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Codependency: Healing the Rough Spots: Self-Loathing to Self-Acceptance

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You’ve spent your life being the “strong one.”
But somewhere beneath the rescuing, fixing, and pleasing—behind the overgiving, overthinking, and never feeling like you’re enough—your voice disappeared. Healing the Hard Part is your invitation to reclaim it.

More than a self-help book, this is a guided journey into the heart of codependency—where the pain began, how the patterns formed, and what it truly takes to break free. Compassionate, practical, and deeply trauma-informed, this book turns the focus from managing toxic relationships to healing the parts of you that needed them in the first place.

In these pages, you’ll

Why codependency is not just “needing someone too much” but a complex trauma adaptation rooted in childhood survival

The difference between love and trauma bonding—and how to recognize it in real time

Why shame and self-abandonment run deep, and how to heal them without losing your tenderness

How unhealthy loyalty, over-attachment, and rescue dynamics play out in your relationships

The truth about boundary fatigue, emotional enmeshment, and “helping that harms”

The neuroscience of self-worth—why your brain fights change even when your heart longs for freedom

Tools for detaching with dignity, rebuilding trust with yourself, and navigating grief when you let go

What makes this book different?
This is not a survival manual—it’s a transformation manual. Written by a therapist who has lived and healed this journey, the pages unfold like a conversation with someone who sees the pain behind the patterns and honors both. With powerful stories, reflective prompts, and step-by-step guidance, you’ll move from self-forgetting to sacred self-honoring.

Each chapter includes a Healing Space

Guided journal prompts

Shame-breaking affirmations

Nervous system grounding exercises

Trauma-informed insights

Practical steps for healthy connection and emotional safety

Whether you’re just beginning to see the pattern, reeling from a painful breakup, or tired of losing yourself in every relationship, this book is for you. It’s time to learn the art of loving without losing yourself—of being kind without being consumed.

Because the hard part is not letting go of them.
It’s learning to hold on to you.

This book is ideal for anyone healing

Narcissistic relationships

Childhood emotional neglect

Rescue roles and people-pleasing

Attachment trauma

Repeated love cycles that leave you empty

If you've ever whispered, “Why do I do this to myself?” — this is your answer. And your invitation to rise.

💛 Healing the hard part doesn't start with them. It starts with you.



508 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 17, 2025

1 person want to read

About the author

Raina Shepard

40 books2 followers
Author Biography — Raina Shepard

Raina Shepard is a trauma-informed writer, counselor, and storyteller whose work blends emotional honesty, lived experience, and deep spiritual insight. For more than two decades, she has walked beside individuals and families facing some of life’s hardest roads—addiction, grief, trauma, identity loss, and the quiet battles no one else sees. Her books are known for their raw truth, tender compassion, and the belief that healing is not only possible, but holy.

Surviving a childhood marked by abuse, medical trauma, and generational pain, Raina learned early what it meant to fight for hope. As an adult, she spent years counseling high-risk youth, broken families, and individuals navigating crisis. Her experiences—personal and professional—shape every story she writes. From mystic healing explorations to children’s emotional-literacy books, from codependency recovery to spiritual memoir, her voice stays rooted in resilience, grace, and the quiet presence of God.

Raina is the author of more than forty books, including Angels, Healing & Purpose, The Hard Road Home, Surviving the Teenage Fallout, Ellie’s Day of Feelings, Love Without Swords, Boomerang, and The Mystic Recovery Series. She writes under her own imprint, Shepard Publishing, and continues to build resources for readers seeking emotional recovery, spiritual clarity, and the courage to reclaim their lives.

Whether writing for adults, teens, or children, Raina’s purpose remains the same: to illuminate the path forward for anyone who has ever felt lost in their pain—and to remind them that grace always finds a way home.

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