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The Man in the Monster: An Intimate Portrait of a Serial Killer

Martha Elliott

3.58 · Rating details · 383 ratings · 76 reviews

An astonishing portrait of a murderer and his complex relationship with a crusading journalist

Michael Ross was a serial killer who raped and murdered eight young women between 1981 and 1984, and several years ago the state of Connecticut put him to death. His crimes were horrific, and he paid the ultimate price for them.

When journalist Martha Elliott first heard of Ross, s An astonishing portrait of a murderer and his complex relationship with a crusading journalist

Michael Ross was a serial killer who raped and murdered eight young women between 1981 and 1984, and several years ago the state of Connecticut put him to death. His crimes were horrific, and he paid the ultimate price for them.

When journalist Martha Elliott first heard of Ross, she learned what the world knew of him—that he had been a master at hiding in plain sight. Elliott, a staunch critic of the death penalty, was drawn to the case when the Connecticut Supreme Court overturned Ross's six death sentences. Rather than fight for his life, Ross requested that he be executed because he didn't want the families of his victims to suffer through a new trial. Elliott was intrigued and sought an interview. The two began a weekly conversation—that developed into an odd form of friendship—that lasted over a decade, until Ross's last moments on earth.

Over the course of his twenty years in prison, Ross had come to embrace faith for the first time in his life. He had also undergone extensive medical treatment. The Michael Ross whom Elliott knew seemed to be a different man from the monster who was capable of such heinous crimes. This Michael Ross made it his mission to share his story with Elliott in the hopes that it would save lives. He was her partner in unlocking the mystery of his own evil.

In The Man in the Monster, Martha Elliott gives us a groundbreaking look into the life and motivation of a serial killer. Drawing on a decade of conversations and letters between Ross and the author, readers are given an in-depth view of a killer's innermost thoughts and secrets, revealing the human face of a monster—without ignoring the horrors of his crimes. Elliott takes us deep into a world of court hearings, tomb-like prisons, lawyers hell-bent to kill or to save—and families ravaged by love and hate. This is the personal story of a journalist who came to know herself in ways she could never have imagined when she opened the notebook for that first interview.

Praise for The Man in the Monster:

"Elliott's harrowing story pulls off something brilliant and new. Elliott peered into the mind of a serial killer by becoming his friend. A narrative that is riveting, honest, and devastating." —Jack Hitt, author of Bunch of Amateurs: A Search for the American Character

"Martha Elliott takes us inside the mind of serial killer and rapist Michael Ross. Elliott spent ten years getting to know the man behind the monster, and the pace of her book is as fast and merciless as a thriller." —Rebecca Tinsley, author of When the Stars Fall to Earth ...more

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Hardcover, 336 pages

Published August 4th 2015 by Penguin Press

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Aug 15, 2020 Erin Clemence rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: non-fiction-biography

Journalist Martha Elliot became intrigued by serial killer Michael Ross when, instead of fighting for his life, he chose to accept the death row sentence he was handed, claiming he “owed it to the families of his victims”. During ten years of court appearances and appeals, Elliot met with Ross (in person and over the phone), to try and figure out what would make someone give up their life so easily. A staunch opposer to the death penalty, Elliot decided to turn her interviews into a novel and “T Journalist Martha Elliot became intrigued by serial killer Michael Ross when, instead of fighting for his life, he chose to accept the death row sentence he was handed, claiming he “owed it to the families of his victims”. During ten years of court appearances and appeals, Elliot met with Ross (in person and over the phone), to try and figure out what would make someone give up their life so easily. A staunch opposer to the death penalty, Elliot decided to turn her interviews into a novel and “The Man in the Monster” was born. Ten years later, Elliot and Ross have formed a strange friendship, and Ross is finally executed for his crimes.

Michael Ross raped and murdered eight women, including two young teenagers. Ross himself does not argue that the crime was committed, but states inside that “the monster inside him” (his mental illness) committed the crime. Ross claims he wanted the police, his lawyers and even journalists to help him determine WHY he could not control his monster, and therefore was agreeable to interviews and interrogations. Elliot’s goal was to meet Michael Ross, the person, and separate him from Michael Ross, the monster.

