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"Don't Fight Back": And 10 Other Myths About Crime, Personal Safety, and Gender-Based Violence
A nationally recognized violence prevention expert identifies 11 myths about personal safety and offers evidence-based solutions to living a safer, freer, and more optimistic life
We receive a lot of advice about how to stay safe in society— myths like “don’t go to the bathroom alone,” “don’t go out at night,” “don’t dress too provocatively,” and, perhaps most ridiculously, “don’t wear a ponytail,”—all designed to keep (mostly) women away from potential danger.
Meg Stone, an expert in personal safety, traces the origins of these dangerous myths, and explains why safety isn't defined by men in power telling us what they think makes us safe. Myths
how attackers behavewhat (or who) to fearwhat you should never doand what you should always do.
She addresses how many of the myths are completely wrong and not based on any real evidence. Stone also spends time unpacking the kinds of myths that can't be disproven or are more nuanced than just "helpful" or "not helpful."
She concludes with a powerful treatise about how to be truly safe—or at least safer—in a world that lacks evidence, using lessons she has learned from her 20+ years teaching self-defense.
We receive a lot of advice about how to stay safe in society— myths like “don’t go to the bathroom alone,” “don’t go out at night,” “don’t dress too provocatively,” and, perhaps most ridiculously, “don’t wear a ponytail,”—all designed to keep (mostly) women away from potential danger.
Meg Stone, an expert in personal safety, traces the origins of these dangerous myths, and explains why safety isn't defined by men in power telling us what they think makes us safe. Myths
how attackers behavewhat (or who) to fearwhat you should never doand what you should always do.
She addresses how many of the myths are completely wrong and not based on any real evidence. Stone also spends time unpacking the kinds of myths that can't be disproven or are more nuanced than just "helpful" or "not helpful."
She concludes with a powerful treatise about how to be truly safe—or at least safer—in a world that lacks evidence, using lessons she has learned from her 20+ years teaching self-defense.
- GenresNonfictionFeminism
224 pages, Paperback
Published May 5, 2026
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Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews
Review of advance copy received from Author
Meg Stone’s new book offers a deeply researched and compelling dismantling of common self-defense myths. From warnings like “don’t wear a ponytail, an attacker could grab it” to the idea that we should treat anyone who seems “out of place” with suspicion, Stone shows how these beliefs lack evidence and can cause real harm. Rather than keeping us safe, these myths fuel fear, cause us to restrict our lives, and reinforce biased judgments of others.
Each chapter ends with two categories of action steps: “for yourself” and “for social change.” This actionable guidance equips readers with useful, practical, empowering tools for personal safety while also inviting them to challenge the broader cultural narratives that shape how we think about danger.
Insightful, accessible, and deeply empowering, this book doesn’t just inform—it transforms how we understand and approach personal safety.
(I received an advanced reader copy.)
Each chapter ends with two categories of action steps: “for yourself” and “for social change.” This actionable guidance equips readers with useful, practical, empowering tools for personal safety while also inviting them to challenge the broader cultural narratives that shape how we think about danger.
Insightful, accessible, and deeply empowering, this book doesn’t just inform—it transforms how we understand and approach personal safety.
(I received an advanced reader copy.)
May 24, 2026
"Don't Fight Back" promises a clear-eyed and evidence-based examination of the myths that shape public understanding of crime, personal safety, and gender-based violence. Drawing on decades of experience in empowerment self-defense, Meg Stone appears to challenge fear-driven assumptions while offering practical, nuanced guidance rooted in research and lived reality. Thoughtful, accessible, and socially urgent, the book seems poised to resonate strongly with readers interested in feminism, public safety, trauma-informed advocacy, and meaningful approaches to violence prevention.
June 9, 2026
Listened to the audiobook. Narration was boring. This book was a waste. It mostly consists of the author trying to debunk sound advice and common sense safety rules. She cites a lot of examples and then randomly attempts to explain why they are useless and meaningless. I learned nothing from this book.
July 1, 2026
Very data heavy, which I normally never complain about, but it almost buried some of the main takeaways in this case.
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews