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You must only to love them
Recently divorced, Ann Marie decided to pursue her life dream of living overseas and accepted a position as a prep school English teacher in Istanbul. Ann Marie battled loneliness as she tried to make the most of her ex-pat existence, and her forays into the Muslim culture and the stunning landscape of Turkey brought them both close to her heart. This memoir is part travelogue, part adventure, and part romance. Now is your chance to vicariously experience life overseas, glimpse Islam from the inside, and perhaps make the leap yourself. If you enjoyed Elizabeth Gilbert's EAT, PRAY, LOVE you will enjoy this book.
- GenresTravel
292 pages, Paperback
Published April 28, 2016
About the author
Ann Marie Mershon
4 books11 followersA retired English teacher, Ann Marie Mershon lives on a woodland lake with her husband Jerry and their two dogs.
She grew up in a wooded suburb of Minneapolis, and in her mid-twenties she and her husband moved north to the wilderness they’d always loved. She has two grown sons who live in California and Puerto Rico. After 30 years of teaching English in Minnesota, she moved overseas to complete her teaching career in Istanbul, writing weekly e-mail missives and posting blogs about her experiences there.
Ann Marie discovered her passion to write in the late 1990’s. She penned a weekly newspaper column for five years, wrote numerous articles for newspapers and magazines, and published two books. Her first was a middle-grade historical novel, Britta’s Journey~An Emigration Saga, about the emigration of a family that settled near her home. Her second book, Istanbul’s Bazaar Quarter, Backstreet Walking Tours, was a collaboration with Edda Renker Weissenbacher, a Turkish woman who guided small groups on walking tours through Istanbul.
Ann Marie writes every day but always finds time for hiking, biking, swimming, kayaking, canoeing, skiing, or snowshoeing with her friends in the wilderness she calls home.
She grew up in a wooded suburb of Minneapolis, and in her mid-twenties she and her husband moved north to the wilderness they’d always loved. She has two grown sons who live in California and Puerto Rico. After 30 years of teaching English in Minnesota, she moved overseas to complete her teaching career in Istanbul, writing weekly e-mail missives and posting blogs about her experiences there.
Ann Marie discovered her passion to write in the late 1990’s. She penned a weekly newspaper column for five years, wrote numerous articles for newspapers and magazines, and published two books. Her first was a middle-grade historical novel, Britta’s Journey~An Emigration Saga, about the emigration of a family that settled near her home. Her second book, Istanbul’s Bazaar Quarter, Backstreet Walking Tours, was a collaboration with Edda Renker Weissenbacher, a Turkish woman who guided small groups on walking tours through Istanbul.
Ann Marie writes every day but always finds time for hiking, biking, swimming, kayaking, canoeing, skiing, or snowshoeing with her friends in the wilderness she calls home.
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Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews
September 10, 2017
Loved this recounting of her stay in Turkey. It brought back memories of my year in Turkey.
Ann Marie Mershon, recently divorced and living in her Minnesota home, decided to finish her teaching career overseas and in Turkey. Turkey? Yes, Istanbul, Turkey. A world away from Minnesota. Her stories tell of her experiences teaching (her students were great), her travels throughout Turkey, and living her day-to-day life.
For the first two years, she was an English teacher at Koc school which was in the outskirts of Istanbul, on the Asian side of the Bosphorus. She lived in teacher housing on campus. Eventually while teaching at Rogers College, she lived in an apartment near the school on the European side of the Bosphorus. At both schools, her students were the cream of the crop and eager to learn. She enjoyed the teaching and the students. On weekends or holidays, she traveled throughout the country. She experienced the Turkish hospitality and tea at every corner.
I enjoyed reading her stories. It brought back wonderful memories of my one year stay in Turkey.
Enjoyable.
Ann Marie Mershon, recently divorced and living in her Minnesota home, decided to finish her teaching career overseas and in Turkey. Turkey? Yes, Istanbul, Turkey. A world away from Minnesota. Her stories tell of her experiences teaching (her students were great), her travels throughout Turkey, and living her day-to-day life.
