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Five on Brexit Island

(Enid Blyton for Grown-Ups)

Bruno Vincent

3.04 · Rating details · 1,548 ratings · 234 reviews

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Hardcover, 103 pages

Published November 14th 2017 by Quercus Publishing (first published November 3rd 2016)

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· 1,548 ratings · 234 reviews

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Jun 03, 2018 Manny rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: parody-homage, children, history-and-biography

"Where is it?" said George irritably, as Aunt Fanny began to remove the breakfast things. "I've been looking for it all morning--"

"For what, dear?" asked Uncle Quentin.

"My copy of Five on Brexit Island, of course!" said George. "I just can't think where - oh Julian, you rotter - how could you!" And indeed her cousin was putting the book down with a satisfied smirk, having evidently just finished the last page.

"You beast!" said George indignantly. "You utter beast!" She would have continued, but ...more

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Feb 09, 2018 Natalie Vellacott rated it did not like it · review of another edition

Shelves: current-affairs

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

Julian, Dick, Anne, George and Timmy are sitting in a circle. They are staring at an anxious looking figure sitting in the middle of the circle.
"So, Mr Vincent, why did you decide to turn our exciting adventures into a political debacle?" Julian speaks first, he is the leader.
"Um, well, I thought it might be funny and I wanted to make a quick buck." The older man shifts awkwardly and casts his eyes to the ground.
"So, you exploited the much-loved and best selling Enid B ...more

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Dec 12, 2016 Paul Fulcher rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: 2016

Timmy was considered to be neutral,although if he had been capable of understanding the variety of sausages available on the European mainland, that could probably have been a deciding factor.

Part of a series of semi-satirical updates of the Famous Five series, beloved from my childhood, to the present day.

Five on Brexit Island has George, disgusted by the result of the Brexit referendum, declaring that Kirrin Island, owned by her family from the original novels, will itself declare independenc Timmy was considered to be neutral,although if he had been capable of understanding the variety of sausages available on the European mainland, that could probably have been a deciding factor.

Part of a series of semi-satirical updates of the Famous Five series, beloved from my childhood, to the present day.

Five on Brexit Island has George, disgusted by the result of the Brexit referendum, declaring that Kirrin Island, owned by her family from the original novels, will itself declare independence from Britain, with Julian, who had supported Brexit, arguing for staying with the mainland.

The series is endorsed by the late author's estate, whereas some of the other modern-day spoof rewrites (e.g. of the Ladybird novels) have relied on the exemption in copyright law for satire. This does mean that here we get original illustration from the novels, although the story could have been written so that they better fitted into the accompanying text, but also that any satire of the original series is rather gentle. The title Enid Blyton for Grown Ups would suggest a rather more risque approach than the author actually takes - the most we get is George swigging from a stash of whiskey that Uncle Quentin had stashed on the island years ago when courting Aunt Fanny, and Julian finding Aunt Fanny's own item she had hidden in response(view spoiler).

And the satirical take on Brexit itself seems largely confined to one easy target. Julian seems to literally turn into Boris Johnson (Anne notes that his hair has turned inexplicably blond and floppy, and his waistline expanded), complete with the ability to argue both sides of argument and sometimes confused which side he is on, old-Etonian mannerisms, a love for the culture of the continent (here cheese) but not the bureaucrats who he falsely accuses of banning various institutions of British life ("sarcastic apologies"), and, in case the reader misses the unsubtle clues, even being suspended on a zip-wire in front of press photographers, as he makes one of his trademark patriotic speeches:

To his own ears it was soaring,emotional and contained something of the majesty and bombast of Churchill at his best. To others, however, it was silly, over the top, pompous and repetitive.

Following the analogy George is presumably cast in the role of Nicola Sturgeon, although any resemblance of character is either absent or entirely in the author's imagination. Anne spends her time dreaming about various continental boyfriends who may now leave the UK, and Dick comes across as much more dimwitted than I recall from the originals.

Overall, the idea is a good one, but the execution, giving the promising topic matter, something of a disappointment. An enjoyable read but one can't help feel more could have been made, particularly of Brexit.

