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An achingly funny story from the author of the bestselling You Had Me at Hello
When Edie is caught in a compromising position at her colleagues’ wedding, all the blame falls on her – turns out that personal popularity in the office is not that different from your schooldays. Shamed online and ostracised by everyone she knows, Edie’s forced to take an extended sabbatical – ghostwriting an autobiography for hot new acting talent, Elliot Owen. Easy, right?
Wrong. Banished back to her home town of Nottingham, Edie is not only dealing with a man who probably hasn’t heard the word ‘no’ in a decade, but also suffering an excruciating regression to her teenage years as she moves back in with her widowed father and judgy, layabout sister.
When the world is asking who you are, it’s hard not to question yourself. Who’s that girl? Edie is ready to find out.
544 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 19, 2015
"Can I see you tomorrow? Can I see you constantly? Can I see you with no clothes on again?
"You're young and beautiful, why not have a go at this boy while you're at it? Might liven him up. Or is he a homosexual? Sadly true of so many of the exquisite ones."
"Oh I didn't, is it your birthday? How marvellously timed, then. Which one is it?"
"Thirty-six," Edie said, reluctantly.
"Don't tell me the truth. Don't tell anyone the truth. You can pass for twenty-eight on a cloudy day, I'd say. Stick there until you're forced to go to thirty-four."
"Don't waste the young and beautiful years being anxious, darling. There's plenty of old and ugly ones coming."
"Friends, I won't lie, it is weird sometimes. It makes you appreciate that thing about how you 'can't make new old friends'. Your best mates know you're still you and if you disappeared up your arse they'd let you know. You just have to still be able to hear it. New friends are trickier. The question of whether they'd still laugh at your jokes if you worked in Greggs is always there, hovering. You need to have good instincts. And you discover there's a strange subcategory—your in this category, although it's mainly male..."
Edit sat up straighter: "What? How?"
"People who pre-dislike you because they're so sure they're going to dislike you, they may as well get it over with. Frustratingly, they're often the smart people you'd quite like to like you."
"Say that we 'wanted different things'. She wanted to carry on being a petulant wazzock and I wanted to fire her into the heart of the sun. Also put 'she's a free spirit, I don't think anyone will ever be able to tie her down' as a euphemism for about as a faithful as a bonobo monkey."