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It Happens All the Time

3.57  ·  Rating details ·  2,584 ratings  ·  463 reviews
I want to rewind the clock, take back the night when the world shattered. I want to erase everything that went wrong.

Amber Bryant and Tyler Hicks have been best friends since they were teenagers—trusting and depending on each other through some of the darkest periods of their young lives. And while Amber has always felt that their relationship is strictly platonic, Tyler h
Hardcover, 320 pages
Published March 28th 2017 by Atria Books
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Average rating 3.57  · 
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 ·  2,584 ratings  ·  463 reviews

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Chelsea Humphrey
Nov 01, 2016 rated it it was amazing

If I’m being completely honest, this is the hardest review I’ve written to date. I won this book courtesy of Amy back in October and it’s been sitting on my shelf staring at me ever since. I had every intention of picking it up and getting this bad boy reviewed by January 1, but everytime I reached for it the lump in my throat and throbbing in my stomach won out and I chose an easier read. I’m going to stop right here and preface two things: 1) If you are wanting to go into this book
Apr 14, 2017 rated it it was amazing
My reviews can also be seen at:


IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME is my first read from Amy Hatvany. I'm surprised it's taken me this long to find her. I'm certainly looking forward to reading more from her after reading this novel.

This was an extremely engrossing read. It's an honest and unflinching look at some important issues that desperately need addressing.

Twenty-four-year-old Amber and Twenty-five year old Tyler are best friends. Both have had their own pers
There’s no doubt, regardless of your feelings for the topic at hand or the characters themselves, this is a thought-provoking read at its core. Amy Hatvany takes a bold step and strives to open a much-needed conversation with a story told not only from the perspective of a woman who gets raped, but from her rapist. Powerful in its prose, bringing light to the controversial topic of consent and victim blaming, it’s unwavering in its delivery. As a woman and a reader, I was a twisted knot of emoti ...more
May 02, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: favorites, must-read
4.5 Stars
Bold. Formidable. Raw. Visceral.
It Happens All The Time tackles a subject that is hard to write about. To be honest, I can barely form my thoughts about this book into words. I wish this didn’t happen all of the time. But if we are being honest, it does. And here, in this book, Amy Hatvany bravely brings this issue the forefront. A young woman, Amber, is raped by her best friend, Tyler, after having known him since she was a teenager. And he is the person she trust most in this world a
Diane S ☔
Mar 29, 2017 rated it liked it
For the subject matter alone and the attention brought to said subject, this book deserves a higher rating than that which I have given. So them why is my rating lower? So many reviewers are rating this higher and I once again find myself swimming upstream.

For the first part of the book I felt there was a decided lack of emotion, in telling of the beginning friendship of Tyler and Amber, Amber's medical and mental problems were quite significant, and yet I felt they were treated very matter of
Always Pouting
Amber and Tyler are best friends and have seen each other through some hard times. They never really had friends outside one another but Tyler has always be in love with Amber who hasn't felt the same. Tyler tries to accept this and be happy for her, especially when she comes home engaged after graduating college. Yet as the two start spending more time together that summer Amber's feelings seem to be changing. Tyler once again hopes they will become more than just friends until one night they g ...more
Lindsay - Traveling Sisters Book Reviews
4.5 stars! This was an intense, thought-provoking novel. I was happy that I read this along with Brenda and Norma as it sparked a lot of deep conversation. Highly recommended!

To see our full Traveling Sister Read review, please visit Norma and Brenda's fabulous book blog at :

Mar 28, 2017 rated it it was amazing
All of my reviews can be found on

I have to start by wishing Amy the happiest of publication days today! This is such a poignant, timely, relevant read and one that is vitally important. This book is powerful, and it tackles uncomfortable and difficult subject matter, but one that society has ignored for far too long and I’m giving Amy a standing ovation today for being brave and strong enough to tackle the ugly truth behind rape.

Rape. Such an awful word, isn’t it? It conjure
May 27, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Traveling Sisters Read Review by NORMA, BRENDA and LINDSAY

4.5 stars rounded up to 5

IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME by AMY HATVANY is a formidable, compelling, thought-provoking, and a bold novel that explores the emotional side of a friendship torn apart after a tragic night spent drinking, leaving lives forever changed. Exploring the fallout and betrayal of trust between friends.

