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The Likeability Factor: How to Boost Your L-Factor and Achieve Your Life's Dreams

3.69  ·  Rating details ·  939 ratings  ·  60 reviews
From the bestselling author of Love Is the Killer App

You can win life’s popularity contests

The choices other people make about you determine your health, wealth, and happiness. And decades of research prove that people choose who they like. They vote for them, buy from them, marry them, and spend precious time with them. The good news is that you can arm yourself for the c
Paperback, 224 pages
Published April 25th 2006 by Crown Business (first published January 1st 2005)
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Average rating 3.69  · 
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Nov 22, 2007 rated it liked it
From a blog post I wrote in 2005:

I saw this book on sale at Border's, looked it over, then saw it on the shelf at the library that same night. What, the heck, maybe the book gods are trying to tell me something?

The full title is Likeability Factor: How To Boost Your L-Factor & Achieve Your Life's Dreams. Sounds a little cheesy, doesn't it? The author is Tim Sanders and he's a leadership coach at Yahoo!

Sanders' provided a lot of documentation to back up the intuitive fact that people who are more
Feb 26, 2009 rated it really liked it
Shelves: business
If you've noticed a trend here, I'm a pretty big fan of Tim Sanders! I just can't help it—he has such a pleasurable way of writing while, at the same time, introducing me to think about concepts (in this case, the idea of being well liked) in entirely new ways.

For example, with "The Likability Factor," this passage on page 20 made me stop in my tracks: "Our nation is so focused on efficiency and productivity that we forget that likability is truly our lifeline. People who are likeable, or who ha
Jan 17, 2016 rated it really liked it
This timeless book is an excellent study of human interaction and communication science. This topic is not one that would come up in a daily conversation, yet it encompasses most of our encounters with people. I appreciate the simple, straightforward material which is not overly scientific and clinical, but common sense and easy to apply. The exercises focus on sharpening personal skills as well as imagining ourselves in others' situations and learning to understand their emotions and thoughts. ...more
Feb 01, 2017 rated it really liked it
Prior to reading this book, I was self-aware of a need to develop my "L-factor." The book contains a heavy dose of common sense. Author breaks down likeability into Friendliness, Relevance, Empathy and Realness in a way that is easy to understand and logical with good examples. I was able to identify a specific way I'm sabotaging my friendliness that I'll immediately correct as well as techniques to tweak my ability to be empathetic. I expect these small changes will pay dividends in my relation ...more
Devon Stoneburg
Feb 25, 2019 rated it it was ok
Sander's theories are solid, but I found myself calling him Capitan Obvious after a while. Yes, if you are friendly, you will go farther than an unfriendly person... It seems like common sense. I didn't find anything Earth shattering in this book. ...more
Apr 21, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: Everybody
This book is absolutely great! I learned many new ways of observing yourself to determine how to make your interactions with others more pleasureful. Trying out some of the ideas in this book will definitely make your life more enjoyable for yourself and those around you. Very good read! Most warmly recommended. Yes, the content could be presented in 60% of the pages. Particularly the first chapter could be very much shorter. But this does not take away from the many most interesting ideas prese ...more
Deborah Frey
Apr 14, 2012 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: classic
When I was teaching, The L-Factor altered the psychological complexion of my college lecture rooms. Students rarely missed class, because if they did, they MISSED something! Advice to any professor who strives to drive home the value of connecting, use the L-Factor tools to change the game up. Your students will wake up as they tumble toward graduation, even after spring break!
Dec 02, 2010 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
liked it! a lot of times these books can be ridiculous but I thought it was modern and well written and also emphasizes the larger picture of what CAN and DOES happen if you improve your likeability efforts (something i am working on....ok?)
Ryan Mckenzie
Jun 04, 2012 rated it it was ok
Um...skip the first half and go to section II - increasing your likeability factor. Then skim that for the steps in italics, reading sections as you want more information. Much of it is common sense unless you are a Vulcan. ;)
Brandon Still
Apr 14, 2020 rated it really liked it
In this book, Tim Sanders lays out the importance of likeability, and the influence it has on your life and the lives of others. Sanders states that "the choices you make in your life don't shape your life as much as other's choices about you." This quote really hit me as this book unpacked the elements of likeability, and how to improve them. Sanders illustrates those elements to be friendliness, relevance, and empathy, which come to equal realness and a person's ability to be genuine. These ch ...more
Rositsa Prokopieva
Sep 09, 2018 rated it liked it
The first two chapters provided great insight into the correlation between likability and social, professional and personal success. I enjoyed the in-depth empirical research provided in support of the idea that livability is necessity in our age of technology. The book is simply based on the idea that our personal and professional life separation doesn’t exist and we need to build specific habits to have, scientifically proven, better life.