For the first two years, she was an English teacher at Koc school which was in the outskirts of Istanbul, on the Asian side of the Bosphorus. She lived in teacher housing on campus. Eventually while teaching at Rogers College, she lived in an apartment near the school on the European side of the Bosphorus. At both schools, her students were the cream of the crop and eager to learn. She enjoyed the teaching and the students. On weekends or holidays, she traveled throughout the country. She experienced the Turkish hospitality and tea at every corner.
I enjoyed reading her stories. It brought back wonderful memories of my one year stay in Turkey.
Enjoyable.
May 8, 2016
The story pulled me in and kept me engrossed, especially the descriptions of classroom chaos, trying to learn the foreign names of children, and the inevitable travel woes. I am also in a foreign country (Honduras) working with children. I operate a library at the public school of a small Caribbean island and devote my time to getting children to fall in love with books. I found this book to be a balm to my often discouraging and frazzled experience of living in a unfamiliar culture. Not everyone can handle the rigors of teaching and living abroad, as the book confirms.
The bonus for me was the author and I are the same age and we both love to be outdoors. I also visited her website and enjoyed the photos as I read. The pictures greatly enhanced the story, and who wouldn't want a peek at the many splendid travel destinations?
The bonus for me was the author and I are the same age and we both love to be outdoors. I also visited her website and enjoyed the photos as I read. The pictures greatly enhanced the story, and who wouldn't want a peek at the many splendid travel destinations?
September 19, 2017
Memoir of a kind and charming people, travel guide and language primer a la Michener
When Ann Marie Merson was offered a six-month teaching position at a private high school in Istanbul, she was skeptical about abandoning her retirement dream of teaching in Paris or Salzburg beneath the Alps and moving to a country near Iraq, where we were at war. But a heartfelt plea from the director, the charm of its bright-eyed students on the website and a generous pay scale soon convinced her to take a chance
Having spent several months in Turkey many years ago, I was fascinated to follow her adventure and immerse myself all over again in the fabulous architecture, great food and hospitable charm of Turkey. This westernmost Middle Eastern country has formed, over many centuries, a land bridge and traffic crossroads between Europe and Asia.
The author’s window into this country was a functional role, as educator, which thrust her directly into deep relationships with the country’s young people and hand-picked staff of skilled teachers. My own link was through a Turkish student in the US, whose well-placed family welcomed me to Istanbul with open arms, coached me in the rudiments of the language and culture and steered me toward a wide-ranging bus tour of Anatolia. Since they were curators of the Topkapi Museum, they also provided me with introductions to art gallery directors and sites to see along the way: in such historic towns as Pergamon, Kayseri, Konya, Goreme and Antalya. On my Turkish odyssey I saw olive groves medreses, or small residential colleges, where Islam, mathematics and astronomy were taught, and I made sketches of medieval Seljuk architecture. on the seven hills of Istanbul I drew the Blue Mosque, Sultanahmet and the ancient Hagia Sophia, and admired the city planning and architecture of Sinan, the great master builder of Turkey in the Renaissance era. The author reminded me of many Turkish words and provided a brush up on my vocabulary with the exception of the word, dolmush, communal jitney cabs, which made the rounds of the city’s public squares, picking up and dropping passengers and chargine each a modest sum for the number of stops traversed. Perhaps such public ride-sharing is too risky for today.
Mershon’s memoir not only shares a meaningful encounter with an ancient and very different culture from our own, it also has some of the historical a sweep and visitors’ guide qualities for which I have long admired James A. Michener, in such works as Iberia, Caribbean and Texas. I was reassured to learn that some 50 years after my own visit there, despite the region’s divisive conflicts, that Turkey’s people their culture and their surroundings still offer kindness, warmth and charm. ---Peter H. Green, Author of Radio: One Woman's Family in War and Pieces
When Ann Marie Merson was offered a six-month teaching position at a private high school in Istanbul, she was skeptical about abandoning her retirement dream of teaching in Paris or Salzburg beneath the Alps and moving to a country near Iraq, where we were at war. But a heartfelt plea from the director, the charm of its bright-eyed students on the website and a generous pay scale soon convinced her to take a chance
Having spent several months in Turkey many years ago, I was fascinated to follow her adventure and immerse myself all over again in the fabulous architecture, great food and hospitable charm of Turkey. This westernmost Middle Eastern country has formed, over many centuries, a land bridge and traffic crossroads between Europe and Asia.
