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How to Be You: Stop Trying to Be Someone Else and Start Living Your Life

4.20  ·  Rating details ·  202 ratings  ·  43 reviews
This book is about how to finally give up on feeling bad about ourselves and discover the best person we can be.

An interactive experience, How to Be You invites you to make the book your own through activities such as coloring in charts, answering questions about how you do the things you do, and discovering patterns in your lives that may be holding you back. Through
Paperback, 190 pages
Published August 2nd 2016 by TarcherPerigee
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Average rating 4.20  · 
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 ·  202 ratings  ·  43 reviews

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Apr 23, 2017 rated it really liked it
Recommends it for: those wanting to be more 'you' (teens and older)
Recommended to 7jane by: Christine Zibas
This was a neat little book, loose enough to let one make out of it what one wants yet also giving helpful lines as to where to go. The purpose: to understand and accept youself, deal with feelings (from bad to better, not feel so alone, to improve) and find ways to belong. Plus stories, answered question and small activities in each part: perfection, trust, knowing, emotions, punishment & control, haters, of the unknown, feeling good and keeping the knowledge of self found. Plus an appendic ...more
Tyler J [They/He] Gray
I can not express my love for this book! Nor do I have a clue what to say other than wanting to recommend it to absolutely everyone! There is so much love and truth within these pages. Gentle and caring words even as it made me cry, in a good way. Things I needed to hear. That I think everyone could use. Self-care, true deep self-care, is so hard for most people. And yet it's so important.

I took my time with this book because I wanted to sit with what I read, to truly absorb it. The best books
Emma Sea
Aug 23, 2017 rated it really liked it
I really enjoyed reading this as an adult, and I will definitely buy and gift copies to kids and tweens who come into my life. I particularly like the sections on giving yourself space and time and attention to actually experience emotions. Wish I'd had this thirty years ago.
Meg - A Bookish Affair
Jul 31, 2016 rated it it was amazing
"How to be You" is a lovely new book that asks readers to participate in figuring out how they can be more comfortable with who they are and celebrating the idea of just being themselves. This is a fun book that I got a lot of myself. This book would be good for anyone who is looking to find a little bit of happiness!

Our guide throughout the book is Jeffrey March, a person who has really had to figure out how to be himself when the conditions he was surrounded by did not necessarily lend
Aug 24, 2016 rated it it was amazing
My previous experiences with self-help books have been fairly terrible. Each time someone would come to me and put a book in my hand, while uttering the words "This book is going to change your life!", I've found the contents to be overly preachy. They've always had this miasma of insincerity hanging over them. Which is why, odd as it may sound, I decided to accept a copy of How to Be You for review. I wanted to try again, now that I'm a bit older. I wanted to see if there was a book out there ...more
Aug 29, 2019 rated it it was ok
Okay, here's where I'm at.
I wanted so much to love this book. I adore Jeffrey Marsh, I follow them on Twitter and their content is nothing short of inspiring and amazing.
I got this book because Jeffrey is nonbinary. My fiance is trans-nonbinary, and I'm transgender. I was hoping the book would be full of the incredible amount of love and positivity that Jeffrey exhibits online.
And it is. But there's a kicker.

1) This book perpetuates the incredibly toxic idea that to love someone else, you must
Lauren Tupper
Nov 15, 2016 rated it it was ok
Started reading this book on a whim. Enjoyable but also pretty standard fare. 2.5/5.
Jul 30, 2016 rated it really liked it
Shelves: books-won
I won this book. It's not a book I would have picked up on my own, but I expanded my bookshelf this evening and read it. The book is like an exercise in becoming your truest self. Marsh asks questions to make one think about who they truly are. Marsh asks the reader to do exercises in the book (designing a cape that represents the superhero you are inside, designing your perfect valentine). I'd recommend for a teen or young adult.
Jan 12, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
I wish I could go back in time and give this to any version of past me.
Oct 22, 2016 rated it liked it
I really liked the advice: The only way out is through.
Aug 26, 2016 rated it really liked it
Shelves: self-help, library
This self-help book had high energy and was very positive. It was very thin and each chapter was very short. Each chapter had activities to do and had personal reflections from the author and had a short stories also. This book is based on the author's own person journey so it is not fluff. I was impressed with the positiveness of the book. It is a simple book, not a lot of big words or hard things to follow, just simple tasks and positive energy. It is a great book to get you on your feet and ...more
Rygent Best
Dec 20, 2018 rated it really liked it
I didn’t complete the book. I got midway through. When I started the book I was having an issue grasping the tone of the writing. There were far too many short sentences that just reiterated what was said in the one previous, and far far too many exclamation points. Alongside that, the book is written by a gay, gender nonconforming, person. Obviously THIS ISNT THE ISSUE because there is nothing wrong with this, but this book is aimed towards those that have similar life experiences. I personally ...more
Apr 24, 2019 rated it really liked it
Jeffrey Marsh is a gift of a human being that our cynical and hateful society needs but doesn't deserve. I've been a fan of Marsh's videos for years now and was beside myself when I found out they had a book! It was a quick and easy read and very much in Marsh's voice.

That said, I don't think Marsh's message comes across as well in writing as it does in their videos. I wouldn't say they're a bad writer but I will say they're a much better orator. And while the book is advertised as being "for
Noelle Kravitz
Apr 17, 2018 rated it really liked it
Shelves: books-of-2018
-Positive, upbeat voice
-little activities after each lesson
-Relevant examples from author’s own life
-Information on people to know (Hero/ine)
-Good base for building positive thinking and self-esteem

-sometimes felt persuasive, not instructive

-If you feel like you need some comfort and positivity in your life right now, I’d recommend reading this. Marsh has an uplifting voice that gives a reassuring and supportive feel while both pointing out mindsets that don’t work and giving
Jul 05, 2019 rated it it was amazing
This book may take some time to understand in some places because it isn't your typical self-help book. It truly takes a new standpoint on authenticity and how to attain that while also caring for oneself. Jeffrey Marsh certainly has a unique perspective that they built up throughout their life, and it offers a sense of validation and self-trust that not many other books have given me. I found the book to be very unique and very worth the read. It's a good book to grab when going through a rough ...more
Jan 16, 2020 rated it liked it
I would probably give this a 3.5 if I had the option. This seemed like a book I was really going to enjoy and I did for some of it. It's a fast read and laid out in a really eye catching way. It included activities for you to do at the end of every chapter, which is great for a self-help type of book. Jeffrey writes in a way that is easy to read and likeable. His advice is all pretty standard, but easy to read and understand. It would appeal to tweens and teens really well. I also think this is ...more
Apr 02, 2018 rated it really liked it
Cons: I wished it had gone a little deeper with some of the concepts and been less repetitive. However, I think that's mainly because it's aimed at an audience that is younger than I am.

Pros: Despite the above, my copy is full of underlined passages. The lessons and advice about self-knowledge and self-acceptance are ones that even most adults struggle with all their lives. I've been recommending it all over the place.
Lee Ann
Apr 13, 2019 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2019
This is the first self help book I've ever read that bluntly says it's ok to be shy, and for that I love it. Shyness is so often portrayed as a flaw, and to finally hear someone say, no, it is not only ok to be shy, but it should be celebrated as something that makes you who you are... ugh, I love it.