This was a hard novel for me to read without judgment. Ross is a manipulative cretin, and he uses his mental illness as an excuse for harming innocent people. Ross had a rough childhood with an overbearing mother and an emotionally absent father (the parenting nightmare that is present with most serial killers) , as well as siblings (who turned into fully functioning, non-crime-committing adults) and I was intrigued as to why Michael became the person he was.

Many psychologists and psychiatrists claimed Michael was a “sexual sadist”, and they claimed that if this mental illness had been controlled, Michael would not have committed such heinous crimes. Using these examples, Elliot tried to portray Michael as a “serial killer with a moral compass”. I tried (oh, how I tried) , to view him through Elliot’s eyes. I was definitely not successful.

I enjoyed reading about Michaels’ background and upbringing, trying to determine what made him turn against the mores of society. His continued claims of “the devil made me do it” (more or less) were predictable, as serial killers all have some kind of mental illness, but his “feelings of guilt and remorse” contradicted with his statements that he did not see his victims as people. He felt for the parents of his victims, but yet his victims “had it coming”? A complete manipulation, using the facts that would garner him the most sympathy. Ross was insistent that he did not want to leave the world with the reputation of the “serial killer Michael Ross”. (just a thought? How about you try not killing people?)

Needless to say, as my babbling dictates, this novel got me thinking and feeling (both good feelings and bad) . Elliot writes very well, and she covers all the angles, including getting interviews from some of the victims’ families which I found respectful and heartfelt. Although we saw Ross differently, Elliot makes a profound effort at attempting to humanize Ross. I think readers may not see him this way, but I thoroughly enjoyed the background and psychological portrayal of Ross, and it was definitely a disturbing read.
...more

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May 06, 2015 Cynthia rated it it was amazing

Shelves: books-read-in-2015

Not a Impartial Account

This is not a balanced account but that’s fair. The author is entitled to her beliefs and world view. Elliott carefully goes through the serial killer Michael Ross’s life and his crimes as well as his mental state and capacity. She also retells as much as is known about the crime committed on each of his many victims. This part of the book is excruciating to read however I respect that she did it. Each victim deserves to be accounted for along with their fear, and often th ...more

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Jul 09, 2015 Heather Fineisen rated it liked it

Shelves: sad-but-true-crime, firstreads

A book is meant to evoke an emotional reaction in the reader. This is what an author strives for, correct? Martha Elliott has succeeded. My emotional reaction is irritated. Elliott, a reporter at the beginning of following of this story, befriends convicted serial killer and rapist Michael Ross as he sits on death row fighting for the death penalty. She grapples with her own conscience and beliefs and offers a comprehensive overview of serial killing and death penalty cases.

However, I found mys ...more

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Aug 26, 2015 Karen Wright rated it did not like it

I was very interested in this topic since I had a cousin who was murdered by a serial killer back in 1980 who was subsequently executed in 2013.

I thought this book would give me insight into why a person could do such a thing to others. Instead, the author, Martha Elliot, crossed all boundaries of professional journalism by becoming friends with the serial killer/rapist, and ultimately living a decade of her life for him -- trying to defend his horrific crimes (and coming to terms with her feel ...more

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Aug 10, 2015 Jeanette Rivard rated it did not like it

This is a very strange book. It's really about the author and her friendship with a killer as much as it is about anything. Martha Elliott is no Truman Capote, that's for sure. And I kept feeling like she thought it an honor to become friends with someone so vile. I can't help feeling that she might have been a victim herself: of the charms and manipulation of a psychopath. ...more

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Jul 25, 2015 Meghan rated it liked it

This may well be the hardest review I have written. Not because I did not like the book or disagreed with something, but rather because my mind can't settle after finishing this story. I had never heard of Michael Ross before this book. So his stories, his victims, their families and the insight Martha Elliot provided was all new to me as I read and became immersed in this story. To say this book was horrifying, gripping, unsettling, etc. would not be adequate in explaining the complexity of emo This may well be the hardest review I have written. Not because I did not like the book or disagreed with something, but rather because my mind can't settle after finishing this story. I had never heard of Michael Ross before this book. So his stories, his victims, their families and the insight Martha Elliot provided was all new to me as I read and became immersed in this story. To say this book was horrifying, gripping, unsettling, etc. would not be adequate in explaining the complexity of emotions and reflections that I experienced while reading this story. It would be easy to read this story as if it is were fiction, but knowing that these events did take place, these crimes did occur and that these people are dead just led me to a different seriousness and reaction.