Regarding the practical part of the book, witch is from
Kenny Parnell
Aug 19, 2017 rated it really liked it
Some good points on empathy and personal awareness. The second book I've read this year that talks about having a personal manifesto, so maybe I should act on that now. I'm a big Tim Sanders fan and this one didn't disappoint. ...more
Gwen Lester-Cunningham
Feb 08, 2020 rated it it was amazing
Loved it! This book explains it all. If you're wondering why things aren't going your way, you probably have a low likability factor. This book was a real eye opener for me. A premise so simple, be friendly, smile - yet so profound. It makes you look at yourself and see what others see. ...more
Nawress Aouamri
Aug 02, 2018 rated it really liked it
It is so motivating ❤️
Brian Larsen
Aug 27, 2018 rated it it was ok
Read “How to Win Friends and Influence People” instead.
Mar 22, 2020 rated it did not like it
Shelves: abandoned
It seems to be mostly about why it would be good to be likable. By the 3rd chapter it had said a lot about that & almost nothing about how to make any improvement, so I gave up.
Vitali Voughan Vazquez
Well written, but personally I kept losing interest in the book and ended up forcing myself to read till the end.
Candy Einshel
May 09, 2021 rated it it was ok
It's a nice book, not a life-changing book. Easy-reading. ...more
Jul 21, 2019 rated it really liked it
Loved it. Quick read and full of goodness on every page.
Jan 05, 2013 rated it really liked it
Shelves: business
It is always good to have someone else tell you what generally makes people 'likeable' for too easily can you stray from that. Every one has a different likeability factor that is influenced by many things but the book provides focus on what works across a wide audience. Even though many of the concepts are 'obvious' sometimes these do need to be focused on.

The book provides a good guide to some factors that you can implement to certainly improve you 'likeability' which can generally lead to add
Dec 29, 2013 rated it really liked it
Shelves: growth
1. Your generosity with your deepest truest self is a gift and most people will respond by admiring your realness and raising your L-factor.

2. Stop eating lunch alone.

3. Likeable teachers often become positive influences on their students. Students become better learners when they experience warmth and friendliness when they receive praise, recognition, and respect.

4. If you make people feel great, they will listen to you, think about what you said, and store it someplace in their hea
Jan 25, 2017 rated it did not like it
Shelves: unliked
I while ago I heard this book recommended on the radio and it seemed very interesting, so I looked for it on the Internet. I had already read Carnegie's book 'How to Win Friends and Influence', and I expected this one to be similar. I started the book with high expectations but these started to fade away as I read the book. I thought the ideas could have been explained in fewer words and without the unnecessary padding. I've tried the tips advised in both books and found out that some just don't ...more
Jan 16, 2013 rated it liked it
Tim Sanders spends the first half of this book explaining why it is important to be likeable. Not only does it lead to success at work and more dates, likeable parents produce happier children, likeable teachers create better students, and being a likeable patient gets you better medical care. I found the first part of the book to be overly long as I do not find the value of being likeable to be a matter of great controversy. The second half of the book is devoted to exercises and practices to h ...more
Matt Maples
May 20, 2010 rated it it was ok
Shelves: leadership
I really enjoy Tim Sanders, but I felt that this book was pretty self explanatory and not very insightful. The book was about how to be likable doing things like listening and showing empathy to others. These are extremely great things to do that are essential to be likable, but it just seemed as though it wasn't necessary for entire book to say it. With that aside if you struggle with people then you should look into this book as Tim Sanders is very a very engaging and interesting author. I wou ...more
Jeff Wombold
Feb 03, 2012 rated it liked it
There was a lot of good information in this book, but I believe the author made it way to difficult a subject. The author broke likeability down into psychological and physiological attributes that he thought were the key to likeability. Personally I don’t think it’s that hard to liked! People are born likeable, but something in life drives them to being unlikable; maybe that’s the better subject. To me the Bible said it best, “Do unto others as you would have them do to you”! This is the master ...more
May 20, 2011 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Synopsis: Being likeable is a critical component to having good relationships with you family, at work and in other areas of life. This book explores how anybody can increase their likeability factor by boosting their friendliness, relevance, empathy and realness with those around you.

My Review: I enjoyed listening to this book and learned a great deal. It was interesting to think about the factors discussed and how I could apply them in my life.
Jan 04, 2008 rated it really liked it
I learned more from this book than his first. It taught me that it's more important to be yourself than schmooze just to get what you want. This is an excellent read for anyone in business (whether for themselves or as an employee) who has to interact with others on a regular basis. You will go further in life, if you are NICE!
Jul 23, 2008 rated it it was ok
I feel I personal follow a lot the principles in this book, but the one that I took away was "relevance" with regards to who we are friendly with. I didn't realize how our preception of what the other person can offer drives how we interact with them. The hard lesson here is that the relevance most likey show itself until long after we form the friendship. ...more
Dec 15, 2011 rated it really liked it
Shelves: business
This was an easy read and one I can relate to. I truly believe in the power of the L factor, but wonder how easy it is for someone who is not naturally likable to adopt his suggestions and be likable. I also wonder how to be authentically likable, where vulnerability and honesty play an important role.
Mostly intuitive writing. But just because something sounds intuitive when I hear it doesn't mean I think of it all on my own. There were a few cool kernels in here. Mostly reading it put me in the open state of mind to make considerations for people throughout my day more than I normally would. Recommended. ...more
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“One of the more stressful parts of modern life is dealing with all the unlikeable people who populate it. If they don’t kill themselves with their own unpleasantness and rudeness, they’ll drive the rest of us to drink.” 0 likes
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