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My Mad Fat Diary: A Memoir

(Rae Earl #1)

Rae Earl

3.72 · Rating details · 3,711 ratings · 427 reviews

It's 1989 and Rae Earl is a fat, boy-mad 17-year-old girl, living in Stamford, Lincolnshire with her mum and their deaf white cat in a council house with a mint green bathroom and a refrigerator Rae can't keep away from. She’s also just been released from a psychiatric ward. My Mad Fat Diary is the hilarious, harrowing and touching real-life diary Rae kept during that fate ...more

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Paperback, 368 pages

Published April 19th 2016 by St. Martin's Griffin (first published 2007)

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Feb 19, 2013 Eszter rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: ya

This book was bit of a let down, really. I just finished the BBC series based on this book and it is brilliant and makes me cry and makes me laugh and I'm in love with all the characters and their realtionships, but the book was just...not enough. I am aware that these are Rae Earl's original diary entries only edited a bit, so I didn't a expect a story with an exceptional plot and no loose ends, but still, the abrupt ending was I bit weird.

Earl's style is enjoyable and I found myself amused oft ...more

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Feb 22, 2013 Reijilie Wynne rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: favorites

You need to go into this book separating it from the TV show. The show is sheer brilliance and the people reading this book because of it clearly agree or you wouldn't be making the effort. The book is the diary of a teenage girl - a 17 yo girl at that. We're all the centres of our own universe at that age.

In saying that, it was a particularly interesting read. Especially from the POV of someone so constantly bullied & harassed that she expected it, and made comments like "only one person had a ...more

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Mar 26, 2016 Lynx rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: edelweiss-netgalley, biography-memoir

Rae Earl’s diary shows how universal teenage issues (and beyond) really are. You don’t need to grow up overweight to relate to her struggles. Everyone experiences self esteem issues, family problems, and the desire to be accepted. As it is with most personal diaries, Rae never holds back and pours out pure raw emotion and truth in every entry. This could easily be a very depressing book but it isn’t. Earl manages even in the darkest moments to maintain her hope and humour, allowing you to share ...more

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Jun 19, 2016 Mel rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: 3-stars, read-in-2016

Quick review as this book took so much energy from me.

To start: I'm a fat girl. So is the girl writing this diary. I related so well to everything she is going through. Like her problems are ALREADY relatable but being the same size as her makes it so I relate extremely well. Almost too well. Which brings me to my first problem.
She spends the ENTIRE 346 pages hating everything about herself and all I felt the entire time reading it is that I should also hate myself. I should hate the way I look ...more

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Mar 12, 2013 Anna rated it really liked it · review of another edition

From my blog, The Writer Diaries.

Channel 4 has recently made a series based on this book – or shall I say, diary. It’s funny and brilliant and while the acting is not the best as Sherlock or Doctor Who, it’s real and raw. I watched the show and fell in love with it, and knew I had to read the diary it’s based off of.

First, I just have to say – take this at face value. There’s no huge plot line, and it’s not written as a story like Perks of being a Wallflower. It’s real. It’s an actual diary, so ...more

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Mar 25, 2016 Esil rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: netgalley

3 ½ stars. When I first started reading My Mad Fat Diary I thought I should stop. This is not a book for me. I’m not the intended audience. I really should just pass this on to my 14 year old daughter. But for some reason I just kept reading it to the end – laughing a bit, cringing a lot, and feeling somewhat sad and frustrated. My Mad Fat Diary is the obviously quite edited 1989 diary of Rae Earl. Earl was 17 years old in 1989. She was overweight, had just spent some time in a psychiatric hospi ...more

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May 21, 2015 SARA rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: 5-star-reads

Sabes ese momento en el cual lees no un libro cualquiera, sino EL libro. TU libro. Así me he sentido leyendo My Mad, Fat Diary. Simplemente no tengo palabras para describir todo lo identificada que me he sentido.

“No one is what you expect behind closed doors. And some brilliant people are eaten up by some terrible things.”

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Apr 19, 2013 Beckyleigh rated it it was ok · review of another edition

I started reading this with high expectations. I haven't watched the tv series, but I normally love diary style books because they're usually full of humour and they're light reads for me. There will be spoilers in this review.