The author’s window into this country was a functional role, as educator, which thrust her directly into deep relationships with the country’s young people and hand-picked staff of skilled teachers. My own link was through a Turkish student in the US, whose well-placed family welcomed me to Istanbul with open arms, coached me in the rudiments of the language and culture and steered me toward a wide-ranging bus tour of Anatolia. Since they were curators of the Topkapi Museum, they also provided me with introductions to art gallery directors and sites to see along the way: in such historic towns as Pergamon, Kayseri, Konya, Goreme and Antalya. On my Turkish odyssey I saw olive groves medreses, or small residential colleges, where Islam, mathematics and astronomy were taught, and I made sketches of medieval Seljuk architecture. on the seven hills of Istanbul I drew the Blue Mosque, Sultanahmet and the ancient Hagia Sophia, and admired the city planning and architecture of Sinan, the great master builder of Turkey in the Renaissance era. The author reminded me of many Turkish words and provided a brush up on my vocabulary with the exception of the word, dolmush, communal jitney cabs, which made the rounds of the city’s public squares, picking up and dropping passengers and chargine each a modest sum for the number of stops traversed. Perhaps such public ride-sharing is too risky for today.
Mershon’s memoir not only shares a meaningful encounter with an ancient and very different culture from our own, it also has some of the historical a sweep and visitors’ guide qualities for which I have long admired James A. Michener, in such works as Iberia, Caribbean and Texas. I was reassured to learn that some 50 years after my own visit there, despite the region’s divisive conflicts, that Turkey’s people their culture and their surroundings still offer kindness, warmth and charm. ---Peter H. Green, Author of Radio: One Woman's Family in War and Pieces
September 4, 2017
The name of the book, “You must only to love them,’ puzzled me and I wondered why an author would use such a title for a book.
After reading a few pages of the book, I found out why that name was chosen.
It was Uygar’s [a Turk] advice to the author when she asked him how she should deal with Turkish students at the Koc School.
The author’s style of writing and her vivid descriptions of places in Turkey kept me glued to this book.
Ann Marie Mershon is truly an adventurous woman and I admire her tenacity and ability to survive in a strange culture despite so many setbacks in her early days in that country.
I have travelled to many places in the world and never once thought about visiting Turkey.
Reading this book made me feel as if I have travelled there.
If I ever go there I will remember not to drink camel milk before I embark on any tours.
I enjoyed this book very much and commend the author for a brilliant account of life in Turkey.
After reading a few pages of the book, I found out why that name was chosen.
It was Uygar’s [a Turk] advice to the author when she asked him how she should deal with Turkish students at the Koc School.
The author’s style of writing and her vivid descriptions of places in Turkey kept me glued to this book.
Ann Marie Mershon is truly an adventurous woman and I admire her tenacity and ability to survive in a strange culture despite so many setbacks in her early days in that country.
I have travelled to many places in the world and never once thought about visiting Turkey.
Reading this book made me feel as if I have travelled there.
If I ever go there I will remember not to drink camel milk before I embark on any tours.
I enjoyed this book very much and commend the author for a brilliant account of life in Turkey.
December 6, 2019
Ann shares her years as an American living and teaching in Turkey, a culture foreign to her upon arrival but one she adopts and appreciates. She chronicles the challenges and rewards of working in an entirely different educational system, adapting yet sharing her honest frustrations and joys. Her love life and the constant pull of home and her passion for outdoor pursuits are nicely woven into her narrative, exposing the conflicts in her heart. She does an excellent job of sharing her growing love for the people of Turkey and traveling to see its treasures for herself. It is an excellent travel book as well as personal memoir.
July 7, 2019
A great view of this fascinating country and it's people
This book has brought back memories of my two ago in southern Turkey. My wife and I have fond memories of our time while I was stationed at Incirlik Air Force base. We had few, but great Turkish friends and acquaintances. One memory was of a man b bed Abdula who offered the use of one of his autos until my car arrived. Such generosity! I have thoroughly enjoyed Ann Marie's accounting her time in this wonderful country.
Thank you for sharing the memories.
This book has brought back memories of my two ago in southern Turkey. My wife and I have fond memories of our time while I was stationed at Incirlik Air Force base. We had few, but great Turkish friends and acquaintances. One memory was of a man b bed Abdula who offered the use of one of his autos until my car arrived. Such generosity! I have thoroughly enjoyed Ann Marie's accounting her time in this wonderful country.
Thank you for sharing the memories.
April 25, 2016
“You must only to love them” enchanted me. Ann Marie's story in many ways is my story. In its reading I relived so many memories of my time at Koc school: its teachers, my own Year 4 and 5 students, of hotel owners, pilgrimage sites, the Friday afternoon market bus, my own fears and joys, as well as the frustrations of a country which has such slow bureaucratic processes.
This is a sympathetic story about the Turkish people, their graciousness and hospitality. The many stories of friendly strangers suggest that Turkey is a huge village where everybody reaches out to help. Of course the exceptions don't disprove the rule. I find myself wanting to plan a holiday back to Turkey, this cross-road between East and West.
This is also a story of Ann Marie's search for connection and love after having ended a marriage and travelled to Turkey. Her honesty and self-deprecating style constantly drew me back in. I found myself in tears with the farewells, the broken romance, the isolation, the death of a dear friend and the string of medical emergencies so far from friends and family in a foreign medical system.
It is also a highly skilled teacher's memoir of the joys and struggles with Turkish students as they navigate their way through the IB and a challenging national system where the government and law courts seem to intrude into the classroom. It is an inspiring account of the tactics involved in engaging the as-yet-incomplete brains of Year 9 students (as well as the mature, delightful Year 12 students), about individuals who struggled with acute cases of ADHD, stuttering or the severe embarrassment of the perfectionist student not able to express themself in English. Ann Marie Mershon makes no pretence that teaching is easy. Rather, she weaves the challenges of teaching in Istanbul as one part of a life-changing adventure.
The story is also a cultural handbook for adventurous tourists. How could you go to Istanbul and not visit the artisans' workshops around the Grand Bazaar (of which Ann Marie previously wrote a tourist guide)? How could you not go exploring on foot the many delights described of this nation which proudly proclaims that it straddles both East and West (a reference to Istanbul straddling the Bosphorus) while 'facing West'.
“You must only to love them” is an inspiring account of an individual who faces considerable angst in moving to live in another culture and is rewarded in the most surprisingly rich ways. It is an inspiring and rewarding read and comes highly recommended by this (once) international teacher.
This is a sympathetic story about the Turkish people, their graciousness and hospitality. The many stories of friendly strangers suggest that Turkey is a huge village where everybody reaches out to help. Of course the exceptions don't disprove the rule. I find myself wanting to plan a holiday back to Turkey, this cross-road between East and West.
This is also a story of Ann Marie's search for connection and love after having ended a marriage and travelled to Turkey. Her honesty and self-deprecating style constantly drew me back in. I found myself in tears with the farewells, the broken romance, the isolation, the death of a dear friend and the string of medical emergencies so far from friends and family in a foreign medical system.
It is also a highly skilled teacher's memoir of the joys and struggles with Turkish students as they navigate their way through the IB and a challenging national system where the government and law courts seem to intrude into the classroom. It is an inspiring account of the tactics involved in engaging the as-yet-incomplete brains of Year 9 students (as well as the mature, delightful Year 12 students), about individuals who struggled with acute cases of ADHD, stuttering or the severe embarrassment of the perfectionist student not able to express themself in English. Ann Marie Mershon makes no pretence that teaching is easy. Rather, she weaves the challenges of teaching in Istanbul as one part of a life-changing adventure.
The story is also a cultural handbook for adventurous tourists. How could you go to Istanbul and not visit the artisans' workshops around the Grand Bazaar (of which Ann Marie previously wrote a tourist guide)? How could you not go exploring on foot the many delights described of this nation which proudly proclaims that it straddles both East and West (a reference to Istanbul straddling the Bosphorus) while 'facing West'.
“You must only to love them” is an inspiring account of an individual who faces considerable angst in moving to live in another culture and is rewarded in the most surprisingly rich ways. It is an inspiring and rewarding read and comes highly recommended by this (once) international teacher.
