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Raising a Secure Child: How Circle of Security Parenting Can Help You Nurture Your Child's Attachment, Emotional Resilience, and Freedom to Explore
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Raising a Secure Child: How Circle of Security Parenting Can Help You Nurture Your Child's Attachment, Emotional Resilience, and Freedom to Explore

4.25  ·  Rating details ·  229 ratings  ·  34 reviews
Today's parents are constantly pressured to be perfect. But in striving to do everything right, we risk missing what children really need for lifelong emotional security. Now the simple, powerful "Circle of Security" parenting strategies that Kent Hoffman, Glen Cooper, and Bert Powell have taught thousands of families are available in self-help form for the first time. 

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Hardcover, 280 pages
Published February 3rd 2017 by The Guilford Press
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4.25  · 
Rating details
 ·  229 ratings  ·  34 reviews


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Essie Lenchner
Jul 26, 2018 rated it it was amazing
A really amazing book. I'm not a parent or looking to become one, and read this book because I was curious about my own childhood and how one's upbringing affects adult life. I learned so much about myself, and got insight as to why my parens are who they are today, based on what I know about their childhood. The framework is useful for anyone, regardless of whether or not you are a parent. It has helped me reflect on my own childhood, and notice the behavior of the people around me, what needs ...more
Rebekah
Jun 21, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
like, 10 stars. this book represents the foundation of my parenting and beliefs about parenting; I'll reread it several times over the years.
Roger
Feb 01, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Contains very relevant, significant and important information!
Information is deeply important to humanity as it clarifies the fact that we grow, develop our worldview, model how to relate and be affectionate, our personality and self-esteem, we acquire our values to thrive, the ability to solve and face the problems of life , for the rest of our lives! ... and all based on the quality of attachment experiences with our primary caregiver.
The authors write this book with great clarity, sensitivity
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Lynndell
Received an advance reader copy in exchange for a fair review.
Thanks to NetGalley and Guilford Publications for the opportunity to read and review Raising a Secure Child by Kent Hoffman. This non-fiction book is all about parenting to help your child feel secure, comfortable and confident. As we all know, there's a lot of parenting wisdom and advice for the taking and it seems like everyone is willing to share his or her opinion whether it's wanted or not. This book describes a way to build self
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Poki
Mar 15, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Everybody should read this book! It's easy to understand, but leaves a big impact on your life!
Erica
Feb 28, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: parenthood
This book uses a concept called the Circle of Security to frame Attachment Theory (not necessarily Attachment Parenting) ideas. On the top of the circle, children need a secure base from which to explore. On the bottom of the circle they need a safe haven to come home to. Children move around the circle, sometimes very quickly, and it is the responsibility of their parents / caregivers to follow their need, while all the while being "bigger, stronger, wiser, and kind".

The good: The book is bliss
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Rachel
Sep 04, 2017 rated it really liked it
An insightful application of attachment theory to parenting--a very useful parenting book to reflect upon. Unlike many other parenting books, this one invites parents to trust in their own wisdom to some degree, rather than being highly prescriptive, and this book isn't guilt-mongering. This book will help you see how your own childhood experiences, psychology, and attachment styles may be affecting your parenting, and creates a useful model (set of principles, etc) about what you could do diffe ...more
Oliver Hodson
Feb 15, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This book took me ages but made a lot of sense to me. I think the strengths of the circle of security approach are that it's core concepts seem true. Kids want a parent who is bigger, wiser, stronger and kind, and parents want to be that. It is easy to see your kids behave in the 'explore' and 'come back for comfort' outlined in the circle. And the way that they explain unmet needs and parent and child behaviour is in line with what i've seen in my own kids and the families around me.

