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I Can’t Believe You Just Said That: The Truth About Why People Are So Rude
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I Can’t Believe You Just Said That: The Truth About Why People Are So Rude

3.83  ·  Rating details ·  765 ratings  ·  104 reviews
Passive aggression. Road rage. Snarky tweets. Queue-jumpers. Idiots who are #justsaying. Fat shamers. Victim blaming. Furious waitresses who refuse to sell you a hot dog. We are ruder than we've ever been.

In this incisive and very funny book, Danny Wallace investigates the new wave of rudeness that threatens to overwhelm us. He travels the world, visiting our rudest critic
Paperback, 352 pages
Published June 15th 2017 by Ebury Press (first published March 3rd 2016)
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Average rating 3.83  · 
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Apr 11, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
Danny Wallace is a British writer whose numerous roles include film maker and comedian. Here he takes on the subject of rudeness in its many forms and explores it from many angles. It is a dense study of why rudeness has grown to tidal proportions in contemporary society, taking in plentiful sources. Danny's obsession with the topic derives from a comic hot dog incident in a cafe. He begins with an admittedly highly funny tale of Omar who in 2015 left his supermarket job and Britain to join the ...more
Jul 10, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: audible
Without doubt, listening to the Audible version of this book read by Danny Wallace himself is absolutely the best way to go. Since the whole premise is based on an anecdotal, much obsessed over, personal story of when a lady in a cafe was rude to him while he was trying to buy a's better having him tell it to you in his own voice, just like a friend would if it had happened to them. And that's precisely his point, we all have these tales of inexplicable rudeness, whether it's being t ...more
Kirsty ❤️
This book is enjoyable but it does feel a little repetitive. I found some sections interesting. There wasn't enough in here to keep my interest.

Can't fault the attention to detail though. It does come across very well researched and I did enjoy the hot dog anecdote at the beginning. I think we've all had our own madly escalating rudeness argument at some point.

Over all I liked it but felt that it may have been better as one or two magazine articles than a fully written book

Free arc from netgalle
Nov 01, 2018 rated it really liked it
I always knew that rude behaviour bothered me enormously, but I never knew why. Now I do, and I know that I'm not the only one either. This book has its ups and downs, but it is very informative on the way rudeness destroys our society, quality of life and our trust in other people's goodness. This is most detrimental to us as individuals, and as parts of different communities. I wish more people read this book, especially leaders and influencers. ...more
Jul 22, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: danny-wallace
Danny Wallace has long been one of my favourite authors thanks to his hilarious non-fiction. This book is less of an adventure than the likes of Yes Man or Join Me, instead being an exploration of rudeness and its impacts, with examples from Danny's own life. Although I miss his wild bets, this book is still interesting, informative and funny. In fact I would go as far as to say it's quite important - it goes into detail about the effects of being rude, which are far more serious than you might ...more
Jul 23, 2017 rated it really liked it
It turns out that I am ruder than I thought I was. An interesting, entertaining and amusing book written by a man who is far more patient than me when it comes to simple cook to order foods!
Sid Nuncius
I thought this was an excellent book. I tried it on a bit of a whim, not knowing quite what to expect, and it turned out to be witty, intelligent and genuinely insightful about the things which make people behave rudely, why such behaviour may be becoming more prevalent and, crucially, the damage it does to us both as individuals and as a society.

The great thing about I Can't Believe You Just Said That is that it is extremely readable and entertaining while saying genuinely important things. Whe
Jun 23, 2019 rated it liked it
Some interesting ideas and studies referenced. Definitely made me think about rudeness and how certain incidents have made me feel in the past (that I have allowed them to make me feel?). I do feel there is a line between honesty and rudeness and it’s normally the intention behind the words.
Becky Bentley
Apr 26, 2018 rated it it was ok
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Nicola Bell
Jan 09, 2018 rated it really liked it
I loved this book.
The good:
I loved the concept and the information. It was fascinating to go through the examples and studies on how people cope with rudeness, especially on how rudeness (and divorce!!) were catching. Really interesting.
I also loved the format and the writing style, which was engaging, witty and informative, without being too textbook.
The less good:
It would have been interesting to learn more about how people learnt to inoculate themselves against rudeness, which was touched
Adam Thomas
Aug 22, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: nonfiction-misc
After an encounter with an inexplicably rude hot-dog server, Danny Wallace decided to do some research to understand why she was so rude, and why it affected him so much. This book is the result of his findings. Through a mixture of personal anecdotes, popular science, case studies, and anthropological reflections, Wallace explores rudeness in all its forms, why it happens, what difference it makes, and what we should do about it. The whole thing is engrossing and very entertaining. I was partic ...more
Paul Allard
The book that I read is called:
I Can't Believe You Just Said That: The truth about why people are SO rude.

