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434 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 30, 2015
So this is my Pathetic Loser’s confession: I am Oren Tenning, and I have fallen. Hard.
“Let me get this straight. You argued with some girl and pulled her hair during sex? Wow. What are you? Five?”
“No,” I muttered, growing more irritated than ever. “I’m Ten.”
“No one’s ever pleased me the way you please me. Every time with you is better than the last. I can’t even… God, Caroline. You own me.”
“Baby, there’s nothing he could say or do to keep me away from you.”
"If he's Noel, then who're you?"
"I'm Ten."
He blinked, honestly clueless. "Ten what?"
"Ten seconds away from putting your parents out of their misery for having an idiot for a son. Jesus. Catch up, already."
So this is my Pathetic Loser's confession: I am Oren Tenning, and I have fallen. Hard.
Didn't he know that forbidding me only made me want to crowd in as close as I could until I was fucking INSIDE her?
My stupid, idiotic heart that had no sense of decency or self-preservation whatsoever. Seriously, what kind of heart fell for an annoying, obnoxious, loud-mouthed male-slut?
I can't text him saying, 'Your dick is now mine. Get it near any other woman, and I'll physically remove it from you and keep it in a jar by my bedside.' That would sound a bit creepy."
"Actually, I was thinking it sounded A LOT creepy.
What the fuck have you done to me, Caroline?
Why couldn't I stay away from you?" he demanded with another long, slow thrust. "Why can't I get enough of you?" Thrust. "Why do I want to own every fucking piece of you?" Thrust.
What do you do when you like a guy that's slept with everyone and their mother? Possibly their dog too. What? Don't look at me like that. You never know these days. You...
What do you do when you've thrown yourself at a guy and he turns you FLAT down, not once, but TWICE? You...
What's the first thought that pops into your head when he's talking to a girl?You...
What do you do when your find out he's going to hook up with a girl later tonight? You...
“Let me get this straight. You argued with some girl and pulled her hair during sex? Wow. What are you? Five?”
“No,” I muttered, growing more irritated than ever. “I’m Ten.”
Every time with you is better than the last. I can’t even… God, Caroline. You own me.
‘Lick you later, baby.’
"Your brother is going to kill us both for this, so you better make it worth our while. You better sit up there and fuck me like you meant to the first night you came into this room, wearing no panties."
"Don't move?
Are you insane?
You can't let a guy into pussy heaven and then tell him not to move."...
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“Women gutted you. They either said shit that tore out your self-confidence, or they got hurt when you should’ve been able to protect them, which left you so broken you wished you were dead. I tried to stay away from all of that “feelings” shit when it came to women.”
“…nothing about Caroline has ever been easy. That’s the curious thing about temptation. It festers and grows. You feed that bitch enough and she morphs into craving, and then craving turns into obsession. Pretty soon, nothing in your life is as important as that one thing you want but can’t have…
So, this is my Pathetic Loser’s confession: I am Oren Tenning, and I have fallen. Hard.
Full review now posted
“The sweetest part of the whole idea was that I could have exactly what I wanted, and the immature chauvinist pig who pissed me off as much as he turned me on would go away absolutely clueless.” ~ Caroline
“I’m not going anywhere without you... My heart wouldn’t be in it if you weren’t there.” I clutched her face and looked deep into her eyes. “You jump, I jump. Right, Rose?”![]()
“She was hands down the most entertaining, dynamic, devious, beautiful, amazing woman I’d ever met. If I wasn’t already crazy in love with her, I would’ve fallen in that very moment.
“What’re you saying? That I deserve this because you want me as much as I want you? Impossible. No one could want someone else this much. No one could fucking crave another this much.” ~ Ten
That’s the curious thing about temptation. It festers and grows. You feed that bitch soon enough and she morphs into craving, and then craving turns into obsession. Pretty soon, nothing in your life is as important as that one thing you want but can’t have.
It’s my own damn fault, really. I could’ve and should’ve turned her off of me for good by now. It’s just that every time I think I’ve finally done something that will make her hate me forever-something she’ll never forgive me for-the panic sets in. I can’t bear the thought of her hating me and never forgiving me. So then I have to go and do something to ensure her forgiveness.
I know what you’re thinking. Why didn’t I just cut ties with her then if I was so worried about Gamble? Well, why don’t you ask a smoker why they don’t just stop smoking, an alcoholic why they don’t just stop drinking, a book lover why they don’t just stop reading? And fuck you for thinking an addiction was even remotely easy to quit. I was addicted to this girl. I wasn’t anywhere near ready to give her up.
And thus started the true turmoil.
As soon as she passed, I shifted out my arm that had been hanging down at my side and flexed the backs of my fingers so that they brushed across hers. I kept my attention on Gamble, making sure he saw none of this. Caroline responded by weaving her fingers through mine so they interlaced for the fraction of a moment before she pulled them away and was gone.
I stared after her, pulverized. She’d been right fucking there, and the only thing I’d gotten to do was barely brush my hand against hers?
She looked up at Lowe as if she might start crying, or commit murder. I wasn’t sure which. “Sometimes he just…irritates the hell out of me.”
“I know, baby. I know.” Lowe [Mason] fed her another piece of chocolate and kissed her cheek. “He irritates the hell out of me, too.”
Something’s gotta give soon or I’ll explode…most likely inside her.
I just hope it doesn’t end up with me dead at the hands of my best friend.
Oren wouldn’t just out-of-the-blue decide to become monogamous to some stranger in the dark who refused to show him her face or tell him her name.
“I can’t text him, saying, ‘Your dick is now mine. Get it near any other woman, and I’ll physically remove it from you and keep it in a jar by my bedside.’ That would sound a bit creepy.”
“Actually, I was thinking it sounded a lot creepy.”
Watching tears fill Caroline’s eyes right before she rushed from the kitchen and not being able to chase after her had to be one of the hardest things I’d ever fucking done-or not done, in this case. Or maybe restraining myself from knocking Noel’s teeth down his throat was the hardest. I couldn’t quite decide. But I’ll tell you one thing; standing there like a dumbass and doing nothing slaughtered me.
That still didn’t excuse her in my book. She’d traumatized my Oren. The bitch must die….in my head anyway. I pictured myself pushing her off the side of a bridge and listening to her scream all the way down until…oops, she wasn’t screaming anymore.
Gamble’s woman opened the door.
“Ten,” she said in surprise. “Uh…Noel’s not here this evening. He’s working-"
“I know.” Rolling my eyes, I muttered, “I’m here for the kid. The littlest one.”
Her eyebrows shot up. “Colton?”
“Yep. That one. He wants to play… " I sighed heavily, “catch.”
Gamble contorted his face into an expression of supreme confusion. Then he glanced at his wife. “He didn’t hit on you, did he?”
She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Noel. Really?”
“Yeah, Noel,” I echoed. “Really? I was a perfectly respectable gentleman.” Then I winked at Shakespeare [Noel’s wife, Aspen]. “After we put our clothes back on.”
Gam’s face turned dark red. “You motherfucker!”
"So, this is my Pathetic Loser’s confession: I am Oren Tenning, and I have fallen. Hard."
"Do you want me or not?”
“You know I want you. That’s the problem. I want you but I can’t have you.”
“Well, you already have had me... The question is...are you going to keep me?”
“How can I help you through this? What can I do to ease your pain, because I swear to God, I’ll do anything.”
Absolutely anything.
“Just love me,” she whispered. “I do,” I promised.
“You jump, I jump. Right, Rose?”
She really started sobbing then.
“Oh my God. We’re about to be sent to airplane jail and you’re quoting Titanic?”
“I love you, Oren. I just...I want you back.”