Although my verdict isn't as harsh as Timmy's on the Krexit referendum when he is awarded the casting vote:

Squatting down he laid his profound expression of the democratic process ...more

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Jul 07, 2017 David Sarkies rated it really liked it

Shelves: comedy

So, Kirrin Island is in Dorsett
8 July 2017 - Perth

I suspect that this book came out soon after the quite unexpected result of the Brexit referendum and is actually dripping with quite a lot of political commentary. Not only does the issue of being ruled by a faceless bureaucracy in Brussels, immigration, and some of the ridiculous EU laws come up, but the idea of the meaningless political speech is explored (including the orator who delivers a fine sounding argument but in the end has no idea w So, Kirrin Island is in Dorsett
8 July 2017 - Perth

I suspect that this book came out soon after the quite unexpected result of the Brexit referendum and is actually dripping with quite a lot of political commentary. Not only does the issue of being ruled by a faceless bureaucracy in Brussels, immigration, and some of the ridiculous EU laws come up, but the idea of the meaningless political speech is explored (including the orator who delivers a fine sounding argument but in the end has no idea what they are talking about). Notice that the cover has Julian holding up a sign suggesting that if they decide to vote for him then there will be 350 million pounds available for the Picnic Fund (which is a subtle dig at the claim that Brexit will free up more money for the NHS, and after the vote went through it turned out that that money never existed in the first place – hey, I was lied to, can I change my vote?).

The story occurs soon after the shock result, and the Five decide to go for a retreat to Kirrin Island. However, just before they head off, George posts one last Tweet saying that, in light of the fact that Britain will be leaving the EU, then she will be declaring independence from Britain (or at least Kirrin Island will be declaring independence). Since there are theoretically four inhabitants of the island (five if you count Timothy, who turns out to be easily bribed through the offerings of sausages), it has to go down to a vote and we end up having two sides – Julian for remain and George for leave, and two undecided voters, Anne and Dick (though as it turns out Dick always lets Anne do the thinking). The catch is that George's tweet caught on and the next thing they know the island is swarming with journalists.

This book is hilarious, and it is a good thing that I didn't write this series off with the one about the baby because even though it was funny, it wasn't rolling around on the ground type of funny. A new character is introduced – cousin Rupert, whom we are told was an unknown before the Five reached adulthood, and who is also a rather scheming individual who is always looking for a quick buck (and dresses in a rather expensive suit). Not surprisingly, with George's secessionist move (and apparently the West Country is full of secessionist crackpots), Rupert makes an appearance pretty quickly since he sees some rather golden opportunities coming his way.

However, the main theme of this book is how divisive politics has become these days. Sure, politics has always been divisive, but it seems to becoming much more so, and Brexit is a key example. Honestly, I'm not entirely sure what the leave campaign really wanted, nor is it clear what the leavers really expected to come out of the situation. Then we have this debate over a hard Brexit and a soft Brexit (and this whole concept of a Hard Brexit seems to have been tossed out along with Teresa May's majority) – why on Earth did the British government want to punish Britain for something that they were campaigning in favour of.

Then there is Jeremy Corbyn, who I have to admit is first of all not going anywhere, yet didn't seem to have an opinion on the whole idea in the first place (which means that I am really surprised that he did as well as he did, but then again it probably goes down to the old adage that oppositions don't win elections, governments loose elections). I should also mention Julian, who is described at the beginning of the book as looking a lot like Boris Johnson, and is a hard core free market capitalist and classic Eton scholar (I didn't know the Famous Five went to Eton). Oh, and I just remembered, I wrote a post on the whole Brexit cafuffle (I spelt that correctly first go) on my blog shortly after the result came through.

...more

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Jan 07, 2017 Kimbofo rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: humour

I grew up reading the Famous Five, so was keen to read this "spoof", but sadly the only really funny thing about it is the title. ...more

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Nov 25, 2016 Athan Tolis rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: humor

Don’t read this if you haven’t yet come to terms with Brexit; the angle is, let us say, not fanatically pro-European.

My background dictates I should have truly hated this book: My mom and dad are both (hello, matey peeps!) Greek. They had me in Chicago, they raised me in Athens, where I gradually became aware of the fact that I hail from an ethnic minority, and they sent me to college in Boston. From there I moved to Frankfurt for a year, before settling in London for the past 25 years, where I’ Don’t read this if you haven’t yet come to terms with Brexit; the angle is, let us say, not fanatically pro-European.

My background dictates I should have truly hated this book: My mom and dad are both (hello, matey peeps!) Greek. They had me in Chicago, they raised me in Athens, where I gradually became aware of the fact that I hail from an ethnic minority, and they sent me to college in Boston. From there I moved to Frankfurt for a year, before settling in London for the past 25 years, where I’m raising a family with a Japanese / American woman.

To my chagrin, our children are proudly and fanatically British, to the extent that my daughter wrote an invitation for Prince George to her 5th birthday, which we had to pretend we mailed. More poignantly, a year and a bit ago, Greece was playing Japan in the world cup. So I asked my son whom he’d be supporting. The only observation he could make was that it did not sound like England was playing…

And now, of course, it sounds like we’ve overstayed our welcome and we need to leave.

