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You Don't Have to Like Me: Essays on Growing Up, Speaking Out, and Finding Feminism
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You Don't Have to Like Me: Essays on Growing Up, Speaking Out, and Finding Feminism

3.89  ·  Rating details ·  1,488 ratings  ·  210 reviews
The author of Don’t Worry It Gets Worse takes on the F-word

Alida Nugent’s first book, Don’t Worry It Gets Worse, received terrific reviews, and her self-deprecating “everygirl” approach continues to win the Internet-savvy writer and blogger new fans. Now, she takes on one of today’s hottest cultural topics: feminism.

Nugent is a proud feminist—and she’s not afraid to say
Paperback, 218 pages
Published October 20th 2015 by Plume
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3.89  · 
Rating details
 ·  1,488 ratings  ·  210 reviews

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Brittany (UnderTheRadarBooks)
Nov 30, 2015 rated it really liked it
Shelves: library, 2015
This book is important. It is important because it talks about so many issues and situations that women are scared to talk about. Even though there were essays that didn't directly speak to me I know they speak to someone out there. Someone who needs to hear these things. Someone who needs to know they are not alone. If feminism is something you are interested in, pick this book up. You just might learn something.
Nov 27, 2015 rated it liked it
Although it's preaching to the choir in my case, this book would be a good jumping off point for anyone in your life who isn't a feminist because they're "the mother of a son and married to a man" or because "the idea of ‘raise women to power, take the men away from the power’ is never going to work out because you need balance" or who thinks feminism is some sort of intolerant worldview or prefers the term "humanist" or has used the hashtag #womenagainstfeminism. I know it's easy to think that ...more
Sep 15, 2015 rated it it was ok
This wasn't bad, per se- thus the "it was ok" star rating. There were a few lines that I thought were great, such as the following:

"Going on a porn site as a woman is also like going to a crap retail store and being plus-sized: here's a tiny section devoted to you that has nothing you like. Good luck! We hate you!" p 205

"Never once do they consider that I might not want to be bought, and that I am not a cow at all." p 141

I guess there were just a few too many topics that while I'm glad she suppo
Jane (It'sJaneLindsey)
Nov 29, 2017 rated it liked it
Shelves: 2017-read
3.5 stars
juicy brained intellectual
Nov 16, 2015 rated it did not like it
Shelves: do-not-own
had i seen the blurb from bust claiming this is ~~relatable~~ i probably wouldn't've picked it up at the library. however, i did not because i pick books at random and read nothing about them, not even the back covers. it is a bad habit. if a book is bright enough or shiny enough or adjective enough, i will think to myself, hm, ok, i will try this. what can go wrong? nothing, really, except i just spent like, parts of a whole day reading stuff i would have read on tumblr in 2009. maybe i would h ...more
Guts Reads
Four pages on Mac Cyber lipstick.
Oct 02, 2015 rated it liked it
A very quick read with some laughs and a good amount of "ugh, I KNOW" and "tell it, girl" moments. If you occasionally enjoy immersing yourself in a good feisty Jezebel comment thread, you would probably enjoy this. Several of the sections (especially those on dieting and body image) would have been great for high school or college me.
Nov 04, 2017 rated it liked it
3.5 stars

I feel like this is great point to start if you want to read about feminism, but having read many other essays & books on the topic I also have read better.
Jessica Jeffers
This isn't exactly ground-breaking work, but it's an excellent Feminism 101 primer for young Millennials.
There was not one single dud in this collection of feminist essays. It's full of heart, as well as humor, and it's just everything I want in a non-navel gazing collection of discovering and embracing one's feminism. Highly recommended and especially appealing to 20somethings figuring out their shit.

Alida notes she's imperfect, that it took her a long time to come into her own, and her own self-awareness in this collection is a feature, not a flaw.
May 17, 2017 rated it liked it
(2.5) I'll be honest, this book didn't do a whole lot for me. I picked it up based on positive reviews, and while I found her style very easy to read and her subject matter pretty engaging, the content was lacking. The book opens with a primer on why Nugent became a feminist and outlines the pitfalls of navigating feminism in a vaguely ingratiating style that seems more appropriate for a Huffington Post blog article or a Buzzfeed listicle. The rest of the essays tackle all the hot "feminist topi ...more
Beth (fuelled by fiction)
Feb 08, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Danika at The Lesbrary
Jun 16, 2016 rated it liked it
Shelves: non-lesbian
This was an enjoyable read, but it focuses on a presentation of being a woman that I did not relate to at all (straight and stereotypically feminine). Which is fine, it's just not me. Though she does sometimes acknowledge queer women, the framework is really around the experience of straight women.

I also find it funny when books like this try to convince you to be a feminist. I feel like 95% of the people picking up a book on finding feminism are already feminist.

This would be a good book to giv
Nov 30, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Was it incredibly profound? No, but I'm a feminist who reads a lot of essays very much like these. To someone newer to feminist ideas, this is a great introduction. I'd give the content four stars.

The writing, though? Incredible. Pushed it over to a hefty 5 star rating. I almost NEVER audibly laugh when reading, and there were many times I had to stifle my snickering on the subway to appear somewhat normal.
Oct 24, 2016 rated it did not like it
Shelves: quit-reading
Ugh. I just couldn't make myself keep reading this one. It's like Nugent's goal is for everyone to associate feminism with being vulgar and crude. I thought it would be an interesting book especially because of the title, but I just couldn't make myself read anymore. Don't waste your time on this one.
Ciara (Lost at Midnight)

Not a single essay in this collection I didn't love. Laughed out loud MANY times and connected to so much Nugent had to say. It's short and powerful and if you are a young woman you need this book on your radar. (Really, if you're a person you need this book on your radar because it is wonderful).
Dec 15, 2015 rated it did not like it
When she grows up about 10 years and reads about intersectional feminism and, you know, maybe learns anything about the world outside of Connecticut and Brooklyn, I'll be interested in reading her work. Until then, I'm a little too grown and a little too woke to deal with this fluff.
Kailee Davis
Sep 22, 2015 rated it really liked it
I love Alida's voice; this was a good, funny follow-up to her first book.
Erica Young
Feb 19, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This is one of the best essay books I've ever read: It's so easily relatable and explains feminism in a way that is inclusive and exciting. Sometimes it's easy to sound like a broken record when trying to relay topics on feminism, and I found Nugent's writing to be fresh and clear, not to mention absolutely hilarious. I would read a line on the train and bust out laughing; it felt just like I was having a conversation with my close friend. This is a great book for younger people trying to decide ...more
Katie Jo
Jul 18, 2017 rated it liked it
I had some criticisms for this book that I reconsidered after remembering that I found it in "Humor" rather than "Cultural Studies". I don't know if that is where the author intended for it to be shelved, but that is where I found it.

This was definitely much funnier than most "feminist humor" I've read, which is saying both a lot and not much. Meaning that I rarely find books like that funny because more often than not they seem to be trying extremely hard. It's not that I don't find women funn
Dec 03, 2017 rated it liked it
I have mixed feelings about this book. The first essay was great! It made me want to run out and buy this book for all my favorite girlfriends. Then I hit the middle and I hated the book. The essay about how the author used to dislike women but now they are her friends and she never calls them sluts anymore was pretty terrible. (By the way, she calls women “sluts” about 5 more time before the book is over.) Then the book got good again- “all the diets I’ve been on” and “advice I’ve received” whe ...more
Nov 21, 2017 rated it it was ok
I would say 40% of this book was incredibly well thought out and empowering and a great perspective, but the other 60% was about dieting and particularly irrelevant food disorder, which absolutely detracted from everything else.
Gemma Montfort
May 31, 2017 rated it it was ok
If you want to read a funny book about feminism it is better to read Caitlin Moran than this.
Sep 14, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: non-fiction, essays
Funny with moments of "ah ha" I wish more people would recognize.
Addison Curry
Feb 15, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Everybody read this. Seriously, just do it.
Elizabeth Smart
Jan 04, 2019 rated it liked it
A lovely feminism starter kit. Not especially useful for me in 2019, but hopefully useful for someone else. Ah, 2015... a simpler time.
Sep 10, 2015 rated it liked it
Shelves: first-reads
I received a free copy of this book from Penguin First to Read in exchange for an honest review.

The author talks about feminism, and what it isn't, and describes how she came to be a feminist herself. Mostly, this covers make-up as a way of fitting in or making yourself happy; relationships with men and friendships with women; and food, diets, and eating disorders. Some of her stories are a little sad, and others are a bit funny. For the most part, I had a difficult time connecting with the auth
Ashley Holstrom
This book is important and told through the eyes of a sassy 20something who knows she's made mistakes, and will keep making mistakes, on her way to finding feminism. Every essay resonated with me and my own path to feminism — and likely does for every other young woman who reads this.

Nugent’s voice is excellent, and she puts to words the things women deal with every day that we maybe don’t even think about. Like comments from older women about our bodies and our makeup and our hair and our lack
Dec 29, 2016 rated it it was amazing
Great comedic timing, even better insight! Although I do not personally know Alissa Nugent, a giant shame, I felt very connected to her anecdotes and imagined my best friend narrating this to me!

I am a sucker for personal experience essays, and I very much enjoyed Nugent's phrasing! Made me feel less like I was being lectured, and like I actually learned something!

I also loved that she named another author I look up to: Roxane Gay!

I highly encourage any one who is curious about feminism to pic
Rachael Conrad
Mar 22, 2016 rated it really liked it
You Don't Have To Like Me is a wonderful collection of essays on the power of the F-word (feminism) and what it means to be a woman. Whether she's writing about the trials and tribulations of being a twenty-something in New York City, growing up in a bi-racial family, or the importance of female friendships (and they are very important), Alida Nugent never misses a beat. She's smart, and sarcastic, and hers is a voice that I believe all twenty-somethings, especially young women, should hear and ...more
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Freelance writer working on turning her first book into a television show with ABC Studios. She loves to write about beauty products, food, fashion, feminism, television, and anything with an angle of humor.

She's the writer behind, a popular blog for women, for four years.
“WANTING to be anything is the whole point of feminism. HAVING TO BE SOMETHING is what feminists fight against, or at least the ones I know.” 8 likes
“Fitting in" is one of those horrible diseases that turn reasonable minds into sheep-gelatin hive minds.” 6 likes
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