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304 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 14, 2015
I don't think it's about who loves you first. It's about who loves you best."
On a good day I'm curvy. On a bad one, I'm plump.
Most of the days are bad ones.
Michael might be sick of being "second choice." But the rejected-woman part of me?
SHE'S tired of being the platonic sidekick.
So, what's the problem?" he asks.
"I just...it's never like it is in the movies."
Michael makes a strangled noise and turns toward my nightstand, opening a drawer.
"What are you doing?" I ask.
"Looking for a gun," he mutters, before shutting it again. "Are you fucking kidding me? You're one of those girls waiting for the movie kiss?"
I scrunch my nose at his disbelieving face. "They do exist."
With Chloe, it's easy to forget that I'm nobody. Because she makes me feel like somebody.
...at the lesson, the other day, she was...forward."
"FORWARD? I swear to God, Beefcake, every now and then you slip in a word that makes me think you're a nineteenth-century butler."
"Yeah? You like? What if I slip a British accent in there?"
"Don't you dare. I'll swoon. I mean it."
Chloe Bellamy is different. And I mean that in an I could strangle her way, not I’m intrigued.
She laughs again, and it’s genuine and bold, and suddenly it hits me: Chloe Bellamy deserves better. She deserves better than what I got.
"With Chloe, it's easy to forget that I'm nobody.
Because she makes me feel like somebody."
“You play tennis, Chloe?” I call out as I pull out another ball and serve it to Kristin, harder this time.
“Do I look like I’m all about cardio?” she calls back in a cheerful voice.
“What about when you were younger? You didn’t take lessons?”
“Um, that’s a negative,” Chloe says around a mouthful of chocolate. She has a candy bar now. “Some of us were reading Harry Potter like normal kids.”
”With Chloe, it’s easy to forget that I’m nobody. Because she makes me feel like somebody.”
I don’t know why I keep doing that. Coming back to Chloe. She’s annoying as fuck, and yet there’s something strangely calming about her manic personality.
I do a squat to demonstrate … “Okay?” I say, doing another since she didn’t mimic my motion the second time.
She watches my movement in the mirror. “One more time,” she says.
I comply, and then mutter a string of curses because Chloe Bellamy has just reached out in the middle of a busy gym and patted my ass.
“Very nice,” she says, sounding surprised.
She shrugs. “You just got so upset when I was ogling that other guy instead of you, so I wanted to make you feel good.”
“A girl wants to be loved, sure, and I thought I wanted that. I thought I wanted that from Devon. And now…I don’t know about that. But I do know that I want to be wanted. I want to be wanted by you.”
The thought of Chloe changing kills me a little. She’s one of the most real girls I know, and I’d give anything to have her stay that way, just as she is.
“I’ve tried being someone’s second choice.”
… His voice is raspy, and so quiet that I barely hear what he says next. “I can’t do it again.”
“I don’t think it’s about who loves you first. It’s about who loves you best. And that’s me.”
… “I love you best. More than I love anyone. More than you’ve ever been loved.”