Mom and Dad Don't Live Together Anymore

by Kathy Stinson, Nancy Reynolds (Illustrator)

Kathy Stinson deals in a positive way with the confusion, insecurity and sorrow experienced by young children whose parents have separated. Each parent still provides the same love and caring--just not together anymore. "The story line is beautifully spare and the simple sentences and the perceptive, sensitive drawings mesh and enhance one another. The book has such an authentic look and sound that reading is like listening in on a privileged conversation." - Globe & Mail "…poignant and easy to read…" - School Library Journal

Genres: Divorce, Picture Books, Family

32 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1984

About the author

Kathy Stinson, author of internationally acclaimed Canadian children's classic, Red is Best and the TD Award Winner, The Man with the Violin, also writes novels, short stories, and nonfiction for young people of all ages.

Reviews

[Jabria · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mom and Dad Don't Live Together Anymore is a realistic-fiction book, about a little girl who splits time between both of her parents' houses and like certain things that both of her parents' homes have to offer. She sometimes gets upset when she doesn't know where she will be spending holidays, and thinks about if she will one day get married and get a divorce, and if her dad is getting re-married. Although these things sometimes make her sad, she finds joy and peace in knowing that both of her parents love her, but just not together. This book relates to my topic, because it is dealing with a child with a divorced family, even though the family isn't together that doesn't make them less of a family.

In my opinion the story is interesting to children, and offers children a lot of things to think about, question, and concern such as, how does she feel splitting time between both houses, and discussions about how separation or divorce can be hard, but at the end of the day parents still love their children no matter what. It utilizes style and language that are appropriate for children up to about the second grade level, but I think that the message is good for any child going through a separation or divorce at any age. It also includes realistic, and convincing characters.

The illustrations are accurate in terms of plot, setting, and characters and corresponds to the text. I think that the illustrations holds the children's interest while the text is read and enhance and add to the story by the pictures also adding an emotional element to the book and giving the children something to connect to.

As far as cultural aspects, this book seems to represent the character's culture and situation is a positive and relatable way. There are no negative stereotypes in my opinion, the books does a good job of showing how genuinely hurtful and confusing it can be to a child when their parents don't live together anymore and you spend your time between both houses. The characters also use speech that accurately represents their culture.

[Kim Van · Rating 4 out of 5]

I. This book is about a girl whose parents are divorced. She talks about how she now lives in two different places, sometimes at her dad's house and other days at her mom's house. Throughout the books names things that she likes living with her mom and what she likes about living with her dad other days. She realizes that even though they are separated now, and might not love her together anymore, they will keep loving her separately.
II. The major themes of this book are divorce and acceptance.
III. I give this book 4 stars. I think it is a really good book, especially for children going through what the main character goes through, but I won't give it 5 stars, because I think they could have elaborated on the situation more and could've gone more into detail.
IV. My parents are still together, but I remember when I was about 5 years old, one of my best friend's parents separated. I remember her being really sad at first and always wishing they would go back together, but after a while, she would always talk about the perks of living in two different places.
V. I would recommend this book to read to children whose parents are going through a divorce and might have difficulty dealing with the situation. This book might help them get more settled with the idea of their parents living separate lives.

[Jenny Conger · Rating 5 out of 5]

Book Title: Mom and Dad Don't Live Together Anymore
Author: Kathy Stinson
Illustrator: Vian Oelofsen
Reading Level: 1.7
Book Level: Pre K-3
Book Summary: A young girl expresses her sadness that her parents don't live together, but she emphasizes all the fun she has with both of them and recognizes they both love her.
Bookshelf Genre: Picture Book

Bookshelf Mentor Writing Trait: Ideas
Separation and divorce is challenging for everyone involved, but is especially hard for little ones. Young children have a lot of questions, and this book does an outstanding job at addressing them from the girl's perspective. The young girl's question about whether Santa will know which home she's at for Christmas is both touching and real. In the classroom, I would use this book as an introduction to journal writing. Having kids write about their families with free writing activities- describing their families, sharing the fun they have with different members, or telling an anecdote gives students the freedom to express their ideas, emotions, and feelings in a safe and encouraging place. Journaling gives students a voice for tough topics that they wouldn't necessarily verbalize out loud.

[Molly Cluff (Library!) · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book felt a bit choppy to me, also it got super REAL when the kid is worried if they’ll get divorced someday and if their dad will marry his new girlfriend. Explored how the kid wished their family would get back together, but they know it won’t happen. Overall pretty good, if not a little raw from dealing with some next-level emotional stuff.

