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293 pages, Kindle Edition
First published February 15, 2016
“I suspect if there is a chance for you here, it’s the last one. Last call.”“Last call,” I echoed, knowing it was the truth. I had to step up and order or walk out. And I wasn’t ready to leave.”
“It was real. No more walking away. No more fighting him, fighting us. I saw the path behind us, saw the path that lay before us, and I knew we would survive, as long as we never gave up.”
“Rose...we’re no good together. We’ll only keep hurting each other, over and over again. It’s vicious and destructive. Look what we’ve done to each other. We don’t know another way, but I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I don’t want to hurt.”
‘There was really only one con, but it was too real.
I don’t trust myself around him.
As much as I liked to pretend that I was completely over Patrick, the truth was that I missed him. I missed my friend. I missed the man who’d woken me with a kiss and left me with a smile. I missed his touch. His words. His presence.’
‘I looked into her eyes, trying to decipher whatever was behind them, though it was just beyond me. I wanted to tell her I wanted to stay forever. I wanted to tell her needed her. I wanted to touch her lips and tell her that she was mine, and I was hers. But I smiled, not saying what I wanted to. Just like old times.
Slow and steady.’
‘I threw my hands up. “Ugh, stop looking at me like that, Patrick.”
He took another step, his eyes smoldering deeper still. “Like what?”
“Like you want to eat me.”
Another step. “I’ll stop when you do.” The words were a quiet promise. One more step. He was just inches from me, stealing my breath.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I whispered, my eyes still locked on his.
He slipped a hand into my hair. “I think you do.”
“No, I don’t.”
“Then tell me to leave. Look me in the eye and tell me to go.”
I searched his eyes and opened my mouth to speak as thoughts screamed through my brain like sleet. But instead of saying the word I should have said, I closed my eyes and pressed my lips to his.’
“I’m sorry,” she said after a while.
“No. You don’t have to be sorry for anything, Rose. Nothing. Everything we’ve been through, these months … it’s my fault. It’s my fault, and I’m sorry, but you’ve already forgiven me for that. So I don’t want to think about it anymore. I don’t want to think about life without you. I just want to love you, and I want you to love me. I trust you, and I want you to trust me. And if you do, if you really do, then I believe we’ll always survive. We’ll always find a way through. Because there’s no one, Rose —not one person in the world who I could ever love like I love you.”
Sometimes, you have the whole world in your hands, and you don’t realize it until it’s shattered, left crumbled and sparkling in your palms. That you don’t know you’ve lived your best days, not until they’re gone. Not until you look back. That day – the day I walked away – was one of my greatest mistakes, and I’ve made more than my share. It’s the only one I counted as a regret.
“Being with her was like …” I looked away at nothing in particular. “It was like seeing in color for the first time after a lifetime of black and white.”
“I just can’t fuck it up this time.”
“No, you can’t. I suspect if there is a chance for you here, it’s the last one. Last call.”
“Last call,” I echoed, knowing it was the truth. I had to step up and order or walk out. And I wasn’t ready to leave.
“Cheers to the end, because every story that ends begins another. Cheers to beginnings, that they may be full of hope and love. And cheers to you, my friends, for being a part of ours.”
“It was like seeing in color for the first time after a lifetime of black and white.”
“Rose and I were bad for each other. There was no repairing what we’d shredded – we’d done enough damage for a lifetime.”
“You go all in and fight for her when shit goes down. Don’t let her walk away. Don’t walk away from her. Love her, man. Love her like you do.”
“Working your way in like a goddamn emotional ninja.”
“Aren’t we just a bunch of conspirators?”