I was appalled at the crimes, hurt for the families, but also shocked at how many times there were issues that ME showcased in the justice system during and after the trial with the attorneys, transcripts, jury issues and more. Her step by step approach to showing the events, the appeals, how her relationship grew, the honesty between the two and the final days and moments of Michael Ross's life provide a gut wrenching view into the arena of mental illness, death penalty and the American justice system. I appreciate the honesty ME demonstrated with her feelings about her research, Michael's role in her and her family's life, the idea of the death penalty and more. The roles of Michael the man versus the monster are very clearly showcased in this book with the conversations between them regarding family, faith, sarcasm about how he is the only guilty one on death row and then those regarding his retelling of the crimes, emotions and thoughts especially when he wrote ME the letter about one of the stalking/rape/murder crimes.

If you are passionate about true crime or really like knowing the why or how behind a situation this book will grab you from the beginning. I think that individuals, legal scholars, and those interested in the justice system, death penalty and mental illness would find this book extremely riveting especially given the current conversations regarding mental illness with gun control and other legal matters. Regardless if you are pro or anti death penalty or pro or anti the need for more help with/funding for mental illness research and aid Michael Ross's story and ME's telling of the people involved will cause you to think through your stance, where our judicial system was and is and how decisions impact people (victims, the families, the perpetrator, friends, legal workers, community, etc.) immediately and for years to come. ...more

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Jul 30, 2015 Valerity (Val) rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: true-crime, non-fiction

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. This book was given to me by Netgalley to read and review for Penguin Press.

Journalist Martha Elliott wrote it after spending more than a decade talking to, writing, and at times meeting with Michael Ross, a serial killer from Connecticut who raped and murdered at least 8 women between 1981 and 1984. She originally heard about him when she was working as the editor and publisher of the Connecticut Law Review, and decided to do an article about him. She had read how the Connecticut Supreme Court ...more

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Dec 06, 2015 Jen rated it it was ok

Shelves: netgalley-arc, doves-falling-reviews

Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Group: The Penguin Press for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

It’s telling that midway through the first bit of this book – which I found to be about as imbalanced a portrayal of this subject as possible – I actually grabbed my phone to take a photo of my Kindle.

My husband gave me a strange look, naturally and asked what I was doing.

“Making sure I don’t forget this part. It made me so angry I’m afraid I’ll black it out due to rage.”

Let me just repeat th ...more

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Mar 28, 2015 John Allen rated it did not like it

Michael Ross, the subject of Martha Elliot's hybrid memoir/"I'll remember you" tale of friendship with a death row inmate, was convicted of raping and murdering 8 women from 1981 - 1984. These included adolescent girls.

Martha Elliot befriended (if the reader is content to believe that friendship was all that was going on here) Michael Ross during her prestigious career as a journalist. While writing for the Tribune she decided to interview Ross about his guilt or innocence. For some reason, the Michael Ross, the subject of Martha Elliot's hybrid memoir/"I'll remember you" tale of friendship with a death row inmate, was convicted of raping and murdering 8 women from 1981 - 1984. These included adolescent girls.

Martha Elliot befriended (if the reader is content to believe that friendship was all that was going on here) Michael Ross during her prestigious career as a journalist. While writing for the Tribune she decided to interview Ross about his guilt or innocence. For some reason, the interview had to be in person rather on the phone.

The two hit it off famously, and a budding friendship began. She began to study his life. A victim of psychological abuse by his mother, he began his career of raping and murdering women in college, even though he had plenty of girlfriends.

My problem with the book comes down, really, to the believability of Ross' motives when interacting with Elliot, and her almost complete lack of skepticism regarding them.