[Fatima Seraj Alam · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is from the perspective of a child of divorced couple. It’s heartbreaking as she keeps wishing they would get back together and wouldn’t have to wait for weekends to see her dad even though she also realises the perks of having two homes. It ends on a sadder note : just not together 😭. Gave me all the feels.

[Jeanine · Rating 3 out of 5]

The child asks many questions, but doesn't get answers. This could be alright with adult guidance and discussion, but it is potentially more overwhelming without it.

[Meghan Edwards · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was ok. Not the best to explain about divorce/separation to a young child. And the whole concept of will Dad marry Paula just felt off-putting.

[Mikey James · Rating 4 out of 5]

Second book I’ve read in chinese. A nice way to explain divorce to kids.

[Jason Scott · Rating 3 out of 5]

sad but realistic

I wouldn't read it to a kid who wasn't already going through difficult emotions

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

This narrative tells about a divorce from the perspective of a young girl. The main character and her brother share time between Mommy’s apartment in the city and Daddy’s house in the country. The author, Kathy Stinson, shares the honest concerns a child might have about separation through the voice of a little girl (ex. “when I grow up, will I get married and then get apart?” “I wonder where we’ll be on Christmas”). This story shows the children enjoying time with both Mommy and Daddy and teaches that although they are not together, they still love their children the same. As a teacher, I would use this text to teach the concept of print because the book has short, simple sentences that run along the bottom of each page. It is the perfect book for pointing to the words as you read, especially since Vian Oelofsen’s adorable illustrations so perfectly match the text. I really enjoyed that Stinson and Oelofsen even showed each parent engaging in physical activities with the children (ex. “we went camping with Daddy,” “Mommy played soccer with us”). Also, because Stinson herself is part of a blended family (ex. she is both a mother and step-mother), I feel she is able to give an accurate example of how a child might feel about her parents separating.

[Shanice · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is about a little girl whose parents are divorced. She wishes her parents would get back together. She has fun when she is with her mom and has fun when she is with her dad but she wishes she can have fun with them together. She also worries about whose house she will be at for the holidays and wondering why her parents can't make each other happy. This book is very good for young children who may still wish their parents were still together. the emotions of the main character are very strong and may be relatable for children. The text is easily read and appropriate for all ages to comprehend. The language used may help children with questions they may want to ask their parents. The illustrations go well with the text and are easy for young children to follow if the are unable to read.

Quote from the book "I love my mommy and my daddy. My mommy and my daddy love me too. Just not together."

[Chloe Jackson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mom and Dad Don't Live Together is a story about a little girl whose parents are divorced. She talks about the different things she does at her mom and at her dad's house. I like this book because not a lot of children's books touch base on sensitive topics like divorce even though many children come from divorce parents. I would definitely read this book to kindergarten students because many times children at that age like to draw pictures of their families and this book lets them know that it's okay to come from a divorce family.

[Angela · Rating 5 out of 5]

Absolutely love this book! It talks about the difficult topic of divorce and a child having to leave at two places. It does an excellent job at stating all the positive things living at two places brings, such as experiencing the city life and the country life. Also reiterates that child loves both parents and they both love her.

I could use this book as one to either make connections and disconnects within my students.

[Oana Cerchezan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book because it gave a child's viewpoint and shared her emotions as she was describing her family. I will ask the student's about what it means to be divorced. I think this discussion is crucial because many children feel confused about what is going on in the family. They need to understand that the love that their parents have for them is still the same, even if things are different.

[Karissa Youngblood]

This is a book about living in a home situation that had been changed by divorce. The author tells a story from a little girl's perspective about he mom and dad, how her life has changed, and the worries she has about her new situation. he illustrations in the book are beautiful and the author does a wonder job explaining the worries children have about divorce. I think this is a wonderful resource for teachers and parents to have to work with children going through these types of changes

[Lucero Hernandez · Rating 3 out of 5]

This little girl goes about mentioning the many changes that she goes through when her parents divorce. She explores her uncertainties, and share what she does with each parent; however, there is one thing she will always be certain about and that is that no matter what, her parents will always love her.

[Lorraine Robinson · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is good for explaining divorce to children. It also reveals some differences between country life and city life. Can be helpful for children to understand different emotions. Also shows hoe children in single parent homes have to deal with unstable circumstances. The author did a good job expressing the feelings of a child going through divorce by showing different situations.

[Denise · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a good book for young children whose parents are divorced.