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Char

M. Caspian (Goodreads Author)

3.13 · Rating details · 89 ratings · 43 reviews

Dear Author,
With a baby face like this no one ever suspected I’d be the one. The one to burn it all down. I thought I’d feel regret, but with my dragon by my side I don’t need anyone else.

Surely, he’s not alone. Everyone deserves someone to love. Please help him.

Photo Description:
A round-faced young man stands angled toward the viewer, his vivid red hair falling around hi ...more

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ebook, 105 pages

Published November 19th 2015 by MMRomanceGroup.com

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· 89 ratings · 43 reviews

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Nov 19, 2015 M. Caspian marked it as my-writes · (Review from the author)

Wow, so, this is one of the most awkward ways to release a story, ever.

Char was written for the Goodreads M/M Romance group’s 2015 Don’t Read in the Closet event: Love is an Open Road. And I’m not a member of the M/M Romance group any more. Well, M. Caspian is, at least for a few more days. But I’m not. Emma Sea isn't.

As some of you may know, M. Caspian is my pen name. I created it because I didn’t want my friends to feel obliged to read, or say they liked, the tentacle-sex story I wrote back i Wow, so, this is one of the most awkward ways to release a story, ever.

Char was written for the Goodreads M/M Romance group’s 2015 Don’t Read in the Closet event: Love is an Open Road. And I’m not a member of the M/M Romance group any more. Well, M. Caspian is, at least for a few more days. But I’m not. Emma Sea isn't.

As some of you may know, M. Caspian is my pen name. I created it because I didn’t want my friends to feel obliged to read, or say they liked, the tentacle-sex story I wrote back in 2013 as a Xmas gift for my tentacle-loving friends. Yes, Kyn, it’s true: I wrote Kraken just for you. I’m sorry about the lack of MPreg.

That’s all it was going to be: just that one story. But Lisa Henry - who had no idea I was M. Caspian - as well as many other readers, were so enthusiastic and supportive that I just kept going and never looked back. Thank you, all, for your encouragement. So I won’t be stopping now. I’m trying to improve, and that means writing more stories.

I left the M/M Romance group last month. Not because of a story; never that. I left because when people of color expressed their hurt and discomfort about a story they were told, by a mod, to leave the group.

I understand that many of you don't agree with my perspective. It's an emotionally charged issue. I hope I won’t lose any more friends. We’re allowed to disagree - vehemently, passionately, disagree - and still be friends, if we treat one another with respect. That’s the beauty of friendship.

But I didn’t ask to pull this story from release. Because the Don’t Read in the Closet event is special. Char is a collaboration by many people who share a love of the m/m genre. A collaboration between Raevyn, Elizabetta, Sam, about six proof readers, thread wranglers, prompt wranglers, formatters, a quality assurer, my prompt-writer Vivian, a bunch of beta readers, and a group of supportive friends. So you see, the story is not just mine. I don’t have the right, at this point, to take my bat home and say I won’t play any more.

And yet, I can’t allow M. Caspian to benefit from the readership of a group that I left, without being open about the circumstances. So, it’s me. *waves* I’m Emma Sea and I wrote this story. Come say hi.

Char is for Vivian, with love. ...more

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Nov 19, 2015 Vivian rated it it was amazing

Shelves: freebies, dystopian, romance-fantasy

Burn it.

A love song of fire and promise.

Yes, this was my prompt. All I wanted was a dragon and fire; I got so much more than I ever imagined. I'm fairly certain that Caspian is psychic, for there are things here that were unknown. Coveted and mourned.

Fire is elegant, fierce, without mercy, and pure. Too incorporated here to be a separate character, yet, intrinsic and essential. To have this love, this dance scribed down both poetically and yet never losing that gritty reality is beautiful.

Thi ...more

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Jun 06, 2019 * A Reader Obsessed * rated it liked it

Shelves: lgbt, magic, mm-love, z-2019, angst-central, shifters, fae-fairies-elves, young-adult, damaged-dark-criminal, age-gap

3.5 Stars

My first M Caspian, and I barely survived.

