I Have Cancer, Now What?: 12 Things You, Your Spouse, and Your Family Must Know in Your Battle with Cancer from Doctors to Finances, Romance to ... Caregiver Burnout and Everything In between

by Carson Boss, Cindy Boss

You have cancer, and you need the help and support of your spouse and family more than ever. I Have Cancer, Now What? includes information on how to overcome the shock and fear of diagnosis, how to talk to your spouse and extended family, how to consult on what you want from your doctors, where and how your family can give you support, the transition of normal household duties and how to manage those, the real costs of cancer, both financial and emotional, what you need from your spouse and family emotionally and physically, including romance, how to manage full-time jobs, and other long-term issues that will help you get the support you need.

156 pages, Paperback

Published May 9, 2017

Reviews

[Jane]

After my twin was diagnosed with cancer and even in her final days, I felt inept at how to help her (and myself) cope with the news. This book reads like a conversation between Carson & Cindy Boss, and then a third party mediator writes some additional tips. The book is divided into several sections, which should contain more listing of tips as opposed as to their actual journey. At the end, and I do appreciate hearing the accounts of cancer survivors and their families, it only focused on women having cancer--mostly breast cancer and not all cancer types so the title is a little misleading. What I took away from it was this (and it is something that I did throughout) was make sure that the patient is the one to make the decisions even about who is to know. It is, still after all, his/her life. The most helpful take-aways from this book are: 1) have life insurance all the time, 2) talk to your HR department and make sure that it doesn't "leak" any information to those who you don't want to know as well as check out the FMLA policies, benefits and whatever may be covered by your employer,

Topics not covered in this book include legal areas, such as the benefit of having a durable health care power of attorney and a property/custody will in addition to making sure that any property issues are resolved long before the final days when the patient can no longer make a lucid decision and is easily convinced to do what may not be in the best interest of those involved. The health-care decision or the call (if needed) to Hospice and how that impacts everyone, and the financial aspects, such as tax implications of fund raisers should also be addressed. It should also have recommendations on how to assume each other's roles early on in the relationship/marriage so that you can step in for each other if need be. It would also have been helpful if a glossary would have been in back to define terms like carcinoma, BCRA genetic test, and the various stages of cancer.

However, throughout the book there are several thoughtful quotations. Some of those are:

"True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evil. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island...to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing." -- Baltasar Gracian

"Time is more valuable than money. You can get more money,but you cannot get more time." -- Jim Rohn

"My grandfather once told me that there were two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit. He told me to try to be in the first group; there was much less competition." --Indira Gandhi