She behaved almost as if she were his secretary, advocate, and something else? all at once. So eager indeed was she to help Ross that she delivered documents and newspapers to him on a daily basis, and would immediately call him back to read to him from whatever book or article he was curious about. Miss Elliot is a celebrated journalist for good reason and I don't intend to take any cheap shots, but not once in the entirety of this challenging text do you really get the sense that she's even raised that important question: am I being manipulated by a psychopathic rapist/murderer?

We hear about his hormone therapy, his struggles in court, his willingness to "surrender his life" and accept the death penalty to "satisfy the needs of the victims". Of course, paragraphs before, she recounts from letters he wrote which describe prison life as not worth enduring, or death being better. He writes a lot about his suffering and displays a sort of disturbing, superficial chivalry, urging Elliot to take "the safest flights" to come see him, and appearing to always have his victims in mind. (In an "altruistic" way, of course.)

And of course with this book a prominent journalist has a sort of "In Cold Blood", new, exciting release and a murderer had some more free time while being in prison. Both parties benefited.

This tries to be "Dead Man Walking" but it isn't. I am an opponent of the death penalty and realize that prisoners need advocates, even the most repugnant ones. I just don't think that's what was going on here.

This could be a good textbook for an Abnormal Psych class.
...more

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Oct 05, 2015 Brigid Keely rated it really liked it

Shelves: non-fiction, crime, memoir, women-writers, 2015-published

"The Man in the Monster: An Intimate Portrait of a Serial Killer," by Martha Elliott, is not like other books about serial killers I've read. Most books about serial killers, at least the ones I've read, are breathy sensational accounts with lurid attention to gory detail. They're fast paced and voyeuristic, almost pornographic. They take delight in recounting the horrific details and speculating as to what awful parts of the killers' pasts caused them to do what they did.

"The Man in the Monster "The Man in the Monster: An Intimate Portrait of a Serial Killer," by Martha Elliott, is not like other books about serial killers I've read. Most books about serial killers, at least the ones I've read, are breathy sensational accounts with lurid attention to gory detail. They're fast paced and voyeuristic, almost pornographic. They take delight in recounting the horrific details and speculating as to what awful parts of the killers' pasts caused them to do what they did.

"The Man in the Monster" spends a bit of time dwelling on Ross' abusive family life and upbringing, mentions the lesions in his brain and the hormone therapy that he claims got his "monster" under control (although the author, who communicated with him for ten years and came to consider him a friend, still noted that he was narcissistic and manipulative) but the primary focus of the book is on capital punishment and whether it has a place in our society.

Elliot points out that capital punishment is emotionally stressful for the prisoners awaiting execution, and for the staff who have to arrange for the execution. She points out that an execution costs more than life in prison. She mentions that killing a criminal doesn't actually solve any problems for survivors, for their victims and the victims' family members. By introducing us to the human side of Ross, she has us recognize the fact that the state murdered a man as punishment for crimes he may not have been been able to prevent. Killing him doesn't bring the murdered girls back. Killing him doesn't ease the pain of their families. What does it accomplish?

It's a well written book. Slow moving at first, it gradually draws us into Elliott's life and motivations and her discussions and correspondence with Ross. Elliot does a fantastic job humanizing him without excusing or forgiving him; she doesn't overlook his flaws or the horrible things he's done. It's a nice balance of "this man did monstrous things" and "this man is still a man."

I wasn't sure I'd like this book at first. It's very different from the serial killer books I'm used to. It's much more mature, and much more thoughtful. It was an emotionally difficult read, in a good way, but I'm glad I read it. ...more

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Sep 05, 2015 Jo Lisa rated it really liked it

Shelves: books-read-in-2015, public-library

If you have watched any of my Booktuber videos, then you know that I have a fascination with serial killers... FICTION killers mostly. However, I also read nonfiction of the same sort, with a desire to understand what brings this out in a person... What causes someone to kill repeatedly?? Because of this desire to see the real person, I am very much against the death penalty! This book made me even more sure that, in my opinion and mine alone, we have no right to take someone's life... The autho ...more

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Jan 08, 2016 Ruth rated it it was ok