I should add here that as a young boy I read all Secret Seven and all Famous Five books (to which this addition is 100% true; Enid Blyton could easily have penned it) multiple times and also followed the adventures of Dick, Ann, Julian, George and Timmy the dog on Greek television.

In short, I’m precisely the type of guy who should have hated this book with a passion.

Call it Stockholm syndrome, call it what you like, I bloody loved it. I read it in one go.

You probably need to have lived here to find it funny. Don’t think it would work for somebody who hasn’t lived in the UK and has not followed the sundry ridiculous arguments surrounding Brexit in the UK press.

But if you’ve followed the Brexit saga from inside the UK and if you are at peace with our predicament, I think you will find it side-splittingly funny. The gags are cheap and they come at you thick and fast, often through sheer repetition, which is probably my favorite type of humor.

Or should I say humour?

I recommend you read it out loud, with your best John Humphrys accent. ...more

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Feb 27, 2018 Klinta rated it did not like it

This was just terrible. The time around referendum is perfectly described in this book. And you know what? I already had to live through that nightmare where everyone lies, no one knows what Brexit means (well except that “Brexit means Brexit”, right?) and no one can make an informed decision… so why would I read about it too?

That is the reason why I would like to say that this book is pointless. It is not funny, it just describes things that have already happened in a super weird way.

I though ...more

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Feb 19, 2017 Emma rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: recommedations, read-winter16, humour

Not as good as the other "Five for Grown Ups" book I read, Five go Gluten- Free. This one revolves around everyone's favourite referendum. Distraught that Britain has made the decision to leave the EU, George declares her intention to make Kirrin Island independent from the UK. Julian, who increasingly resembles Boris Johnson, opposes this.

It's an interesting idea, but it wasn't as clever as it thought it was, and the ending was weak. Unlike Five go Gluten Free, where the characters felt like ad ...more

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Jul 08, 2017 Paul E. Morph rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: books-read-in-2017

This one was more than a little heavy-handed. A harsher reviewer than I might even go so far as to say clumsy. Good job I'm not that guy.

It does have some amusing moments but I'd definitely rank this as the weakest of all the Famous Five parody books. ...more

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Jul 19, 2017 Sunshine rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: narrated-by-paul

This was weak lemon squash for me I'm afraid. ...more

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Oct 26, 2017 Julie rated it it was ok

Shelves: fiction

This was my first exposure to the adult version of a beloved adventure series written by Enid Blyton and avidly enjoyed during my childhood in England. I was both bemused and delighted to receive a copy of this book in a package sent from my son who resides in London, England. I began reading, however, I mislaid it part way through, and forgot about it for a while, hence the length of time it has taken me to finish what I would describe as a quick read. It does a fair job of explaining Brexit, i ...more

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Dec 28, 2016 Philip rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: fiction, british, satire

Cash-grab.

Not all that funny, not all that coherent (perhaps that's the point?) and not all that memorable. Having said that, I don't feel that I can honestly drop this to 1 star because this book didn't really elicit any feelings in me, either positive or negative. Mostly harmless, I suppose. ...more

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Feb 27, 2019 Shauna rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: 2019, humour

My least favourite of the 'adult' Famous Five series. Maybe it is because I can't find anything funny about the nightmare that is Brexit, but I did appreciate the bit where Julian gets stuck on a zipwire, a la Boris Johnson. Nice touch. ...more

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Apr 03, 2018 Margaret Bamford rated it liked it · review of another edition

Not as funny as I thought it would be but a good take on the Brexit situation.

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Mar 01, 2017 Timothy Burbage rated it it was ok

Shelves: 2017

This book was a light read that I got as a gift for Christmas.

As someone who was a hard remainer (and still is smarting over the death of modern Britain) I thought this book would be incredible aggravating. However, this didn't bring out the spite and bile that I feel towards Brexit. It was pretty funny in places, though some of the jokes really didn't hit. I had never read a Famous Five book, but I could pick up on when they were making fun of their previous adventures. The book was well made, ...more

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Mar 17, 2017 Gaynor Thomas rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Very cleverly done. I read this during the hoo haa around a second Scottish independence referendum, rejected by Teresa May on behalf of the UK government. It tickles me how many "Brexiteers" are incensed by the idea of an independent Scotland. The irony of it! So it was an ideal time for me to read this book, which tackles pretty much the same issues. I enjoyed it very much. ...more

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Sep 19, 2017 John Frankham rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: fiction

Only mildly amusing. And incoherent, unfortunately. Could have been so much better.

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Dec 14, 2016 Kirsty rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Parody books seem to be in vogue at present; walk into any bookshop, and the chances are you will be confronted by a large table spread with such things as We're All Going on a Bar Hunt in the first minute. I normally don't buy into bookish trends, preferring to choose my own, often marginally obscure, reads at my leisure. When I spotted that the Famous Five had been updated for the twenty-first century, however, I couldn't bring myself to let the books pass me by.

I was an enormous fan of Enid B Parody books seem to be in vogue at present; walk into any bookshop, and the chances are you will be confronted by a large table spread with such things as We're All Going on a Bar Hunt in the first minute. I normally don't buy into bookish trends, preferring to choose my own, often marginally obscure, reads at my leisure. When I spotted that the Famous Five had been updated for the twenty-first century, however, I couldn't bring myself to let the books pass me by.

I was an enormous fan of Enid Blyton as a child, and all of my copies of the Famous Five series have been passed down by my mother, a once avid reader of the series herself. We both laughed mirthfully at Five Go Gluten Free and Five on Brexit Island when they plopped through the letterbox just before Christmas. The other two titles which I purchased on a great deal from The Book People were the slightly less amusing Five Go Parenting and Five Go On a Strategy Away Day.

I'm still reeling from the Brexit decision, and thought I would begin with that parody. The storyline deals with the gang avoiding real life on the night of the referendum, and retiring to George's territory of Kirrin Island for a brief holiday. A fierce war soon ensues between George, a staunch remainer, and Julian, a traitor who voted to leave the EU. George is so horrified that she makes the decision that Kirrin Island itself should leave Britain, and holds her own referendum to that effect. Here, Vincent provides rather a light take on politics, which is both humorous and well-informed. The characters are still similar to their childhood counterparts, something exacerbated with the use of the series' original illustrations. I felt myself very much disliking Julian in this volume due to his beliefs, whereas as a child I had been relatively indifferent to him. Five on Brexit Island will not heal the pain of the referendum, but it is clever and well-crafted, and provides a bit of light relief.

Five Go Gluten Free was next for me. Rather than choosing to follow a gluten free diet for medical reasons, Anne - very much a fan of health fads - decides that the whole group should cut out the majority of the foodstuffs that they so love; no pies, chips, or beer going forward. I found this volume the most funny of the four which I have read, particularly as I so associate the majority of Blyton's child characters with a very British love of picnics and midnight feasts. The Famous Five are always eating, so the challenge of macrobiotic and wholefoods proves highly problematic. There are plenty of laugh-out-loud moments here, and a plethora of amusing one-liners. In this book particularly, the five translate very well to the modern world, and there is a marvellous feel of the utmost nostalgia to it.

My penultimate parody was Five Go Parenting, in which the group are given cousin Rupert Kirrin's baby; he and his Eastern European wife have been put in prison after another one of their illegal schemes, and six-month-old Lily comes to live in the surprisingly incredibly spacious London flat which the five share. This was an amusing look into the world of parenting by those who were utterly unsure as to what to do, or how much the addition of a tiny human could change their way of life. Witty and well-executed, Vincent's writing in this volume particularly echoes Blyton's. I would deem Five Go Parenting a splendid tongue-in-cheek gift for the new parent, or a funny slice of nostalgia for those whose children are a little older.

Five Go on a Strategy Away Day was my least favourite of the series by far. I awarded it a three-star rating, but didn't find it that funny at all, and indeed, there were no laughing aloud moments for me. In the book, the four human members of the group who, of course, work with one another, head into the countryside for a team bonding session. It culminates in an orienteering exercise, in which they are effectively up against all of the members of the Secret Seven. I did enjoy this merging of the groups, but found that here, the storyline was a touch lacking.

At just over 100 pages each, Bruno Vincent's Blyton parodies are the perfect reads to give as gifts, or to settle down with yourself if you have an hour or two to spare. ...more

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Nov 30, 2016 Sean Kennedy rated it liked it

I hope Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders et. al are seeing some royalties for these books, as they owe a lot to Five Go Mad in Dorset and Five Go Mad on Mescalin.

This is an amusing satire on the arguments for and against Brexit, and also a satire of the Famous Five itself. It is actually done quite well, imitating Blyton's style, and I find myself wanting to re-read the originals. The whole Brexit angle, however, still smarts. But I'm looking forward to getting the other books. ...more

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Nov 12, 2016 Ken rated it really liked it

Following on from the success of the Ladybird How Does It Work books aimed at adults for nostalgia five The Famous Five books have been produced this year.

Personally I never grew up reading the original Blyton books, but with Brexit being so topical compared to the others in the series I thought I'd pick this up.

Some really fun analogies as we see the gang on Kirrin Island during the EU Referendum.
A very enjoyable, fun and easy read. ...more

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Jan 02, 2017 Kat Fiction rated it really liked it

I was never a big fan of Enid Blyton books when I was a child. This was an amusing reminder of quite how annoying I found the Famous Five in the first place (even Timmy the dog... especially Timmy the dog). Maybe this is what we needed to stand back and laugh at ourselves post-referendum. Or maybe we can just keep arguing amongst ourselves at dinner parties. Either way, I may have lost my faith in humanity, but I've a new-found appreciation of Julian, George, Dick, Anne and Timmy. ...more

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Nov 20, 2016 Oscar Despard rated it liked it · review of another edition

This was an enjoyable satire on both Brexit and the Famous Five series. In some places, it jarred slightly, as it veered slightly too far into Brexit or too far into the Famous Five, but on the whole, the two themes were mixed very well in a highly enjoyable manner.

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Jan 02, 2017 Eilymay rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: funny

Not going to win any literary awards but a light-hearted satirical take on Brexit. A fun book.

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Nov 03, 2020 Iona Stewart rated it did not like it · review of another edition

This must be the worst book I’ve ever read to the end, and I did this in order to get the full, miserable picture before reviewing it.

Many people will have read Enid Blyton’s Five books as children. This is a famous Five book for grown-ups, penned by a different author.

The first hint of the book’s atrociousness was to be seen in the drawings, though the drawing on the front cover was beyond reproach. As previous readers of the Five books will be aware of, the Famous Five consisted of four child ...more

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Jun 29, 2019 Rosemary Standeven rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: hardcopy-books-bought-to-read

The United Kingdom has voted for Brexit, and the Famous Five were split over the referendum. Julian voted to leave, and the others to stay. Anne has repeated nightmares about her numerous European boyfriends who have had to leave her as Britain leaves the EU. All are going to miss French cheeses. Now, George has decided, that if she can no longer be part of the EU, then she will declare her Kirrin Island independent of the UK. Julian is utterly opposed to having the island “detach itself from th ...more

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Dec 03, 2017 Samu rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Shelves: 21st-century, immigration, fiction, britain, humor, ya

I suppose this could be interesting to the people who enjoyed the original Five-books. I read them as a child as well, but was never a huge fan. (Also, wasn't there a parrot? Or did I make that up?) These parodies (there are a couple more) are aimed at grownups who read the originals as kids but that's about all there is to these books. They are mock funny, but the funniest thing about this series is the titles. There is some actual political commentary too and some of it is interesting. Althoug ...more

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Apr 25, 2017 Joss rated it liked it · review of another edition

A bit like Marmite, this book seems to have garnered both love and hate reviews. I was never a huge Blyton fan, though I had read enough of these ones to recall the originals. Here the four children have grown up (the 5th being Timmy the dog) - but still visit Kirrin Island and decide to do so on the fateful night following the Brexit Referendum. Armed with smart phones, they learn of the result the next morning. Julian is delighted, but not George, who owns the island and who is so angry that s ...more

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May 06, 2017 James Kinsley rated it it was ok

Weak sauce. Maybe it's that that whole referendum business is still too raw, and the acrimony it stirred up still so tangible, or maybe the authorised nature of the spoof pulled its teeth a bit, but I failed to register a chuckle.
A couple of nice gags, but mostly the targets are predictable and the satire writes itself, to little purpose.
The Adult Ladybird books, the success of which this clearly seeks to emulate, have the advantage of brevity. Not that this is long, but long enough to stretch ...more

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Mar 28, 2020 Arushi Bhaskar rated it liked it

Okay, so honestly, I really don't think this is what Julian would be like as an adult.

Moving on, this book was an interesting, quick insight into the intricacies of politics. Brexit, one of the most significant political phenomena of recent times, is deconstructed- to paraphrase a famous saying, the political is indeed personal.

The ending could have been better, I feel. It was anti-climactic and underwhelming, and felt too rushed. But overall, I'd say read this if you're feeling even a little no ...more

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Jan 14, 2018 Paul Brown rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Five On Brexit Island is surprisingly politically neutral its mission only seems to be to highlight that the whole EU referendum is a joke and while their is merit in this observation it was never going to be a popular viewpoint considering the division caused by Brexit. I think the Famous Five parody series would be best steering clear of politics in future and sticking with the safe and formulatic sitcom plots.

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About Bruno Vincent

Bruno Vincent

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Bruno Vincent was a bookseller and book editor before he was an author. His humour books for grown-ups, co-authored with Jon Butler, were national bestsellers and have been translated into seven languages. The TUMBLEWATER books are his first for children.