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My Autistic Awakening: Unlocking the Potential for a Life Well Lived
Rachael Lee Harris spent her early childhood locked in an autistic fog until beginning her journey from a fragmented world to one in which things began to make sense. Rachael’s determination to take her place in society led her down many paths, from beauty therapist to Catholic nun, from mother and wife to divorcee and working mom. Today, she is a psychotherapist specializing in helping others on the Autism Spectrum.
Rachael’s story explores areas such as schooling, family relationships, employment, travel, and faith culminating in monastic life, motherhood, dating, and marriage. Through her story, we get a more “rounded” positive vision of how an autistic life can develop and insight into the benefits of being “on the spectrum” alongside the very real picture of its challenges. Addressing the culture of disability and negativity that surrounds so much of the public perception of the Autism Spectrum, Rachael presents a more moderate and perhaps more objective assessment of her own life experiences, as well as the potential for others on the Spectrum.
Rachael’s story explores areas such as schooling, family relationships, employment, travel, and faith culminating in monastic life, motherhood, dating, and marriage. Through her story, we get a more “rounded” positive vision of how an autistic life can develop and insight into the benefits of being “on the spectrum” alongside the very real picture of its challenges. Addressing the culture of disability and negativity that surrounds so much of the public perception of the Autism Spectrum, Rachael presents a more moderate and perhaps more objective assessment of her own life experiences, as well as the potential for others on the Spectrum.
232 pages, Hardcover
First published April 9, 2015
11 people are currently reading
333 people want to read
About the author
Rachael Lee Harris
4 books12 followersRachael Lee Harris is a registered psychotherapist specializing in Asperger’s Syndrome and High Functioning Autism. She provides a unique contribution to the field of Autism Spectrum Conditions (ASC) therapy and research from her perspective as a woman who has been diagnosed as being on the Autism Spectrum.
Rachael is the only psychotherapist diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome specializing in this field. From an insider’s perspective, she continues to improve the quality of children and adults on the Autism Spectrum and also their cares and partners, through her private practice, speaking engagements and retreats.
Rachael is the only psychotherapist diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome specializing in this field. From an insider’s perspective, she continues to improve the quality of children and adults on the Autism Spectrum and also their cares and partners, through her private practice, speaking engagements and retreats.
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
July 1, 2015
Rachael Lee Harris' brilliant memoir is important because she integrates her first-person life experiences with the rarely-viewed thought processes of an Asperger's mind. Her childhood was an intense autistic haze, yet she remembers details with such acuity that the pages almost turn themselves. Harris' prose is witty and insightful.
Rachael's school years were difficult and she was constantly misunderstood—no surprise, because this was twenty years before Asperger's Syndrome had been recognized. Her first grade teacher reported, "Rachael is here physically, but that is all." She vividly remembers feeling mortified when the sisters disciplined her with a leather strap in front of the whole school for not following the strict parochial school rules. Her demeanor did not indicate remorse, however; instead, she smiled and giggled, angerinhg the sisters even more. Asperger's children are often misinterpreted, because showing true emotions is difficult for them—information not known at that time.
Rachael seldom made eye contact. This was interpreted as shyness, though she was never shy. Her active imagination made her time alone much more exciting than when she was forced to socialize with her peers. Family remained her fortress throughout her youth. Her mother never doubted Rachael's ability and intelligence. The girl spent her lunch periods studying in the school library; it was the key that unlocked her future. She scored at the top of her class in English and History. Graduation was a relief. "As the school gate closed behind me, the whole world and all its possibilities opened up before me," she writes.
This chronological memoir pulls the reader through Rachael's life with a strong thread of hope. I admire the author's courageous approach to life, and her forthright style of writing. Her pragmatic perceptions lacked the emotions that at times seem to cloud the views of non-autistic people. I was surprised by some of the life choices she made. Her mettle impressed me. When she made mistakes, she blamed no one, but instead contemplated the facts, corrected her course and carried on.
Apparent throughout the memoir were her concrete thought processes and her need for routine and order, which Aspergers need in order to organize their chaotic world. Similarly, her story illustrates how difficult abstract thinking and expression has been for her.
Today Harris is a registered psychotherapist specializing in Asperger's Syndrome. She is happily married and has a son. The challenges she overcame to find the life she wanted are an inspiration. Life is not fair, yet this is a woman who feels blessed to live the life she's lived. Readers will not only gain insight into Asperger's but also feel renewed by the unique spirit of Rachael Lee Harris.
by Ann McCauley
for Story Circle Book Reviews
reviewing books by, for, and about women
Rachael's school years were difficult and she was constantly misunderstood—no surprise, because this was twenty years before Asperger's Syndrome had been recognized. Her first grade teacher reported, "Rachael is here physically, but that is all." She vividly remembers feeling mortified when the sisters disciplined her with a leather strap in front of the whole school for not following the strict parochial school rules. Her demeanor did not indicate remorse, however; instead, she smiled and giggled, angerinhg the sisters even more. Asperger's children are often misinterpreted, because showing true emotions is difficult for them—information not known at that time.