A light read it certainly was, but I felt that the book was plotless and repetitive. I do realise that it's Rae's actual diary, and I admire her for having the courage to put it out there!

It started off well, but then it just went slowly downhill. The same things seemed t ...more

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Apr 09, 2018 Holly rated it liked it · review of another edition

3/5 stars! i think watching the tv show first made me feel like this book was very anti-climatic.
it wasnt bad, just not what i was expecting! The writing was good and funny for a 16 year olds diary!
Honestly i think i will just rewatch the show instead of reading the sequel! Thank you Rae Earl for this funny diary!

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Mar 06, 2013 Nicola Mcfall rated it really liked it · review of another edition

I decided to read this book because I had watched and enjoyed the recent Channel 4 series. I quickly realised though that the book is quite different from the series and initially felt a little bit disappointed. The appeal of the series for me was mainly that it was set in the late 90's when I too was a teenager. It brought back so many memories. The book however is set in 1989, when I was only 4. As I read on though and dropped my expectations I started to really enjoy it. It's completely 100% ...more

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Jul 25, 2020 Amy Layton rated it it was amazing

Shelves: memoirs, fat-protagonist

I never watched the series, so when I saw that it was originally a memoir...y'all know I jumped on it. Rae Earl is utterly hilarious, among poignant, unabashed, and a truly wonderful writer. As she catalogs one of her high school years, she shares with us all the taunts, gossip, and mayhem that surrounds her in both her private life and public life. She attends secret raves, cheers failed diets, and gets utterly pissed at the pubs.

And what a high school year it is! Though our experiences of it a ...more

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Sep 05, 2020 Mellisa rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

This is my second time reading this book and I love it more each time. It's so real and there's a part in the book for every person to relate to.

It kinda makes me sad for Rae and how things must have been back then, for people to laugh at her weight and use it as a joke like it means nothing. Even though she laughed along they still shouldn't have used her as a joke as much as they did.

The ending made me feel so frustrated for her and so sad - she genuinely thought that was good of him to say if ...more

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Apr 24, 2016 Peach rated it it was ok

Shelves: 2016-releases, grow-up-pls, from-publisher, nonfiction-memoir, haha-not-funny, the-shame-game

"(...) His girlfriend is lovely.
WHY AM I FAT?"

Yes, Teen Rae. Why are you fat? But you know, that question is irrelevant. That's like asking someone why the sky is blue. Answerless.

The year is 1989. Rachel "Rae" Earl has recently gotten out of the psychiatric ward. She was there, due to an undisclosed nervous breakdown and was forced to lie to get herself out. Rae overeats to find solace, goes to the pub with her best friend, Bethany, and is relatively boy-crazy.

Fans of Scarlett Epstein Hates It Here and Dumplin' will adore this. As I was not a fan of either, I did not. Rae isn't funny, she's cruel. The preface is a grand ode to fatshaming. I'm gonna assume current Rae is thin. Or, at least, thinner than she was in '89. The preface stats: "Oh, fat girls were a rare sight in England, especially in the '80s, and I was one of them." Um, okay. And??? Do you expect a pat on the back?

Also: general shaming. She hears a classmate purging in the bathroom stall and makes a horrible comment. Her only friend, Bethany, is constantly demeaned by her. I didn't sympathize with Rae. I sympathized with her mother for having to deal with her. Rae also releases a cage of her mother's "budgies" (parakeets) because she hates the idea of caged birds.

"Bethany is going out with Battered Sausage. She told me tonight. I was due to be staying at hers and it was too late to go home. She has been a total, total cow. She is now covered in yoghurt because she says it helps with her spots. You'll need to raid the European dairy mountain with your zits, bitch."

She only lists the terrible moments of her life. (i.e. "I ate a cake in front of a mirror and Mum called me vain.", "A group of boys catcalled and called me names from across the street.", "A little girl pointed to me and asked her Mum why I was fat.") And she's constantly berating herself. In all-caps, too. At the time of writing this, Rae is eighteen but her diary feels written by a twelve-year old. There's an excessive usage of exclamation points and capslock. Literally, my brain can't take it.

