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The Jolly Regina (The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters #1)
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The Jolly Regina

(The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters #1)

3.83  ·  Rating details ·  510 ratings  ·  130 reviews
This new series features the blandest sisters who ever embarked on a rollicking, swashbuckling, and entirely unintentional adventure

In the spirit of A Series of Unfortunate Events and the Incorrigible Children of Ashton Place series, The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters will captivate middle-grade readers looking for humor, hijinks, and a swashbuckling good
Kindle Edition, 176 pages
Published January 10th 2017 by Amulet Books
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Stella Noelle William Joyce and Emily Winfield Martin both have GORGEOUS books out for babies and children!

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Average rating 3.83  · 
Rating details
 ·  510 ratings  ·  130 reviews

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Emily Brown
Mar 05, 2017 rated it really liked it
A nice little package! Like the Series of Unfortunate Events, this book is not as easy as it looks, and between the pirate slang and the old fashioned vocabulary, it might work best as a read aloud. But for precocious young readers, it tells a good yarn with humor, heart, and a touch of feminism. And the pirates illustrations reminded me of Kate Beaton!
R. G. Nairam
Aug 20, 2018 rated it really liked it
This is definitely not as deep and/or insightful as most books I rank four stars, but I think for the kind of book it is trying to be, it succeeds very well and was quite entertaining. Unlikely to have a lifetime effect on anyone, beyond simply to enjoy reading and stories--but that's a pretty noble cause in itself.
Tiffany Hough
Jan 16, 2018 rated it really liked it
You cant go wrong with a book whose main characters are named Jaundice and Kale Bland. ...more
Jan 07, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Jaundice and Kale are content with their life. They have their cheese sandwiches, enjoy watching grass grows, darn socks, and like to read Dr. Snootes Illustrated Childrens Dictionary. An unexpected knock at the door ends with the girls being kidnapped by female pirates, and forced into adventures beyond their imaginings. The question is, will the girls be able to get back home again, and will they want to?
The girls comments and reactions (they pretend to be asleep when faced with perilous
Kid Lit Reviews
Jaundice and Kale Bland live alone, taking care of each other and their home. They darn socks to pay the bills and spend free time reading from the strange dictionaryDr. Nathaniel Snootes Illustrated Childrens DictionaryKale carries everywhere. Day-to-day life in Dullsville never changes for these sisters, except for the day, several years ago, when their parents left and have yet to return. And then one day the doorbell rings. Who is it? Its a surprise, the voice calls out. Who can resist a ...more
Debbi Florence
Jan 07, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Jaundice and Kale Bland are sisters who live in Dullsville darning socks, watching the grass grow, and eating cheese sandwiches. They enjoy these things quite a bit, despite not knowing where their parents had disappeared off to for years. But one day, they are kidnapped by a band of female pirates and forced on an adventure that leads them to search for their missing parents. Full of great wit and humor, this story will enchant readers. And they will fall in love with Jaundice and Kale. I cant ...more
Abbi Waxman
Apr 20, 2017 rated it it was amazing
My 9 year old daughter and I really enjoyed this book, and immediately pre-ordered the next one. The humor works for both adults and kids, and I loved the fact that the sisters are essentially introverts thrown into an adventure. They stay true to themselves, which is a great message, while also rising to the challenge. I laughed out loud many times (a pirate called Captain Anne Tenille? Yes, please) and it's a great read-aloud. Highly recommended.
Jan 12, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Funny and smart, this book makes kids feel like they're in on the joke. I absolutely loved this book and cannot wait to see what unintentional adventures Jaundice and Kale have next!
This wasn't nearly as funny as I was hoping it would be. I think the humour may have gelled with me better if the Bland sisters had had a bit more personality and were more distinct from one another (but then that would have defeated the whole conceit of their character - their name is literally Bland!) But it was cute and fun and something I would probably recommend to reluctant younger readers.

I found the setting odd and indistinct. This is a world where pirates (of the "arr matey" variety)
Apr 09, 2017 rated it it was ok
Hmm, slightly bland? lovely premise but these girls would rather be at home darning socks, watching the grass grow, eating cheese sandwiches and reading the dictionary than off on adventures... gorgeously illustrated with some entertaining secondary characters, so I'll almost definitely be reading part 2...
May 28, 2017 rated it really liked it
I really liked the tongue in cheek word play in this book! A quick read or listen.
Jessica  Van Tassell
Feb 21, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Apparently when I am falling asleep reading I somehow managed to mark that I have read this three times. Alas I read it just the once but it was still quite enjoyable. I am so happy to learn there is another book in the series.
Note: I received an ARC of this book from the publisher at ALA Midwinter 2017.
Feb 28, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: for-the-eyes, ebook, 2017
This was fun and quick to read.
Jul 23, 2016 rated it really liked it
This book made me giggle. I'm guessing Ms. LaReau makes this into a series of some sort, but for now I'm going to enjoy thinking about the Bland sisters, reveling in eating oatmeal and watching grass grow, while occasionally thoughts of Capt Ann Tennille's piracy, Fatima's sea shanties, and books from the library of Port Innastorm creep into their dreams.
Jun 07, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: read-in-2017
"Ye never turn down a moment of serendipity. Eventually, no matter how bad things are, it all leads to somethin' - or someone - worth all the trouble."

The Bland Sisters spend their days darning socks, staring at wallpaper, watching grass grow and eating oatmeal ever since their parents "left quite suddenly to run an unspecified errand" and never came back. Jaundice, who is always serious, and Kale who gets feelings enjoy living in Dullsville and only occasionally wonder what has happened to
Katy Noyes
Mar 18, 2017 rated it really liked it
4.5 stars

A story about children who DON'T want adventures!

This isn't how it usually plays out - don't children in stories normally CRAVE adventure and thrill to the excitement of getting whisked away for hijinks and horseplay?

Not these two. Very normal, sedate girls, Jaundice and Kale Bland have been left alone by their parents (the less said about that the better...) and have a very simple and comfortable life, eating porridge, going about their mundane routines quite contentedly.

Until a knock
Apr 28, 2017 rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
-Spoiler free review-

I found this book whilst doing research for a school project, and since I want to write a story about an all-female pirate crew, I thought Id give this a read!

Obviously it is a childrens book, so it isnt exactly the kind of thing I want to write, but I thought the characters and general atmosphere were so fun and engaging. This book absolutely plays on stereotypes. This is quite a key part of childrens literature, because they can identify well known character tropes. The
Pooja Banga
This new series features the blandest sisters who ever embarked on a rollicking, swashbuckling, and entirely unintentional adventure

In the spirit of A Series of Unfortunate Events and the Incorrigible Children of Ashton Place series, The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters will captivate middle-grade readers looking for humor, hijinks, and a swashbuckling good time. Meet Jaundice and Kale Bland, two sisters who avoid excitement at any cost. Together, they patiently await the return of
Apr 04, 2018 rated it really liked it
Jaundice and Kale truly live up to their names. They prefer to stay home, eat cheese sandwiches, read from a dictionary, and darn socks. They also have very specific rules to live by. But when a mysterious voice at the door promises a surprise, they violate one of their rules and open the door to a stranger. They are repaid by being kidnapped and taken to sea by pirates. This throws off Jaundice's and Kale's routine's but they have no choice but to serve as deck hands and galley servants. They ...more
I loved this book! It is a charmingly witty tale of two "Bland" sisters, Kale and Jaundice who enjoy oatmeal, cheese snadwiches, reading the dictionary and darning socks. Although, they know they have parents, the sisters have not seen them for many years, not since they left on a sudden unspecified errand. Despite not knowing where their parents are or when they are coming back the sisters live a happy life in a nice house on the road to Dullsville, that is until one day there is an unexpected ...more
Ben Guterson
Jan 22, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This charming book somehow surmounts a seemingly fatal premise--two sisters, Jaundice and Kale Bland are excitement-averse in the extreme--to deliver a tale full of both thrills and good humor. The unflappable girls, launched on an unscripted adventure to, perhaps, locate their long-lost parents, rely on their shared resourcefulness (and a quirky illustrated dictionary that is their "main source of education") to muddle through hi-jinks with a band of lady pirates. They befriend some, antagonize ...more
Mar 27, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: for-addie, pitates
Won a copy of this book under the name The Unintentional Adventures of The Bland Sisters: The Booty Myth awhile back from Goodreads Giveaway.
Finally got around to reading it to my nearing 3yr-old daughter. Safe to say we both really enjoyed it. Its a really fun story about these two bland girls (& their Dictionary) getting swooped up in the adventures of FEMALE PIRATES! Its just great!
I may bias because the day I randomly picked it up I had to explain to my daughter that NO she didnt need to
Sep 16, 2017 rated it really liked it
Thank you Rachael Dionne for think of me. Kale and Jaundice Bland are wonderful from their cheese sandwiches to their sock daring. Everything about their life in Dullsville is perfect as long as it is full of watching the grass grow, time spent dusting and reading definitions from their beloved, Dr. Snoote's Illustrated Children's Dictionary (after all a dictionary has everything a person needs to know).

What a rude awakening when they are kidnapped by pirates and forced to swab the decks! And
Feb 04, 2018 rated it it was amazing
The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters The Jolly Regina was full of wit and humor. The Bland sisters, Jaundice and Kale, are happy to live their life avoiding any kind of adventure. When suddenly they are kidnapped by female pirates, their life becomes chock full of pirate adventure. The silliness and play on words craft the story to amuse the reader. For example, a one-legged pirate was a former librarian at the Port Innastorm library. The small illustrations scattered throughout the ...more
Nov 18, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Books are filled with adventures and emotions and ideas! The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters is one of my all-time favorite middle grade novels! My second grader and I just finished it last night. Challenging vocabulary makes it a perfect read-aloud - my daughter learned a lot of new words. A wonderful story about two sisters who definitely do not like adventure but find themselves on a pirate ship! Its full of the most clever writing and darling illustrations. Seriously, it doesnt ...more
Britt, Book Habitue
Mar 26, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Oh my gosh the puns. While this is a great adventure for kids and I'm looking forward to seeing what my 9-year-old thinks, I'm devastated that so many of the puns and jokes will fly right over her head.
I did this one half audio/half actual book. The audio has a good narrator, but the chapters aren't quite set up right... you end up getting the last line of the previous chapter, then a pause, THEN the new chapter starts. No biggie if you just listen straight through... really annoying if you have
Aug 14, 2017 rated it really liked it
Jaundice and Kale are sisters of indeterminate age living a quiet, uneventful life in Dullsville. They darn socks for a living and eat cheese sandwiches, tepid tea, and unsweetened oatmeal. Their parents left on an errand a few years back and never returned. Things might go on like this forever, until the day a knock sounds on the door, and adventure keelhauls the girls. Original and funny with great illustrations and a very unconventional cast of characters. Looking forward to adventure #2.
Mar 17, 2018 rated it really liked it
This is a beautifully written book for middle-grade kids, packed with challenging vocabulary and an interesting, if strange, premise. Two little girls (of indeterminate age, but I'd guess about 11) have been home alone for years, supporting themselves by darning socks, and receiving grocery deliveries at the curb in front of their house. They do everything they can to keep things as stable and uneventful as possible and to stay under the radar -- until one day a pirate kidnaps them and they find ...more
Kira Turner
This was a fun and quirky read that I enjoyed despite it's short length. Kale and Jaundice are endearing and it's fun to see them experience new emotions and make new friends. The strongest point for this little story, however, is that the two sisters stay true to their characters and send the message that it's okay to be a homebody. They do not change who they are or what they love to fit in with their new friends, and their new friends accept them for who they are without asking them to ...more
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Kara LaReau was born and raised in Connecticut. She received her Masters in Fine Arts in Writing, Literature, and Publishing from Emerson College in Boston, Massachusetts and later worked as an editor at Candlewick Press and at Scholastic Press. Among other celebrated titles, she edited Kate DiCamillos Because of Winn-Dixie, The Tale of Despereaux, The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane, and the ...more

Other books in the series

The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters (3 books)
  • The Uncanny Express (The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters #2)
  • Flight of the Bluebird (The Unintentional Adventures of the Bland Sisters Book 3)

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