May 26, 2016
I love a good travel book and Ann Marie Mershon’s memoir, “You Need Only to love Them”, is all of that and much more. She not only tells stimulating travel tales of her travels throughout Turkey, Europe, and the Middle East, but she is able to add so many cultural insights gained from her teaching of bright young Turkish students at two quality private schools in Istanbul over a seven year period. Her relationships with students and her intrepid travels continually exposed her to warm “Turkish hospitality”, which helped to dispel any fears she may have had about being a tall blonde American in this majority Muslim country. Ann Marie takes her readers on a delightful ride through this adventuresome phase of her life as she searches for love and meaning, and finds both.
May 7, 2016
At the outset, full disclosure: I am mentioned in the memoir. That said, I can say with a great degree of objectivity that the book is a refreshing look at Turkey and at the life of an international teacher. While so many accounts of life abroad and indeed those about modern Turkey try to grab the reader by being negative, Ann Marie's focus on the positive aspects (and learning from things that go amiss) make the book a fast-paced, uplifting read. Ann Marie personalises every story with well recounted conversations and her turns of phrase make every person and event come alive. Heartily recommended for those interested in Turkey and for those who live, or want to have the experience of living, abroad.
May 15, 2016
I loved this book, and not just because I lived part of it. Ann Marie takes the reader on a courageous, bold, life-embracing journey that any of us might be able to take, but very few of us will. Her descriptions of her decision to embark upon this challenge; her clear love for Turkey and its people; her humor and courage as she met all of the challenges of her new life; and her great spirit of adventure and discovery are all truly inspiring. I find myself planning my next trip, as Ann Marie awakens and refreshes my love of the country. Do yourself a favor and read this inspiring, educational, and simply enjoyable book. You may find yourself with the courage and vision to take your own brave journey. I know I just might.
May 27, 2016
Like a beautiful Turkish kilim, the author weaves together her travels, her students, her teaching, her immersion in a new culture, her friendships and lovelife, and her sincere love of the Turks. Read it as a travel book, a commentary on teaching practices, the adventures of a single middle-aged woman in Turkey, or the blossoming romance between an American and the Turkish people. Just read it!
--> Take the time to peruse the amazing photos on the author's website; I read on my Kindle and scrolled the photos on my phone
--> Take the time to peruse the amazing photos on the author's website; I read on my Kindle and scrolled the photos on my phone
April 26, 2016
For anyone who's curious about life outside the US, you will laugh and cry with Ann Marie as she explores not only Turkey, but herself as well. I felt as if I were in her hip pocket as she described her years in the Turkish educational system and the struggle of belonging to two worlds. You hop into her suitcase with her and explore Turkey's culture, educational system and generous hospitality. A true delight.
May 7, 2016
What a delightful read! Having been fortunate to be a member of the tour group that Ann led, I looked forward to reading her memoir. Not only is it a wonderful account of her teaching experiences in Turkey, it is a testament to the friendship and hospitality of the people. In addition she shares her rich opportunities to learn about the history and landmarks of this amazing country.
May 8, 2016
Ann Marie had come to a changing point in life. Divorced, children grown, and approaching retirement, she set out on a new adventure. From the north shore of Lake Superior, she goes to Instabul to teach English to teenage students. Ann Marie writes about her love of Turkey, her students, falling in love and being a fish out of water in a very different culture. I thoroughly enjoyed this book.
October 3, 2016
I truly enjoyed Ann Mershon's book about living and working in Turkey for several years. She paints a vibrant, colorful picture of both the place and the people and also brings insight into what it's like to live in a foreign country far from family and friends.
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December 1, 2017This travelog was a delight to read as I follow in the author's footsteps in teaching in Turkey! My favorite quote was the words of wisdom from Uygar and the basis for the title: "Turkish students can be very loud sometimes and happy—also very sad if things are going wrongly. You must only to love them. Then they will respect you. It is a mistake to be harsh." Thank you, Ann Marie Mershon, for this delightful and endearing memoir of your adventures abroad the the wisdom you gleaned!
Displaying 1 - 16 of 16 reviews