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Give Yourself a Break: Turning Your Inner Critic Into a Compassionate Friend

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3.98  ·  Rating details ·  54 ratings  ·  24 reviews
Many people are used to showing compassion to others. What many of us have trouble with is showing that same compassion to ourselves. Too often we say things to ourselves that we would never say to a friend. All this negative self-talk can have a devastating effect on our lives.
Licensed marriage and family therapist Kim Fredrickson wants readers to stop beating themselves
...more
Paperback, 192 pages
Published July 7th 2015 by Fleming H. Revell Company (first published July 3rd 2015)
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3.98  · 
Rating details
 ·  54 ratings  ·  24 reviews


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Mark
Sep 14, 2017 rated it did not like it
I cannot in good conscience finish this book. Maybe it's just me but this book seems very self-centered. I am a wonderful person. I am a special person. I am this. I am that. I can do this and that. It's not my fault. And on and on.
Every day I thank God for who I am and for the the things I have in my life. Every day I make mistakes ( I am a sinner after all) but I turn to God to help me, not myself. I ask for forgiveness, and hope to learn from my mistakes. I feel good when I help others not wh
...more
Victor Gentile
Jun 27, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Kim Fredrickson in her new book, “Give Yourself A Break” published by Revell gives us Turning Your Inner Critic into a Compassionate Friend.

From the Back Cover: It’s time to start treating yourself the way you treat others

As children we’re taught to treat others the way we would like to be treated. But as adults, we often need to turn that old maxim around. We’re good at showing compassion to other people–but many of us have trouble showing that same compassion to ourselves. We say things to our
...more
Rachel DeVaughn
Jul 14, 2015 rated it really liked it
I really enjoyed reading this book by this licensed marriage and family therapist of over 30 years. I found it extremely helpful in my own life as well as helping and relating to other family members.

The author describes on page 12 her hopes for this book and why she wrote it-“to provide some understanding of why self-compassion is so hard to extend to ourselves, and second, that it provides hope and and practical help in learning to relate to ourselves in healthy and gracious ways”.

This book is
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Create With Joy
Jul 04, 2015 rated it really liked it
When you were growing up, you were probably taught that you should treat others the way that you would like to be treated. But, think about how you interact with the people in your life. Do you actually treat yourself as well as you treat the people around you?

* Are you kinder to others than you are to yourself?
* Do you find it easier to forgive others for their mistakes than for your own?
* Do you hear your inner voice saying things to yourself that you would never say to someone else?

If you fin
...more
Jalynn Patterson
Jul 02, 2015 rated it it was amazing
About the Book:
Many people are used to showing compassion to others. What many of us have trouble with is showing that same compassion to ourselves. Too often we say things to ourselves that we would never say to a friend. All this negative self-talk can have a devastating effect on our lives.
Licensed marriage and family therapist Kim Fredrickson wants readers to stop beating themselves up. Grounding her advice in the Bible, she offers practical steps and specific exercises to reprogram our tho
...more
Lindsey Silvestrini
Jul 02, 2015 rated it it was amazing
There is no one harder on themselves in life than moms and probably women in general. We are our own worst critic. It's hard not to play the comparison game, beat ourselves up for our mistakes and suffer from feelings of guilt for no doing it all. Kim Fredrickson reminds us all of grace and loving ourselves in her book Give Yourself a Break.

Why is it so easy for us to show compassion to our kids, friends and family but no ourselves? Why do we continue to beat ourselves up day after day? Fredrick
...more
Shelly Hendricks
Jul 09, 2015 rated it it was amazing
Of course, I read this book through the lens of chronic illness and disability. We are probably more in need of this book than healthy readers are, honestly! We're so hard on ourselves, hardly ever granting ourselves grace. And so much of our lives is out of necessity focused on ourselves, we refuse to spend any extra effort of self-care.

This book is written in a very caring way. Not only that, but it gives practical guidance and step-by-step instruction on how to go about caring for ourselves
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Michele Morin
Jul 01, 2015 rated it really liked it
I really don’t believe in coincidence, so when a major oversight on my part caused a disappointing and inconvenient plight for my family, it was not for nothing that Give Yourself a Break by Kim Fredrickson was already on my night stand waiting to be read. I needed to hear its message of “self-compassion” — the truth that I am worthy of the same grace that I would offer to someone else in my situation. Kim makes an important distinction between self-compassion and self-pity, where we “wallow in ...more
A.C. Cuddy
Jun 29, 2015 rated it really liked it
“It's time to start treating yourself the way you treat others. As children we're taught to treat others the way we would like to be treated. But as adults, we often need to turn that old maxim around. We're good at showing compassion to other people--but many of us have trouble showing that same compassion to ourselves. We say things to ourselves we would never say to a friend. And all this negative self-talk can have a devastating effect on our lives and relationships.”

Why is it that we can ov
...more
Becky Van Daniker
Jun 29, 2015 rated it really liked it
Licensed marriage and family therapist Kim Fredrickson offers a unique approach to self-compassion. I majored in counseling when I was in college so I found it really fascinating and a useful resource. It is well-written gentle in its text, and Biblically sound. I’m excited that there is a book on this topic because there aren’t many.

As Christians, it can be really difficult to incorporate the practice of self-compassion.

“As children we’re taught to treat others the way we would like to be treat
...more
Hallie Szott
Jun 09, 2015 marked it as on-hold
This review is also posted on Book by Book.