Rae's dialogue is intolerable. Unfunny. This book did nothing to me, which is sad. I sympathized with her briefly, but all she ever did was go to the pub, trash-talk everyone else, and complain about life itself. This book is moving to HULU. Yay for Rae, I guess. ...more

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Mar 05, 2013 Vicky rated it it was ok · review of another edition

Unlike many others, I haven't actually watched My Mad Fat Diary. It was something that I was really interested in watching as it has themes of Mental Illness which I'm interested in and is very stigmatised in society. So I thought I'd give the book a go before I catch up on the series.

First of all, I would say that I enjoyed the writing of the book (composed in journal entries). It was a very relevant and realistic teenage voice, that was relate able and sometimes hilarious. Unfortunately, this ...more

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Aug 26, 2016 Tricia. rated it really liked it · review of another edition

I NEED MORE...

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Apr 20, 2016 Christine rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: netgalley, 2016-reads

Most people would be mortified if someone read their diary – especially their teenage years diary.

Rae Earl has published hers.

Granted, at one point in her life she wanted to burn it on the barbecue and they are now 25+ years old, but some of the issues are still relevant today. Give this book to teenagers and hope it becomes a jumping point for some important conversation.

When Ms. Earl began writing in her diary she was 17 years old, attending a private secondary school on a “scholarship scheme” Most people would be mortified if someone read their diary – especially their teenage years diary.

Rae Earl has published hers.

Granted, at one point in her life she wanted to burn it on the barbecue and they are now 25+ years old, but some of the issues are still relevant today. Give this book to teenagers and hope it becomes a jumping point for some important conversation.

When Ms. Earl began writing in her diary she was 17 years old, attending a private secondary school on a “scholarship scheme” tuition grant and recently released from a psychiatric ward. Even she admits that some of the aspects of her life would make people call “bullsh**” but with the exception of some editing (to protect the innocent) this is her diary.

Rae had three pretty basic goals as a teenager; complete her A-levels, lose weight and find someone who would love her (translate that into “lose her virginity”), not necessarily in that order. The two strongest desires were to lose weight and stop being a “cow” and to acquire a boyfriend. Even Rae admitted that neither of these was likely to happen. In Rae’s own words “Frankly, to use late 1980’s terminology, I was gagging for it. Like most teenagers, I was desperate to lose my virginity. However, I already had a lover that made me look pregnant but actually ensured that I would never, ever become a teenage pregnancy statistic; Food.”

In many ways this was a difficult book to read. Obvious from her “forward” in the book, Ms. Earl has a sense of humor now and after reading “My Mad Fat Diary” it’s also clear she had one then … some of the things she writes are very funny. However, overall I found the diary very sad, what might be typical teenage issues made worse by budding OCD and obvious issues with food that were often difficult to read about. As each page turned I also had a growing concern about the monumental consumption of alcohol that seemed very commonplace amongst her group of friends. Even her “Mum” did not have issues with her heading out to the pub every night. (I did!) I also wish teenaged Rae had been able to step outside herself long enough to give “Ryan, the RAF groper” a second look. I hate to make the comparison, but My Mad Fat Diary could be described as a non-fiction “Duff”.

As I am formulating this review I find it difficult to type the words “I enjoyed this book” because it seems wrong. I am glad I read it and I understand that the next year of her journal has also been published as “My Madder Fatter Diary”. I came to care enough about Rae and her friends to want to pick it up.

This book was originally published in 2007 and I was unaware that in 2013 became a hit television series starring Sharon Rooney. As I reached the halfway point in the book I kept thinking that it should be made into a movie.

I received a copy of this book at no charge from the publisher, St. Martin’s Griffin, via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
...more

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Jan 29, 2015 Aitziber rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Recommends it for: fans of the TV show, misfits, parents

Shelves: language-english, ebook

I read Orange Is the New Black in 2013, and because of that book, I figured that My Fat, Mad Teenage Diary would bear only a vague resemblance to the TV show. After all, the diary is based on the experiences of Rae Earl, who has at least one brother, in the late 80s. The TV show, on the other hand, is about single child Rae Earl in 1996.

To my surprise, a lot of situations, anecdotes, characters and even dialogue were, if not exactly the same, then obviously based on Earl's real experiences.

