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My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory

4.07  ·  Rating details ·  96 ratings  ·  18 reviews
Beginning on a first date with a couple of swingers, followed by working through social anxiety and shyness, recognizing the importance of touch in life, evolving feelings about love and expectations, having threesomes, orgies, and prostate orgasms, going through a divorce, and leveling up in life and sexuality.

For six years, Cooper S. Beckett has written for Life on the S
Paperback, 364 pages
Published January 12th 2015 by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform (first published January 6th 2015)
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Average rating 4.07  · 
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 ·  96 ratings  ·  18 reviews

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Sex books that address non-monogamy tend to be written by women or, a much smaller subset, by gay men. That's not a judgement, but it does mean that the perspective of heterosexual men tends to be under-represented, so this book fills a gap of sorts in the literature, even if Cooper identifies as Kinsey-scale 2 bisexual.

Kudos to Cooper for putting his neurotic self out there as an imperfect human example, and not in a dweeb-to-Charles-Atlas sort of way (which is kind of Daniel Stern's approach i
Bobbie Morgan
Apr 21, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Cooper Beckett shared this book with me in order to write a story (not a review) about it and the swinging lifestyle. I hadn't planned on reading the entire book nor am I personally interested in swinging or non-monogamy, but I gobbled it up! Cooper provides an excellent first-person account of his experiences in swinging and non-monogamy and provides a lot of excellent advice ... even through some lessons he learned the hard way. I highly recommend this book to any couple looking into swinging ...more
Shawn Coleman
Jan 31, 2015 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book was an honest, heart-felt account of Cooper's experiences with non-monogamy and with life. He openly shares his low points with the same degree of authenticity as his high points. That is what makes this book universally relatable. We all have those moments of doubt, of unexpected courage, and of excitement. Unfortunately, we don't all discuss them, so many of us feel alone. This book left me feeling seen and connected in a way that no book ever has in the past. I am forever grateful t ...more
Feb 08, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Very thought provoking and discusses many concepts and concerns to consider balancing polyamory and swinging or open relationship issues.
Daniel Thibault
It was a good read, Interesting choice of lifestyle!
Aug 13, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
An honest, personal and often funny set of great essays and insights on open sexuality and polyamory. I’ve read a number of great books on the topic, and this is right up there with “Opening Up” and “The Ethical Slut” in terms of giving readers the language and tools to become more aware, empowered and responsible as they explore this fascinating and rewarding alternative lifestyle. Cooper’s voice, tone and humor are a very welcome open hand and heart.
Joli Hamilton
Dec 28, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Personal and informational look at what one person's experience swinging has felt like... probably more helpful than it sounds because as Cooper points out, a newbie is wondering "How does this work?!?!" Sometimes the best information is just listening to another's story. Listen to this one- his narration style is adorable and engaging. ...more
Feb 17, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: audiobook
I started listening to Life on the Swingset back in 2011. Unfortunately, I fell out of the habit at the beginning of 2013. A few weeks ago, I picked it up again. I was very pleased to hear that Cooper had written a book. I quickly downloaded the podcast version. I'd only listened to 3 episodes before I decided I needed the whole book and restarted my Audible subscription just to get it. I have always loved Cooper's sexy voice. And his writing is always witty and engrossing. While I am not a swin ...more
Kristina Moses
It was just ok. I was disappointed with how little it talked about polyamory and other relationships. As a poly women (who mostly dates girls) I didn't find much of his anecdotes about being a male swinger helpful. I ended up skimming about half of it. One of the things I did like though was his comparison of asking someone out to Schrodinger's cat. There are three options: "1. She says yes and you get to the next phase. 2. She says no and you don't get to the next phase 3. You don't ask and you ...more
Rachel Kramer Bussel
If you've ever wondered what swinging was all about, look no further than My Life on the Swingset. No, it's not a how to guide, though no matter what your background, you're likely to learn something. Instead, it's a collection of vivid, honest, humorous and approachable essays on everything from Beckett's first date as a swinging couple to jealousy, orgies, prostate orgasms and other topics. It's refreshing to see a male memoir about sex that's wiling to reveal lust, nervousness, geekiness and ...more
Sep 29, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I absolutely loved this book. It's all written in first person book about one man's journey into the world of non-monogamy, about opening up his marriage, going through swinging and ending up digging into polyamory. It's personal, touching, witty and funny. At the same time hugely educational. I love Cooper's writing! This book is divided into small essays, and you can just read a couple of pages a day, or just gulp it all in one day. ...more
Nov 10, 2015 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A good read, especially for those thinking about opening up their relationships. I enjoyed the casual voice Beckett uses in his essays, which makes sense, especially considering how he wrote them, but what was missing was a bit more of the story of who, what, where, when. By the end of the book, I was feeling the essays were becoming a bit repetitive, but I enjoyed the book overall.
May 09, 2016 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Nerdy and hilarious.
Sam Elmquist
Jun 30, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I quite enjoyed this look into the world of swinging and polyamory. Cooper is raw and open in sharing his experiences. A good listening experience (audiobook is read by the author).
Misty Albaugh
Oct 01, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
After reading, well listening to, his two fictional (audio)books, I had to listen to the non fictional one just to hear to his voice a little longer. The content was good too. It’s interesting reading & learning about other lifestyles.
I liked that he suggested “Opening Up” by Tristan Taormino in his book. That’s why it took me so long to read it, because he mentioned another book & said if I hadn’t read that one, to stop reading his & go do so. I did. It was worth it.
I got quite a few laughs
Franco Bolli
I loved reading this. It is fun and never boring. You'll find wisdom, humor, self-relativism, good first-person information, and tips about swinging and poly.

Oct 03, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Honest and insightful
A great anthology of Cooper’s writing from the blog of On the Swingset (and some new stuff)! I felt like I had sat down to listen to some personal advice from someone with a lot of experience in the ethically non-monogamous lifestyle. Well-written and engaging, as well as informative.
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As a queer non-monogamous writer, Cooper S. Beckett endeavors to create characters that reflect the diverse lifestyles of his friends, his partners, and himself. From that mandate, he writes scary, silly, and sexy books and essays. Beginning his writing career as a podcaster and speaker in the sexuality education community, he wrote My Life on the Swingset, a memoir of his first five years in non- ...more

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