Rachael seldom made eye contact. This was interpreted as shyness, though she was never shy. Her active imagination made her time alone much more exciting than when she was forced to socialize with her peers. Family remained her fortress throughout her youth. Her mother never doubted Rachael's ability and intelligence. The girl spent her lunch periods studying in the school library; it was the key that unlocked her future. She scored at the top of her class in English and History. Graduation was a relief. "As the school gate closed behind me, the whole world and all its possibilities opened up before me," she writes.
This chronological memoir pulls the reader through Rachael's life with a strong thread of hope. I admire the author's courageous approach to life, and her forthright style of writing. Her pragmatic perceptions lacked the emotions that at times seem to cloud the views of non-autistic people. I was surprised by some of the life choices she made. Her mettle impressed me. When she made mistakes, she blamed no one, but instead contemplated the facts, corrected her course and carried on.
Apparent throughout the memoir were her concrete thought processes and her need for routine and order, which Aspergers need in order to organize their chaotic world. Similarly, her story illustrates how difficult abstract thinking and expression has been for her.
Today Harris is a registered psychotherapist specializing in Asperger's Syndrome. She is happily married and has a son. The challenges she overcame to find the life she wanted are an inspiration. Life is not fair, yet this is a woman who feels blessed to live the life she's lived. Readers will not only gain insight into Asperger's but also feel renewed by the unique spirit of Rachael Lee Harris.
by Ann McCauley
for Story Circle Book Reviews
reviewing books by, for, and about women
April 2, 2019
I almost didn't finish this book because the writing in the beginning is a bit stiff, but I soldiered on, and I fell in love with the middle section where Rachael goes off to the monastery -- and throughout, the somewhat old-fashioned language is well-suited to Rachael's personality and interests.
I especially loved some of her observations, like:
"Many children on the autism spectrum have unusual sensory sensitivities, and as a young child I was no exception. Like Alice, whatever I ate, whatever I drink, became a risky undertaking with no certain outcome. The daily ritual of eating breakfast became for me a game of Russian roulette. Some mornings I ate my cereal and toast without incident. Other mornings, the roof of my mouth would start to tingle as I finished the last morsel. This tingling sensation heralded the worst nausea I've ever had to endure. At its peak, wave after wave would wash over me for up to two hours at a time. As I stood pale and overcome in the middle of the playground, I often wondered how other children managed to bear it. It never once occurred to me that they weren't experiencing life in the same way as I did. I could only marvel at their resilience, and despair at my lack." (p. 20)
"Aware as I am that the term 'Asperger's syndrome' has dropped out of use in the American diagnostic classification of autism spectrum conditions, nevertheless I cling, rather doggedly I admit, to this term. Human beings are in the business of categorizing everything with which they come into contact, and I am no different in this regard. For those of us diagnosed under this title, it is a familiar term and a distinction that I feel is helpful in pinpointing where we stand on the spectrum.
Within the autism spectrum there is a broad range of capabilities. And because the spectrum is so broad, we with Asperger's syndrome must not lose sight of the hardships of those struggling with classic autism--for we are their voice!"(p. 198)
And:
"Our capacity 'to turn away from the everyday world,' as Hans Asperger put it, is not one of shunning the social milieu; it is the expression of a mind caught up in the love of detail. People with Asperger's syndrome, are the Observers par excellence, many making of their powers of observation a lifetime's work. Many of these solitary figures, rather than being isolates, have become, for multitudes, a rallying point, and their discoveries and creativity have shaped the world in which we live--for the better.
Some historical figures for whom the Asperger template fits like a glove include Jane Austen, Emily Dickinson, Marie Curie, and Carl Jung ...." (p. 198)
And not least her conclusion:
"No one would deny the challenges faced by those on the autism spectrum, but I believe that the quality of my life is richer and deeper for the unique perspective that Asperger's syndrome has graced me with, and I wouldn't swap my genetic inheritance for anything– How could I? I was wired for wonder, and autism was not the lock, but the key!" (p. 204)
I especially loved some of her observations, like:
"Many children on the autism spectrum have unusual sensory sensitivities, and as a young child I was no exception. Like Alice, whatever I ate, whatever I drink, became a risky undertaking with no certain outcome. The daily ritual of eating breakfast became for me a game of Russian roulette. Some mornings I ate my cereal and toast without incident. Other mornings, the roof of my mouth would start to tingle as I finished the last morsel. This tingling sensation heralded the worst nausea I've ever had to endure. At its peak, wave after wave would wash over me for up to two hours at a time. As I stood pale and overcome in the middle of the playground, I often wondered how other children managed to bear it. It never once occurred to me that they weren't experiencing life in the same way as I did. I could only marvel at their resilience, and despair at my lack." (p. 20)
"Aware as I am that the term 'Asperger's syndrome' has dropped out of use in the American diagnostic classification of autism spectrum conditions, nevertheless I cling, rather doggedly I admit, to this term. Human beings are in the business of categorizing everything with which they come into contact, and I am no different in this regard. For those of us diagnosed under this title, it is a familiar term and a distinction that I feel is helpful in pinpointing where we stand on the spectrum.
Within the autism spectrum there is a broad range of capabilities. And because the spectrum is so broad, we with Asperger's syndrome must not lose sight of the hardships of those struggling with classic autism--for we are their voice!"(p. 198)
And:
"Our capacity 'to turn away from the everyday world,' as Hans Asperger put it, is not one of shunning the social milieu; it is the expression of a mind caught up in the love of detail. People with Asperger's syndrome, are the Observers par excellence, many making of their powers of observation a lifetime's work. Many of these solitary figures, rather than being isolates, have become, for multitudes, a rallying point, and their discoveries and creativity have shaped the world in which we live--for the better.
Some historical figures for whom the Asperger template fits like a glove include Jane Austen, Emily Dickinson, Marie Curie, and Carl Jung ...." (p. 198)
And not least her conclusion:
"No one would deny the challenges faced by those on the autism spectrum, but I believe that the quality of my life is richer and deeper for the unique perspective that Asperger's syndrome has graced me with, and I wouldn't swap my genetic inheritance for anything– How could I? I was wired for wonder, and autism was not the lock, but the key!" (p. 204)
July 6, 2018
A wonderful story of self realization and acceptance. As Rachael Harris says, "In losing myself in its hidden life, I found myself; in embracing silence, I found my voice; in seeking solitude, I became connected to all; in enduring anxiety, I was restored to peace and in every moment was met by God's grace.
October 25, 2018
One of my favourite memoirs on the subject of life with autism, with a spiritual seeker theme as well. Written with warmth, wit, compassion and intelligence. Rachael's story inspired me as she moved through her various stages of life and I found myself constantly admiring her writing style and unique and humourous outlook on life. I couldn't put it down.
August 8, 2022
Some truly unfortunate attachment to the term “Asperger’s” despite its namesake being a literal Nazi who decided which autistic kids were worthy of living and which weren’t.
February 28, 2019
Such a precious mirror-pool to quench my thirst for understanding and to be understood. I devoured this book inside of twenty-four hours and did not want it to end. At one point in this autobiography, the author writes, “Never before had I read the life of someone whose story echoed so much of my own...the familiarity lay in a quality of perception and temperament.” This was certainly the case for me with this book, and, much to my delight, the familiarity was also woven through with small, uncannily parallel details.
The author’s sensitivity, empathy, light, depth of soul and wonderful ability to articulate her experiences comforted and inspired me. I love how her writing style opens up and flows more as the book progresses. Reading this chronological unfolding of herself, I subtly felt her growing confidence, maturity and self-acceptance. Also, for any and all, the last two chapters are a profoundly beneficial discussion of what Aspergers really is and is not, and the beauty of neurodiversity.
The author’s sensitivity, empathy, light, depth of soul and wonderful ability to articulate her experiences comforted and inspired me. I love how her writing style opens up and flows more as the book progresses. Reading this chronological unfolding of herself, I subtly felt her growing confidence, maturity and self-acceptance. Also, for any and all, the last two chapters are a profoundly beneficial discussion of what Aspergers really is and is not, and the beauty of neurodiversity.
September 11, 2024
I discovered this book while looking for something to read for a psychology class, and I am glad I picked it up. This is a compelling autobiography about the joys and challenges of living life with autism. We follow Rachael through her varied experiences, as she grows from a confused and isolated child to a wise and compassionate woman. Although Rachael spends much of her life undiagnosed, she is fortunate have a loving and supportive family. Rachael's strong religious faith permeates the book, and she clearly believes God had a hand in her life. Overall, she is more grateful for the advantages autism has given her than she is resentful of the struggles.
This book has vivid, descriptive writing and gives a good overview of the author's life without being too long. It would be worth reading for anyone who wants to gain insight into life with a neurodivergent mind, or just wants to read about someone with an interesting story.
This book has vivid, descriptive writing and gives a good overview of the author's life without being too long. It would be worth reading for anyone who wants to gain insight into life with a neurodivergent mind, or just wants to read about someone with an interesting story.
March 3, 2016
This book is interesting because the author did not find out she was on the autism spectrum until her son was diagnosed. It certainly explained a lot for her. Her writing style is not exceptionally interesting, but the information definitely is. She has been able to succeed in helping others. It takes place in Australia.
April 24, 2017
Great book.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews