence writes exclusively about it, entirely about it. He's consumed by sex. Sex motivates everything that happens in his world. It can draw people together like in Lady Chatterley's Lover, or drive people apart. (Its energy in Sons and Lovers is not super positive.)

He thinks there's real communication to be had about what sex is like and why. He wants to talk about how sometimes it's not as fun for the woman, and how one might help change that. He wants to discuss how sometimes it gets boring and then you have it in public just to spice it up. And he wants to talk about how sometimes you want to fuck your mom, which brings us to Sons and Lovers.

Paul Morel wants to fuck his mom so bad it ruins every relationship in his life. Everyone can see it. His dad, catching them at a "long, fervent kiss" late in the kitchen, nearly fights him for it. The two women in his life - passive Miriam who says "Yes," and Clara of the body - both know that they're competing with his mother and that they can't win. They're both willing to sacrifice themselves on the altar of his overwhelming horniness - "Let me be the sheath to you," says Miriam hopefully - but it's not enough.

And this is, by the way, Lawrence's autobiographical novel. He told Jessie Chambers, the real-life Miriam, "I've loved [my mom], like a lover. That's why I could never love you." Nice, DH.

For context, here we are near the beginning of the century. Here are prudish Virginia Woolf and shitting, twitching James Joyce, careening into modernism, changing the face of literature - and Lawrence, this son of a coalminer, off on the side doing something totally different: writing about sex, over and over, with a persistent urgency that's just as radical. It's not that it's dirtier; Ulysses is dirtier. It's that it's more serious. Joyce is doing it to shock you. Henry Miller, whose Tropic of Cancer (1934) was only a little after Lady Chatterley (1928), is much more shocking - but Miller isn't writing about sex, he's just jerking off while mumbling to himself. Lawrence isn't dirty, or at least not consistently (Lady Chatterley has its moments), but he's erotic. He's horny. That scene where he comes downstairs late at night to find a certain someone "kneeling naked on a pile of white underclothing on the hearthrug, her back towards him, warming herself" - that's, I mean, it's hot stuff.

Also it comes right after a scene where Paul (view spoiler) btw, which comes so unexplained that you're like yeah, that part is definitely autobiographical. (That scene was cut from the original edition, so that's a good way to tell if you're reading the unexpurgated version or not. The original cuts - around 10% - also trimmed out much of the stuff about William at the beginning, which probably improved the flow of the book.)

Lawrence's debt is to Hardy, who also wrote about sex but who was not as horny. They share a knack for vivid scenes; Hardy gives us, for example, swordplay in the ferny glen from Far From the Madding Crowd, and Lawrence delivers Clara and Paul slipping down a rain-soaked cliff of slippery red clay, slick with and stuck in the vermilion mud.

Her shoes were clogged with red earth. It was hard for her. He frowned. At last he caught her hand, and she stood beside him. The cliff rose above them and fell away below. Her colour was up, her eyes flashed. He looked at the big drop below them.

"It's risky," he said, "or messy, at any rate."

That it is, and here's a great book about it. ...more

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Dec 03, 2015 Pooja rated it liked it

Shelves: 100-pages

3/4th part of this book, I read word by word and could understand each person in the story and why they are as they are. At each point, they created sympathy in my mind for them, specially Mrs. Morel.

It took me 1 month to finally finish reading it. And I should admit that this one month didn't go all amazing. I thought each and every time about finishing it. And yet, it was, I feel, daring of me to did so.

It's kind of a frustrating book. It sends you off into abyss of depression sometimes, and t ...more

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Apr 16, 2020 Ruxandra (4fără15) rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: 20th-century, read-in-2020, ebook-read

oh GOD this dragged on... and on... and on...

"Why can't a man have a young mother? What is she old for?"
"Well", his mother laughed, "she can scarcely help it."
"And why wasn't I the oldest son? Look – they say the young ones have the advantage – but look, they had the young mother. You should have had me for the eldest son."
"I didn't arrange it", she remonstrated. "Come to consider, you're as much to blame as me."
He turned on her, white, his eyes furious.
"What're you old for!" he said, mad with ...more

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topics	posts	views	last activity
What's the Name o...: SOLVED. British Historical novel, early 1900s? Coming-of-age tale of young man who escapes limitations of a mining town via his drawings. [s]	7	23	Nov 12, 2020 12:37AM
What's the Name o...: SOLVED. Coal miner nicknamed "Mole" who is an abusive drunkard; from the perspective of his wife. [s]	3	24	Apr 02, 2020 04:49PM
Reading 1001: Sons and Lovers by D H Lawrence	2	22	Feb 29, 2020 05:14PM
Never too Late to...: 2019 July Sons and Lovers	22	30	Jul 13, 2019 05:04PM
Goodreads România: Citește cu mine: Fii și amanți, de D. H. Lawrence	12	55	Mar 05, 2018 10:08AM
Goodreads Librari...: Add reciprocal ACE info	3	13	Feb 03, 2018 06:35AM
Catching up on Cl...: Sons and Lovers - buddy read	76	84	Sep 08, 2017 11:58AM

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About D.H. Lawrence

D.H. Lawrence

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David Herbert Richards Lawrence was an English writer of the 20th century, whose prolific and diverse output included novels, short stories, poems, plays, essays, travel books, paintings, translations, literary criticism, and personal letters. His collected works represent an extended reflection upon the dehumanizing effects of modernity and industrialisation. In them, Lawrence confronts issues re ...more

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“Recklessness is almost a man's revenge on his woman. He feels he is not valued so he will risk destroying himself to deprive her altogether.” — 100 likes

“Sleep is still most perfect, in spite of hygienists, when it is shared with a beloved. The warmth, the security and peace of soul, the utter comfort from the touch of the other, knits the sleep, so that it takes the body and soul completely in its healing.” — 90 likes

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