Watch Your Junk and Other Advice for Expectant Fathers

Dumb White Husband

by Benjamin Wallace

Children are amazing. Their limitless capacity for love is matched only by their ability to make you feel like an idiot. Don't worry. You're not alone. Watch Your Junk and Other Advice for Expectant Fathers tackles the subjects that other baby books ignore: - Why you shouldn't touch the wand in the sonogram room - The exact moment your opinion no longer counts - How people will respond to the news - How TV and baby classes have lied to us - Which poop jokes to expect in the delivery room - Converting diapers into usable guilt - How to assure your child says your name first And much, much more There's even a twin version in case you're so much a man that you knocked up your wife twice at the same time. Don't go into fatherhood unprepared, read Watch Your Junk and Other Advice for Expectant Fathers today and know what to expect before it's too late.

Genres: Humor

162 pages, Paperback

First published September 10, 2012

About the author

Benjamin Wallace lives in Dallas, Texas where he complains about the heat—a lot.

Reviews

[Benjamin Wallace]

Yeah I wrote it. But I had to reread it. So that counts.

[Montzalee Wittmann]

Watch Your Junk and Other Advice for Expectant Fathers by Benjamin Wallace is a hilarious book that kept me giggling through out the book! So many true things that he twists around to word it so that I had to laugh, giggle, or snicker on every page. I needed this book! Great job! As a woman, I wondered what he would say and it really didn't diss women, much, but is was hilarious! Funny as heck! It was free too, so I was double happy!

[Kim]

Smiles

Made me remember my children's infant and toddler days..I wish someone would have explained the experience to me as it was explained in this book !

[Joe Aymor]

Hilariously Entertaining and Insightful

From the genius who brought you Dumb White Husband, Damien Stockwell, and Post-Apocalyptic Nomadic Warrior, comes the REAL version of what a man should expect when entering into parenthood. Full of sound advice and plenty of laughs, this is sure to please anyone. Take it from me, I'm an uncle of 2 boys and I don't plan to have children, but I loved every single part of this read. I've even witnessed or heard many of these instances happening to my brother. So whether you are looking for a quick read, a good laugh, a new coffee-table book, great gift, or just some helpful insight, definitely pick this up! I'm debating on stocking up on numerous copies of this to hand out along with tons of tiny screwdrivers to expectant fathers. Happy reading you son of a monkey!

[Stephanie]

I bought this for my husband shortly after we found out we are expecting. He enjoys reading, but he couldn't stop laughing his way through this book. Once he finished, he highly recommended that I read it too. There were sections of this book that made me laugh out loud. The author seems honest, genuine, and funny. While I am not sure there is still plenty more for us to learn, this was a great start!

[David Blaylock]

Glad that all of this is in my rear view mirror.

[Rich]

Would recommend...

It's a fun read with some insightful perspective. Even seasoned dads can benefit from reading this book. Good luck dads to be.

[Christopher Fowers]

This is funny. I mean funny. If only there was more helpful content. Oh well... Worth the read if for the laughs alone.

[Jim Kaiser]

Author thinks he's way to funny. He's funny at first but becomes annoying very quickly. Not a good book for a nervous father to be. It actually made me more nervous.

[William Neri]

Entertaining, funny and a quick read.