Tee I read Orange Is the New Black in 2013, and because of that book, I figured that My Fat, Mad Teenage Diary would bear only a vague resemblance to the TV show. After all, the diary is based on the experiences of Rae Earl, who has at least one brother, in the late 80s. The TV show, on the other hand, is about single child Rae Earl in 1996.

To my surprise, a lot of situations, anecdotes, characters and even dialogue were, if not exactly the same, then obviously based on Earl's real experiences.

Teenage Rae is hardly a seasoned writer, nor particularly sensitive to the plight of others. Indeed, she often comments on the beauty of other women, only to follow it up with, "I'm not a lesbian!!!" While it would've been easy for adult Rae Earl to edit those out, and it's definitely not a pretty sight, it rings true to life. It's not rare for straight teenage girls who perceive themselves as wholly unappealing to ment, to turn it on their head and begin wondering if maybe there's something about them that advertises that they're not into dudes.

Combine that with the societal male gaze, that shows women in such a plain sexual way that other women learn to perceive them (and themselves) as sexual things, but leads guys to think it's gay to look at other men in a casually sexual way, and you soon have teenage girls like Rae Earl. But it's hard to understand all that when you're 16, it's the late 80s, you live in a small town social justice is not part of anyone's vocabulary, not around you. I wish adult Rae had footnoted those bits. On the other hand, it may feel intrusive, preachy or like an after school special. All in all, this makes the book not something you'll necessarily want to give your teenaged lesbian daughter, however mad or fat they are otherwise.

But I did give it four stars because I think she's a positive role model otherwise. As hard as her experiences were on her, as much as she suffers and hurts herself, physically and emotionally, she will often ask why people don't let her be happy and love her just the way she is. It makes the case that you can be "a blob with a gob," and have good friends, and have guys like you, guys who are not total creeps. Sure, those guys are ultimately too insecure themselves to date her, but it's progress! ...more

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Apr 01, 2016 Donna rated it liked it

Shelves: contemporary, non-fiction, young-adult

When St Martin’s pitched me MY MAD FAT DIARY I was sort of on the line about it. It’s not something that’s in my normal wheelhouse but if it’s pithy and funny and quirky, I can usually appreciate it. So I accepted and now . . . I’m not too sure how to review it. I definitely didn’t like it like I thought I would and now I’m kind of stuck. It’s a real diary written by a seventeen-year-old. What am I going to comment on? The writing? The realism? The authenticity? I don’t even know.

It reads like a When St Martin’s pitched me MY MAD FAT DIARY I was sort of on the line about it. It’s not something that’s in my normal wheelhouse but if it’s pithy and funny and quirky, I can usually appreciate it. So I accepted and now . . . I’m not too sure how to review it. I definitely didn’t like it like I thought I would and now I’m kind of stuck. It’s a real diary written by a seventeen-year-old. What am I going to comment on? The writing? The realism? The authenticity? I don’t even know.

It reads like a diary written by a seventeen-year-old. I do think Rae was more astute and quick-witted than your average teenager but I didn’t read anything earth-shattering. I wasn’t rolling on the ground laughing. I may have chuckled a time or two and smiled a little but that’s about it. She absolutely had her irrational teenage moments and she also had some pretty insightful moments as well. Her mother is less a mother and more a domineering roommate but she does have her solid mom moments.

I thought the most intriguing part of this book was Rae interactions with Bethany. I’ve been in Rae’s shoes and been around people kind of like Bethany so I could definitely relate to that level of insecurity in a person and having them really project it onto you. But I found myself liking these interactions the most. They ended up being telling of both people involved, I think.

I didn’t like the end. At all. Throughout the diary Rae waffled between wanting to lose weight so boys would like her and wanting to find a boy who liked her for who she was. I personally thought she trended more toward the latter more often than not. So when the ending came and the boy she was mega-crushing on basically says if you weren’t fat we’d totally be together, and she gets all swoony, I’m like WTF? This type of thing irritated her to no end throughout the book but have the same words come out of the mouth of the boy she’s mooning over and somehow he has a point? I really didn’t like that.

