"Do you think my life's ambition is to bring ruin and unhappiness to anyone whose name is Kent?" Daniel Conrad was frustrated by Donna Kent's refusal to acknowledge the attraction between them.
But six years ago the Conrads had cut off supplies to her father's near-bankrupt company. Donna had never accepted her father's subsequent car crash, had never escaped the feeling that he'd had nothing left to live for--and Daniel brought back all the pain.
She didn't want to enjoy his company, his laughter and teasing, didn't want to think that her future belonged with him.
Successful caterer heroine runs into widower hero at a party, a man from her past who she hates because she believes he is responsible for hounding her father to death. Years ago when the heroine was a young girl, her mom died after a long illness and her dad was distraught and let his business flounder. He was in bankruptcy proceedings, and owed a lot of money to creditors, the biggest ones being the hero and his father, who took him to court over it. Heroine believes the stress brought on by his creditors led her dad to crash his car and die, leaving the heroine an orphan. To add insult to injury, the hero showed up at heroine's house not too long after her father's funeral and, like a vulture, asked if she would sell him her family home because his wife liked it. Naturally, the heroine slammed the door in his face.
It took years for the heroine to single-handedly build up her life again, with great difficulty. She became a successful caterer but she never recovered from the emotional blows of losing her parents and their entire savings and lifestyle so quickly. When she bumps into the now widowed hero at her client's party, she is understandably very hostile to him.
Hero, on the other hand, seems unbothered by their fraught past and pursues heroine relentlessly. Despite her protests, he manages to insert himself into her life and eventually succeeds in slowly gaining her trust. Little by little, heroine falls into a friendship, then in love with the hero. She starts to enjoy life rather than merely existing as a workaholic. She even finally believes him when he tells her he was not responsible for her father's death and wished him no ill will, just needed all the hefty loans her father had taken out to be paid back or else hero and his father would have lost their own business.
Then, when hero thinks he's got heroine nice and wrapped around his little finger, he drops this bomb: Heroine's father used to have an affair with hero's stepmother. The affair started when heroine's mom became terminally ill, and it continued after her death. Everyone in town knew of the affair including hero and hero’s dad. Only heroine, who was a young girl, was left in the dark, and supposedly heroine's mom didn’t know about it either but really, how can they be sure? Maybe, as she was lying in agony on her death bed and dying a little bit more every day, she realized what her husband was up to but was too weak and despondent to do anything about it. This puts a whole new spin why the hero and his father were the biggest proponents of pushing for legal action against heroine’s dad. It now seems it was more of a personal vendetta than a business dispute, the cuckolded husband going after the man who was having an affair with his wife!
Heroine had no idea of the affair. She thought her parents had a perfect marriage. She tortured herself for years with the suspicion that her dad crashed his car deliberately because he was too distraught over his wife's death and he did not love his daughter enough to fight the bankruptcy and go on with life, instead he took the easy way out. But in fact, her dad had no such suicidal thoughts and was on his way to see his mistress when he had his accident.
To add insult to injury, after his death, the hero's stepmom blithely reconciled with her husband and stepkids. Her husband and stepkids still worship her and are incredibly protective of her, and don't blame her at all for her affair, they are just so grateful she came back into the fold. Hero is full of excuses and justifications to exonerate his stepmom's role in this sleazefest. He even has the gall to suggest that the heroine speak with his stepmother in order to hash it all out. Really, how insensitive!
The heroine eventually agrees to have her meeting with the hero's stepmom. I found that scene between them very cringeworthy, full of convenient explanations that were close to gaslighting of the heroine by the stepmom. No matter the excuses (and they were poor ones at that), these nasty toads, hero, his dad, the stepmom, and heroine's dad, all covered up a sleazy, adulterous affair to save THEMSELVES from scandal and embarrassment, not to "protect" the heroine from further hurt.
Now heroine is marrying into that family and having to make "merry" every year at Christmas with her mother-in-law who was her dad's mistress and probably caused her real mom a world of hurt when she was terminally ill on her death bed. Her father-in-law and husband instituted bankruptcy proceedings against her dad then swooped up to pick up his shattered dreams, helped to cover up the affair for years, and went on to live a happy life while heroine was torturing herself emotionally, physically and financially to survive her living nightmare. Excuse me while I go throw up.
Three stars only because of the compelling story-telling and a nicely written heroine who had all my sympathy.
RE Roses, Always Roses - This one is interesting but has to really go into the just-visiting-HPlandia type of HP. The characters really don't belong there. CJ brings us another emotionally sterile h that has to face severe personal trauma to recover her joy in life and find true love.