Many thanks to Penguin Group and Netgalley for the ARC. The first half of the book didn't annoy me nearly as much as the second half did. What bothers me is not the writing, which is decent, but the unreliable voice of the narrator and how this unreliability shapes the narrative. What makes Ms. Elliot's voice seem unreliable is that nowhere in this book does she acknowledge the possibility that someone diagnosed with a narcissistic personality disorder could possibly be using her or manipulating ...more

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Jul 09, 2018 Emmy rated it liked it

Shelves: 2018

While the book is about a serial killer who killed eight women in a short span of time, the book does not give the victims the same amount of research and detail it gives to the convicted murderer.
I did not find the account impartial. True, the author expressed her horror at the crimes, but went into great effort to show how the murderer is in fact a victim himself. I do not totally agree with her point of view, since many people had terrible childhoods and some were even abused still they did ...more

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Oct 06, 2018 Anne Howard rated it really liked it · review of another edition

I initially wanted to give this book a 3-star rating because I felt that the author had an anti-death penalty agenda (and she does.) However, having written a similar book about a serial killer that I got to know, I have other insights to offer. The author was deeply troubled by the matter- and she no doubt continues to be troubled to this day. That counts for something. She had the courage to face evil and the perplexing and disturbing question of the mystery head on. She is a very good writer. ...more

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Jun 27, 2015 Izrael rated it it was amazing

Shelves: netgalley

I received this book through NetGalley from Penguin Group for an honest feedback.

Martha, the author, had written the book exceptionally well for the readers to be engrossed when reading. The book is not only compelling and intresting but presented in a way that allows me to be submerged whenever I opened it. The psychological explanation that she decoded from different psychatrist and doctors to explain what sexual sadism is made me understand it much better.

Martha intresting relationship with t I received this book through NetGalley from Penguin Group for an honest feedback.

Martha, the author, had written the book exceptionally well for the readers to be engrossed when reading. The book is not only compelling and intresting but presented in a way that allows me to be submerged whenever I opened it. The psychological explanation that she decoded from different psychatrist and doctors to explain what sexual sadism is made me understand it much better.

Martha intresting relationship with the serial killer, Micheal Ross, had evolved from the first time she was in contact with him. Initially, she was afraid of him because she was reminded of the terror he had induced on the families of the girls he had killed. The 8 girls whom he had murdered and 7 of those he raped was at the back of Martha’s mind whenever she interacted with him. But, their relationship evolved from being aquantices to good friends which involved weekly calls from Micheal. Martha had not only reminded me of the terror Micheal each time but also she had made me see the human being in him. By the end of the book, I was able to see how much he was struggling to gain control of the monster but he wanted forgiveness for all the sins he done which is doubtful to get from the family.

However, it’s particularly disturbing for me to read the details of the murder Michael Ross committed. The precised image of the process he made the girls did before killing them was creepy. At times, it made me freaked as I felt that I was there watching him doing all of these unthinkable acts and I was not able to do anything. These made me feared him and I felt that most readers would not be able to withstand reading the murders that will give them the graphics of how the monster did his bidding.

Overall, I had to do many different readings to understand the psychological factor that was presented. It taken me a month to complete the book to have a better comprehension of Michael Ross. The flow of the book is well-thought and the evolution of the relationship between Martha and Michael was unexpected. I would recommend this book to a psychology student as they would be able to understand the mental illness that he had.

View more of my bookreviews at: https://alimuhdmusic.wordpress.com/ ...more

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Nov 02, 2016 Sandie rated it really liked it

Shelves: non-fiction

In the early 1980's, Michael Ross stalked, raped and killed eight women in Connecticut. In 2005, he was put to death by lethal injection, the last person to be executed in that state. In between, for the last ten years of his life, journalist Martha Elliott interviewed him through weekly phone calls, letters and in person to determine what made this man do these horrible acts.