So . . . I didn’t connect with it like I wanted to. For the most part it was an engaging-enough read but ultimately not for me.

3

I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. ...more

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Apr 23, 2016 Jen Ryland added it · review of another edition

I'm not a huge fan of the diary format, but I've had good luck with British diaries-as-books. Remember The Adrian Mole Diaries? I read those years ago. And of course, there's always Bridget Jones's Diary.

My Mad Fat Diary was entertaining and touching. It's the story of Rae Earl, a teenage girl who's just been released from a stint in a psychiatric hospital and is trying to sort out her life. She's desperate to lose weight, and desperate to have a boyfriend, and isn't having a ton of luck with ei ...more

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Mar 26, 2014 Naoms rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: read-in-2014, ya-fiction, favorites, memoirs-nonfiction-autobiographies, humor, women-s-lit

Literally just a year in a life if a girl. It doesn't have a traditional story arc, but is funny, entertaining and at times heart-wrenching.

Really glad I decided to read it.

Review to come! ...more

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May 26, 2017 anto rated it it was ok · review of another edition

i had high expections about this book since i loved the tvshow so much, but this story was the same from the start to the end. THE SAME LAME STORY about rae who wants to loose weight but she doesn't do anything for that. i know she have problems, and that this is a real diary but, dear god.. we really needed this story to be published? ...more

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Jun 10, 2020 Devon Munn rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: non-fiction, memoirs

It was ok. I would say don't expect there to be a overarching story cause basically it's a non fiction book compiled off the authors diary over a year in her life (in this case when she was 17 going on 18 in 1989). I read this so i can watch the TV show adaptation so i will say this isn't a horrendous book to read if you want to familiarize yourself with this before you watch the show ...more

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Nov 09, 2017 Dalene rated it it was ok · review of another edition

At times I related to the main character and then other times I really hated her. I really wished I liked this book more, since the description sounds amazing.

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Apr 25, 2020 Raiqua ☾ rated it really liked it · review of another edition

↠ 4.25 stars.

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Jun 24, 2020 Laura Stevens rated it did not like it · review of another edition

TV how was far better

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Aug 01, 2013 Jessica rated it it was amazing · review of another edition

Shelves: my-library

I’m not sure where to begin with this. Do I talk about the show first or the book first? If you don’t already know, I’m obsessed with the E4 show My Mad Fat Diary. Obsessed! I’m about to re-watch season 1 again for the fourth time since April. You need to watch it. I went into reading this book not having really high expectations since I heard that it wasn’t as good as the show but I think it’s important to remember that with anything that goes from book to the big screen there are going to be d I’m not sure where to begin with this. Do I talk about the show first or the book first? If you don’t already know, I’m obsessed with the E4 show My Mad Fat Diary. Obsessed! I’m about to re-watch season 1 again for the fourth time since April. You need to watch it. I went into reading this book not having really high expectations since I heard that it wasn’t as good as the show but I think it’s important to remember that with anything that goes from book to the big screen there are going to be differences. I’ve always been a really big fan of book diaries and I would read them all the time while growing up so I was excited to read this. It was kind of weird reading this one though since this is actually Rae Earl’s diary. Like this is her actual diary. God bless the woman for having the courage to publish it. While I was reading it I did get the feeling that she did leave some things out of the book and I’m think she did that for the sake of the people she knows because she didn’t want to air their dirty laundry. Overall it was fun to see what Rae Earl’s life was really like when she was 17. I think it’s a fun read for anyone who has been boy obsessed, overweight, or has self-harmed or has been in a mental institution. It’s just really nice to know you’re not alone with those thoughts and that some has been where you’ve been and has survived.