I presume that it's the same book - my review:
A book about rudeness – interesting but perhaps overlong
I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
I enjoyed Danny Wallace's study into rudeness today which is bang up-to-date and quite interesting. It looks into various aspects of rudeness from Donald Trump to ASBOs and looks into where it comes from in the first place
Jul 23, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
A fascinating, insightful and extremely funny look into the rise of rudeness in the world. After a dreadful experience when purchasing a hot dog Danny Wallace sets out to discover why we are rude, how we are rude, what the consequences are of being rude and we should all just stop it. Whilst it is littered with hilarious examples of rudeness and Danny Wallace's usual erudite wit it doesn't fail to shine a light on the seriousness of our less pleasant behaviours and it made me much more inclined ...more
Sep 02, 2018 rated it liked it
As you would expect from a book by this author, this is funny and entertaining. It also has substance. Wallace explores the psychology of rudeness and its effects on individuals and society. He speaks to various people, including academic researchers and professionals. What could have been a frivolously funny book, actually ended up being rather informative and thought provoking.
Aug 25, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction
Funny and well-written. I was hoping for more tips on dealing with the rude, but perhaps I shall just try to follow Wallace's example and let it go (eventually). ...more
Dec 03, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: health
a couple of years ago someone was so rude to me i actually lost an entire night's sleep over it and so i am in complete agreement with all the deleterious effects rudeness can have on our health. well worth a read. ...more
Nicoleta Faina
Aug 12, 2020 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: in-english, dk
Reading this book was very entertaining and eye-opening! Even though, it is not about etiquette, it boosted my understanding about British culture around politeness.
My favourite chapter was "Women And Rudeness".
Owen Townend
Aug 16, 2018 rated it really liked it
I work in a customer service role and, yes, members of the public can be brash and inexplicably rude. I'm also a fan of Danny Wallace's non-fiction so this book made for a very cathartic holiday read.

From interviews with 'rudeness' specialists to 'the Wallace Report', Wallace has really done his research here. And why? Ask the lady who refused him a hot dog.

In fact every time Wallace refers back to this hot dog incident and even brings it up before psychologists and statisticians, the more ridic
Katy Noyes
Jun 02, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Fascinating look at rudeness - very funny and had me pondering

We've all done it - not let another driver in, wished ill on somebody who didn't open a door for us - rudeness is all around us and nobody is immune from either giving or receiving it.

Danny Wallace has here done his own 'study' in the wake of a rather brutal encounter with a provider of hot meat products (hot dog seller) and examines both hers and his own behaviour in the light of his findings, as well as including facts and stories
May 12, 2017 rated it liked it
Shelves: reviews

Danny Wallace has written an entertaining book about why people are so rude. Is rudeness a modern phenomenon or have we always been a bit rude? It seems it is a modern thing and is everywhere. The book is amusing, slightly tongue in cheek at times but also has some underlying seriousness.