AMY HATVANY delivers a brutally honest portrayal here of a subject matter that is hard to talk about. The story unfolds in
Brenda ~Traveling Sisters Book Reviews
4.5 stars

The perfect choice for another Traveling sister read with Norma and Lindsay.
Very thought provoking read that created some really good discussions for us.

All of our Traveling Sister Reads Reviews can be found on our blog:
Apr 30, 2017 rated it it was ok
I need to get this review over with. I don't want to write it because I didn't like this book, despite the fact that it has personal meaning to me. According to RAINN, an American is sexually assaulted every 98 seconds. 90% of adult rape victims are female. Females ages 16-19 are 4 times more likely than the general population to be victims of rape, attempted rape, or sexual assault.
Women ages 18-24 who are college students are 3 times more likely than women in general to experience sexual viole
Aug 11, 2017 rated it really liked it
What a compelling read. Unfortunately, this story is an all too familiar reality for many women all over the world. Tyler and Amber have been best friends for many, many years. Tyler wants Amber in more than just a platonic way, but Amber does not reciprocate those feelings. In fact, Amber is engaged and Amber only views Tyler as a best friend, nothing else. One night, fueled by alcohol, Amber kisses Tyler at a party. Tyler takes that as an invitation to advance their relationship to the next le ...more
It Happens All the Time is a book that discusses aspects of consent in sexual situations. The author has written alternating perspectives through both Amber: the girl who wanted to stop and Tyler: the boy who didn't. Intoxication along with a whole lot of internal issues were involved that created blurred lines. It Happens All the Time shows both sides of the coin in terms of verbal and nonverbal consent as well as the withdrawal of consent.

I didn't enjoy this book for a number of reasons. I di
Mar 30, 2017 rated it it was amazing
It Happens All The Time

Amy Hatvany

Amber and Tyler have been best friends since they were kids. Now Amber is engaged to Daniel and Tyler is struggling to keep his feelings in check. Tyler has been in love with Amber since he was thirteen. Sure Amber loves Tyler too, but only as a best friend. She knows that Tyler loves her but she has no idea just how much. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME is going to rip your heart out and shred it. What a heart breaking story that stayed with me long after I finished re
Judy Collins
One of my all-time favorite authors, Amy Hatvany returns following Somewhere Out There (2016) with her most emotional and timely book yet: IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME — an exploration into two different experiences of rape.

View the author's powerful video. Author, wife, mother, friend, rape survivor.

A girl. A guy. Childhood friends. Consent. Rape. Their families. A tragedy which changes everything. A desperate need for justice and revenge.

There is one thing (well, more than one) you can come
Oct 18, 2017 rated it really liked it
Angry! Upset! Disappointed! This book did me wrong!!! Shame on it for immediately sucking me in and making me get all the “feels”. Lol.
Thank you Atria Books for sending me an ARC!
This book is very heavy, and brutally honest. This book follows a pair of best friends named Amber and Tyler. Tyler has been in love with Amber since they were thirteen years old, but they've only ever been best friends, and Amber is engaged to this guy named Daniel. Then one drunken night, Tyler rapes Amber, and her whole world is shattered into a million pieces.

This book has a lot to say about our society and rape culture and the way we tend to blame
Ezi Chinny
I am sorry if my thoughts on this book offend an rape survivor but this book created some strong emotions in me and I felt really unsettled and unsatisfied with this book's ending. I get that the author was tackling a sensitive subject but I didn't quite agree with certain things. I needed time to reflect so I can write my review with sensitivity, yet honesty. I do not feel like I can be honest without victimizing people who have already been brutalized. So I will keep my words brief.

The book st
Karen R
Apr 08, 2017 rated it really liked it
“Amber kisses Tyler and what happens next will change them forever.” These words in the book’s summary grabbed me but made me uncomfortable. Rightly so. This was not an easy book to read. In fact, it was heartbreaking and brought back upsetting memories of my experience back in the 70’s as a teen. I commend Amy, who herself is a survivor of sexual assault, for the courage to write this book and start a conversation about victims’ rights. She writes a memorable story which will solicit strong emo ...more
Frank Phillips
Sep 03, 2017 rated it liked it
To say the least this is a hard book to review because of the subject matter. That being said, I thought that this book was going to be so much better than it actually turned out being, for me anyway. This is the first time I've read any of Amy's books and while I was disappointed at the end of this read, I will say I did still enjoy the way she writes and will still go and read the rest of her books at some point. I guess the main reason I did not overly enjoy this book is because I absolutely ...more
Wren (fablesandwren)
May 09, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 04-stars, ad-fiction
This book absolutely breaks my heart.