Now on to the show vs the book. I was so surprised that the things you see on the show have actually happened to Rae. Like the whole being stuck on the slide at the pool party. Totally happened. I’m still suffering from secondhand embarrassment from that scene. Rae’s mom marrying Karim a man 20 years who junior or is a Moroccan pro-wrestler or something. Totally happened… except he wasn’t in the trunk of her car. That’d be weird. The character’s that you see on the show are in the book as well. Haddock is the ever so lovely Finn. You should have seen me swooning while reading about Haddock/Finn. Finn is different in the show and that makes me happy (you’ll see why if you read the book) but I loved that it kind of gave you some extra background on to what Finn/Haddock is like. The show made Chop a lot funnier and less aggressive then Battered Sausage. I actually think Chop is a combo of Fig and Battered Sausage. Chloe. If you follow my personal blog you’ll know that absolutely loathe Chloe. Bethany, the real life Chloe, is a thousand times worse. I kid you not. I wanted to punch her in the face. The worse thing is that I have a friend whose done the same crap that Bethany pulls. As far as the rest of the characters, there is an Izzy, Tix and Archie but they are like a combo of different people.

I really liked the book but like everyone else I think I prefer the show more. Book Rae is more…selfish in away but she is 17 after all. The show of version of Rae, while she can be selfish, is a lot more stronger. I think I identify more with the show Rae than I do with the book Rae. I love that the show is hilarious and extremely sad at the same time. I love that the show deals more with mental illness and self esteem issues and that we can see Rae grow and process everything around her. With a diary you don’t really see that progress. I think it’s really important for people to see that it can get better and that there is light at the end of the tunnel. The show is just flawless okay.

I wouldn’t say this book is for everyone (the show is. Go watch it) you’d have to like the style that the book is written in and I think it’s better to go in knowing what the story is about. Overall I enjoyed the book and will most likely pick up the next one. ...more

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Nov 22, 2012 Georgie rated it really liked it · review of another edition

I have read this book twice over, and still, I can't bring myself to nudge the star rating up one. The whole book just gave off the air of hit and miss, don't get me wrong I loved the book, but there was just something that wasn't quite... well, let me put it this way: it was like watching a 'hefty' ballerina giving it her all dancing around an empty stage, it was cringey to watch.

But despite this, I fell in love with this teenage Rea Earl and honestly felt like when read through the various ent ...more

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Sep 13, 2015 Natasha rated it liked it

Shelves: 2016

I admire Rae Earl, but her story is one that is better dramatized. I'm a big fan of the MMFD TV series; it is a powerful voice for overweight youths who are struggling to accept themselves. This original memoir is good, but it lacks punch.

I kept thinking that MMFD was a YA novel, not a memoir. It certainly reads like a YA novel, yet with considerably less plot and detail. It is composed of a year of Rae's journal entries--which are simultaneously hilarious and full of self loathing--and as much ...more

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Mar 10, 2018 Carrie-Anne rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: non-fiction, contemporary, series

This book is SO RELATABLE. Almost every situation Rae talked about, I've been in.

Fat friend - check
Poor friend - check
Funny friend - check
Crush dating your friend - check
Being loved 'like a sister' - check

Even the non-teenage-fat-girl-problems like (view spoiler) at the same time of the year and at the same age. It's crazy!

The only thing I haven't personally had to deal with is the mental health side of things. Slowly through out the book Rae opens up mor ...more

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Mar 31, 2014 Aneirys rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: need-to-have-a-physical-copy

I'm surprise I likde this book. Maybe it was because I understood her so much.I know what is like to have difficult friends and to be the only one without a boyfriend. Unfortunately or Fortunately (don't know which oneis more appropiate) if I had a diary on my teenage years it would be something like this.

description

I like it shows the sincerity of a girl whith depression in the rawest form, without caramelizing any details. And it also shows how a book can end without love but with really sincere, cool fr ...more

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About Rae Earl

Rae Earl

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I come from Stamford in Lincolnshire. It’s where a lot of TV and films are shot because it hasn’t changed much in 500 years. My childhood was like most people’s – a mixture of lovely and very odd. Lovely because I spent a lot of time with good friends, music and tadpoles. Odd because I spent a lot of time worrying about everything – like war, murderers and poisonous mushrooms (don’t ask). I was a ...more

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“I wish I was Rapunzel
Letting down her hair
But at the bottom of my tower
There's nobody stood there.

No prince to carry me off to the sunset...
The reason why of course,
I don't look like his princess,
I look like his horse.” — 48 likes

“I just don't get men. Mind you, I don't get me either.” — 33 likes

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Preview — My Mad Fat Diary by Rae Earl

My Mad Fat Diary: A Memoir

(Rae Earl #1)

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