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Loving People: How to Love & Be Loved
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Loving People: How to Love & Be Loved

4.21  ·  Rating details ·  232 ratings  ·  25 reviews
Your personal guide to learning how to love.

When you say or hear the words "I love you" it can change your life forever. Love is one of God's most important gifts to anyone, yet there are many misunderstandings about how to make love work in our families, friendships, marriages and dating relationships. In Loving People, best-selling author Dr. John Townsend shows you that
Hardcover, 201 pages
Published January 1st 2008 by Thomas Nelson Publishers
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Christopher M.
Jul 25, 2011 rated it liked it
The reason I can't give this book 5 stars is twofold. First, for a book about love, written by a Christian, Townsend didn't do too well at tying the topic back to the gospel. If we truly only know what love is in the context of Jesus' sacrifice for us while we were still sinners, I think that ought to play a major role in any book about love between people or otherwise. Secondly, Townsend defines love as "seeking and doing the best for another person." I like this definition, but he does little ...more
Violet Stone
Oct 10, 2019 rated it really liked it
For now this is 4 stars but I'm undecided. While it is a good book the structure needed a little work, I think. ...more
Erin Henry
4 stars up until the last chapter on romantic love. Wish I’d read that one a long time ago. He defines love as “seeking and doing the best for another”. The chapters focus on how to become a more loving person in all your relationships. He reminds us that love is a powerful force for good, the power of God in the world.
Nov 18, 2019 rated it liked it
I read this book because I struggle with my own selfishness and with not being more loving (not thinking of romantic love necessarily, but generally loving others).

Although Townsend does bring in Bible verses and principles, I couldn't really say it is a biblically-based book. Surprisingly absent from a book by a Christian about love was any discussion about the classic biblical passage on love, 1 Corinthians 13 (except for verses 1 and 13).

I got a lot of helpful points and thoughts from the bo

Crapp. The second season of life, of saying yes to the good things, following the boundaries book which was saying no to the wrong things. If we only knew how to genuinely love people better!! Love God, love people, so the motto has been .. a slowwww incrediblyyyy slowwww rewardinggg beautifull humbling journey tis. Exploration, growth, discomfort, more stretching to be continued. Gahhflrjflx..
Taunya Marie Palmer
May 29, 2019 rated it did not like it
A hard read

I skimmed through the last half of this book. Whi!e I appreciate the need to be aware of others' feelings, especially in tough situations, I felt like this book pushed too much to treat every interaction like a deep, life changing event. This was a depressing read at best.
Aaron Cash
Nov 12, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This book is an amazing book about how to live out the 1 Corinthians 13 lifestyle with the people around you. Recommended for any age, stage or relationship status as a way too guide you in the gift of loving people.
Jan 28, 2021 rated it liked it
Shelves: read-2021
Read as audiobook
Laura Dallas
Jul 30, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: faith
The best relationship book I have ever read.
Farah D Clarke
Feb 09, 2019 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Eye Opening

This book has help me understand a great deal about loving! Especially on how to love some of the most difficult people in my life, especially with my mother.
Mona Randall
Dec 31, 2017 rated it it was amazing
What a great growth inspiring read! I also love the title, "Loving People". It could be an action or description. Highly recommended reading. ...more
Sophie Gissovska
Dec 06, 2017 rated it it was amazing
This book brings healing, hope and more clear image about real LOVE within human beings, with right intentions and right borders as it was designed by God.
Mar 04, 2011 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
An excellent book on what love is and what it takes to accept love from other and to give it in return. The aspects of love that it deals are connecting, truth telling, healing, letting go, and romancing. [return]This is a book that for me is one that I will want to get and refer to again and again as I seek to grow in the many areas it covers. The authors advice and explanations all made excellent sense to me. It has a Christian persective but that is not overstated I think anyone would benefit ...more
Laura Robb
One of the best books I have read on what it means to be a loving person. Townsend gives the Biblical definition of love, walks through the aspects of love, and provides real-life examples and ways to apply the concepts in each chapter.

"Learning to love others authentically, and in ways that matter to them, is one of the best things anyone can do...Experiencing and giving love are signs of life to us--that we are here, that God is real, and that our lives matter."
Jun 08, 2012 rated it liked it
I really enjoy the books I have read by Dr. Townsend, but this one seemed a bit elementary. The information seemed obvious (such as how to connect with people) unless you are just totally socially inept. Maybe I am wrong, but it seems obvious to me to pay attention to what the person is saying, lean forward, to genuinely be concerned and interested in them etc. But it might be helpful to certain people, just not me.
Jeff Bobin
Oct 08, 2013 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: relationships, love
We all want to be loved and knowing how to love and be loved is something we learn to do. It is not something that we do well without effort.

As our relationships change over time so does the way we express and experience love.

It starts with doing what is best for the person we love before looking to our own needs and desires.

I think this will go on my must read list for marriage and family life but there is something to learn here for everyone.
Jan 06, 2011 rated it really liked it
This book starts with I love You! These three words can change your life! How truly infinite is God's perfect love, And what a journey is to try to fully recieve His love and fully Give it away! I have read a chapter of this book and look forward to completing it and applying the truths in my life. ...more
Emil Bredahl
Jan 17, 2014 rated it it was amazing
This book is one of the best books that I have read for a very long time. A master piece that I would like to suggest to anyone who is looking for a good book to read. It is so challenging and convicting and through this book you will grow through hundreds of "Aha" moments.
Amazing book that is surely worth reading

Mark Manderson
Sep 22, 2016 rated it liked it
Learning to love others authentically and in ways that matter to them is the best thing you can do.
Love is seeking and doing the best for another.
My biggest takeaway is need to jump in the well with them when they're experiencing deeper emotions as our natural tendency is to gloss over and move away.
Sep 03, 2008 rated it it was amazing
Recommends it for: people who have issues showing emotion
Recommended to Shevonne by: No one
Townsend had great tips and solutions for people who have issues with showing and receiving love. I started using some of his advice, and people in my life started being more receptive. Definitely a great read.
Edmund Walton
May 21, 2013 rated it it was amazing
One of the best books ever~
Feb 27, 2012 rated it really liked it
One of those I would like to read again and again jsut to remind myself of its lessons... :)
Aug 22, 2008 rated it really liked it
Packed with great concepts. Read it twice.
Apr 02, 2011 rated it it was amazing
We were put on this earth to follow the mandate of Christ: to love God and to love others. Sometimes its hard to love people--especially if you think that they do not deserve your love.
Andrea Tomassi
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Jun 09, 2018
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Jan 23, 2012
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Jun 24, 2008
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