Give Yourself a Break: Turning Your Inner Critic into a Compassionate Friend by Kim Fredrickson offers important points about the topic of self-compassion. I know that it’s easier for me at least, when something goes wrong, to be harder on myself than I typically would be on others - and I am sure this is true of many other individuals as well. To work against this unhealthy way of thinking, Fredrickson gives many practical tips and tools to help anyone
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Joan
Jul 02, 2015 rated it it was amazing
I really liked this book. There is much in it that helped me explain much of my behavior and that of others. We are to show the same compassion to ourselves that we do to others and that God shows to us. We are too hard on ourselves, the author writes. We know we are forgiven for our sins, but knowing it in our head is different than knowing it in our heart. I would especially recommend this book to parents. Children do not have the brain development to be balanced in their thinking after they h ...more
Rebekah
Jul 21, 2015 rated it did not like it
Shelves: first-reads
/*disclaimer: first reads*/
Fredrickson comes across as a patient therapist, gentle mom, and happy Christian.

She also comes across as a terrible, cheesy writer. Her style makes me cringe, like making me eat one of those fluffy meringues that I detest. Especially the monologues that she uses too liberally.

She also takes some liberties with interpreting biblical quotes, like when she takes loving your neighbour as yourself and turns it into loving yourself as your neighbour. Sure, it could have bee
...more
Sarah Tummey
Jun 08, 2015 rated it it was amazing
So much useful material here, it's hard to know what to mention and what to leave out. Kim defines self-care as being a good steward of ourselves, whilst being aware of the needs of others. She examines our areas of need (physical, spiritual, etc), different ways of dealing with our emotions, and some of the things that can stop us adequately caring for ourselves. Would strongly recommend to anyone who's suffered with anxiety or depression, to carers, and to all parents, whatever your children's ...more
Chua Shuyi
Apr 04, 2016 rated it it was amazing
A book that had immediate application and immediate self-soothing effect. Till today, it's my number one choice for gift for friends who tend to be critical of themselves. It really worked like magic. Through this book, you learn what to say to yourself when you make a mistake. You learn not to scold yourself and make yourself feel lousy, but how to be your own encourager and friend. It's so easy and compelling to read. Kim really did a great job writing this book.
Katrina K
Jul 08, 2015 rated it really liked it
Shelves: goodreads-win
Goodreads win. Will read and review once received.

I have always been a little apprehensive about books like these, but I gave this book a try. By giving this book a try I found myself to really enjoy it. It was written well. It was also a very well informed book. I can see a lot of people enjoying this book and finding it to help them. I really liked that after each chapter there was reflection questions. It really makes you think about what you just read and helps let it set in.
Janka H.
Dec 28, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Compassionate self-help book about how to treat yourself with both grace and truth.
The book is written from the Christian standpoint, but it is not preachy and non-believer can read it too without feeling influenced by this standpoint.

I recognize the deep truth that one can be the worst enemy to themselves, to treat themselves more harshly and untruthfully that the real enemy would. And also that we are precious, created by God Himself and we have been given the stewardship of us (our body, mi
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Roxanne
Mar 29, 2019 rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
This was a pretty cheesy read. There were some good practical points and I appreciated the chapters on how self-compassion influences relationships as well as the emphasis on self-care but otherwise, I felt like there was a lot of cheesy fluff to read through. I wanted to put the book down on more than one occasion but pushed through to the end.
Timothy Taylor
Not too bad

Overall had some good principles. Had some strange ideas too though. I was disappointed to see so much reliance on "self-help" instead of on God for help. Jesus is the best friend we could ever have. Relying on Him for compassion is the best way, not relying on self. We will always let ourselves down. But Jesus never will. We need to look to Him, not to self.
Alaina
Jun 23, 2015 marked it as to-read
Great book Received this from Netgalley

I really enjoyed this book. It gives yourself advice on turning yourself from a your inner critic into a compassionate friend. It first starts with what is and what compassion is not. It also says that we can learn to be a kind person who encourages. It also talks about anxiety in relationships. It talks about do you really treat yourself as well as you treat other people around you. Are you kinder to others or do you find it easier to forgive others than y
...more
Kasey Cocoa
Jun 20, 2015 rated it it was ok
I didn't end up finishing this although I believe this is no fault of the author. I just didn't connect with what the author was saying. I believe this will fit well with certain readers, just not readers like myself. Overall it's intelligently written and I do believe will be the perfect book for someone out there. I received an ARC through the publisher in exchange for an honest review. This in no way influenced my opinion.
Mary
Jun 07, 2015 rated it really liked it
I would recommend this book to everyone to read. I just recently went through survivors guilt and it was something I never thought would happen to me. This book actually helped me through this by showing me how to have compassion for myself. Great book and written very well.

I received this book for free through goodreads for my personal opinion.
Elizabeth
Jan 05, 2016 rated it really liked it
Shelves: self-help
Compassion. I worked through many of the exercises here and discovered a notable absence of it in my life, not towards others but towards myself.
Cynthia Gathoni
rated it liked it
Oct 16, 2018
Maura Fenlon-treffeisen
rated it it was amazing
Dec 28, 2016
Cecilia Dunbar Hernandez
rated it it was amazing
Jul 04, 2015
Rebecca Ring
rated it really liked it
Feb 02, 2017
Poppy Smith
rated it it was amazing
Aug 09, 2016
Lauren
rated it it was amazing
May 16, 2018
Becky Laverell
rated it liked it
Mar 04, 2018
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