Ross was an intelligent person who graduated college and seemed ready to have a successful career. Instead, his compulsio ...more

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Feb 24, 2016 Mary Jo rated it it was ok

My positive thoughts on this book:

1. It's well-written, and I appreciate how the narrative flows.
2. It tackles a tough subject with tact and respect, in some ways.
3. I understand and respect that these stories need to be told. It's important to try to understand why people commit the crimes they do, and how early experiences can wire someone to commit heinous acts. It's not an easy undertaking, and in the style of In Cold Blood, or even Dead Man Walking, there are multiple voices that need to b ...more

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Mar 12, 2016 Jlsimon rated it really liked it

Shelves: audible, true-crime

This book is one that takes a different approach to crime investigative writing. Ms. Elliott spent over 10 years getting to know Michael Ross. He became her friend, and as a result her writing was not unbiased. She empathized with the him. She truly learned to relate more to him than to his victims.

Things that I found interesting in this book is that you can see shadows of Ann Rule's "The Stranger Beside Me" in this story. Like Ann, Ms. Elliott tried to show the truth of the case. Another famous ...more

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Jul 01, 2015 Marjorie rated it liked it

I’m sure this non-fiction book was a very personal and difficult one for the author to write. She befriended a serial killer and seeks to expose the man inside the monster. I’m not at all sure she accomplished that. It was very hard to determine whether anything this killer said or did was the truth or whether he was manipulating others, including the author. By the end of the book, I had little sympathy for this man.

The main debate in the book is whether a killer who is mentally ill should be e ...more

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Jul 08, 2015 Tara rated it really liked it

Shelves: peaked-my-interest, thoroughly-enjoyed-it, free-e-book, first-reads, nook-e-books

I received an advanced e-galley of this book through the Penguin Books First to Read Program. I did not know anything about Michael Ross before receiving this book, but I found his story very fascinating. Martha Elliott spent 10 years corresponding and meeting with Michael to learn why, after receiving a reprieve from the Connecticutt State Supreme Court, why he would voluntarily choose to be put to death for his heinous crimes. Her research and investigation into the history about the murders, ...more

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Feb 10, 2017 Erin Weigel rated it it was amazing

If you're interested in abnormal psychology, neurology, or capital punishment and the judicial system, this book is a really quick and interesting read. Elliott's way of writing is engaging, personal, yet also interestingly objective considering her profession as a journalist.

I think the main overarching theme of this book is that things are never black and white. Our simplistic human brains like to categorize things and people into "good" / "bad" generalizations, but there are often so many th ...more

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Sep 15, 2015 Gypsy36 added it

I had a had time with this book. It is well written and readable but I felt a tad duped by the end. I think people need to know at the beginning that the author's relationship with this death row inmate becomes very complicated. By the end, reading between the lines and her recollection of their last moments together suggests that this was more than just a friendship for this author. She spent incredible amounts of money, gave up such significant time and her children were exposed to the realiti ...more

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Jun 25, 2016 Dawn rated it really liked it

I thought this Bol would be more about the killer but I became absorbed in why the author became so obsessed with him. It was fascinating and eerie all at the same time.

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Jun 23, 2018 Sheng rated it liked it · review of another edition

Shelves: library, crime, non-fiction

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. There are many books out there about true crime stories and serial killers. There aren't many like The Man in the Monster: An Intimate Portrait of a Serial Killer though where the author herself corresponds directly with the serial killer, forming a strangely genuine friendship as a result.

Michael Ross is the serial killer in question in this book. Convicted of multiple sexual assaults and eight murders, Ross was sentenced to jail but his punishment was subsequently changed to life imprisonment There are many books out there about true crime stories and serial killers. There aren't many like The Man in the Monster: An Intimate Portrait of a Serial Killer though where the author herself corresponds directly with the serial killer, forming a strangely genuine friendship as a result.

Michael Ross is the serial killer in question in this book. Convicted of multiple sexual assaults and eight murders, Ross was sentenced to jail but his punishment was subsequently changed to life imprisonment due to mental illness. Ross always claimed there was a 'monster' inside of him that took over when he lived out his violent sexual fantasies and as a result, was diagnosed by multiple psychiatrists of sexual sadism. In order to repent for the monster's actions and to spare his victims' families of the turmoil of enduring a long trial, Ross requests for a death penalty and thus attracts the initial attention of journalist and author Martha Elliot.

Michael Ross' life story mirrors those of many other serial killers. Childhood abuse by his mother slowly built up violent tendencies in him and a slow escalation of violent and sexual behaviours led him to stalk, rape and murder his victims. His actions often followed a ritualistic sequence that seemed to be a kind of reenacted punishment for the women of his life that did him wrong. Through both Ross' first-hand accounts and other sources, Elliott pieces together Ross' crime spree and how he carried out both his rapes and murders.

The part of this book that shines is perhaps Elliott's own relationship with Ross and her interviews with both Ross and his victim's families. Elliott herself admitted that it took her an extremely long time to come to the terms that she had indeed become friends with a man who was responsible for some incredibly repulsive crimes. What I appreciated from Elliott's interviews though was that she was never standoff-ish in her conversations with Ross but she always called him out when she felt that he was being unreasonable or ridiculous by painting a pitiful figure of himself or trying to draw sympathy. Still, she formed a genuine friendship with Ross after ten years of interactions and when his wish was fulfilled, she mourned for his death. Elliott also handled interviews with the victims' families well, being both respectful and trying to be reasonable in her depiction of Ross but never defending his actions.

Overall, this book was pretty insightful in portraying the complete man behind a serial killer, not just his crimes but the rest of his personality as well. While it still sort of follows a standard formula for serial killer books, there was some highlights in the form of Elliott's relationship with Ross. 3.5/5 ...more

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Aug 06, 2019 Nerfzilla rated it liked it

This is an extremely difficult book for me to review. It is a book that tries to understand another human being. It tries to understand a number of things about Michael Ross. A man from Connecticut who despite growing up in a terribly sick and dysfunctional poor family, was accepted to and attended Cornell University School of Agriculture, eventually graduating with a degree. A man who shortly before he graduated began stalking women, terrifying them, and ultimately raping and murdering eight wo ...more

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Oct 21, 2018 Monica Willyard Moen rated it really liked it

Shelves: nls, kindle, mysteries, personal-growth

This book was emotionally painful to read. It was well written, and it is to the author’s credit that I finished the book feeling emotionally confused, torn, and divided. I wanted to hate the criminal, the subject of this book. I wanted to think of him as a despicable animal with no remorse or self control.
Instead, I met a man who had been those things but who was also a sinner seeking forgiveness from God primarily and to some extent from the families of his victims. He attempted to hasten his ...more

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Jan 22, 2017 Robert P. Hoffman rated it it was amazing

This is a powerful book, I did not expect it to be as good as it turned out to be.

The author does an excellent job of showing how someone can become friends with a serial killer. The author does an excellent job of showing the pain and suffering the victims went through and the families went through.

The author is opposed to the death penalty but she never lectures the reader and she is quite understanding of the feelings of the families. If her account is truthful, and I have no reason to doubt ...more

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Sep 11, 2017 Misty Moseley-Helber rated it it was ok · review of another edition

While I found this book interesting, I feel like the author allowed herself to be manipulated. I wanted more of an insight into the mind of a serial killer and way less of his bullshit. It's almost like he wanted people to believe he was innocent and it wasn't him who raped and killed so many women... well, okay, it was him but it was only a small evil part of him that he had no control over... a monster that took over his mind.
I'm also suspicious of his motives for voluntarily stopping the lega ...more

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Jun 18, 2019 Kim Johnson rated it really liked it

This a well written and interesting accounting of Michael Ross, and reading the conversations between the author and the killer was fascinating. I didn’t buy Ross’ remorse or the idea that he was somehow separate from the monster who killed, but I don’t see that as a failing of the book. Rather, it serves as a window in to a narcissist who claimed to be attempting to spare the victims’ families of further pain while pretty clearly actually trying to manipulate everything and everyone around him.

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Jul 13, 2020 Darlene Jilks rated it really liked it

I really enjoyed this book. I am glad that Martha was able to become Micheal's friend and meet his father. It is a disturbing story to read and I feel very bad for the family of the victims. I was not sure if I felt bad for Micheal or if he was "bluffing" about his real feelings. I did enjoy the read though and I hope that Martha is not forever bothered about being Micheal's friend. ...more

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