I worked ou
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Kimber
Jun 21, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: babies
What this book has to say about parenting and the importance of attachment is truly incredible. Even for nonparents, this book can tell you a lot the way you were patented and how that has long term effects on the relationships in your life. I have been telling everyone about this book, and would wholeheartedly recommend it to any parents especially. In a nonjudgmental and loving way, the authors help the reader identify areas where they have emotional triggers or shortcomings. They then give yo ...more
Bethany
May 01, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: babbies
This is a really wonderful parenting book, and also manages to be a book about self discovery. The book emphasizes that people typically struggle with one of several areas in relationships, and then specifically relates those areas to parenting. The book provides countless examples of behavior and less desirable parent reactions, and then better ways to respond going forward. I appreciated the authors' emphasis on apologizing to our children but without losing the status of being the stronger, w ...more
Silvana Albu
Jul 20, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: baby-books
Very informative and full of examples. I listened to it as an audio book and I found it a bit repetitive. The same idea was reiterated multiple times and I think I wouldn't have had the patience to actually read it page by page if it weren't narrated. I did like the proposed ideas and the examples at the end. Multiple scenarios were played out and potential reactions from the parents varied based on their own issues and insecurities. I liked that they offered one of the "good answers" as well to ...more
Kristi Brokaw
Jul 11, 2018 rated it really liked it
This is the kindest parenting manual I have ever picked up. I love the approach and the practical examples throughout the book. Like most parenting books, it did get a little repetitive and became hard to keep reading momentum. I believe the last section of the book would be most helpful in a group or class, which is not the context in which I read it. I wish I had read this when my oldest was a baby.
Jennifer James
Sep 22, 2018 rated it liked it
While I felt that the information provided on attachment parenting was excellent and well researched, I had difficulty following all of the references to "the top of the circle" and "the bottom of the circle." It might have been different if I had the hard copy of the book and could reference a diagram, but I spent quite a bit of time wondering what they were talking about as it was.
Louise Sullivan
Jul 29, 2018 rated it it was amazing
The circle of security is a way that parents, teachers, and anyone else who work with children can enable those children to develop secure attachment relationships despite exposure to adverse trauma in their lives. I find this book to be very valuable not only for parents but for any adult who is interested in exploring their own attachment journey.
Bailey
I read this more as a self-help book, since I don't have kids. If I could give it 10 stars, I would. It was so blameless, unshaming, encouraging, and clear about the interpersonal patterns we find ourselves in. If I could only use one word, it would be "true."
Chelsea Ohlmann
Jan 18, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This is a phenomenal book. I've loved the Circle of Security approach to parenting and was so happy they made a book that is accessible to everyone. It is an approach grounded in relevant attachment research and I learned a lot about myself as I read it.
Anna
Jan 17, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Good book for new parents or anyone wanting to delve into their past or current relationships through attachment styles. Easily digestible and gave a lot of examples. Would recommend to new or struggling parents.
Bianca
Sep 17, 2018 rated it really liked it
I am not a parent, but I did read this book for work. I learnt so much through it and would definitely recommend it to all future parents. Being-with is such an important parenting concept that I had never really considered prior.
Emmanuel Ayeni
Nov 02, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This book shares with every parent from an expert point of view of raising children who are confident and balanced in emotion learning and growth.

The book explains the psychology of raising children as it relates to their well being.
Laura
Jan 16, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Fantastic. This is one l’ll definitely want to reread a couple of times and give to new parents.
Hafez
Oct 28, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This book was not only very helpful for parental secure connection but also gave me an insight of how my character has formed.
Beth
Jun 05, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I wish everyone had access to the information in this book. Rock solid in parenting support and attachment theory.
Alice Mcalexander
Mar 10, 2018 rated it really liked it
I’d probably do a 4.5. I already knew a lot about attachment but I found this helped me reflect on issues I would have without realizing
Jaime Gray
May 22, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This was a great book! Useful info to the very last page.
Sarah
Apr 06, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Must read for parents!
Sara
Jul 30, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: nonfiction
3.5 stars, good info, but repetitive, and writing was not easy to get through or particularly interesting. Good content overall, but they probably needed a writer/ghostwriter/editor.
Erica
Dec 06, 2017 rated it liked it
The most boring and soporific parenting book I've read-although I do like many of the ideas. Great ideas that are hard to grasp because it makes you sooooo sleepy...
Joana
Sep 11, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Fantastic. Highly recommended even for those who do not have kids!
GM
Dec 26, 2018 marked it as blinkist
The key message in these blinks:
A secure child is one who feels safe and comfortable in being emotionally honest about expressing their needs to their caregiver. Likewise, a caregiver who can encourage this emotional honesty is one who can balance the healthy encouragement in their child’s self-reliance with the tenderness needed to comfort them. Some caregivers have aversions to these needs because of their own childhoods, but this can be overcome by acknowledging this and consciously acting ag
...more
Juliana
Great resource for parents
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