Brutal, tragic, devastating in the violence and pain and lost chances.

However, revenge is burned by a hungry fire resulting in a glorious rebirth.

Fabulous premise, making me want more of the intriguing setup between a fae coming into his own and the loyal dragon that is forever his.

flag 36 likes · Like · see review

Nov 22, 2015 Lisa Henry added it

Shelves: freebie, something-in-my-eye, hardcore, m-m, paranormal, loves-landscapes, torture, lhnb

I can't rate this, since I write with M. Caspian.

But I can say this: M. has this ability to take a prompt and run with it, and end up somewhere completely different than I ever expected her to go. And I love that so, so much.

Warning: this is not a fluffy romance.

This is a story where the world burns and, after following Cian's journey, there's a part of you that knows it deserves to.

Not for the faint of heart. This is a story that will punch you in the face and then kick you when you're down ...more

flag 16 likes · Like · see review

Nov 19, 2015 Dee Aditya added it

Shelves: m-m, difficult-to-digest, angst, dark, fantasy, why-did-i-even-bother, violence-illegal-stuff, cover-love, reviewed, sick-twisted-characters

First half- 1 star
Second half- 3 stars
No overall rating.

I'm sorry, this is going to be a highly pissed off sounding post.

I have never needed brain bleach as much as when I read the first half of this story.
Heed the content warnings, people. (It should have come with a content warning that it might incite people to set things on fire. Things like their own selves.

The first half, nay first 3/4th of the story seems disconnected with the rest. The writer is trying to explain why Cian is so angry an First half- 1 star
Second half- 3 stars
No overall rating.

I'm sorry, this is going to be a highly pissed off sounding post.

I have never needed brain bleach as much as when I read the first half of this story.
Heed the content warnings, people. (It should have come with a content warning that it might incite people to set things on fire. Things like their own selves.

The first half, nay first 3/4th of the story seems disconnected with the rest. The writer is trying to explain why Cian is so angry and what pushes him to discover his power, but by the time I was done with it I was so wrung out. The multiple scenes of physical and sexual violence made me sick to my stomach. I kept at it to see what the point was, to see what the hell was going on, and I sort of feel like I wasted my time. I know M. Caspian doesn't shy away from the gritty, but this was a whole new level of no.

The second half is better, in that we actually see some stuff happenning that isn't just showing us how depraved we can be as human beings. We actually see some type of plot, but then again, it doesn't make any difference at this point. A pity, because I love things that have to do with microbiology and biology in general. I feel no sympathy for any of the chacters at all. And the plot leaves me mith more questions than ever, because a lot of things are never resolved. What the hell even happened to the elves anyway?

All fiction asks us to suspend disbelief, but since this is modern urban fantasy, I expect that some reaslim will be there. But this... this isn't asking me to suspend my disbelief, it is asking me to burn it down with dragon fire and then blow the ashes away so that it can never be found again. By the end, I was just tired of everything and had to resort to poking fun at everything to stay sane.

One shiny in the sea of sludge: I learned the name of two microbes, and I read some interesting thing about them because of this story.

There is literally nothing else in this book or me. I'm tired and angry and-- and-- *exhales*

...more

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Feb 28, 2017 Trio rated it it was amazing

Shelves: mm-romance, 100-pgs-or, p-author-free-ao3-other, sociology-abuse-dark

What an incredible story. I'm always so impressed by the quality of this author's writing, the story is so carefully structured and flows just perfectly. Beautifully descriptive prose throughout that just pulls me along, and *blink* it's over.

I love the creativity of the story - it was gorgeously dark in all the best ways. Really top notch. ...more

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Nov 20, 2015 Fifi LaFleur rated it really liked it

This was really interesting. Poor Cian gets used, abused, and put through the wringer. With one parent on his deathbed, one parent unavailable, he is left alone to survive in any way he can. Like a Phoenix rising from a pyre of his own making, he is reborn to burn.

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Nov 19, 2015 Makhda rated it liked it

Shelves: mm-romance, paranormal-scifi, rape-non-con, mates, age-gap, 2015-reads, dritc-2015, rentboys-pornstars-strippers

I read for fun. For an escape. First half of this book gave me a glimpse of real life that I don't want to see. I admit I step back for a while before I dive back in. All I can say is this is not fluffy. Absolutely not. Look elsewhere if you're looking for something romantic. This is dark and gritty. Well it's M. Caspian's after all. I bet you guys know her style. I haven't even read her 'Kraken'. I will though.

What I liked :
- The background story about microbiology. Really interesting stuff.

W ...more

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Nov 19, 2015 Mercedes rated it liked it

Shelves: mm-romance, fantasy

Well, this was interesting to say the least. First, please note the warning because this is dark. There's a lot of rape and violence.

Second, and I can't stop thinking of this, have you watch the movie Contagion? Well, the event that happens towards the end wouldn't have contained the "spread of the thing." Just watch the movie and you will understand why.

I don't know that I would call this even a romance. There is very little of it. Like 5-10% if any at all. This story is not fluffy at all, and ...more

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Dec 31, 2019 Eugenia rated it liked it

Shelves: fantasy, urban-fantasy, dark, mm-romance, paranormal, shorts, shifters, dritc, freebies, rentboy-sex-worker

Short, graphically violent and disturbing with gang rape, step-incest, non-con sex, non-con drug use, grooming, pseudo-child exploitation.

The writing was confusing at times. I expect dark with an M. Caspian book—this one made me twist and grimace with the shadow world she depicted.

It’s my least favorite of hers so far not because of content but due to the choppy writing and the fact that the MC seemed excessively weak and the secondary characters (Pop, in particular) difficult to imagine.

My r ...more

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Nov 19, 2015 FantasyLiving rated it it was amazing

Shelves: own-on-ereader-read, 00-five-stars, theme-mm-erotica, character-shifters, genre-paranormal, theme-dark-erotica, content-break-your-heart, character-damaged-hero, theme-m-m, content-abuse

As with The Arroyo and Kraken you are in for a story that touches the edges of horror with the captivating promise of something almost sweet, or rather, not quite so bitter.

The innocence is lost for Cian as he takes on the role of caretaker to his dying father, while he is pointedly ignored by his Pop, who walked out 5 years prior. Trying to make ends meet, while he wills his father to continue living, not to leave him alone, he asks his older boyfriend to get him a job as a rentboy. All the wh ...more

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Nov 20, 2015 Lori S. added it

This story is all over the place. Cian is not only messed up, but easily manipulated by the people around him, easily used and abused and he doesn't learn anything from the experience. While I feel bad for him, his actions at the end come across as a teenager acting out without thought and there are no consequences for him either.

There are a number of elements drawn from a wide variety of sources: the microbes developed to eat oil spills which are unstoppable, except by fire (a theme I think was ...more

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Jun 17, 2017 Aղցela W. rated it really liked it

Shelves: dark-erotica, free, alpha-male, m-m, 100-200pg

This was a short quick dark read that had some dark scenes in it. Cian could not get a break everything thing in his life is falling apart. When his boyfriend convinces him to sell himself it gets worse. I really liked his friend Reese. After a painful night he realizes Reece was more than a friend to him. This was my first time reading this author. This book was well written with no errors in grammar or spelling. I am looking forward to reading more from this author.

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May 22, 2017 ⚣Michaelle⚣ rated it it was amazing

Shelves: m-m-romance, fantasy-magic-paranormal, shifters, z-06-uc-jeopardy-mm

4.5 Stars

Holy moly! This is one hell of a story, and it packs one painful wallop...

Heed the warnings because those scenes were rough; unfortunately, I felt like they were completely necessary to Cian's character development, to provide a well of anger and hate to draw fire from when he needed it.

Also, everything that happened to Julian, Stephen and Vaughan? Well-deserved. That the rest of Portland (I think it's Portland) had to suffer Stephen's hubris and Julian's greed? Eh, like Cian said, "We 4.5 Stars

Holy moly! This is one hell of a story, and it packs one painful wallop...

Heed the warnings because those scenes were rough; unfortunately, I felt like they were completely necessary to Cian's character development, to provide a well of anger and hate to draw fire from when he needed it.

Also, everything that happened to Julian, Stephen and Vaughan? Well-deserved. That the rest of Portland (I think it's Portland) had to suffer Stephen's hubris and Julian's greed? Eh, like Cian said, "We lose the city. But we save the world." The story is perfect just the way it is, but man, what I wouldn't give to know how Cian deals with the aftermath...because he seems like the kind of man that would agonize a bit afterwards, constantly re-living and remembering what he would see as his own personal weakness, his emotional need to keep his dad alive, that eventually led to the destruction.

(Major props, too, as the GMO bacteria in this story brought to mind the world-destroying substances of Ice-Nine in Cat's Cradle and grey-goo mentioned in Engines of Creation: The Coming Era of Nanotechnology. Scary shit that seems an entirely more likely scenario for the end of the world than an alien invasion or rogue asteroid strike.)

Okay, so I also wanted to maybe mention something that really hasn't coalesced much in my brain but still made me think after it was so casually mentioned: (view spoiler)

Finally, there's some small part of me that kind of thought the future Reece helped Cian to see, with nature claiming everything, taking it all back like something out of The Future is Wild - well, it was kind of nice. Maybe it's a reset button that needs to be pushed? ...more

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Jan 01, 2016 Chappy rated it really liked it

Shelves: erotica, mm, dark, shifter, faeries, 2016-botb, emotional-angst, epic-fantasy, paranormal

3.5 stars

Much of this story was quite dark and difficult to stomach at times. Everything is Cian's life is falling a part and everything he tries just seems to make is worse. His boyfriend is just horrible and he encourages him to become a whore...

The only constant in his life is his friend Reese. I just wished that we could have gotten more details about the whole "fae" component and the story ended just as stuff started getting good...*sigh* ...more

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Nov 19, 2015 Bookbee added it

Shelves: rentboy-sexworker, younger-older, m-m, free, on-line-fiction, shapeshifters, taboo, urban-fantasy, 2015, dritc-2015-love-is-an-open-road

First and foremost - HEED the WARNINGS!

Second - Vaughn, Julian and Stephen got off too easily. There should have been more suffering for them.

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Nov 19, 2015 Don Bradshaw rated it liked it

Shelves: rape, shifters, family-drama, dragons, fae, short, prostitution

My heart broke for Cian. The poor kid struggled for every crumb that he could get. I don't think that the gang rapes were necessary to the story except that Vaughan awoke Cian's fire. Steve deserved exactly what he got. There were some nice surprises in the story but a terrible amount of violent destruction. ...more

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Nov 19, 2015 Bree Cheese rated it really liked it

Shelves: m-m, free-online, fantasy

Going through my To-Read section today and realized that there are so many books that I have read, but forgot to rate. Bad Bree!

I totally enjoyed this super dark story. Head the warnings!

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Nov 24, 2015 Kevin added it

I felt dirty while reading this. It was bleak and parts were frankly uncomfortable and disgusting. I started skimming to find the good parts, but didn't come across any. ...more

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Nov 01, 2018 Melanie~~ rated it really liked it

Shelves: format-kindle-or-mobi, online-freebie

This is an M/MR writing event story. I almost always rate them 4 or 5 stars because I truly appreciate the gift of their talent and time to the free story they give to the group and its members.

That said, I’m not strong enough for this story. I’m shocked I made it through but for the application of great skimming. It is well written, and I liked the last 20 - 25% of the story. The first 75% or so was miserable and painful to read because of all that Cian was put through. This book is not easy to ...more

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Mar 18, 2018 Regencyfan93 rated it it was ok

Shelves: i-own-it, deleted

I had a hard time reading this to get to the point of dragon appearing. I skipped many pages during the descriptions of forced drug use and gang rape.

Reece was the best part of the book!

Cian made SO MANY bad choices. When he has agency, he gives it away to someone who abuses him. Repeatedly. You've heard the saying "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me."? I wondered why Cian kept making the same bad choice and expecting love.