CJ does the psychological character evolution, but unlike Charlotte Lamb, (who loves the analytical approach,) CJ shows the character development not through the internal musings of POV, but via the character's actions.
In fact CJ rarely lets the reader in on the whole of the character's thought processes, part of the fun in her books is deciphering what subconscious decisions an h or H is coming to based on what they specifically do, even when those actions are completely contrary to their verbally stated plans.
This process gives a bigger depth to CJ's stories than most offerings in HPLandia, while I may not agree with the conclusions or the basis for the decisions the h or H makes during the story, it usually is more than enough to convince me the HEA is a real one.
RAR is no exception to the CJ back list, this is an angst filled tale about a woman who has to find balance in her life and put the past to rest in order to move on to a better life with love.
The story starts with the h being 24 and a very successful caterer, at 18 her father died in a car accident and since he had been forced into bankruptcy by his creditors after the death of her mum some time earlier, the h is convinced he committed suicide.
The effects of paternal suicide are never discussed in any type of analytical detail in this story, in fact they are never talked about at all. CJ shows how the h reacts instead and it is a surprisingly effective way to convey the trauma of such an event.
Early on the h flashes back to being 18 and finding out her dad is dead. Her father's accountant explains that her father died bankrupt and the only asset she has is the family home. She is furious when she finds out that the bankruptcy was forced by her father's main creditor, people that her parents and her father had socialized with and treated as friends. She feels that they drove her father to kill himself and in a rage of grief and fury, she takes off to their corporate offices to give them a piece of her mind.
The CEO of the company and her dad's friend is out of the office and in hospital, so the h winds up yelling at the next in charge, which is the H - he is 25 and soon to be married and he tries to talk her out of her temper but she is not having any of it. She lays into him big time and then takes off.
When he shows up at her house the next day, wanting to explain the situation and buy her family home, she warns him off, refuses to listen to him and when he starts being obstinate, she calls the police. The H leaves, realizing that she is no state to listen to him and he has a wedding to plan and work to do anyway.
The h is also aware that there is a lot of gossip going around about her dad, and this confirms her suicide theory. She has been at cooking college and people aren't repeating the gossip to her, so she just knows that bad things are being said, people are snubbing her and she is fiercely resentful and very hurt.
She finishes college and takes over a patisserie with the goal of establishing a big catering business. Seven years on she is becoming more successful and looking for ways to expand her business. She has rented out her family home, as her business is based nearer to London, but plans to return in triumph one day, after she has finally "made it" .
She is catering a big party for one of her best clients when she runs into the H again. She is overwhelmed with anger and when he tries to talk to her later and won't leave her alone, she winds up slapping him to get away from him. He then shows up the next day at her house, forces his way inside and drags her out to lunch. She reluctantly listens to him and since she has a lot more business experience now than she did at 18, can almost understand why the H's company forced the bankruptcy.
She still doesn't want to be around the H, but he keeps forcing her to go out with him, literally carrying her off to lunch when she refuses to leave her business premises with him. We find out that the H has been a widower for four years, his wife died of leukemia two years after they married and the H is eternally grateful to his stepmother who really supported him during that time. The H has also bought a company of his own and left his father's, as they have very different management styles.
Gradually over a period of months, the H courts the h. She helps him decorate a new home with all new things and he finally tells her he loves her and wants to marry her. The h is not pleased to hear this, she doesn't love him (or so she tells herself,) and she is a workaholic with big plans, she just doesn't have time for a relationship.
The outings with the H once or twice a week for the last few months are the only time she has taken off over the past seven years. She tells him to go and leave her alone, he isn't happy about it but he goes and the h proceeds to try and work him out of her system.
She doesn't succeed, after pumping his friends for information and getting nowhere, she breaks down and calls the H. They go back to chastely dating and then the H demands she admit that she loves him. She gets a bad case of the flu instead and the H nurses her through it but she refuses to go to his home for his family Christmas, she doesn't want to meet his dad - she still resents his treatment of her father.
The h really is very booked with her business as well, and on Christmas Eve the h gets into a single car accident after catering for two separate parties with limited staff. The h thinks she might have fallen asleep at the wheel and the police think she skidded on black ice. Either way, she winds up in hospital and the H is furious when he shows up.
He yells at her for using her business as a way to cover the pain of her father's supposed suicide, then he really loses it and tells her that her father did not commit suicide because he was going to meet his mistress - the H's stepmother, who was supposedly going to leave the H's dad for the h's father.