It's all starts with the Hotdog Incident. He describes it brilliantly and it's not difficult to picture the scene in my head. It started off okay, reasonably civil, then some doubts, then the irritation, the fru
Aug 31, 2016 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction, e-books
I love Danny Wallace's books so I always get excited about reading a new one and this was no different. The premise of the book is how rude the world has gotten. It's something I'd probably agree with. We live in a world where people think they can say what they want as long as it's followed by 'I'm just saying', thinking it'll soften the blow when often it doesn't. People are quick to flare up and the internet makes it easy to troll others. Danny talks to all sorts of people to uncover why the ...more
Jocelyn Gam
Sep 25, 2017 rated it did not like it
I'm sure he'd say I'm just being rude but this book honestly was so boring and a challenge to get through! I never stop reading a book once I've started and not since Gullivers Travels have I been so close to quitting.
This book is full of interesting facts, but I didn't want to read 300 page essay. I love Danny Wallace and was expecting at least a few laughs along the way but I honestly just found this book so dull with the occasional slightly interesting thing to think about.
Would have been a
I expected this book to just be full of funny anecdotes but I was wrong. Danny Wallace explores the psychology of why. He tells of not only his rude experiences with people but with the reasons why people are so rude. Overall, it was funny and insightful and hearing it read by Danny only enhanced the experience.
Elite Group
May 22, 2017 rated it really liked it
An eye-opening look at the growing plague of rudeness and its devastating effects on society

Writer and comedian Danny Wallace was once treated extremely rudely by a woman at a diner from whom he bought some hotdogs for himself and his son. He came away from the incident shocked and deeply affected and decided that, to help him come to terms with his experience, he would look further in to what makes people rude and how it impacts on our daily lives. After a few questions and a bit of digging,
Sep 19, 2018 rated it it was amazing
The best toilet book I've ever read™. I thought I might enjoy this book less, because I'd heard it plugged by Wallace on a few podcasts but it was still really good. At times his joke writing isn't funny and will just make you groan but other times it's more on point. The hook is the 'Hotdog Incident', which was very entertaining to read about and is a subtext to the whole book, it is referred back to every chapter. The book is essentially one man's odyssey to uncover what went wrong that day an ...more
A Reader's Heaven
(I received a free copy of this book from Net Galley in exchange for an honest review.)

Passive aggression. Road rage. Snarky tweets. Queue-jumpers. Idiots who are #justsaying. Fat shamers. Victim blaming. Furious waitresses who refuse to sell you a hot dog… We are ruder than we’ve ever been.
In this incisive and very funny book, Danny Wallace investigates the new wave of rudeness that threatens to overwhelm us. He travels the world, visiting our rudest critics, interviewing psychologists, psychi
Lisa Bentley
Jun 11, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Firstly, massive thanks needs to be said to Rebecca Hibbert at Penguin Random House who sent me a copy of Danny Wallace’s I Can’t Believe You Just Said That to review.

I am overly polite. I know that I am. I apologise when people bump into me and I profusely thank people when they do the smallest things for me. It is a problem. No not me being polite, it is how I respond to people who are impolite to me. As much as I am polite, I am also the person who will tell people that it is ok that they did
Saoirse Milotte
Jun 28, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: humour, non-fiction
Danny Wallace, comedian and all-round nice guy, has a life changing moment when a fast food server is inexplicably rude to him. Rather than seethe in silence he decides to investigate just what drives people to be rude, is it circumstance or are they born like that?

What follows is a fascinating, world-wide, exploration of the worrying new trend of rudeness. He talks to everyone from professors, self-help gurus and doctors to waiters, internet trolls and political aides, some believe rudeness is
Aug 20, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I've got to apologise for being rude to this book. I thought it would be fine, but no great shakes – a collection of thematically-linked reprints of the author's disposable but witty columns in the completely disposable and oh-so-easy-to-be-rude-about Shortlist magazine. Then I saw it was not that – although column-styled box-out asides do crop up. No, this is a serious study of rudeness – what it is, how it might have grown, what we think about it when we encounter it, what fraction of it we ad ...more
Oct 30, 2019 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
“In 2015, after 27-year-old Omar Hussain left his job at a Morrisons supermarket in Buckinghamshire and fled to the United Kingdom to join the radical terrorist jihadist group ISIS, he was extraordinarily disappointed to find out how rude they all were.” - The book starts with this sentence, and as you read it, you understand that this will be funny.

On the next page, author himself explains: “Politeness is extremely important to me, though sometimes I wonder if I set the bar too high. (..) I ha
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Daniel Frederick Wallace is a British filmmaker, comedian, writer, actor, and presenter of radio and television. His notable works include the books Join Me, Yes Man, and the TV series How to Start Your Own Country. As an author, Wallace's bestselling books have been translated into more than a dozen languages.

He began writing reviews for video game magazines at the age of 13 for school work exper

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