The Men We Never Knew: How to Deepen Your Relationship With the Man You Love

by Daphne Rose Kingma, John Gray (Foreword)

Asks women to develop more compassion for men by better understanding why they act the way they do, and then shows women, step by step, how to help men get in touch with their feelings. Reprint. Tour.

273 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1993

Reviews

[Catharine R]

Some interesting thoughts on building better relationships with the men in our life's. Although the book was written in the early 2000's Daphne was very forward thinking and we are head on at facing these male and female sore spots in 2024. Worth reading and my biggest take away and emotional sore spot came when she spoke of if woman really want men to open up about their emotions and if we are prepared to handle all that is hidden in a man's heart under the gaize of holding it all together and acting from a place of logic rather than emotion.

[Timesha]

I've read this book several times and each time I find myself understanding a little more about myself and the men in my life and around me. I would recommend this book to all the women who are having trouble accepting that fact that men have feelings too.

[Hillary Anderson]

I am a huge Daphne fan. In my mind she is a little discovered treasure in the land of relationship books. In particular her books Coming Apart and Thd Future of Love are wise well-written books that take an honest look at love in the 21st century....because at this point in the lives of modern Western people 'love' and relationships are sbout enhancing our lives......men and women no longer 'need' each other to produce field hands, save the family plantation, defend against enemy invasion etc. The Men We Never Knew takes it's place in the collection of Daphne's writing as a non-traditional approach and a welcomed one, one that encourages women to have compassion, empathy and patience for men when it comes to their participation in full on intimacy.

[Gemma]

The author makes some good points, like how the male role makes men afraid to be vulnerable, and like they have to carry the weight of the world.

But some of it was a little "out-there" for me. For instance, the idea that men feel inferior to women because they can't give birth. That sounds like the flipside to Freud's assertion that all women wish they had a penis. I'm a woman, and I sure don't! Too weird for me to finish.

[Beverly Dowdell]

After reading the "comments" from men throughout the book I realised I needed to change how I thought about how to communicate with men. So many important "signals" from my husband only became clear after reading Daphne's book. I have recommended this book to women who had split up with their partners - the men had moved out - due to their inability to communicate without an argument and then seen these same women able to reconcile with their man. One read is not enough.

[Swhite]

I remember this book making a huge impression on me. To me it helped me understand where men are coming from more so than how I could help them be more emotionally vulnerable. It helped me see the strengths each gender brings to a relationship and how to be mutually respectful of that.