The h is a bit stunned and quite upset, she kicks him out of her hospital room and he asks her to meet his stepmother to talk about it. The h ponders life for bit, knowing that what the H said was true, her father had been cheating on her gravely ill mum for several years with the H's stepmom but very worried that her mother knew about it and was probably devastated. The h realizes her entire childhood has been a lie and that is why the H was pushing so hard for the h to sell her childhood home and move on.
The h needs more time to think and tells the H that she may borrow his vacation home for a little while. The H gives her the keys but doesn't pressure her anymore, he leaves her to sort herself out. The h visits her aunt and uncle on her mum's side, but realizes that they know nothing of her dad's activities. She then decides to meet the stepmother - she really doesn't want to, but she needs some answers.
They meet and it is very awkward, the H's stepmum is a nice lady but she had been sleeping with the H's dad for several years and supposedly the mum never knew. She was going to leave her husband, but then the hubby got very ill and had to go in hospital and on the day the h's father died, she had set up a meeting to tell him that she wouldn't be leaving after all. The step mum insists that the h's dad thought they were going to get married, so he had no reason to kill himself.
The h appears to accept that it really was an accident but she also thinks that some things just have to be lived through and accepted. She can't change the past and the past is what forges her future, so she needs to make some choices about how she feels and what she really wants.
The h is very disillusioned with her father, and it mitigates a lot of the pain she had carried for so many years. It also forces her to re-evaluate her business plans and the stepmother does some subtle manipulation to get the h to choose the H.
The stepmother adds that she is also completely unapologetic about her affair with the h's dad, in fact she is seems quite proud of it. (Which was a bit of a jarring note, but it makes sense a bit later on.) Instead of going to the H's vacation home, the h goes and finds the H. She tells him she loves him and will marry him and will give up her business to be a wife and mother. The H is happy, the h is at peace and happy and it is HEA's everywhere in HPlandia again.
This was a fairly riveting one for me, there is a lot to interpret based on the reactions of the characters and the little asides that CJ throws in as to what really happened with the father and what the h really believes. I have read this several times now and my conclusions are that the h's dad really did commit suicide and the h accepts this even though she says she believes it was an accident.
Though the step mother swears he did not know she was dumping the h's dad, they had been partners for a long time and I think her dad read the situation correctly that she wouldn't leave a seriously ill husband, just like he would not leave his seriously ill wife. His business was bankrupt, he was getting older, his wife was dead, and his daughter was moving on in her life and wouldn't be around much, plus his drinking had become an issue in the weeks before he died.
I think the h recognized that but was at peace with it, she despised him for the pretense of a happy family home when it was anything but, and I think she figured out that her mum knew about the affair, but kept silent out of love for her husband and being unable to meet his physical needs. The h rightly assumes that she was pretty much betrayed by both parents and that she has let their drama negatively affect her life. She does love the H and he is nothing but good to her and she needs to move on.
The drive to succeed where her dad failed is pretty meaningless to her now, she wants to build a real family and a real life with children - free of the lies that she unwittingly lived with. She sells her childhood home as a symbol of letting the past go and she gives up her business to focus on what becomes more important to her. Initially she had planned to marry the H but avoid his family, but she loves him and knows that he really treasures the stepmum for support and wouldn't be able to cope with the situation if the h refused to associate with them.
The h pretty much figures that everyone has suffered enough and seven years is enough time to waste on a bunch of liars. The step mother seems to be fairly nice and the h decides she can tolerate her and the H's dad, her resentment is pretty pointless, and she just wants to be happy. None of this is outright stated in the book though, it is purely interpretation between the lines based on what the h does and how she, the stepmother and the H interact and react to each other.
That reliance on the reader to draw their own conclusions is what gives this book a bit of an extra kick for those who are so inclined. If thought provocation while HPlandiaing is your cuppa tea, then pick up this book and you wont' be disappointed.
BTW - the title comes from the H figuring out that roses are the h's favorite flower-- without her ever stating that. He sends them to her all the time and it becomes a little symbol of how he is always thinking of her and missing her when she not around.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
"Do you think my life's ambition is to bring ruin and unhappiness to anyone whose name is Kent?" Daniel Conrad was frustrated by Donna Kent's refusal to acknowledge the attraction between them.
But six years ago the Conrads had cut off supplies to her father's near-bankrupt company. Donna had never accepted her father's subsequent car crash, had never escaped the feeling that he'd had nothing left to live for--and Daniel brought back all the pain.
She didn't want to enjoy his company, his laughter and teasing, didn't want to think that her future belonged with him.
Strong heroine doesn't want to fall for hero but he makes it hard for her to let be.
Well-written where we see the character through her actions. Author moves plot and story by action and dialogue. We do get his thoughts, not hers so much.
Did not like the lady with whom her father committed adultery being the one to bring h and H together.