Maybe Cian is a typical teenager, making continually ...more

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Nov 19, 2015 Carol rated it really liked it

Shelves: gay-romance

Very hot non-con scenes, a sweet romance and a whole lot of violence. But this is not for the faint-of-heart.

Even if I understood his motives, Cian is not a nice boy. There are not many good guys overall. So if you have a problem with morally dubious situations and characters, this might not be for you.

I thought the immorality paired with the violence and some very poetic, quiet scenes made this story very memorable. So, I definitely recommend it. If you are looking for something fresh,you a

...more

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Nov 22, 2015 C rated it it was ok

Shelves: mm-romance, goodreads_free, genre-scifi, genre-dragons

Disturbing, felt gratuitous with no good reason. I finished but it was a close thing, I only wanted to see Stephen and Julian get some justice but that even ended up being very unsatisfying.

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Nov 22, 2015 Kathleen rated it it was ok

Shelves: urban-fantasy, freebie, dragons

Could have done without the rape scenes, and Cian acting like milquetoast. Story had some good bones. Didn't care for the execution. ...more

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Nov 29, 2015 Kira rated it it was ok

Shelves: i-didn-t-sign-up-for-this-bullshit, lor-event, gritty-grittyness

This story is chock-full of nastiness, and the warnings don't really prepare you for it. The non-consensual graphic abuse of various kinds starts almost from page one and barely ceases until 75% mark or so.

But my rating is not because I can't handle books like that.

It's actually really well-written. If you can stomach all the depravity, it's impossible to stay indifferent to this - you might be full of sympathy, you might rage, you might hate with a passion or feel some strange kind of glee, but ...more

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Nov 23, 2015 Ana rated it it was ok

It was ok, but i have some issues with this story. The first half was realy interesting and i could't stop reading, but as i keep reading i start to losing interest and near to the end i forced myself to finished it. What it bother me about it was that sometimes it seams to me as if it were two diferent and very disconnected stories and maybe both (one with Vaughn and Cian's father and othere one with Reece), good enough to be told separetedly. I do understand that is all part of the same story ...more

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Jan 09, 2016 Sandra marked it as to-read

Shelves: under-125-pages, dark, love-is-an-open-road-2015, freebies, m-m, own-but-not-read-yet, paranormal-romance, faerie-stuff, fantasy, dragon-stuff

Offered for FREE from the M/M Romance Group's Love Is An Open Road event. Thank you too all the amazing authors who participated! ...more

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Nov 19, 2015 Obione rated it did not like it

Shelves: my-crap-pile

This was soooo boring and stupid. Waste of my time.

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May 13, 2021 UnusualChild{beppy} rated it it was ok

Shelves: guy-love-between-2-guys, 2-5-stars, crossing-borders, deities-and-the-fantastical, blink-and-you-will-miss-it, barely-old-enough-to-vote, the-oldest-profession, rape, it-started-with-a-friend, freebies

2.5 stars

Cian's father is dying, he's not going to graduate his final year of high school, his boyfriend is...well, the less said about him the better, and his other dad is more involved with his new boyfriend and life than in anything else. Cian is trying to hold it all together, helping his dad, taking some comfort from his boyfriend, and some real comfort in his friend Reese. When his boyfriend helps him make money by selling Cian's body, and then convinces Cian to do it again in order to kee ...more

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Jul 06, 2019 Barbara rated it liked it

Shelves: dark-reads, anticlimax, disturbing, fave-authors, age-difference, sex-with-other-characters-not-mcs, teen-mc, paranormal, sex-w-other-xters, non-con

I REALLY wanted to like this more than I did. 😞

I love M. Caspian, and I don't even bat an eyelash at her dark dark writes which she executes so very beautifully. ❤ I know EXACTLY what I'm signing up for when I pick up one of her reads - she could LITERALLY take me anywhere.😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈😈

The problem I had with this is the second half felt rushed through, so much so that I lost the connection I'd built to the characters in the first half.

I think given enough time and space to spread her win ...more

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