On top of that it's just overall heartwarming and inspiring, as is all the content Jeffrey Marsh produces. 4/5 stars.
Mary 🌸
Jun 10, 2017 rated it really liked it
This is such an uplifting read and perfect for Pride Month! Jeffrey Marsh is a powerful youth advocate and a fantastic motivational speaker.
I would recommend this book to anyone who has ever felt judged, shamed, or ridiculed for being who they are. I would also recommend this to educators and anyone else who works with youth.
This book truly changed my perspective and outlook on the world for the better.
Leann Mary
Aug 28, 2018 rated it it was amazing
I finished this lovely book in about two hours on Tuesday. If you’re feeling overwhelmed with the way the world is going and could use a bit of positivity, buy this. It’s a self help style book based on life lessons and Buddhist traditions but @thejeffreymarsh’s positive attitude and radiance shines through on every page. It’s a reminder if you’re in a marginalized group (or not), to shine on. It’s the book every weird kid wishes they had available to them in middle school.
Aug 10, 2017 rated it really liked it
This book seems like it's more for a younger reader but that doesn't mean the book is bad. Jeffrey Marsh is a popular Vine star who became an internet sensation. They're a genderfluid star who is known for their soothing voice and trying their hardest to inspire people to be themselves. This book is basically him trying to do the same in book form. It's really well written and I think young people who are confused who they are and are trying to fit in. I recommend it.
Uge Saurio
Dec 07, 2017 rated it it was ok
I don't usually like self-help books and I thought this could be the exception based on other reviews but then it wasn't. I'm not sure what I expected. I wanted to like it and read it with an open mind but still it felt off most of the time. Maybe I'm not the target audience? It has a lot of good things but it is not the good kind of obvious (and maybe even some bad advice at times). I'm sure it can help a lot of people, just not me.
Imre Johnsen
Jan 23, 2018 rated it really liked it
This book was a good journey. There are points when I felt like Jeffrey really understands and speaks to me, while there are other times were I didn't really relate to what they were saying. Regardless of it all, ir was so good to read a book with such positive energy and so many fun interactive aspects. It's a lovely book, and I think I'll come back to it in the future.
Ann Bevans
Aug 16, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
A lovely book with a lovely voice

This book by the fabulous Jeffrey Marsh is a love letter to each of us. In their warm, unassuming way, Jeffrey offers love and encouragement to the one who needs it most - you!

“How to Be You” would be a great gift for any struggling teens in your life (and all teens are struggling in one way or another! Being a teenager is the hardest!). Don’t forget to pick up an extra copy for yourself! A joy to read.
Dr J
Dec 15, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: diversity
Written by a young queer youTuber, this is a great workbook style self-help book for anyone struggling to understand how they fit into societies expectations. Aimed at the young teenager and full of good positive ideas, and tales of being the queer "boy" who didn't fit. For extra credit check out their channel on YouTube for fun queer positive messages.
Katie Walsh
Mar 10, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Jeffery is such a pleasant person and it shows through their writing. I feel so uplifted and renewed by this story. I'm happy they shared some intimate thoughts with us. I love this. Thank you, Jeffery!
Dec 30, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Brilliant book. Inspirational, uplifting author.
Mar 24, 2018 rated it really liked it
I think this would have been really great for my younger self. Still some helpful bits to be reminded of, and a gentle way (without any overt politics, etc.) to introduce people to self acceptance
Jan 22, 2020 rated it really liked it
More like a 3.5 but rounded up. Wish i could have this on audio with Jeffrey reading it.
May 10, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Thank you, Jeffrey. I am a good person. I needed help accepting it.
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Host, author, and youth advocate Jeffrey Marsh has more than a quarter BILLION views across social media. As the creator of the global trends #DontSayThatsSoGay and #NoTimeToHateMyself, Jeffrey has earned spots on top Viner lists by both BuzzFeed and Vine with a positive, inclusive message. In 2015, Jeffrey was named official red carpet correspondent for both MTV/Logo and GLSEN and as a featured ...more
“You forget your bravery. You stop trusting yourself. Other people’s words “You shouldn’t be like that,” in whatever context, become your own words “I am wrong for being like this. It’s my fault.” 3 likes
“Heroes doubt themselves at first, just like you, but they go ahead anyway.” 3 likes
More quotes…