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Friend & Foe: When to Cooperate, When to Compete, and How to Succeed at Both
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Friend & Foe: When to Cooperate, When to Compete, and How to Succeed at Both

3.89  ·  Rating details ·  660 ratings  ·  73 reviews
What does it take to succeed? This question has fueled a long-running debate. Some have argued that humans are fundamentally competitive, and that pursuing self-interest is the best way to get ahead. Others claim that humans are born to cooperate and that we are most successful when we collaborate with others.

In FRIEND AND FOE, researchers Galinsky and Schweitzer explain
Hardcover, 320 pages
Published September 29th 2015 by Crown Business (first published March 27th 2014)
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Average rating 3.89  · 
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Raeden Zen
Jan 08, 2017 rated it really liked it
The beginning and the end are the most interesting parts of this one. Overall very interesting and a pleasure to read.
Kevin Eikenberry
Oct 02, 2015 rated it it was amazing
This is a brand new book with an intriguing title from two accomplished professors at highly respected institutions.

The title and recency might be leaning you in favor of purchasing this book. The third fact might not.

If you are worried that this book is stuffy or academic, fear not. Rather, the depth of knowledge of these authors and the expert use of both their research and the research of others makes this book interesting, readable and valuable.

While the book has just been released, I was se
Jon Jachimowicz
Sep 28, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Imagine going to to an orchestra performance. You are really looking forward to this occasion, as you have heard great things about the performers and the music they will be performing. But as the first notes start playing, you realise something is off. The music is discordant, uncoordinated even, and the whole audience is in a state of confusion. Disgruntled and frustrated, you leave the performance at half-time, having learned no more than before you got there.

For anyone wanting to learn abou
Athan Tolis
Dec 31, 2015 rated it really liked it
I went to school with Adam.

So I recognized his John Lennon glasses under the title of the book, which did not make it to the cover but are quite prominent under the words “Friend and Foe” once you’ve opened the book.

And I recognized Adam in the book: it’s smart, but there’s an undertone of “I’m smarter than you” to it, which is how I remember the author. While probably true, it can grate.

Also, often it isn’t all that terribly smart. Example: George W Bush is credited with the skill of making pe
Courtney Jadevaia
Sep 21, 2015 rated it liked it
There were a lot of points in this book and statistics that I felt were really interesting. I actually learned a good amount. The one problem I had was that it felt a bit repetitive like there was more book than there was info. But definitely an interesting read and good break book from YA.
 Charlie - A Reading Machine
Started with promise but I found the real world comparisons that were constantly referred to distracting and un related. I understood the premises being initiated by the writers and felt frustrated that each one had to be accompanied by an explanation that was suited to a child.
Eric Levy
Oct 07, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Outstanding book! Galinsky and Schweitzer examine the cooperative and competitive aspects of such topics as social comparison, gender, hierarchy, trust, perspective-taking, order effects, etc. The book draws heavily on up-to-date research in management and psychology; I recognized many articles that were published in JPSP in 2014-15 here. Book is written in a colloquial style for the non-expert, but the book is completely evidence-based, and never dumbs anything down (like other books in this ge ...more
Amy Cuddy
Dec 26, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Outstanding review of the psychology of power, powerlessness, competition, and cooperation. Engaging, fast, and written by two of THE experts on the psychology of power.
Oct 01, 2015 rated it it was amazing
This book applies cutting-edge science to real-life situations faced by people pursuing their careers and their dreams. If you’ve ever felt like you don’t understand when or how to push for what you want, this book is for you. And if you’ve ever been told you don’t work well with others, this book is for you.

It has something for everyone because it sees through a false dichotomy: that only those who crush others will really achieve their dreams, or that the way to happiness is to make sure that
May 16, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Many important topics discussed in a friendly way. Loved it!
The name is important: interesting aspect of how to embrace nick names and turn the meaning in our favor! Good!
Scott Wozniak
Oct 31, 2015 rated it really liked it
This is a solid book, with practical tips on how cooperation and competition alternate in our lives. In fact, they show how we alternate between these modes in each of our relationships. And more importantly they show what triggers us to adopt one posture or the other.

It covers things like how to apologize, whether to make the first offer in a negotiation, why our peers are most upset by our success, and why making mistakes and being competent is the best combo.

Warning: these guys have no prob
Mar 25, 2016 rated it liked it
Shelves: 2016
Very interesting examination of the power dynamics behind a range of interactions and when to use competitive vs. cooperative tactics to optimize outcomes. Topics include hierarchies, gender, titles, apologies and vulnerability, trust, and the importance of rank/order of presentation of contenders in competitions and elections. Adam Galinsky strikes a good balance of presenting academic research and offering practical, actionable tips.
Dan Connors
Mar 25, 2019 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: 2019-books
This is a great book about social psychology and why we choose to cooperate sometimes and compete others. Each chapter has great examples, fascinating studies, and concludes with advice on how to find the sweet spot between competition and cooperation.
The book covers things such as trust and cheating, hierarchies and power, mimicry, negotiations, the power of names, the double bind that powerful women face, and how to ask for what you want.
Highly recommended.
Oct 07, 2015 rated it it was amazing
This book grabbed my attention from page one and never let go. Galinsky and Schweitzer's compelling insights and captivating writing truly brought the research to life. Fascinating takeaways and techniques are packed throughout and are thankfully delivered in innovative and exciting ways. I would absolutely recommend Friend and Foe to all readers. ...more
Aug 09, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Very helpful book. A must read and bedside keeper. I love it and will recommend it to every one of my friends. Book won courtesy of Goodreads Giveaway.
Kathy Cowie
My review will appear in the Jan/Feb 2016 issue of Global Business and Organizational a Excellence
Michael Belcher
Jan 28, 2016 rated it it was ok
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
May 25, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Every useful book to improve the way we handle human interaction. Easy and fun to read. Don't remember who recommended me, but thanks. ...more
Chris Esposo
A decent read on the various scenarios where it makes sense to negotiate, and when it may not, as well as everything in between. The stuff in between includes ways to successfully cooperate given assumptions of information, predisposition, scenario etc. Unfortunately, I found a lot of the material to be forgettable or obvious, making it less useful for someone who wants to up their game in real life business negotiations.

The book is not technical at all, and approaches the subject via case analy
Hassan Rezaei
Apr 06, 2020 rated it it was amazing
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Feb 05, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This is a fascinating book about how humans have evolved to be both friend and foe. That is why there is brotherly love but yet also sibling rivalry. We could have friends that support us in need but they could also be the reasons why we strive to earn more, buy more, or do more - as we compete to outdo our friends. The book provides research and guidance on balancing these two forces. There are also interesting examples of friend/foe relationships. For example, star athletes on a team are compe ...more
Nov 21, 2020 rated it liked it
This book is more about two valued orientations like Good and Bad, Friend and Foe, Trust and Cheat...
It is quite interesting because it has discussed the research of most of the Economic Behaviour.
It will be a casual read if you have read many books on Behavioural Economics. But still you are never going to get disappointed
I loved it because it refreshes my memory on such analyses.
The interesting thing is the placement of chapters like "It's good to be a King...until it isn't" and ending when ne
Bill Pritchard
Oct 17, 2017 rated it really liked it
4.0 stars. Friend & Foe has been on my reading list for almost 2 years. I found many points in this very easy to read book where I found myself going back and re-reading... and saying wow. I do not consider myself a good negotiator (ask my wife :-)) so I hoped that this book would be helpful for knowing when I needed to step in and when I could step back. My hopes were realized. :-) Suggested for the business minded among you.
Annie Wilson
Feb 13, 2020 rated it liked it
As far as pop psych books go, this one is pretty good - it’s fairly comprehensive and offers a lot of both interesting and useful information. However, for people who know the competition/cooperation and negotiations literature, I’m not sure this book offers much more than a survey of the literature - but if you don’t know it, I think reading this book would be a very efficient way of getting a general understanding of it.
Mijael Feldman
Dec 30, 2018 rated it really liked it
Fun book with lots of examples and studies that support the authors ideas and thesis. Unfortunately, the book is redundant in many parts, specially in the middle. Beginning and end of the book are the best parts and keep you hooked.

As a startup CEO and in charge of b2b sales, it gave me a couple of good ideas to improve my pricing strategy and how to improve my negotiating skills.
Mar 27, 2018 rated it it was ok
Shelves: philosophy
Sort of interesting assembly of real life stories and anecdotes that loosely follow the title, but apart from that, the book offers nothing new or eye-opening. It was too repetitive and could easily be adapted into an article.
anna b
Sep 16, 2018 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2018
Not exactly all about tips for succeeding at the workplace by creating a zero-sum situation but more about navigating around situations to your advantage. It's a great read with topics on power, gender, relationships, anchoring, and all those mind stuff which you may or may not have read. ...more
Eden Ratcliffe
Jan 06, 2020 rated it it was ok
Shelves: audiobooks
I wanted to like this book, but it went off course in the middle. It wasn’t until the end that it even began to talk about anything about negotiations. It’s not that the book was bad, it was just that for most of the book it really tie back into what it was supposed to be talking about...
Dec 03, 2020 rated it it was amazing
It was a really good read for me. The book is an easy read but take no mistake, the opinions inside are very practical and valuable.
To me, the negotiations and gender equality parts were the section I learned a lot from. I hope I can continue to use them throughout my professional life.
David Pulliam
May 21, 2018 rated it liked it
Largely disappointed because much of it I have heard before and/or it is based on anecdotes or poor connection between argument and evidence.
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Examples: What is your favourite example used? 1 3 Oct 28, 2015 03:42PM  

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Adam Daniel Galinsky is an American social psychologist known for his research on leadership, power, negotiations, decision-making, diversity, and ethics. He is Vikram S. Pandit Professor of Business and Chair of Management Division at Columbia Business School

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