“There are some wounds unreachable by words,
some sins immune to apology.”

This is one of the hardest reviews to write because I feel like this has actually happened and it probably has actually happened to many women across the world. rape is a real thing. It isn't just a scary story to tell your children.

This book can get graphic and it probably has some triggers for people who have been through similar situations. I would read it at your own risk. As for e
L A i N E Y
The message is important and should be read/discussed/thought about from everyone. BUT I didn’t like the book as much as I expected to, even with the easy and good writing.

Essentially this just made me sad. And that caught me off guard. I just did not expect that I would felt this bad for him. But I did....

I have never read anything but this author before this but I do like her writing.


May 20, 2017 rated it liked it
Shelves: 2017, fiction, tlb
After reading a couple of Hatvany's works earlier this year, I was looking forward to having my library hold come through for IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. I was impressed by her ability to pen intense, emotional tales with hard-hitting subjects & expected this one to be no different. Unfortunately, the feeling of being severely underwhelmed was the only thing I was left with by the last turned page. Perhaps it was because I couldn't connect with any of the characters, unlike in her prior books when ...more
Oct 16, 2016 added it
It Happens All The Time is an important book for all women to read. As always, Hatvany addresses a very serious and timely topic in an in-depth manner. I believed until I read this book that Best Kept Secret was the most important of Hatvany's work as it addressed the suburban mom drinking issue. Now though, Amy Hatvany conquers an even bigger issue that literally could affect all of our daughters and sons.

Moms of teen daughters and sons, college moms and moms of millennials all MUST read this b
Nov 03, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Once again, Amy Hatvany has given her readers a book that explores a topic that is often in the news - date rape and consent. It was a tough book to read and readers are able to see the story line through the eyes of Amber and Tyler as they work to understand what happened and how they are going to live the rest of their lives.

Amber and Tyler met when they were 10 and became best friends. Amber always felt a platonic friendship with Ty but he was in love with her. She became engaged while in col
Mar 29, 2017 rated it it was amazing
I've just finished this book and it's so hard to put into words all my thoughts. Sexual consent is so critical to what we teach and what we ourselves learned growing up. My vision of a rapist wasn't the frat boy or the football player we flirted with. Yet I know that many of my friends were put into awful situations with our presumed friends. Read this book. Talk about it with your kids and your friends. Be aware and be a voice for change in our society. Amy Hatvany had given real faces to all t ...more
Elle G. Reads
Mar 31, 2017 rated it it was ok
Shelves: womens-fiction
Release Date: March 28, 2017
Genre: Women's Fiction

I hate to say it but... Well, this book was just not my cup of tea. For such an important topic that this book explores, rape, there was nothing about it that made me feel sympathetic in any way. And it truly should have as rape IS something that happens and has such a profound effect on the victim. Now, I will admit that I liked the fact that the author told the story in the victim and perpetrators point of view, however, I couldn't connect
Mar 31, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Amy Hatvany's latest book needs to be read by everyone as it deals with a topic that we 1) don't talk about and 2) place the blame on the wrong person — the victim.... the woman. Tyler and Amber are childhood best friends, but Tyler has romantic feelings for Amber. One night after they have both been drinking, Tyler and Amber's flirtation goes too far and Amber is raped by her best friend. Both of their lives are changed drastically.

While I've always known that a rapist is not the masked man bu
RoseMary Achey
Feb 27, 2017 rated it did not like it
This novel tackles an important and heavy topic, Date Rape. The two primary characters were poorly drawn and developed and elicited little empathy or engagement from this reader.
Sandra Cortez
Apr 03, 2017 rated it really liked it
This is probably the most difficult book I've ever read, it was emotionally heartbreaking. Was it perfect? No. There were moments I felt I was being preached to and obviously the author has an agenda HOWEVER the message is something I needed to read and I learned empathy is boundless. In today's society with the prevalence of rape culture and victim shaming this book is something we NEED. I encourage all to push your boundaries and check this book out. It's a message and a lesson that's necessar ...more
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Amy Hatvany was born in Seattle, WA in 1972, the youngest of three children. She graduated from Western Washington University in 1994 with a degree in Sociology only to discover most sociologists are unemployed. Soon followed a variety of jobs – some of which she loved, like decorating wedding cakes; others which she merely tolerated, like receptionist. In 1998, Amy finally decided to sell her car ...more

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